The Fortune Cookie's Always Right
by Meredith Girl
Summary: Remember the party that Emily and Richard organized sophomore year of Yale for Rory to meet eligible bachelors? Well suppose Logan's "rescue" was a bit more intimate, and suppose Dean saw it? Rogan by way of a RoryDeanLogan love triangle.
1. Let all your friends kiss you like that?

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

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**Disclaimer**: I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note**: Remember the party that Emily and Richard organized sophomore year of Yale for Rory to meet eligible bachelors? Well suppose Logan's "rescue" was a bit more intimate, and suppose Dean saw it?

Remember: This takes place directly after "You Jump, I Jump Jack"; we pick up the story halfway through "The Party's Over." Rory and Dean have had a depressing we-don't-connect-anymore meal where he probably didn't read her LDB article, and Logan did. We begin to mess with the existing Gilmore Universe by altering the party scene and creating a love triangle that didn't have a chance to play out…

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CHAPTER 1: YOU LET ALL YOUR FRIENDS KISS YOU LIKE THAT?

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A sixteen-piece orchestra played quietly in the background as scores of Yale alumni roamed the ballroom. Emily and Richard Gilmore were talking animatedly with one of Richard's business associates near the grand staircase. 

Over on the balcony, Rory's eyes glazed over as she listened to the latest male specimen hand-picked by her grandmother drone on about his newly acquired sports car. She stifled a yawn and threw in a random 'uh-huh' whenever he paused.

"Do you wanna see it?" she heard him say.

"Oh, well, um," Rory searched for a polite refusal. "Well, actually, uh…" She turned as the door to the patio opened, the music wafting through the now-open door.

"So sorry I'm late, how's my best girl?" Logan interrupted as he strode up to Rory, throwing one arm around her shoulders and giving her a quick squeeze. Rory tried to hide her surprise. The last time she saw Logan was the Life and Death Brigade event – what was he doing here? And why was he smiling like that?

"Fine now," Rory said, her voice dripping with sweetness. She might as well play along.

The drone looked confused.

"Oh, have you met Logan?" Rory asked innocently, leaning her head on his shoulder and slipping her arm around his waist.

"Logan Huntzberger," Logan said, sticking out his hand, keeping one arm around Rory.

"Jordan Chase," he replied, shaking Logan's proffered hand. "Uh, so you're Rory's…?" he asked, looking confused.

"Yup!" confirmed Logan cheerily. "Going on a year and a half," he said, smiling down at Rory.

"Huh. Well, I've got to…huh." Jordan walked back inside, scratching his head.

Logan watched him leave, then dropped his arm as Rory took a step away.

"Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Rory said, relieved to be rid of the drone.

"Yeah, you looked a little bored there, Ace," Logan smirked, leaning against the balcony wall and crossing his arms over his chest.

"Not that I don't find dissecting the engine of his latest greatest car incredibly interesting but…yes. Completely bored," Rory confirmed with a small smile, walking over to lean on the wall near Logan. Her smile quickly turned to a frown.

"I just can't believe my grandparents," Rory said angrily.

"Well, they just want to find some fine, upstanding, well-connected young man to court you," Logan said, tilting his head to acknowledge the sea of Yalies in the next room. Rory rolled her eyes. "Seriously, though, I've been to a million of these things. They're pointless," he said, blowing it off.

"Well I don't understand. I mean, I already have a boyfriend," she said, puzzled. She missed Logan's surprised look; he hid it before she glanced at him.

"Hmm. But does he have a trust fund?" Logan asked playfully.

Rory didn't answer, but her face looked troubled. Logan sized her up for a moment before speaking.

"Well, Ace, you're gonna have to choose someone from this room tonight. That's how these things work, you know."

"Are you serious?" Rory asked, torn between incredulity and derision.

"Deadly," Logan said, a twinkle in his eye.

"I don't think I can stand meeting another heir to the fortune tonight," Rory moaned.

Logan just laughed. "Tell ya what, Ace. Every time you get yourself in a situation, you just give me the signal and I'll come play boyfriend."

Rory scoffed. "I don't know whether to be thankful or scared." She contemplated her options, then sighed. "Ok." She pushed off the wall and straightened her dress. "I mean this can last only, what, one or two more hours?"

"Pretty much," affirmed Logan.

"Ok. But my grandparents are so dead after tonight," she grumbled. Rory paused. "Wait, so what's our signal?"

Logan thought for a moment. "How about a Carol Burnett?"

"Gotcha," Rory confirmed. Logan opened the door for her, following her onto the floor. Rory stood there awkwardly for a moment until her grandmother caught her eye. Logan just winked at her and headed to the bar. He got a drink and positioned himself to keep an eye on Rory.

"Rory, dear, come meet James," Emily said, approaching Rory with yet another young man in tow. "Your grandfather used to work for his great-grandfather," she said. Rory sighed inwardly and dutifully smiled up at the latest match. "Oh dear, is that Evelyn? I have the most urgent DAR business with her. If you'll excuse me," Emily said, not-so-subtly breezing away.

"So," leered James. "You party?"

"Um, well, I like to have a good time, relatively substance-free," Rory replied hesitantly.

"Uh huh. Relatively? Right," winked James. "So, I have an apartment near here if you want to get out of those party clothes," he said, leaning suggestively toward Rory.

Rory immediately stepped back and pulled on her ear. Meanwhile, at the bar, Logan noticed a boy in casual clothes and a leather jacket walk up looking very confused. He guessed at this boy's identity, but gave no appearance of recognizing him. When he saw Rory pull on her ear, he grinned and set down his drink.

"Duty calls," he said to the mystery boy. He strode over to Rory as the boy glowered.

"Ace!" he said, coming up behind her.

"There you are," Rory said, relief evident in her voice. She tried not to act too surprised when Logan put his arms around her waist, holding her from behind and nuzzling her neck. From the bar, the mystery boy squinted as if he could not believe his eyes.

"James, this is Logan," she said, a little more confident now. "Logan is my boyfriend." James stepped back in surprise.

"Logan, this is James. James was just inviting me to his apartment," Rory said innocently.

"Oh really?" Logan said, threateningly.

"Whoa, let's not get carried away here. I didn't know – I mean, I would never have – I mean…oh, would you look at the time? I have to…go…now," said James, quickly walking away.

"Ok, I owe you big time!" said Rory, laughing as she turned to face Logan. Her laugh died away as she realized that Logan's arms were still around her, his face just inches away.

"Um, thanks," she said pointedly, trying to extricate herself from his arms. But Logan didn't let her go.

"Don't you think we could avoid me having to rescue you over and over again with one little public display of affection?" Logan murmured in her ear, quickly glancing around the room and noticing the boy in the leather jacket slowly making his way toward them, getting close enough to hear their conversation.

"Logan," Rory said, laughing nervously, "You're forgetting I really do have a boyfriend."

"But he's not here right now, is he?" Logan said. Rory just shook her head silently. "So, one little kiss and all the crazies go away," Logan insisted, trying to persuade her.

Rory placed her hands on his chest. "Logan, I don't think…"

Rory was cut off by Logan's sudden kiss. She was surprised at first, pushing away off his chest, but as the kiss deepened, she relaxed into his embrace, kissing him back and allowing his tongue entry into her mouth. Her hands pulled on the lapels of his coat, drawing him closer. Logan's hands moved from Rory's waist to roam the exposed back of her dress, sending chills up Rory's spine. Rory slipped her hands up onto both sides of Logan's face, threading her fingers through the back of his hair. Logan pulled Rory as close as he possibly could, until their entire bodies were touching. He gradually became aware of the fact that everyone near them had stopped talking and were most likely staring, and pulled away slowly. He opened his eyes to see Rory standing there looking flushed, her eyes still closed. She opened her eyes and looked at Logan with shock on her face, and took a step backwards.

Logan was still in a daze when he felt someone jerk his shoulder, turning him away from Rory, and was still recovering from the kiss when a fist connected with his face.

"Dean!" shrieked Rory. Logan stumbled backwards, clutching his jaw but looking determinedly up to be ready for the next punch. Rory grabbed Dean's arm and pulled him away from Logan. He just shook her off and looked angrily at her.

"Who is this, Rory?" he asked angrily, pointing at Logan.

"Logan. He's just a friend," Rory explained, fear rising in her throat.

"What, you let all your 'friends' kiss you like that?" Dean said accusatorily. "That's bullshit, Rory."

"No, he was just helping me out," Rory tried to explain, the words tripping over each other to get out. Dean just looked incredulously at Rory.

"Listen, let's just calm down and discuss this like rational adults," reasoned Logan, straightening his tie and summoning the famous Huntzberger charm. "Can I get you a drink?" he offered Dean.

"I wouldn't say a word right now if I were you," warned Dean. Logan looked at Rory in askance.

"Dean, come on," Rory said, pulling on his arm, leading him to a side room away from the silent crowd. "Logan, just…" Rory said helplessly.

"Disappear," Logan said, finishing her sentence. Rory looked grateful. "See ya 'round, Ace," he said, playfully saluting her and massaging his jaw as he walked away.

Rory shut the door to her grandfather's study.

"What's going on, Rory?" Dean asked.

"Look, my grandparents arranged this joke of a party. As you know, I figured it was some Yale Alumni thing. I get here, and Grandma dresses me up like so," Rory said, pausing to gesture to her ridiculous jewelry and overdone hair, "and I come downstairs to find all of their friends with sons my age just standing around to talk to me." Rory's face hardened as she sent angry thoughts to her grandparents. Dean looked impatient, so she hurried along her story. "So anyway, I was stuck talking to this particularly horrendous boy, and Logan, my friend from the newspaper, walks up and makes some remark about being my boyfriend to drive away the unsavory character." She looked at Dean, whose arms were still crossed and eyes were still narrowed. "I thanked him, and told him how upset I was about this party since I already had a perfectly wonderful boyfriend," she paused and gave Dean a little smile, "and he offered to play the fake boyfriend card anytime I needed rescuing throughout the evening. When you showed up, he had just rescued me from a seriously disgusting guy who was propositioning me, and to scare away any future interests, he suggested a kiss so he didn't have to rescue me over and over for the rest of the evening," Rory said, finally running out of breath.

"Yeah, that much I caught," Dean said sarcastically. "So why follow through?" he asked, part angry and part hurt.

"Well, I reminded him that I had a real boyfriend, and he said…um…well I don't remember what he said, but then he kissed me anyway," Rory said, turning red.

Dean knew very well exactly what words transpired, but he didn't say anything.

"It didn't mean anything," argued Rory. "He just kissed me. That's it," she said, finally running out of things to say.

"But you kissed him back," Dean said pointedly through gritted teeth.

Rory didn't know how to respond. "Well, not at first, but at that point I could hardly pretend he was my boyfriend if I slapped him for kissing me. It had to look real otherwise somebody else might have tried it," she said, trying to convince herself as much as Dean.

Dean just looked at her for a long, hard moment.

"Dean," Rory said softly. "He was just trying to help." That was the wrong thing to say, judging by Dean's expression. She tried a different tact. "You know I love _you_. That was nothing but a rescue effort gone horribly awry." She tentatively touched Dean's arm. "I would never intentionally hurt you, you know that, right?" she asked, pleading in her eyes.

Dean tried to overcome the gnawing jealousy in the pit of his stomach, a feeling that was momentarily softened by the look in Rory's eyes. He was trying to get over flashbacks of the Jess situation. He shoved aside his anger and reluctantly let Rory hug him.

"Whatever," he said off-handedly. Rory looked up at him and he finally smiled down at her. "You know I can't stay mad at you," he said. Rory smiled back.

"Are we okay?" she asked.

"Yeah, we're okay," he replied. "Just…" Dean hesitated. "Just promise me that you won't let Logan 'help' you again, ok?"

"Oh, definitely," Rory said, vehemently. "To be honest, I don't quite like him. He's one of those Richie Rich guys who gets everything handed to him on a silver platter. One of those take-over-the-family-empire kids," Rory said, allowing disdain to carefully leak into her voice. Dean recognized it as going a bit overkill, but he let it slide.

"Yeah, well, let's not waste time talking about him," Dean said, an air of finality in his voice, leaning down to kiss her. He couldn't help but notice that Rory kissed him with less passion than she had when kissing Logan, but he shrugged it off.

"So, um, what say you meet me back at Luke's in about an hour. I think I have a little damage control to do here," said Rory, already trying to figure out how to explain the fracas to her grandparents.

"Ok," agreed Dean. "Do you want me to stay?"

"No," Rory said thoughtfully, "I'm pretty sure Logan has left by now, and if you can also slip out the back I can go be creative and talk to the elder Gilmores without either of you there to complicate things."

"Ok, see you later," Dean said, with a peck on the lips. He left the study and made his way back to his truck. Rory remained in the study, leaning against her grandfather's desk, pondering just exactly how to explain to her grandparents why her boyfriend was throwing punches at the heir to the Huntzberger fortune.

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Ta da! You like? So obviously this story is going to take place a lot at Yale and be Rory-centric, but don't be surprised if some chapters end up in Stars Hollow, where we get a little Luke/Lorelai interaction and more crazy Kirk-schemes. 

Oh yes, and the review button is your friend! Let me know what you think, because sometimes you get to influence the plot... :)


	2. Black Eyes and Fortune Cookies

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

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**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** I changed the name of this story once I found out that there's already a story circulating with the same title. My apologies! And on to the fun...

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CHAPTER 2: BLACK EYES AND FORTUNE COOKIES

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The Yale Daily News room was bustling with activity as Doyle followed Paris around, weaving around copy machines and desks. 

"I just don't see what the problem is, Doyle," Paris said, walking briskly to her desk.

"Paris, I've told you a hundred times; the man is threatening to get a restraining order. Cornering him in the men's bathroom was over the line," Doyle shrieked in frustration.

"Oh, what, so if I had a penis this would all be ok?" Paris countered in a demanding tone.

"What?" said Doyle, clearly nearing a nervous breakdown.

"If I were a man that would have been no problem, but since I'm a woman it's unacceptable? Unbelievable!" said Paris, plopping down at her desk.

"I'm not discussing this with you anymore. Gilmore, some help please?" Doyle pleaded.

Rory lifted her head above her computer. "Oh, no! You are on your own, buddy," she said, returning to her article.

Exasperated, Doyle leaned on Paris's desk. "Look," he said in a final plea, "do what you have to do, just please stay on the legal side of stalking, got it?"

"No problem," Paris said with a fake smile. Satisfied, Doyle sniffed and returned to his desk. As soon as he was out of earshot, her smile was wiped away.

"Honestly," Paris said, turning to Rory, "I got my scoop, so what's the big deal?"

"Not getting into it, Paris," Rory said distractedly.

"What?" said Paris, craning her neck to hear.

"Five hundred more words, Paris," Rory said, not taking her eyes off the screen.

"Fine. I have a few more questions left – I wonder if I can still catch the senator at the country club; he shouldn't be leaving for another 27 minutes. Bye," Paris said, off to finish her interview.

"Bye," Rory said, waving one hand while typing with the other.

"Geez, watch where you're going," Paris said, bumping into someone on her way out. "Hey, nice shiner there," she said, getting no response.

Rory looked up to see Logan Huntzberger making his way to his desk – with a noticeable black eye. "Oh no," she breathed. Rory watched as Logan sat down at his desk and began to type.

Doyle was obviously too frazzled from dealing with Paris to even attempt conversation with the Huntzberger heir. He took one look at Logan and flew out the door, shouting, "Coffee break!"

Rory looked around to see if anyone noticed Logan's presence, let alone his black eye, but everyone seemed to be going about their business. She willed Logan to look up so she could – well, smile at him or something – but he persisted in staring at his monitor. Suddenly she got an idea: she would instant message him.

_R: Sorry about the party… are you ok?_

Rory waited for Logan's reply, but when there didn't seem to be one forthcoming, she tried again.

_R: I'm so sorry about Dean. I didn't know he would be there._

Still no reply. Rory began to get annoyed.

_R: Look, I didn't know my real boyfriend would be there, but there's no reason to be mad at me. After all, it was your brilliant idea to create some sort of public display of affection, one that I didn't pre-approve, so that black eye is entirely your fault._

Rory peeked around her computer to study Logan's face. He didn't even smirk.

_R: Well all I can say is that you either have one hell of a poker face or you really don't give a shit. Either way, I hope it was all worth it; and I hope your face hurts._

Rory harrumphed. She closed the instant message and saved her work before slinging her purse onto her shoulder and briskly walking to the door. She almost made it when Logan's arm shot out, grabbing her wrist as she passed by his desk. Shocked, Rory looked down at their hands before letting her gaze rise to meet Logan's. She shivered as his thumb traced over her pulse point.

Quiet enough that only Rory could hear, he spoke. "It was worth it," he said, smirking. He let go of Rory's hand as she stood there, trembling. She opened her mouth to say something, but was speechless. Rory closed her mouth and narrowed her eyes before walking out of the room as quickly as her feet would carry her.

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"What did I tell you, Rory? _What_ did I tell you?" Paris said, gearing up for a fight. She slammed shut her laptop lid and picked it up off the coffee table. She stared up at Rory from the couch. 

"Paris, gum does not count," Rory said, sighing, holding a stick of gum halfway to her mouth.

"Yes it does," Paris insisted.

Rory sighed and tossed the gum onto the coffee table. "How, Paris? How does it count?" she asked, hands on her hips.

"Because! Gum requires chewing, and chewing reminds me of food. Therefore, I cannot have gum in my presence," Paris explained.

"Oh my God, Paris. You know you don't actually have to fast for Ramadan in order to write about it," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

"Yes, I do! I need to get the full experience," Paris said.

Just then, there was a knock on the door. "This isn't over," Paris said, storming into her room. Rory went to answer the door.

"Marty!" she exclaimed, giving him a short hug. Marty blushed and walked through the door.

"Hey, I totally scored at the party tonight," he said, holding up a brown paper bag.

"Oh yeah?" Rory said, peering into it. "Ooh! Tiny little egg rolls! Sweet!"

"Rory! I can smell that from here," said Paris from her room, leaning out enough to give Marty a death glare. Marty looked up.

"Does she mean me or the food?" he asked.

"I'm sure she means the food," she said, patting his arm reassuringly and sending Paris a look.

"You better be taking that out of here!" Paris called as Rory led Marty to her room.

"Ok, that time I think she meant me a little bit," Marty said, flopping down on Rory's bed and throwing his coat across the back of her desk chair.

"Ignore her," Rory said simply.

"Oh that's ok; I usually do. Egg roll?" he offered.

"Don't mind if I do," Rory said, selecting one and sitting beside him. "This is better than the caviar," she said with a full mouth. Marty just grinned.

"Check the bottom of the bag," he said, holding out the bag. "I swiped a few fortune cookies."

"Oooh!" Rory said with interest. She reached in and grabbed one. "You too," she said, tilting the bag back to Marty. He got one as well.

"You first," said Rory.

Marty cracked open his fortune cookie and pulled out the slip of paper. "A-hem. 'Chinese food is good,'" he read.

"In bed," they said together.

Rory started laughing. "They got that right!"

Marty just shook his head. "Leave it to me to not even get a real fortune."

"You can have mine," offered Rory.

"No, no, there are rules for this sort of thing," Marty said. "Go ahead, open it."

"Ok." Rory opened her cookie and proceeded to eat it, leaving the fortune on her lap. Marty raised an eyebrow. "That's part of the deal, you know," she said. "You're supposed to eat the cookie first or else your fortune won't come true…or something like that, anyway."

"Ok," Marty said dubiously.

Rory cleared her throat and read her fortune. " 'Romance comes into your life this year in a very unusual sort of way'…hmm."

"Now see, unusual could mean anything," Marty pointed out.

"True," said Rory, starting to throw away her fortune.

"Wait!" said Marty, a little too quickly.

"What?" Rory asked, pausing.

"Well, I mean, what if for some weird reason your fortune comes true?" Marty said, turning a little pink. "I mean, you know, you _did_ eat the cookie first."

Rory thought about it. "Well, but I already have a boyfriend," she said, looking at her fortune. Still, things with her and Dean seemed a bit shaky at the moment, and she knew deep down that there was something not right between them. She made a decision. "Well, we'll just see what happens, hm?" she said, standing up and sliding her fortune onto her French memo board.

Just then, they heard the door open and close.

"D'you think Paris left?" Marty asked, with exaggerated hope in his voice. Rory laughed.

"Maybe the egg rolls got to her," she said, giggling.

"God, I hope so," Marty said, stretching out on Rory's bed, hands behind his head.

"What's going on, Rory?" a voice said from the doorway to her room.

"Dean! Hi! What are you doing here? I thought you had to work!" Rory said, moving to embrace him. He held her arms when she tried to put them around him.

"What's wrong?" she asked, confused.

"What's wrong? First the party, now I find you here with a guy in your room? _On your bed_?" Dean exclaimed in disbelief.

Marty looked worried and sat up.

"Dean," Rory said, partially annoyed, "this is my friend, Marty." Marty stood up and offered his hand.

"Hi…so…um…you're the boyfriend. Nice to meet you," Marty said, his voice shaking a little. Dean reluctantly shook his hand but didn't say anything.

"So..um…I'm gonna go, now," Marty said, pointing to the door.

"Marty, you don't have to leave," Rory said, shooting an angry glance at Dean.

"No, no, I have to go…to…a thing," he said, grabbing his coat. "Nice to meet you, Dean. Later, Rory," Marty said, walking quickly out the main door.

Rory crossed her arms and looked at Dean. "That was really rude, and way out of line," she said angrily.

"Come on, Rory. Is he another one of your 'friends'?" Dean replied.

"God, Dean! Yes, Marty is just a friend. And he was fully clothed, for heaven's sake! Not to mention that I was on the other side of the room. This is really paranoid of you, Dean," Rory said.

"Sorry," Dean said grudgingly. "It's just…you said Logan was just a friend - "

"And he _is_ just a friend, more like an acquaintance," Rory said. "Besides, I thought we already went over all that. You can't go scaring poor Marty like that with your whole caveman possessive thing."

"Sorry!" Dean exclaimed, running his fingers through his hair in frustration. "It's just… I gave up a marriage to be with you, and I don't mean to bring it up, it's just that I freak out when I think about the possibility of this not working, you know?"

Rory stood there, fuming, and then her expression softened. "Look," she said firmly, "in order for this to work, you have to trust me, because if you don't then this will never work. As for Lindsey, that was not my call and you know it, and it's not fair to use that in an argument." Rory suddenly felt tired and sank into her desk chair.

Dean looked at her and crouched in front of her. "Rory?" he said at eye level, his hands on her knees.

"What?" she responded warily.

"I'm really sorry. I know I can trust you," Dean said, trying to convince himself as much as Rory.

"It's ok," Rory said quietly, looking down at her hands and playing with the hem of her shirt.

"Hey," Dean said. Rory looked up. "I love you," he said.

"I know," Rory said, searching his eyes for the Dean she fell in love with.

"Marty seems ok," he offered.

Rory gave a small laugh. "Yeah, he's a strange one. Harmless, but strange."

Dean smiled, but then his smile turned a bit cold. "I still hate Logan," he said.

"He's not _that_ bad…for a snob," Rory said. She started to laugh.

"What?" Dean asked, squeezing her knee.

"Oh, nothing. It's just that he totally had a black eye yesterday," she said between guffaws.

"Well, good," Dean said proudly. Rory's laugh died away with unease. She immediately felt bad for laughing at Logan, but she did think he was messing with her. Why did he derive such pleasure out of making her uncomfortable? She tried to get Logan out of her head.

"So…" Dean said suggestively, pulling Rory toward the bed. "Kyle apparently has four dates in a row tonight, and he says he'll be there all night long," he mock-pouted.

"Well, how rude, kicking you out like that. Whatever will you do?" Rory said, sliding onto the bed beside him.

"I suppose I'll have to think of something," Dean said, kissing Rory.

* * *

Rory woke up to a loud knocking – no, make that pounding – on her bedroom door. She reluctantly opened her eyes to find a sleeping Dean in her bed. She cocked her head and looked at him. Somehow the drool made him less attractive. Apparently the whole so-cute-in-the-morning thing didn't apply to Dean. 

"Rory!" she heard from the other side of the door.

"Coming, Paris!" Rory said. She carefully climbed over Dean so as not to disturb him and threw on her robe.

"What?" she said, cracking the door.

"Look, I'm not Cliff Clavin here, ok?" Paris said, thrusting a manila envelope.

"What?" Rory said, wiping the sleep out of her eyes as she took the envelope.

"Mail, Rory, I'm not your freakin' mailman."

Rory looked at the manila envelope in her hands. "How did you get this?" she asked.

"It was slipped underneath our door, and it has your name on it. We're done here. I'm going to my craft corner," Paris said, turning around and walking across the room.

Rory rolled her eyes and quietly shut her door. She went over to her desk and sat down in her chair. Curious, she inspected the envelope. The front was simply marked "Rory Gilmore." She flipped it over to the back. The flap was sealed with an old fashioned wax seal with the initials "LDB." Rory gasped. She broke the seal and dumped the contents onto her desk. A blindfold fell out as well as a note.

_Ace,_

_You up for another adventure? 10:00 a.m. in the medieval history section of the main library. Wear the blindfold._

_LH_

Rory smiled as she considered the note. She picked up her digital camera from the shelf of her desk and turned it on. She began to flip through the pictures from the scaffolding jump. "Well," she said to herself, "in omnia paratus…"

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The review button is your friend! Coming up: possible interaction with Colin and Finn... and who knows? Stars Hollow may be in the mix... 


	3. She's Not My Type

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right**

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**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Sorry this one took longer to come out! This chapter's twice as long, and plants a few seeds for chapters to come...

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CHAPTER 3: SHE'S NOT MY TYPE

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Luke walked out of the Gilmore kitchen in his pajama pants and a t-shirt, a mug of coffee in each hand. He set them down on the end table, eyeing the stack of DVDs with mistrust.

Lorelai grinned. "O-k, we've got National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, A Charlie Brown Christmas, Christmas in Connecticut, Holiday Inn, White Christmas, A Christmas Story, Frosty the Snowman, Santa Claus is Coming to Town, How the Grinch Stole Christmas, Home Alone 1 and 2, It's A Wonderful Life, The Lemon Drop Kid, Miracle on 34th Street – the original, the remake sucked – Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, The Santa Clause, and all the Christmas Carols – Alistair Sims, George C. Scott, Patrick Stewart, the Muppets, and, most importantly, A Christmas Carol: The Musical, starring Kelsey Grammer as Ebenezer Scrooge," she said, flopping down on the couch.

"We're going to watch _all_ of these? And why especially the musical version?" asked Luke.

Lorelai laughed. "Oh-ho-no, my friend, we are going to fall asleep halfway through It's A Wonderful Life. And the musical version is for mocking. Hello, have you met me? Lorelai Gilmore, Mocker Extraordinaire!"

The phone rang. "What, I thought no phones during movie nights!" Luke protested. "Come on, that's the rule!"

"True," Lorelai said slowly, slinking toward the phone, "but it's not technically a movie _night_, it's a movie _morning_."

"Technicality!" growled Luke with a hint of a smile. He sighed. "Go, answer."

"Thank you!" Lorelai said, grinning and grabbing the phone.

"Hello, you've reached Lorelai and Rory and Luke, except not really Rory because she's at Yale and only comes home for laundry, ungrateful child, and not really Luke because he has his own house but we have lots of sex here so it's almost like he lives here," Lorelai announced.

"First, I do not only come home for laundry, I also come home so you can feed me, and second, eww! Gross!" Rory replied.

"Oh, was that you, sweetie? Sorry, didn't realize," Lorelai teased.

"Whatever, mom! You totally have caller ID," Rory said.

"Hmm, I suppose I do," Lorelai said, looking at her cell phone with a sly smile.

"Mm hm. Besides, what if that had been Grandma?" Rory countered.

"Point taken," Lorelai said, making a face and shifting positions on the couch. "What's up, babe?"

"Well," Rory said, looking around the quad in front of the library. "I just wanted to let you know that I may be incommunicado for a few days."

Lorelai gave Luke a questioning look. "Incommunicado how?"

"Well, I can't go into it right now, but just don't freak if I don't call you back, and don't freak if Paris calls you freaking out that I didn't come home at night or something," Rory said calmly.

"Um, ok," Lorelai said. Suddenly, realization dawned on her. "So is this another Life and Death Brigade event?"

"Rory Gilmore, reporting from deep inside," Rory quipped.

"Dirty!"

"Mom!" Rory whined. "I can't tell you anything more; it would compromise the integrity of the event," she said loftily.

"Fine, fine," Lorelai said, waving her hand in the air. "I just have three things to say to you."

"Shoot."

"One: bring your toothbrush. No one likes a reporter with stinky breath, especially for those up-close-and-personal interviews. Two: leave bits of cloth as a trail so in case you never come back we know how to find you. Actually, leave a trail of biscotti. That's more enticing."

"Ok, and when my breath is fresh wherever I've been hypothetically abducted, what happens when the animals eat all the biscotti?" Rory asked.

"Oh honey, animals don't eat biscotti. Only pretentious Starbucks aficionados and Europeans eat biscotti," Lorelai said.

"No, animals will eat anything," Rory stated.

"Anything? You think animals would eat our Bid-A-Basket picnic lunches?" Lorelai taunted.

Rory sighed. "What's the third thing?"

"Just a minute. I'm trying to remember what we put in our lunches last year."

"Third thing, Mom!"

"Bah! So I forgot the third thing. Just go be reporter-y and don't die, ok?"

"Ok. Bye, Mom."

"Bye, sweets."

Lorelai hung up the phone and sighed. She set it down on the coffee table. "So since you are a hermit and have never seen a movie I haven't introduced you to, you get to pick. Let's start with…one of the Christmas Carols. Which one?" Lorelai said, holding up the DVDs.

Luke rolled his eyes. "Whatever, it doesn't matter since we have to watch them all."

"Hmm," said Lorelai. She thought for a moment then chose the Patrick Stewart.

"Let's start with Captain Picard," she said with a mischievous gleam in her eye. "Do you, um, need to wear your Star Trek shirt for this?"

"Just put the damn thing in," Luke said.

"Hey, buddy," Lorelai said, holding up her hand and making the Vulcan greeting. "I come in peace. Live long and prosper!"

"Oh geez," Luke said, sliding down in his seat.

* * *

Rory looked around the quad before stashing her cell in her purse and walking into the library. She made her way to the medieval history section and waited patiently. She started to browse through the books. 

"A-hem." She heard a mystery voice clearing their throat on the other side of the books. Rory peered through the shelves to see Logan pointing at his eyes.

"Oh, right," she said, hastily putting on the blindfold. She patiently waited for Logan to walk down her aisle. After a minute or so, she started getting worried. Was this just a prank? Where was he? She heard footsteps and unconsciously took a step backwards.

"Gettin' sloppy there, Ace," Logan said quietly, his voice clearly near her ear. Rory shivered, then made a quick recovery.

"Trust me?" he asked, leading her down the aisle and suddenly stopping.

"Well…" she said, pretending to think it over.

"Hey!"

"Just kidding. I trust you implicitly," she said sweetly, turning her face to the direction of his voice.

"Ok then," he replied. "Steps comin' up."

"O-k," Rory said. Logan placed her hand in the crook of his arm and led her down the back stairwell of the library. They walked across grass, finally coming to pavement.

"Question: why the blindfold? I already know it's you guys," Rory asked.

"Ah, good point," Logan said, "but this is more fun. The blindfold comes off in the limo," he said.

"What?" shrieked Colin.

"Relax, the windows are tinted."

"Oh."

"Hi, Colin!" Rory greeted amiably.

"Hey Rory," Colin replied.

"Are we there yet?" she asked.

"Patience, young Skywalker," chided Logan. "Here's the limo now – watch your head."

Rory heeded his warning and slid into the limousine.

"Drive on, Frank!" Logan said after Frank returned to the driver's seat. "Ok, blindfold coming off," he said, untying the blindfold over Rory's eyes. She blinked and then noticed that there was an extra person in the limousine.

"Hello, possums!" Finn proclaimed.

"Oh no, it's Dame Edna's ugly stepsister," Logan moaned.

"Hey, I'm just trying to get in touch with my roots, ok?" Finn said in defense.

"He seems more like a Sir Les Patterson, I think," Rory offered.

"Well as long as I'm not a bloody friend of Kenny, I'll take it," Finn said. "Now where's this super secret location? I should murder you all for waking me up at this ungodly hour," Finn said, sunglasses perched on his nose.

"Yes, where is this mystery location?" asked Rory. "And might I add that the blindfold was totally unnecessary."

"Ok, first of all, I can't tell you the mystery location; have you learned nothing? And secondly, the blindfold was for my own personal entertainment."

"Fine, fine," Rory said. She pulled out her pencil and small notebook from her purse.

"So. Are we on our way to another big event? Will there be jumping off another high rise?"

"Come on Ace, you don't think that we only meet once a year, do you? What kind of secret society would that make us? Think: what are the absolute basics of any organization?"

"Well are there…like…chapter meetings? Is this your typical Greek structure?"

"See, I knew you were smart," Logan said.

Rory playfully smacked his arm. "Seriously; I thought you only had one big event each year – and wasn't that it? I mean, last time?"

"Seriously, Ace, that was our biggest event, but not our only one. This one is just going to be for our class; it's significantly smaller. We each have our own bits to organize for the event, and you are going to help us organize ours," Logan explained.

"Wait, you mean we're not on our way to an actual Life and Death Brigade event? Then what am I here for?" Rory asked, confused and a little peeved.

"All in good time, Ace, all in good time…"

* * *

"Well, we're here," Logan said as the limo slowed to a stop. 

"Would here be the middle of a forest?" Rory asked warily.

Frank opened the door to the limo and everyone climbed out. Rory's jaw dropped in shock.

"Wow, a twenty minute drive – I should have known," she said.

"After you," Logan said.

"What is this place? It looks like Disneyland!" said Colin.

"Oh, the sun!" complained Finn.

"I don't understand," Rory said. "Why are we in Stars Hollow?"

* * *

"Running right on schedule," Logan said, checking his watch. 

"We better have a coffee break on that schedule of yours, mate, 'cause my head's killing me," Finn moaned.

"I believe this place offers coffee; Rory would know," Logan said, smirking.

Rory looked up at the sign. "Weston's does serve coffee, yes, but it's not the best in Star's Hollow. You should have done your research," she teased.

"Well who _does_ serve the best coffee, then?" Logan asked.

"And how far away is it?" said Finn, now shielding his eyes from the sun, leaning on Colin for support.

"Get a grip, man," Colin said, pushing him off.

"Well, I mean, I don't want to mess with the integrity of the event," Rory said, a gleam in her eye.

"No, no," assured Logan, "my research shows that this town could only encompass a maximum of four city blocks worth of a downtown, so please, lead the way."

"Ass," Rory mumbled under her breath.

"What was that, Ace?" Logan asked dangerously.

"Nothing," she replied sweetly. "This way, boys," she said, leading them down the sidewalk.

"I'm serious; it really does look like Disneyland," Colin said as they walked.

"I don't think I've ever been to Disneyland," Finn mused.

"Yes you have," said Logan.

"Never!" Finn said in astonishment.

"Yes you have," Logan asserted.

"When?" Finn asked.

"A couple of years ago. We all went, don't you remember?" Logan said, directing the question to Colin.

"Oh yeah; but I think it was Disney World, not Disneyland," Colin said.

"Why the hell don't I remember this?" Finn wondered.

"Oh, you were drunk the whole time," Colin said offhand.

"Oh," Finn said, as if that explained it all.

Rory rolled her eyes. "How is it that you don't know the difference between Disneyland and Disney World? Don't they have different castles? And, more importantly, aren't they on opposite sides of the country?"

"Good point," Logan admitted. "But when you've seen one overcrowded theme park, you've seen them all," he said with a shrug.

"Well, to be perfectly honest, I've never been to either, but it amazes me the places you go and the things you do that you take for granted."

"Hold the phone – you've never been to Disney World? Ace, I'm surprised at you. Every kid goes to Disney World," Logan said.

"Not this kid," she said. "We didn't exactly have the funds to take lavish trips every year."

"Please," scoffed Colin. "The Gilmores? They came over on the Mayflower. They have more money than you can shake a stick at."

"Ok, we're coming back to the stick comment later," Logan said.

Rory snuck a sideways glance at Logan as they neared the diner. "Well, I didn't really talk to my grandparents a whole lot until high school; my mom raised me on her own away from the family."

"That's right," Logan said, remembering. "The black sheep who managed to escape Hartford society. Remind me later to ask her how she managed that one."

"Well, it's pretty easy from what I hear; just get pregnant and refuse to get married," Rory said wryly. "Then run away. That'll pretty much do it."

"Oh my God," interrupted Colin, "we're in fucking Mayberry. Look, an honest-to-God old-fashioned soda shop! And look, the guy inside looks like he belongs in a freakin' barbershop quartet."

They all stopped and looked in the window as Taylor waved enthusiastically at Rory. Rory gave a half-hearted wave back and pulled the guys along with her to avoid a confrontation.

"What's the rush, Ace?" Logan said, amused.

"You wanted coffee, didn't you? I give you…the world's best coffee!" she said, gesturing to Luke's.

"William's Hardware?" Finn asked, confused.

"No," Rory said slowly, "Luke's Diner." She led the door. "Bar or table?" she asked.

"This is more of a table kind of meeting," Logan said. He scanned the room and selected a four person table, pulling out a chair for Rory.

"What a gentleman," she cooed in a Southern drawl.

"You know, those curtains would make a hell of a dress," Logan replied as they sat down.

"I am offended. I always thought I was more of a Melanie than a Scarlett," she said.

"Oh, I believe you have an inner Scarlett," Logan intimated, "you just need to let her out more often."

Rory didn't know how to respond. Luckily, she didn't have to.

"Hey, Rory!" said Lane perkily, pencil poised to take their orders. "I though you'd be in class."

"Well there's been a change of plans for the day – just for the day, right?" Rory said, suddenly worried. She looked to Logan for confirmation.

"Relax, it's just for the day," Logan said, deciding not to play with her too much.

"Good," said Rory. "Lane, this is Logan, Colin, and Finn," she said, making introductions.

"What's up," said Colin.

"Hello gorgeous," said Finn. "Might you be the bringer of coffee? And your number?"

"You're not a Korean doctor, so you have no chance," Rory said, warning Finn.

"I could be a Korean doctor," he said without blinking an eye.

"That is so impossible on so many levels. Coffee all around, please," Rory said, cutting off any more flirting on Finn's part.

"Ok," Lane said, going back to the counter.

"So," Rory said, "let's get down to business, shall we?" She folded her hands on the table and waited. "Well?"

"Well," Logan said, "as you know, this is for a smaller event. In our little collective we all play equal roles, and the role of event host is a rotating one. We," he said, gesturing to the guys at the table, "are in charge of the junior class event."

"And part of the even takes place here?" Rory said, venturing a guess.

"She's a smart one," said Colin dryly.

"Bingo, love, now tell me more about your friend…" Finn asked as Lane walked over with their coffee.

"I have a boyfriend. Do you want food?" Lane asked without skipping a beat.

Rory looked at everyone else in askance. Logan answered for them. "No thanks, coffee is good for now."

"Ok," Lane said, already taking care of the next customer.

"How cold the wind blows from Korea!" Finn said, taking a sip of coffee. "My God, this is good coffee!"

"It's the _best_ coffee," corrected Rory.

"Well…" Logan said doubtfully.

"What?" Rory said, ready to defend Luke's coffee.

"I mean, you can't very well say it's the _best_ coffee until you've tried _all_ coffee."

"I've had enough coffee to know the good from the bad. Besides, I grew up on Luke's coffee," Rory said.

"But just because you grew up on it doesn't make it the best; in fact, the fact that you were acclimated so young makes it all the more likely that it has the possibility of sucking."

"Luke's coffee does _not_ suck!" Rory exclaimed.

"I didn't say that it sucked, I only said it _could_ suck, and since you have an obvious emotional attachment to it, that only makes you less able to assess its true quality."

Rory just stared.

"Master and Commander, babe," Logan said with a grin. He took a sip of coffee. "This is really good," he said, smirking.

"So if you're done flirting or arguing or whatever the hell you're doing, can we get on with it, please?" asked Colin. "The guy in the corner is starting to freak me out."

Everyone turned to where Colin was looking.

"Oh, don't worry. That's just Kirk," Rory said, returning to her coffee cup.

"Hey, it's Kirk!" Logan said. "Kirk, buddy, care to join us?"

Rory looked flabbergasted as Kirk pulled up a chair.

"How…what…how…" Rory stammered. She pulled herself together. "Ok, I gotta know, how do you two know each other."

"Well, I emailed Kirk when I was checking out Stars Hollow's official web site."

"We have an official web site?" Rory asked, looking at Kirk.

"Why yes, we do," Kirk answered. "I'm the webmaster. I set up a server in my mother's basement, but the town pays for it. She said she wouldn't mind so long as it didn't interfere with her cable television. My mother, not the town."

"Um, ok," Rory said.

"Yeah, so like I was saying, I emailed Kirk when I was looking at the town website. It seemed like the perfect place to host our little… get together, and my man Kirk here seemed to be a great potential facilitator."

"Uh huh," Rory said, taking it all in.

"So…Kirk knows all about – "

"- the surprise birthday party? Yup, he does," Logan said smoothly.

"I have offered my services as Event Coordinator," Kirk said.

"And what does that entail?" Rory asked.

"Well…actually, I'm not sure yet," Kirk admitted. "I am currently awaiting orders from headquarters."

"Headquarters?" Rory asked with raised eyebrows.

"He means us, Ace," Logan clarified with a wry grin.

"Code names! Cool! Can I have one?" Kirk asked.

"Well…" Logan said, thinking.

"I've got one for ya!" Colin piped up.

"Um, maybe you better tell me about the event," Rory interrupted.

"Ok. So here's the plan," Logan said with a smile. "We are doing a scavenger hunt," he explained.

"A scavenger hunt? In Stars Hollow? Doesn't sound like it's on the same level as all your other extravagant events," Rory said.

"Well, it's a regional scavenger hunt," Colin said.

"Regional?" questioned Rory. "Regional as in Connecticut or regional as in the planet Earth?"

"Regional as in the Northeast. Canada is off-limits, as is anything south of Maryland and west of Pennsylvania," Logan said.

"Oh well done, mate! Going cow tipping, are we?" Finn asked hopefully.

"Not exactly," Logan said. "We have to find a difficult task for each location we pick, and the locations aren't necessarily going to be the big cities."

"I see," Rory said. "So Stars Hollow is where you will…" she purposefully trailed off, waiting for Logan to fill in the blank.

"Well, that's where you come in, Ace. And you too, Kirk," Logan said, including Kirk.

"We choose the task?" Rory asked incredulously.

"Well, not choose so much as suggest and facilitate," Logan said.

"Well, I just don't know how you're going to do anything without Taylor's approval," Rory said, shaking her head.

"Taylor Doose, right?" Logan asked, remembering the website.

"Yes, we'll need to run our plans by Taylor," added Kirk.

"Well, Taylor doesn't have to know _everything,_" suggested Logan.

"Are you kidding me?" Rory said. "He's watching us through that window right now," she said, pointing with her thumb.

The whole table looked through the picture window between Luke's and the Soda Shop. Sure enough, there was Taylor, looking concerned and then pretending to go about his business when he saw them staring back.

"So what?" Colin said with a shrug.

"Taylor practically runs the town. You don't understand. When people say they're fighting against The Man, he's The Man," Rory explained.

"Well if he's the man, it should be no problem," joked Logan. "Well we'll just keep things quiet," he continued. "Grease a few palms."

"Wait, are you saying you intend to bribe town officials?" Kirk said.

"No, Kirk, pretty much just you," Logan said.

"I see." Kirk reconsidered his impending opposition. "Carry on."

Rory sighed, obviously forcing patience. "Ok, so what did you have in mind for this stop on your-" Rory used air quotes, " 'regional' scavenger hunt?"

"Some simple little task. Something impossible to steal, something crazy to do, something ridiculous."

"Ridiculous we have," Rory said dryly. "But I do not want you going around town pranking people or stealing anything."

"Relax, ok? No one's gonna get punk'd, and if we steal anything, we're certainly going to return it," Logan assured her.

Rory sat back with her arms folded, a frown on her face.

"I am willing to run interference on this operation – for a small fee, of course. But if you'll excuse me, I have to rendezvous at the previously appointed location for comestibles with a certain party," Kirk said, getting up from the table and leaving the restaurant.

"What was that all about?" Colin asked, confused.

"He had to go home for lunch with his girlfriend," Rory explained, picking at her nails.

Logan's cell phone rang. He flipped it open and answered. "Hello?"

"No!" Rory said, making a slashing motion across her throat.

"Hold on," Logan said, holding his hand over the speaker. "What?"

Rory pointed to the sign. "No cell phones!"

"Seriously?" Logan asked. "It's freezing outside!"

"Seriously!" Rory answered. "Luke will kill you. Go outside!"

"Ok, ok," Logan said, grabbing his coat walking out the door.

"So I have to be a Korean doctor?" said Finn randomly.

Rory and Colin just looked at him, then began to laugh. "Lane," she called, "I think we're going to need some menus over here," she said with a gleam in her eye.

"God bless you," Finn said.

* * *

Logan was aimlessly pacing the sidewalk in front of Luke's as he talked. He only noticed Dean's presence when Dean was standing there in a hard hat, staring at him. 

"Um, listen, I'll call you back. Ok, later," he said, flipping closed the phone. "Nice to see you again," he offered. Dean just snorted. "Um…" Logan said, looking around. "Can I help you?"

"Just don't tell me you're here to work on scenes from Romeo and Juliet," Dean said with a humorless laugh.

"Excuse me?" Logan asked, confused.

"Nevermind," Dean said. They stood in silence for a moment.

"So, you come to visit Rory?" Dean said sarcastically.

Logan evaluated Dean before speaking. "Look, no offense to your girlfriend or whatever, but it's not what you think, ok? I mean, don't get me wrong, Rory is a great girl, but she's…" Logan paused, searching for the right words... "she's a girlfriend kind of girl."

"And that's not your kind of girl?" Dean asked.

"Not really, man, no," Logan replied. "So don't worry, Chachi; Joanie's all yours," he said with a smirk.

"Gee, thanks. Nice to know she's not your type," Dean said.

"Well…" Logan said, "I wouldn't exactly say that." Dean looked at him incredulously, but Logan just continued. "I mean, she's smart and funny and beautiful, and surprises you constantly with how willing she is to just take an adventure…" Logan realized Dean had a murderous glint in his eyes. "But, hey, like you say…she's not really my type," he said casually. "Right?"

"Right," Dean said warily.

"Listen, you wanna join us? I think we're upgrading our coffee to lunch," Logan offered.

"No, I've got to get to work," Dean said, adjusting his hat.

"Right. See ya 'round, sport," Logan said.

"Yeah…see ya," Dean said. He walked away without a backward glance.

Logan glanced through the window at Rory talking and laughing with his friends. He rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "Nah," he said to himself. "Not my type," he said, trying to convince himself. He straightened his coat and went back into Luke's.

* * *

Phew! That was a long one. Next chapter: more fun Lorelai conversations, and a surprising turn of events. Perhaps a breakup on the horizon? Oh yes, and please leave reviews! I love them! Especially looooong ones! 


	4. Snow Ain't So Bad

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right**

**

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Here comes the breakup! Lookout!

* * *

CHAPTER 4: SNOW AIN'T SO BAD

* * *

Rory and Lorelai walked to Luke's Diner. 

"Geez, it's cold outside," Lorelai said, wrapping her coat around her. "It has to be like thirty two degrees out."

"Yes, or at least zero degrees Celsius," Rory replied sensibly.

"Exactly! And you know what that means," Lorelai said with a twinkle in her eye.

"What?"

"Snow!" she trilled.

"Snow? Do you know what you need in order for it to snow?" Rory said, stopping, her arms folded across her chest.

"Well, the thirty two degrees is a good start," Lorelai said, opening the diner door.

"Precipitation!" Rory said.

"Ah hah, but did you listen to the weather report?" Lorelai countered.

"Yes, it said clear skies, low of 28," Rory said with a satisfactory smile, sitting down.

"Exactly!" Lorelai said, joining her at the table.

"Exactly what?" Rory said with a frown.

"They're never right!" Lorelai pointed out.

"Good grief."

"I smell snow, I tell you," Lorelai insisted.

"No, what you smell is chili fries."

"Uh uh. _Snow_. It's in the air, my friend."

Luke walked up and poured two cups of coffee.

"Luke, you believe that I smell snow, right?" Lorelai said, batting her eyes. Rory simply shook her head.

"Snow doesn't have a smell unless it's yellow snow, and you do know not to eat the yellow snow, right?"

"Yes," she said slowly, "I also know that gum on the street is not free candy and a peep show is not letting you look at presents before Christmas, but that's not the point."

"Huh?" Luke said, raising an eyebrow.

"Ok," Lorelai said authoritatively, "Elf is officially added to our Christmas Movie Marathon," Lorelai said.

"Fine," Luke said, returning to the counter.

"Anyway," Lorelai said, getting back to the matter at hand, "everyone has special talents. Milli Vanilli could lip synch, the Supernanny can make children behave, and _I_ can predict snow," she said triumphantly.

"Ladies and gentlemen, my mother, the Punxsutawney Phil of snow," Rory said.

"You know what happens when it snows, Rory."

"Yes yes yes. Good things happen."

"No, _great_ things happen," Lorelai corrected.

"Maybe I'll get all A's on my exams," offered Rory.

Lorelai scoffed. "That's a given."

Rory thought a moment, then nodded her assent.

"But," Lorelai said, "snow is a time for great things," she finished confidently.

"We'll see," Rory said dubiously.

"So what's on the agenda for today?" Lorelai asked, sipping her coffee.

"Well, now that exams are officially over, I'm going to pack up the necessary items from my dorm and bring it all back here. Oh, but first, Dean and I are going to exchange our Christmas presents."

"Why aren't you exchanging them on Christmas Day?" Lorelai asked.

"He's going to Chicago for the holidays with his family," Rory explained.

"Ah," Lorelai said. "So…"

"So…what?" Rory asked.

"How's that going?" Lorelai asked.

"How's what going?" Rory said.

"Dean."

"Um, he's fine, I guess," Rory said.

"I mean you and Dean," Lorelai said.

"Oh. Well, I guess we're ok. Though…nevermind," Rory said.

"No, no, I want to hear, really," Lorelai said encouragingly.

"Well, it's just that it's not like it used to be, you know?" Rory said simply.

"Well…actually, I don't know. What do you mean, hon?" Lorelai said.

"I don't know how to explain it. It's just… Dean is great, you know? But the spark… I don't know. We used to have so much fun, but now it feels like we're forcing it. And he gets so much more jealous than he used to be," Rory said.

"Aw, honey, no. Dean was always jealous," Lorelai said.

Rory thought about it. "I guess that's true…he just wasn't always _this_ jealous. I mean, he definitely hates Logan's guts, and he scared poor Marty half to death!"

"Aw! Poor Naked Guy!" Lorelai said.

"Ok, you really have to start calling him Marty now. It's been over a year since the whole naked debacle," Rory said with a grin.

"Ok, ok, but he'll always be Naked Guy to me," Lorelai acquiesced. "Wait, why would he hate Logan? I didn't think you guys were even friends. I thought you hated him and all those other stupid over privileged trust fund kids."

"I don't hate him!" Rory said quickly. She backed down after seeing Lorelai's shocked face. "I mean, I might have given that impression, but he's not all bad. Definitely arrogant and full of himself, but damn him if he doesn't have the talent to back it up. Did you know that he hardly ever actually writes for the Yale Daily News, yet he can write better than me?"

"Hey, nobody writes better than you!" protested Lorelai.

"Says the woman who birthed me," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

"So I would know. So continue; tell me more about Wonder Boy," Lorelai said.

"He's not Wonder Boy, and I suggest you not over-inflate his ego or else it might burst," Rory said dryly.

"Ah, there's the sardonic girl I know and love," Lorelai said. "So back to Dean. Maybe you just need to try new things instead of glamorizing the 'good ole days.'"

"What do you mean?" Rory asked with interest.

"Well, hasn't Grandma been dropping boulder-sized hints about attending that DAR New Year's Eve Ball?" Lorelai said.

"Yeah, but I don't see what that has to do with my relationship with Dean," Rory said.

"Well, why don't you ask Dean to accompany you to the Ball? It will be an exciting evening, and if nothing else, you can drink yourself to oblivion and viciously mock everyone else in attendance," Lorelai suggested.

"I guess we could…hey, wait a minute," Rory said suspiciously. "Grandma roped you into it, didn't she?"

"Yes! Ok, I admit it," Lorelai said dramatically. "But you have to go. Who is Luke going to talk to when I'm in the bathroom?"

"I don't know, cuz don't we girls always go to the bathroom in packs?" Rory said.

"True, but he could talk to Dean," Lorelai said.

"Um, aren't you forgetting that Luke doesn't like Dean?" Rory said.

"Luke doesn't not-like Dean," Lorelai said wide-eyed.

"Oh, please!" Rory said. "He nearly brained him with the Bop-It."

"Ok, but that was just the one time! He's been nicer ever since," Lorelai said.

Rory just shook her head and smiled.

"So?" Lorelai asked.

"So what?" Rory said.

"You know what!" Lorelai said impatiently.

"You know we're going to have to show him Neil Young in a tux again, right?" Rory said.

"Yes! Haha!" Lorelai cheered. "Show him we shall, my dear, show him we shall."

* * *

"Awesome, Rory, thanks!" Dean said, hugging Rory after she gave him his Christmas present. They were sitting in the gazebo. 

"Well, I knew you wanted one of those, and with your new apartment and all, I just figured you needed one," she said.

"Absolutely. This was just what I needed, thanks. Now, open yours," Dean said.

"Ok," Rory said. She tore open the wrapping paper around the small box. Her heart fluttered, wondering what kind of jewelry lay within. She was surprised at the actual contents.

"Oh, thanks!" she said, faking enthusiasm.

"I figured, hey, I don't know what books you have, and you love books, so this way you can get exactly what you want!" Dean said excitedly.

"No, this is really great!" she said, bobbing her head. A $25 gift certificate to Barnes and Noble wasn't exactly what she was expecting.

"So, ready to go?" Dean said, standing up. Rory stood up too, brushing off the back of her jeans.

"Yup. Let's get me all moved out!" Rory said as they walked to Dean's truck.

"Ah, dorm sweet dorm," Rory said, unlocking the door. It was uncommonly quiet. "Wow, looks like Paris has cleared out."

"I knew it was too quiet," Dean said, smiling. Rory laughed as they walked into her room. "Did she leave you a note or something?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" Rory said, curious.

"Well, there's an envelope here, and something that looks like a present," Dean pointed out.

Rory glanced at her desk. "Huh. That's weird, we already exchanged gifts," she said, picking up the box. She set it down, opening the envelope first.

"I'm gonna load up these first few boxes, ok?" Dean said, grabbing some file boxes.

"Ok," Rory said distractedly. Dean left the room as Rory began to read the note.

_Ace,_

_Thanks for all your help planning the scavenger hunt. It's gonna be great. Have a good break, you deserve it._

_Merry Christmas from your 'boyfriend,'_

_Logan_

_P.S. This is for your inner Scarlett._

Rory's pulse raced. She dropped the card and slowly unwrapped the present, finding a blue Tiffany box. She opened the box and gasped. Inside was a pair of gorgeous diamond chandelier earrings. Rory heard Dean coming back through the common room and shoved the box and envelope in her coat pocket.

"What's next?" Dean asked, slightly out of breath.

"Um, that one," Rory said, pointing to a suitcase. She stood up, awkwardly stuffing her hands in her pockets. She rotated the Tiffany box over and over in her hand in the pocket.

"Hey, Dean?" she said, following him and locking the door.

"Yeah?" Dean grunted.

"Um, are you going to be back by New Year's Eve?" she asked.

"Yeah; actually, I wanted to talk to you about that," Dean said, throwing Rory's last suitcase in his truck.

"Oh really?" Rory said, climbing into the passenger's seat.

"Yeah. Kyle's supposedly throwing this rager party. Wanna go?" asked Dean, turning the car on.

"Oh, well, um, we could do that," Rory said hesitantly.

Dean glanced at Rory. "What, do you not want to go?"

"No, I mean, it could be fun, it's just that Grandma wants me to go to this charity ball. Well, wants us," she amended.

"She wants me to come too?" Dean said incredulously.

"Well, she's already made my mom promise to go, and Luke will be there too, so it's not like we won't know anyone. But yeah, she's been pressuring me to go, and, I dunno, I thought it might be fun," Rory concluded weakly.

"Will I have to wear a tux?" Dean asked.

"Probably," Rory replied. "I think it would be good for us, though, you know? A change of scenery might do us some good," she said half-heartedly.

Dean sighed. "Ok, but I'm gonna need to see something better than Neil Young in a tux," he said.

"I think that can be arranged," Rory said with a small smile.

* * *

"I can't believe you talked me into this," Luke said, adjusting his tie. Luke, Lorelai, Rory, and Dean were standing near the ballroom entrance at the DAR New Year's Eve Ball. They surveyed the room; it was teeming with ladies and gentlemen in ballgowns and tuxedos. The room was lavishly decorated for New Year's Eve, and waiters navigated the crowds dispensing hors d'oeuvres and drinks. 

"Lorelai! Rory! There you are," Emily said, walking over to greet them.

"Hey, Mom," Lorelai said. "You remember Luke, right?"

"Of course I remember Luke," Emily said indignantly. "How are you, Luke?" she said.

"Oh fine, Mrs. Gilmore – I mean, Emily," Luke said uncomfortably.

"And Dean, you remember Dean," prompted Lorelai.

"Hello Dean," Emily said shortly. "Honestly, Lorelai, you'd think I have Alzheimer's the way you carry on."

"Everything looks great, Grandma," Rory said, looking around the ballroom.

"Yes, well, we had a devil of a time reserving the entire resort for the night. But luckily Cindy's cousin works here, so they even managed to get the private beach reserved. Oh dear, there's Marlene, excuse me, we need to talk about these hors d'oeuvres, they're ridiculous!" Emily said, flitting off.

"Drinks?" Luke said.

"Thought you'd never ask," Lorelai said. Luke went off to find the bar. The other three walked inside, finding a spot to stand.

"So," Lorelai said, turning to Rory. "Don't you look all prettified," she said, looking Rory up and down. Rory looked down at her dress. It was a sleeveless wide-strap satin blood red dress with a ruched bodice and an A-line floor-length skirt.

"Yeah, she looks great, doesn't she?" Dean commented, awkwardly adjusting his tuxedo jacket.

"Well, it _is_ a ball," Rory said.

"I know, but still!" Lorelai said. "Where did you get these fancy doo-dads?"

"Well, Grandma arranged a meeting with Miss Celine and this is the finished product," Rory said, striking a pose.

"Nice!" Lorelai said.

"Yeah, apparently this is a Vera Wang," Rory said loftily.

"Vera nice!" Lorelai quipped.

"Hey, I'm gonna go get a drink too," Dean interjected. "You want anything, Rory?"

"No, I'm fine, thanks," she replied.

"Ok. Be right back," Dean said, heading to the bar.

"So! Did Miss Celine jewelify you too?" Lorelai asked.

Rory reached up and fingered one of her earrings – she was wearing Logan's earrings. "No, no, these are mine."

"Reeeeally," Lorelai said skeptically. "Because they look suspiciously like a copy of the ones I circled in the Tiffany & Co. catalogue. Which, by the way, we still get three of."

"You circled earrings in a Tiffany catalogue?" Rory asked dubiously. "Why would you think Luke would ever buy you those earrings?"

"Hey! He bought me earrings once… well, sort of," Lorelai said defensively.

"But not diamonds," Rory pointed out.

"He could – hey, listen, we're talkin' about you, kiddo. That Yale is making you too smart," Lorelai said.

"What can I say? You raised me brainy," Rory said.

"No, I raised you on junk food and pop culture. Now back to the earrings. Are those the Tiffany knockoffs?" Lorelai asked, hand on hip.

"Not exactly…" Rory said. "They were a gift…from a friend."

"No way!" breathed Lorelai. "I want friends like that. Who's your friend?"

"Oh," Rory said, waving the comment away, "just someone."

"Who?" persisted Lorelai.

"Logan, ok? But it's not really a big deal," Rory said quickly.

"Not a big deal? Right,'cause, you know, who doesn't give jewelry to casual acquaintances?" Lorelai said flippantly. "Unless," she said, looking at Rory carefully, "you're more than casual acquaintances."

"Oh please," Rory said. "He's not – I mean, we're not – I mean… is it hot in here to you?" Rory said. "I need a drink. Do you want a drink?"

"No," Lorelai said slowly. "Luke's getting them, remember?"

"Right, right," Rory said. She ran her fingers through her curled hair.

* * *

Across the room, Logan and his friends were plotting the sub-party. 

"So I'm thinking the beach, what d'you reckon?" Finn suggested.

"Could work," Logan said.

"Or…the casino!" Colin offered.

"Oh, well done!" Finn said.

"So it's settled," Logan said. "Right after midnight, we peace out."

"Oh, put a lid on it, here comes your mom," warned Colin.

"Oh man," Logan said.

"Logan, darling! There you are! We were hoping for a quick family photo, do you mind?" Shira said.

"Of course not," Logan said diplomatically. "Gentlemen, if you'll excuse me."

"Come on, Finn. I believe I see a redhead due north," Colin said.

"Brilliant. Off we go!" Finn replied.

"So, who are you here with, Logan?" Shira asked nonchalantly.

"I'm goin' stag, Mom. Just me and the boys," Logan replied. Shira raised her eyebrows. "_But_ there may be a larger crowd come midnight, we'll see," Logan amended.

"Ah hah," she said knowingly. "Oh look," she said, pointing across the room. "There's Emily's daughter. I'm surprised she's here; she usually avoids these things like the plague," she said.

Logan looked where she was pointing. There was Lorelai in animated conversation with Rory.

"I assume that's the child," Shira said snobbily.

" 'The child,' Mother?" Logan said wryly.

"Yes. Oh, I don't remember her name, but Emily says she means to be a world-famous journalist," Shira remarked.

"Something like that," Logan said.

"You know her?" Shira asked.

"Yes; Rory's on the newspaper. She's a… friend," Logan said.

"Ah," Shira said, eyeing Logan carefully. "Well, as long as that's all she is."

"Excuse me?" Logan said with surprise.

"Oh Logan, please!" Shira laughed. "You can't seriously want to date her. She is not the girl for you," she said condescendingly.

"Why exactly is that?" Logan said, iron in his voice.

"Oh, you sound just like your father," Shira said. "It's just that you know her mother had her out of wedlock, first of all, the Gilmore name isn't enough to ignore that. Secondly, she has her heart set on a career. She's completely ignoring any real-life education. She's a rebel like her mother; she's not in the DAR and definitely not in a position to do any of the things that society wives need to know how to do."

"Harsh, Mom," Logan said.

"Well, darling, it's just the truth! I don't _mean_ anything by it," Shira said flippantly. "Oh look, here's your father and Honor. Picture time!" she trilled.

Logan bit back a reply and smiled for the camera.

"Lovely, thank you," Shira said.

"I'm going to the restroom. Be back before midnight," Mitchum said, kissing Shira's cheek.

"You'd better!" she called after him. "Well, speak of the devil, here come Emily and Richard.

"Logan, my boy, how are you?" Richard said, fervently shaking Logan's hand.

"Fine, sir, fine. And yourself?" Logan said with a smile.

"Right as rain," Richard replied heartily.

"Emily, darling, how are you?" Shira.

"Fine," Emily said politely. "And you, Shira?"

"Oh, we're simply having a marvelous time," Shira gushed. "In fact," she said with a gleam in her eye, "we were just talking about your granddaughter."

Logan gave his mother a warning glance.

"Oh really?" Richard said with interest.

"Yes. Logan was just telling me what great friends they were," Shira said sweetly.

"Well Rory actually came with us tonight; they're here somewhere," Emily said, searching the room.

"I believe I see her," Logan said, gesturing with his drink. "Shall we go say hello, Richard, and leave these ladies to gossip?" he said with a winning smile and a challenging glance to his mother.

"By all means, young man, by all means," Richard said. He shared an excited glance with Emily before heading toward Lorelai and Rory.

"Uh oh," Lorelai said.

"What?" Rory asked.

"Hey," Dean said, walking up. "I missed Luke at the bar, but I brought you a ginger ale," he said, offering Rory a drink.

"Wow, Dean, that better not be spiked," Lorelai joked.

"Huh?" he said confused.

"Thanks for the drink," Rory said, ignoring Lorelai. She took a sip. "So what's with the 'uh oh,' Mom?"

"Oh, nothing," she said. "I just…um…"

"Lorelai, Rory!" boomed Richard. "Look who I found!"

"The last of the blond bombshells?" Lorelai offered.

"No," Richard said patiently, "I found your friend, Rory. Lorelai, this is Logan Huntzberger. Logan, this is my daughter and Rory's mother."

"Nice to finally meet you," Logan said with a wink.

"Charmer," Lorelai said, shaking his hand.

Dean cleared his throat.

"And Dean, Dad, you need to introduce Dean," Lorelai said pointedly.

"We've met," Logan said smoothly. Lorelai raised her eyebrows at Rory but said nothing. "So, Ace, I see you got my Christmas present. They suit you," he said with a smirk.

"Excuse me?" Dean said in agitated confusion.

"Would you like to dance, Lorelai?" Richard interrupted.

"Um, sure. Ok," Lorelai said, shooting a helpless glance at Rory.

"And Logan," Richard said, "why don't you take Rory for a spin around the floor?"

"I'd be delighted, Richard." He offered his arm to Rory who hesitantly took it.

"You don't mind, do you, Dean?" Richard said. Dean started to protest. "That's a good lad. Let's go, Lorelai," he said, leading her onto the dance floor.

"But – ok," Lorelai stuttered.

"Shall we?" Logan said.

Rory let him lead her onto the dance floor. "Well, that was subtle as a brick," she said sarcastically.

"Why, whatever do you mean?" Logan said, laughing as they danced to the fast song. He twirled her out.

"Oh please!" she said, twirling back into his arms. "Why don't they just say it; Rory, we don't like Dean, we actually wish you would go marry Logan. Is that ok with you?" she fumed.

"Ok, let's change the subject, shall we?" Logan said.

Rory harrumphed.

"Let's start with that dress," Logan said.

"Yes, well, I tried to fashion one out of Luke's curtains, but it proved too difficult, so this had to do."

"Well it does very well, Ace, very well indeed," he said, dipping her.

"Well, I had to do the earrings justice," she said, blushing.

"Ah, I see," Logan said. The next song was slower, and he pulled Rory a bit closer. He snuck a glance at the corner where Dean was still standing. If looks could kill, Logan would be dead on the spot. "I don't think your boyfriend likes me very much," he said into Rory's ear.

"Oh really?" she said in false innocence. "What gives you that idea?"

"It's ok, though, I don't mind," Logan said nonchalantly.

"Really?" Rory said, interested.

"Nope. I enjoy a challenge. Do you know, my mother is dead set against us dating," he said casually.

"Is she now," Rory said, amused.

"Yep. It seems that you are not Huntzberger wife material."

"Oh yeah?" Rory said, beginning to get angry. She immediately checked herself. "Well, I suppose it's a good thing we're not dating," she said with a pretty smile.

"I suppose it is," Logan said. Suddenly, the crowd began to swell toward the back of the ballroom. "Wow, the countdown begins! Midnight came fast," Logan said as they got caught up in the crowd.

"Why is everybody pushing to the back?" Rory said.

"Fireworks, Ace!" Logan said, grabbing two flutes of champagne.

"Logan!" cried Finn. "We've been looking for you, mate!" Colin and Finn were squeezed up next to Logan and Rory, with two girls in tow.

"You remember Stephanie, right Rory?" said Colin.

"Yeah, nice to see you again," Rory said over the din.

:"And this is the elusive Rosemary, who is taking pity on me for New Year," Finn said, squeezing the girl he had his arm around.

"Hi," said Rory.

The crowd started to count down the final ten seconds.

Rory suddenly began to panic. "I need to find Dean," she yelled above the roar. She scanned the crowd but couldn't see Dean.

"What?" shouted Logan.

"I need to find Dean!" Rory shouted.

"It's impossible in this crowd! Forget about it," Logan shouted.

Rory sighed.

"5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Happy New Year!" the crowd chorused. Rory and Logan and the whole crew toasted, clinking their glasses and downing the contents, setting the flutes on a nearby tray.

"Happy New Year!" Finn said, kissing Rosemary, then Stephanie. "Come on, reporter girl, give us a kiss," Finn said. Rory grinned and obliged as Colin and Logan kissed the other girls. "God I love midnight," Finn said.

"Happy New Year, Colin," Rory said, briefly kissing Colin as well. She didn't see Dean fighting his way through the crowd to get to her.

"Happy New Year, Ace," Logan said, putting his arms around her waist.

"Happy New Year, Logan," Rory replied, staring into his eyes. She placed her hands on his arms as he bent down to kiss her. Logan's kiss, however, wasn't as brief as his friends'. To Rory, it seemed to last forever. When he finally pulled away, Finn and Colin were issuing catcalls.

"Get a room, mate!" Finn said.

"Oh come on, man, it's tradition," Logan said, his arms still around Rory's waist. Rory just blushed and ran her fingers through her hair.

"Well, tradition or no tradition, that was one hell of a kiss," Colin said.

"It sure was," Dean said.

"Dean!" Rory exclaimed. Logan smoothly dropped his arms back to his sides.

"Hey, look, it's Mr. Tall, Dark and…no, just tall and dark," Colin said.

"Don't be an ass, Colin," Logan said, his eyes locked with Dean's.

"We need to talk, Rory. Outside," Dean said, grabbing Rory's hand and pulling her out onto the beach. As soon as they were out of hearing range, Dean dropped Rory's hand. She folded her arms across her chest in the cold night.

"What the hell was that? And don't say I'm overreacting, because I'm not. I'm really looking forward to your explanation here," Dean said.

"Dean, come on," Rory said uncomfortably.

"What, Rory?" Dean said angrily.

"Look, I tried to find you, but the crowd was too tight," she said.

"Funny; I managed to find you," Dean said, tight-lipped.

"It's New Year's Eve! That's what you do at midnight! Everyone had champagne and then we all kissed each other; it's no big deal!" Rory said.

"No big deal? No big deal? I saw the way he was looking at you, Rory."

"What way? What do you mean?" Rory demanded.

"Oh _come on_, Rory. He is so into you. And you're into him. I saw the way you looked at him."

"What way? There was no way!"

"I'm not an idiot, Rory. I mean, I should have seen this coming."

"I don't understand," Rory said, beginning to cry.

"Please. Jess? Or Tristan, even? I mean, this guy is like a second chance with that punk. He could be Tristan's clone."

"I don't know what you're talking about," she scoffed. "I swear, we haven't done _anything_," Rory insisted.

"Can you swear you haven't slept with him?" Dean said.

"Yes!" Rory said in shock. "This is ridiculous, Dean. Do you seriously think I would cheat on you?"

"Well, you cheated _with_ me, so yeah, I'd say it's within the realm of possibility."

They were at a stalemate. Rory was shocked that he brought up the circumstances of their first night together.

"This isn't going to work, is it," Rory said quietly.

Dean started to speak, then stopped. "No, I guess it isn't," he said sadly.

"Look, I - " he reached out, but stopped short of touching her. "I'm just gonna go, ok?"

"Fine," she said, looking away.

She watched Dean walk back into the party without a backward glance. At that moment, it began to snow.

* * *

Logan watched Rory from the window of the party. 

"Do you think she's ok?" asked Stephanie.

"I don't know," Logan said thoughtfully.

"Hm. So; casino sound good to everyone?" Colin suggested.

"Yes, brilliant, let's go," Finn said. "Am I drunk yet?"

"Not yet," Rosemary said.

"Dear, oh dear! We need to remedy that. Here, waiter, bottle of champagne, if you please," Finn said, grabbing a bottle from the nearby waiter.

"I'll catch up with you guys in a minute," Logan said, still staring out the window.

"You sure?" Colin said.

"Come on, Colin," Stephanie said, "let's go. He's hooked and needs to get her out of his system," she said with a knowing look.

"What?" Logan said, pulling himself away from the window. "What, that?" he said, pointing outside. "I'm just concerned, that's all. She seems a little fragile."

"Who, reporter girl?" Finn said. "Nah. She seems made of iron, mate."

"Well, still," Logan said.

Finn grinned. "Man, she got to you, didn't she?"

"No," Logan said defensively. His friends just looked at him. "Maybe," he allowed.

They stared until Stephanie started giggling.

"Shut up," Logan said with a smile.

"What? I said nothing!" Stephanie protested. "Well if you're going to yell at me anyway: you liiiiike her. You think she's seeexy, you wanna kiiiss her, hug her and daaate her," said Stephanie in a singsong voice.

"Fuck off, the lot of you," Logan said good-humoredly. "I'll meet you in the casino."

"See; told you so," Stephanie said, elbowing Colin.

"Ouch! Did I say anything? No!" Colin said, rubbing his side.

"Let's go, let's go!" Finn whined.

"Alright, come on," said Rosemary. They waved to Logan as they navigated the crowd and headed to the door.

Logan took one more look out the window and made his way to the beach.

* * *

"Great. Just great," Rory said, looking up at the sky. "Snow. Of course, snow," she said ironically. She started to cry harder. 

"Whoa there, Ace, you ok?" Logan asked, slowly walking up to her.

Rory turned around to look at him. "Is my mascara running?"

"What?" Logan said, confused.

"'Cause usually in situations like this, mascara tends to run, and it's never in a straight line, have you ever noticed that?" Rory said, trying desperately to regain control.

"Um, not really, no," Logan said awkwardly.

Rory turned back to the sea. "Snow can kiss my ass," she said bitingly, kicking the sand in front of her.

"Ah. So snow has pissed you off to the point of crying, is that it?" Logan said with a smirk. "I'd hate to see you when it hails."

"No," Rory said, sniffing. "It was Dean. We had a fight…and…and I think it's over."

"Ah," Logan said. "Well, he's just excess baggage, Rory. Dump his ass and get on with your life. It'll be ok."

"No, it won't be ok. You don't understand," Rory insisted.

"Ace, I understand plenty. You're just too afraid to let go," he said reasonably.

Rory snapped. "You know what? You're right, ok? I am afraid to let go because Dean is the only person who was there for me, always. He was my first boyfriend, my first kiss, my first…" Rory choked up. "My first everything."

Logan didn't know how to respond.

"Besides, what do you care," she said grumpily. "God, this is embarrassing," said Rory.

"What? It's not that bad," Logan said quizzically.

"No! I mean, I just got dumped, and here you are being nice to me. You don't need to be nice to me."

"I can be nice," Logan chided. He chose his words carefully. "It's hard to let go from your first love."

"Yeah," Rory almost whispered.

Logan rubbed his hands together. "So, what do you say we go back inside. Finn is known for his one-man renditions of movies, and I'll bet he's just now getting drunk enough to offer us a selection," he said with a smile.

Rory didn't reply.

"Come on," Logan said. "He's been dyin' to do West Side Story again. The knife fights are the best. And the world doesn't seem quite so bad when he sings 'I Feel Pretty.'"

Rory almost smiled, but wiped an errant tear. "No, I just…I'm not ready to go back in just yet."

"Ok, that's fine. We can stay out here," Logan said.

Rory rubbed her bare arms.

"Here," Logan said, offering her his coat.

"No, you'll freeze in this snow," Rory protested.

"I'm fine, Ace, take it," he insisted, draping it over her shoulders.

"Thanks," she sniffed, pulling it tighter around herself.

"The beach is really pretty at night," she said, trying to have a normal conversation.

"It sure is," Logan said, looking out across the ocean.

Suddenly, Rory began to cry harder. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry," she kept saying. "You don't have to…I'm such a mess."

"Hey, hey, come here," Logan said, gathering Rory in his arms. "Here," he said, pulling a handkerchief out of his coat pocket.

"Wow, these things still come with handkerchiefs? I didn't know anyone used those anymore – well, aside from Grandpa," she said, wiping her eyes and calming down.

"So what with the hating the snow?" Logan asked, holding Rory, her head resting on his shoulder.

"Snow is supposed to be a time for great things. Snow always makes wonderful things happen, but look at tonight! Not so wonderful," she said.

Logan paused while considering his next move. "Well, the night's not over yet."

"What?" Rory mumbled against his shoulder.

"Wonderful things can still happen," Logan whispered in her ear. He slightly pulled away from Rory and slipped his arms around her waist inside his jacket.

"What are you doing?" Rory said dreamily as Logan kissed one, then both her eyelids.

"Trust me?" he said, kissing down her tear-stained cheeks.

"What?" Rory said in a daze, her eyes still closed.

"I said, do you trust me?" Logan repeated.

Rory opened her eyes and looked at him. "You know what? Strangely enough, I think I do."

"Good," Logan said. He looked up. "Hey, it's snowing harder," he said.

"You know, snow ain't so bad," Rory said with a small smile.

"Glad to hear it, Ace, glad to hear it," Logan said, leaning down to kiss her.

* * *

Ta da! Now, this very well could be the end, folks, but I'm not that mean. Tune in next time to see what happens! (Oh, and by the way, the dress and earrings were totally real. You can check Vera Wang's and Tiffany's websites if you want to see them, or you can use your good ol' imagination.) Review pretty please! Especially if you have any scenes that you want to see played out or want to leave feedback on the ones you just witnessed. 


	5. Nick and Nora, Sherlock and Clouseau?

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **I'm constantly surprised at your favorite parts of the chapter; please continue to share them with me. Often, they're bits that I added at the last minute, although some were thought through. Meanwhile, do any of you watch Supernatural, you know, that new show with Jared Padelecki? Do you like his character on the show? Also, I don't watch it, but isn't it confusing that his character's brother's name is Dean? Every time they say Dean on the show, don't you get confused? Why would WB execs allow that to happen? This is a puzzlement. Ooh, and that 'King and I' reference reminds me that I have now instituted my own "Gilmore-isms" for this fic. I try, as you can tell, to stay true to the show as much as possible, and that includes some references that might not be clear to all. I do not claim to be as esoteric as the geniuses that write the episodes, but I do try. Now, on to the drama…you didn't think I would continue this fic without a lil' drama, did ya? (Oh yes, and I'm posting the Gilmore-isms on my profile for easy access. Enjoy!)

* * *

CHAPTER 5: NICK AND NORA, SHERLOCK AND CLOUSEAU?

* * *

Rory and Logan were standing on her porch in Stars Hollow. The moon was especially bright that night, giving Logan a luminous view of Rory, who was feeling rather flustered at the moment. 

"There won't be running, will there?" Rory asked, adjusting her dress.

"Why do you ask?" Logan said mischievously, leaning against the railing.

"Logan!" said Rory. "Running is not a possibility in this dress, much less these shoes!" She looked down at her dress. It was a vintage 1930s sheer silk dress, low cut and pale pink in color. She also had a white fur wrap and vintage shoes to go with it.

"And another question: is this real? Because if so, I need to learn how to pray so I can ask for forgiveness," Rory asked, fingering the wrap.

"Ask me no questions, I'll tell you no lies," Logan said easily.

"I'll pretend I didn't ask," Rory grinned.

"You look great," Logan said, easing off the railing and stepping closer.

"So do you," Rory responded honestly. He was dressed in a tuxedo, as if he was ready for a party, which suited his role perfectly. "You guys continue to amaze me with all these crazy events. Something tells me that you are wearing a tuxedo that is literally from 1934, and I'm not even going to ask you what this dress cost you!"

Logan grinned. "It's no big deal, Ace. It's all in the name of fun. Besides, the mink cost more," he said with a wink. "And by the way, did I tell you you look good? 'Cause you look good," he said, reached over, intending to kiss her.

"Hey!" Rory said, pulling away. "Stay away from the hair. It took Stephanie and me two hours to turn me into Myrna Loy. It was not easy, let me tell you," Rory said, checking her 1930's-inspired tresses.

"Well lucky for you, it's not the hair I'm concerned with," Logan said with a smirk. He pulled her to him and kissed her. Rory leaned into the kiss until a sound at Logan's feet made them pull apart.

"Hey! There you are, buddy!" Logan said, kneeling down to playfully ruffle the dog's hair.

"Why, Asta! We've been looking all over for you! Found any clues?" Rory said, sharing a grin with Logan. 'Asta' just barked.

"So whose are you, really?" Rory asked the dog as Logan stood back up.

"My sister's, so please don't lose it or I'm out three grand," said Colin, walking up in turn of the century clothing, a deerstalker hat perched on his head and a tweed overcoat swinging as he walked.

"Sherlock Holmes, I presume?" Logan said, sticking out his hand.

Colin merely chewed on his pipe and whipped out a magnifying glass to inspect Logan's hand. He swept out his tweed coat. "Clean fingernails, soft hands; you've never done a day of work in your life, have you, Nick?" he said with a ridiculous English accent.

Logan laughed. "Good deduction, my man. You see I have my Nora," Logan paused as Rory gave a slow nod of acknowledgement, "but where's your Doctor Watson?"

"Right here," said Stephanie, walking up, fully dressed in an Englishman's suit. "This is so unfair," she said dramatically.

"What is?" Colin asked, dropping his phony English accent.

"Rory gets to wear fabulous gowns from the 1930s, and I have to be a cross-dresser!" Stephanie pouted.

"Tragic, isn't it?" quipped Logan.

"It is!" Stephanie said seriously. "If she wasn't so sweet, I'd have to hate her," she said.

"Um, thanks, I think," Rory said.

"It's a compliment, trust me," Colin said.

"Is this the rendezvous point?" Robert said, walking up to the group.

"Whoa! Great choice," Colin said. Robert had poofed up his hair and had a very realistic moustache. He also was clad in a bright Hawaiian shirt and very tight pants with a pair of wide sunglasses perched on his head.

"Magnum, P.I., at your service," Robert said.

"Did you see anyone else on your way here?" Logan asked, holding Asta's leash as the dog tried to explore the porch.

"Yeah; Jim and Gary were pulling up. They went with Simon and Simon. I'm also fairly sure I saw Jonah, who, by the way, might be very chemically altered," Robert said.

"What makes you say that?" Rory asked, tilting her head.

"He came as Miss Marple," Robert deadpanned. Everyone laughed.

"Well, let's head to the pre-appointed place, agreed?" Logan suggested.

"Wait – shouldn't we wait for Finn?" Colin said.

"No need, mate, I'm here!" Finn said.

"Oh my Lord," Rory said, barely suppressing her laughter. Finn had a huge false nose and was wearing a trenchcoat, a blow-up parrot perched on his shoulder.

"Ah, Inspector Clouseau, glad you could make it," Logan said.

"Yes. I regret Kato could not accompany me. I told him we did not have enough hrooom," Finn said in his best Peter Sellers' impression.

"Come on, let's go meet Kirk," Logan said, grabbing Rory's hand and leading the group through Rory's backyard and into the woods behind Miss Patty's.

"Kirk really organized this?" Rory asked, running a little bit to keep up with Logan and the dog. "You can't be serious; you _never_ trust Kirk with important things!" she said.

"Don't worry," Logan assured her as the group began to traipse through the woods. "We merely used his intimate knowledge of Stars Hollow to aid us in the placement of the objects. He's basically going to stay at home base and declare the winners."

"Well, ok," Rory said uneasily. "Did I ever tell you about the time that we let Kirk hide the Easter eggs for the annual Easter Egg Hunt?"

"No," Logan replied.

"Yeah, well, he hid them, alright. Except he didn't make a map of where the eggs were, so a few months later, the town began to smell."

"Oh no!" interjected Logan.

"Oh yes," Rory confirmed. "The whole town got together to hunt for the last 12 eggs. I think Kirk eventually found them, but Taylor didn't trust him for a long time." Rory thought for a moment. "You did make sure he knows where everything is, right? I mean, if a group doesn't find their object or whatever, the objects won't be lost indefinitely, will they?"

"Um, _that_ I don't know," Logan said. "If I knew all the details, it wouldn't be fair. Besides, I'm already getting comments on having you on my team. Apparently that gives us a home team advantage."

"Well, Stars Hollow isn't that big. There aren't many secret places that I would know that you guys can't find in a little under ten minutes. Of course, one could say that I have the advantage of knowing Kirk, but that's not an advantage," Rory reasoned.

"And why's that?" Logan asked.

"Because," Rory said simply, "_nobody_ knows what goes on in Kirk's mind."

"Ah," Logan said with a smile. "Say, do you think people in a small town like this will notice a bunch of private detectives running through their city?"

"Well, no, and there are two main reasons," Rory said. "For one, everybody should be in Miss Patty's for the town meeting tonight."

"And the other reason?" Logan queried.

"We're already crazy here; a handful more crazies won't make a difference," she said.

"Ah," Logan said, smiling.

* * *

"Ok, everybody, listen up. Everyone, attention please. Please direct your attention to the podium," Kirk said into his megaphone. The crowd got marginally quieter. "Thank you all for coming tonight. As you know, this is a scavenger hunt. Each team has their own envelope of clues. The envelope contains the first clue that leads you to the next clue, where you'll find another clue that will lead you to the next clue, and so on and so forth," Kirk said authoritatively. "Now, the first group to return with their object wins. The winners get this gold trophy. It's a nice trophy, although not as nice as the many trophies in my own personal collection. I am the reigning champion of the annual Stars Hollow Dance Marathon, a feat not come by lightly. In fact, I remember just last year -" 

Kirk was interrupted by Logan clearing his throat.

"Right," Kirk said. "Well, anyway, when I call out your group name, come get your envelopes and wait for the signal to open them."

Kirk passed out all the envelopes. "On your mark, get set…go!" he shouted.

"What's our first clue?" Rory asked impatiently, holding onto Asta's leash. Logan opened their envelope.

"It says here: 'Your first clue lies high above the troubadour's spot; on the ground it is not.' Man, Kirk here really missed his calling – he's a poet and don't even know it," Logan said with slight sarcasm.

Rory swatted at him. "Be nice. He has so little in his life," she said.

"Hey," Logan protested, "he'll have plenty in his wallet after tonight, so let's not feel too sorry for the guy, ok?"

Rory grinned. "Ok, so let's think: troubadour's spot…um… the troubadour usually performs on the corner of the square next to the gazebo. God, I hope he didn't hide the next clue on top of the gazebo!" Rory said worriedly.

"First things first, Ace. Let's go the square! Lead the way!" Logan said. "Come on, Asta," he said to the dog. Asta barked and started trotting. Rory laughed and grabbed the skirt of her dress as they walked briskly to the town square. They bumped into Finn in the middle of the street as they were crossing to the gazebo.

"Oy, I don't understand this clue," he said, his Kato in tow.

"Hey, no fair, we're not supposed to help each other," Logan pointed out.

"Oh, come on, Logan," Rory protested, "maybe Kirk gave him too hard a clue. What is it, Finn?" she asked.

"Well," he said, squinting at the card, "it says something about everything coming up roses and a toolbox, but every damn house here has a garden!" Finn whined.

Rory thought for a moment. "Of course! Kirk's love of musicals rears its ugly head. Go to Gypsy's; she fixes cars, and I guess look inside her toolbox," she explained.

Finn scratched his head. "Alright, then. Whatever you say, love. Come on, Kato."

"My name's Adam," offered the guy accompanying him.

"Yeah, whatever, come on. Just don't attack me again, got it?" Finn said. 'Adam' shrugged.

The pair left. Rory and Logan shared an amused glance. "Ok, come on," said Logan. "Here's the gazebo. What now?"

"I'm not quite sure," Rory said, looking around. Asta began to bark and paw at the tree with two front paws.

"I guess climb the tree?" Logan suggested.

"Logan, no, you'll ruin your clothes, and is it even safe?" Rory said.

"Don't worry about the clothes, but I'm touched by your concern," Logan said, pulling Rory in for a kiss.

Rory briefly kissed him and then smacked the back of his head.

"Ow! What was that for?" Logan said, rubbing his head.

"Ego," she said simply. "Besides, we have no time for that; we have a trophy to win!"

"Fine, but you better feel damn guilty if I fall out of this tree," Logan said, beginning to climb the tree.

"Do you see anything?" Rory called up to him.

"Not sure yet," came the muffled answer. "Wait – got something. Coming down," Logan said.

"Be careful!" Rory said. "Come here, Asta," she said, kneeling down and hugging the dog.

Logan hopped down the last few feet and brushed himself off. "Phew! I hope they're not all that unreachable," he said.

Rory stood up and threw her arms around his neck, kissing him.

"Not that I'm complaining, but what was that for?" Logan said, settling his arms around her waist.

"For not falling out of the tree," she said, as if it were the most logical thing in the world.

"Well! I should not fall out of trees more often," he said, nuzzling her neck.

Rory laughed. "Ok, the moment's over. What's the clue say?"

Logan reluctantly let go. "Ok. Let's see," he said, opening the envelope. "For your next clue, here's what you do…"

* * *

Five crazy stops later, Rory's feet were hurting. "Ok, stop stop stop," she said, grabbing Logan's shoulder for support while removing her heels. Asta whined. "See? Even Asta's tired!" she complained. 

"Ace, come on!" Logan encouraged. "We gotta be close to the end. Besides, I think there's only one more card. We didn't make too many because Finn's attention span is short."

Rory sighed. "One more?"

"One more," Logan said reassuringly.

"Ok, but there better be coffee soon," Rory grumbled. "What's our clue say again?"

Logan pulled the card from his pocket while Asta whined and sat down, his head on his front paws. Logan rolled his eyes and read the clue: "Almost there, my friend, you're near the end. To find your final clue, look behind the superglue."

"Ok, superglue," Rory said, thinking. "I suppose we should try Doose's Market."

"Will anybody be there?" Logan asked. "I thought everyone was at the town meeting."

"Well most everyone is, but Taylor likes to keep one guy there to keep it open. Apparently he's willing to still take money from those not involved in town events, though he frowns on them," Rory said.

"Let's go, then!" Logan said. Rory and Asta didn't move. "Oh come on, Ace! How are you ever going to be a famous reporter if you can't even make it through one little scavenger hunt?"

"But when I'm a world-famous reporter, I will be wearing sensible shoes," Rory argued.

Logan sighed. "Do you want me to carry you?"

"What?" Rory laughed in surprise.

"Well you can't run around in bare feet, you might step on something sharp, and if you can't walk in your shoes, then I see no other alternative," Logan reasoned.

"This is totally one of those way romantic moments! I need a camera, where's a camera?" Rory said. Logan just gave her a look. "Ok, or no camera, no camera is fine."

"So?" Logan asked.

"Yes, please!" Rory said, preparing for Logan to pick her up. She was unprepared, however, when he bent at the waist and picked her up, slinging her over his shoulder. Asta trotted along behind.

"Logan! Put me down!" Rory shrieked, kicking her feet and holding onto her shoes.

"What? You wanted me to carry you, I'm carrying you," Logan said, walking down the sidewalk.

"I thought you meant like – you know, the traditional kind of carrying, like over-the-threshold kind, like the Clark Gable in Gone with the Wind up-the-staircase kind!" Rory protested, finally stopping her struggle.

"Well, I am doing the Clark Gable kind of carrying; it's just the It Happened One Night kind of carrying," he said reasonably.

"You're impossible!" Rory pouted.

"I've been told," Logan replied. "Doose's Market coming up, watch your head," he warned.

"Logan! You are not going to carry me in there," Rory demanded.

"I beg to differ, Ace," Logan said, opening the door and walking in.

"Logan, please?" Rory pleaded.

"You sure, Ace?" Logan said. "You mean, you _don't_ want me to carry you anymore?"

"You're such an ass," Rory said under her breath.

"What was that?" Logan said, a smirk on his face.

Rory sighed. "No, I don't want you to carry me anymore. I don't know _what_ I was thinking. Now will you put me down, please?"

"Sure," Logan said. "All you had to do was ask," he said, gently setting her back down.

"You're evil," Rory said, hitting Logan on the arm with her shoes.

"Ouch! Boy, Ace, you sure can be violent sometimes," Logan said, rubbing his arm.

"Just think of it as passionate," Rory said sweetly.

"Oh yeah?" Logan said, a gleam in his eye. He grabbed her by the shoulders and attacked her lips. Rory was surprised at first, but then melted into his arms. There was something about Logan that ignited her. Someone cleared their throat behind them and they reluctantly broke apart. Their eyes were still locked together when the person spoke.

"Can I help you?" he said, with steel in his voice.

"Dean!" Rory exclaimed, stepping back and touching her lips. "Um, we were just, um," she stammered.

"Looking for the superglue," finished Logan.

"And you were just checking her tonsils, is that right?" Dean said, enraged.

"Something like that," Logan said easily.

"Aisle 4," Dean said through clenched teeth. Logan smiled his thanks and started to walk to Aisle 4. Rory seemed rooted to the spot.

"Come on, Ace," Logan said quietly, touching her waist and waking her out of her apparent coma.

"Aw, how cute," Dean said sarcastically. "You already have pet names. You sure move fast, don't you, Rory?"

"I…" Rory didn't know what to say. Part of her was angry; after all, _Dean_ dumped _her_! However, it still hurt.

"Hey, listen buddy," Logan said, holding Rory protectively. "We didn't come here to cause a scene, ok? We'll be out of here in a minute."

"Right, because of course you wouldn't expect to find me here, in Stars Hollow," Dean replied sarcastically.

"Not lookin' for a fight, man," Logan said smoothly. Rory looked down at her feet.

"So what, you guys goin' to a costume party with your rich friends?" Dean said snootily.

"Not really at liberty to say," Logan said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes. "Look, Rory, why don't you get what we need and I'll meet you outside," Logan said.

"Ok…" Rory said slowly.

"Dean, how about we have a little chat?" Logan said, gesturing to the door.

"Fine," Dean said.

Rory slipped her shoes back on and went to find the next clue card amid the superglue, wondering what words were transpiring between Logan and Dean.

* * *

Outside, they were having quite the discussion. 

"So, you here to tell me that this is all in my head? That you're just friends? Well I don't buy that, and I don't appreciate you sleeping with my girlfriend," Dean said, before Logan had a chance to say anything. Neither of them noticed that the town meeting was slowly trickling out… right down the sidewalk in front of Doose's Market.

"Look, what Rory and I do is none of your business. In case you've forgotten, you dumped her, remember?" Logan said. "She is no longer your girlfriend."

"Yeah, for now," Dean snorted. Quite a crowd was gathering.

"What does _that_ mean?" Logan said.

Dean smiled menacingly. "That means that she may have these flings with other guys, but she _always_ comes back to me. In the end, Rory knows that she wants me," he said arrogantly.

"Sorry to disappoint you, but somehow I don't think that's how it works anymore," Logan said. Rory came outside, the clue in her hand. Asta barked at Dean as the crowd grew, with some LDB members interspersed.

"We'll see," Dean said, seeing Rory over Logan's shoulder. "Tell you what, when you're done fucking her, you send her back to me, ok, Richie Rich?"

"Dean!" screamed Rory in shock and outrage. Logan lunged for Dean, who had a 'bring it on' attitude. They each landed a few good punches before there were suddenly more people involved.

"Ok, break it up guys, cool down, I mean it," Luke said, thrusting himself between the two. Finn, Colin, and Robert rushed over to pull Logan off Dean, and Kyle and Luke were dragging Dean away from Logan.

"I'm ok, it's cool," Dean kept insisting. He shrugged off the guys and adjusted the Doose's apron.

Logan, however, was having a harder time getting rid of his anger. "Did you hear what he said?" he fumed.

"I know man, take it easy," Colin kept saying.

"I don't wanna take it easy; I wanna beat the shit outta him!" Logan insisted.

Rory finally spoke. "Logan, look, calm down."

Logan gradually stopped resisting until the guys felt it was safe to let go.

"Maybe you should go; I have some things I need to say to Dean," she said, her voice soft but firm.

"What? After -" Logan said incredulously.

"Yes," she said, putting a hand on his arm. "Go, here's the clue, I'll catch up with you in a minute."

"No point, love, Colin and Steph already won, we were just coming to tell you," Finn said, keeping close to Logan in case of another outburst.

"Ok, well…" Rory said helplessly as the entire town pretended not to be listening in. She crossed her arms in front of herself, suddenly very cold. Asta whined and rubbed against her legs.

"We'll see you later, alright, love?" Finn said. "Let's go to the car, shall we?" he said to Logan, pulling Logan along with him. Colin briefly smiled at Rory and grabbed Asta's leash. The LDB group broke off and walked away.

"Ok, folks, nothin' to see here. Move along," Luke said in his usual gruff tone. The townspeople began to scatter, casting backward glances. Miss Patty and Babbette walked away, heads together deep in conversation.

Luke walked over to Dean. "I'm gonna be in my diner. See that window?" Luke said, pointing to Luke's Diner. Dean nodded. "I'm gonna be watchin' you from that window, and so help me God, if you lay a finger on her -"

"Thanks, Luke, I got it from here," Rory said.

"Ok," Luke said. He pointed at his eyes with two fingers, then Dean's, then back to his for emphasis.

Rory saw her mom out of the corner of her eye dragging Luke into the diner.

Now that they were alone, Dean looked expectantly at Rory. "Well?" he said, after she didn't say anything for a long time.

"That was way out of line and you know it," she said firmly.

"Oh please, Rory. I'm not a complete idiot. You had to have been cheating on me! Not one week after we break up and I see you with this jerk making out in _my _town in _my _store. What, were you trying to rub it in?" Dean said.

"That's not how it is at all!" Rory said.

"Then tell me how it is, Rory, 'cause I really wanna know," Dean said.

Rory wasn't quite sure how to respond. "It's just…" She couldn't find the words. "I mean, technically, you dumped me, so it's not really any of your business," she said, trying to weasel out of an explanation.

"Bullshit, Rory. We may have argued, but I have never treated you bad and you know it. I deserve at least some explanation, and I'd really like it to be the truth," Dean said.

"The truth?" Rory said. "The truth is that Logan was just a friend, and nothing happened between us except the two kisses that you saw – which is terribly ironic, when you think about it – and we didn't begin…well, dating, I guess, until after the ball."

Dean was obviously having a hard time swallowing this. "You mean to tell me that nothing was going on when _we_ were dating?"

"No!" Rory said. Except that wasn't entirely the truth. "I mean… nothing on my end. I didn't think of Logan as anything except a friend, and I had no idea he had feelings for me. I always thought he was just messing with my head or being nice, but then one thing led to another, and, well, I guess there was an attraction there…but you don't really want to hear this, do you?" Rory asked.

"So you only started sleeping with him _after_ we broke up?" Dean said doubtfully.

"I haven't slept with him," Rory said angrily.

"Really?" Dean said suspiciously. Rory just looked at him. "Really?" Dean repeated, this time believing her.

"Really, ok?" Rory said, looking at her feet.

Dean didn't say anything. He just considered Rory. "You're not his type," he said.

"Excuse me?" Rory said indignantly.

"You're not his type. We had a discussion about you," Dean said loftily.

"When? When did you have a discussion about me?" Rory asked.

"When you guys were having your cozy little lunch bunch," Dean said.

"I see," Rory said, thinking back. "So what transpired, if you don't mind my asking?"

"Not at all," Dean said, rocking back on his heels. "He said that you're a great girl, but you're a girlfriend girl."

"So?" Rory said, not hearing anything important.

"I don't think you understand," Dean said condescendingly. "He said you're a _girlfriend_ kind of girl. As in he would never be willing to be a boyfriend."

"I see," Rory said, slowly understanding.

"I mean, I could be wrong," Dean said, realizing he had the upper hand. "Does he call himself your boyfriend? Does he introduce you as his girlfriend?" he asked innocently.

"Well, there hasn't been a situation – I mean, not in so many words – there's just not been an opportunity…" Rory was at a loss. "It hasn't come up," she admitted.

"Uh huh," Dean said, trying hard not to smile. "Look, I've got to get back to work, so…"

"Right, right," Rory said distractedly. "See ya," she said, forgetting to yell at him. She was preoccupied with what he said about Logan. She missed his knowing smile as he went back into the Market.

Rory walked down the sidewalk in a daze. She went into Luke's Diner.

"Hey, babe," Lorelai said sympathetically, greeting her from a table. She patted the chair next to her and Rory slid into it.

"You," Luke said, pointing to Rory, "get a giant cup of coffee and pie. Lots of pie," he said, walking back into the kitchen.

Lorelai grinned in spite of herself. "And that, my dear, is why we date men in the food industry."

"Is Emeril taken? 'Cause suddenly I feel very single. Or what about the Naked Chef? Jamie what's-his-face. He's closer to my age," Rory said, setting her chin in her hand.

"Aw, honey, it's Jamie Oliver, but you already have one Naked Guy in your life," Lorelai said, stroking Rory's back.

"Aren't you the one who said you can never have too many naked guys in your life?" Rory said.

"No, but it sounds like me," Lorelai said. She paused, not sure how much to say. "So…wanna tell Mommy what happened?"

"I'm sorry, couldn't you hear? The whole town was there," Rory said miserably.

"I'd like to hear your version," Lorelai prodded.

"Well, you know Dean and I broke up at the ball," Rory started.

"Yes, dear, we drove you home," Lorelai said wryly.

"Right, right. Well, after Dean broke up with me at the beach, what I didn't tell you was Logan came out to find me," Rory said in a small voice.

"Oh _really_?" Lorelai said with an eyebrow raised.

"It was no big deal, I just gave a patented Gilmore girl rant on the snow, and he said something about great things still being able to happen and then he kissed me and I hung out with him and his friends for awhile before I came to find you," Rory explained.

"Yeah, two hours when I didn't know where you were, missy," reprimanded Lorelai.

"You gonna wave around your Mom Card or you want me to continue the story?" Rory said.

"Sorry, sorry. Continue," Lorelai said.

"So anyway, I hung out with the group and they cheered me up. Finn did a one-man rendition of West Side Story but hurt his arm when he tried to re-enact the rumble and fell off the pool table he was performing on. He then suggested we play strip Scrabble, and the group pretty much disbanded after that," Rory explained.

"Well, you know, when you're hanging out with Yalies, the intellectual games abound," Lorelai said sardonically.

"Right," Rory said with a light chuckle. "Anyway, ever since then, Logan and I have been hanging out."

Lorelai just looked at her.

"Ok, so, hanging out with kissing. But the thing is, tonight, Dean said something that really upset me," Rory said.

"Well, I was at least there for that," Lorelai said.

"No, that wasn't it," Rory said.

"Excuse me? He said some pretty nasty things," Lorelai said.

"Yeah, but they weren't true. The thing that did bug me is something that might be true," Rory said.

"And what's that?" Lorelai asked.

"Well, he said that Logan told him that I was a girlfriend kind of girl, and that wasn't his type," Rory said with a troubled look.

"Well obviously he thinks you're enough his type to be with and fight over," Lorelai said.

"Maybe," Rory said slowly. "Or maybe Dean's right. I mean, Logan and I have never discussed our status… I think we're dating, but I'm not sure. I mean, before, with guys, I knew when they were my boyfriend. It was obvious. But this whole Logan thing…" she drifted off. "I mean, is it a college thing?" she asked.

"Ok, well, I'm the wrong person to ask here," Lorelai said. "But when you're an adult, which I will occasionally admit that you are, things are more complicated. Everything's not as clear cut."

"Hm," Rory said thoughtfully. "So should I ask him?"

"God, no!" Lorelai said. "You don't want to seem desperate," she said with a grin.

"Right," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

* * *

"Get a hold of yourself, man," Finn said as they walked back to Logan's car. Logan was still obviously upset. 

"I'm sorry, it's just… the nerve of that guy!" Logan said, cracking his knuckles.

"Um, don't you think you're overreacting a bit?" Colin said.

"What?" Logan said sharply.

"Look, I just think you're getting in too deep too fast," Colin said.

"He's right, mate," Finn offered.

"What are you talking about," Logan said sulkily.

"I'm talking about you and Rory. This is becoming pretty serious. Now, I know you're in that lovey-dovey stage that we all go through when we first meet a particularly fantastic girl, but generally that will wear off in about a week and it's time to move on to the next," Colin said.

"I know," Logan said grumpily.

Colin and Finn just shared a look. "Look, is this something you're doing to piss off your parents?" Finn said as they reached the car.

"What?" Logan said, blowing the comment off. "That's ridiculous," he said, sliding into the driver's seat.

"Not really," Colin said, picking up where Finn left off. "I mean, you've never gotten this worked up over a girl, and we're reaching that point of our illustrious collegiate careers where the parental units are going to start expecting us to settle down and get serious about the family biz," he said rationally. "It makes sense that you would see this as an opportunity to get back at your parents by dating an unsuitable girl."

"What are you, Dr. Phil?" Logan said derisively. "You're full of crap."

"Maybe, my friend," interjected Finn. "But are you seriously suggesting that you want a _girlfriend_?" he said incredulously.

"Maybe I do," Logan said defiantly.

"What?" Colin and Finn chorused.

"Oh please," Colin scoffed. "Logan Huntzberger, man's man, man about town, having a serious girlfriend? Now is the time to _play_, man, before real life starts. You only have another year to live it up before you gotta be responsible."

"I guess that's true," Logan ceded.

Colin sat back, relieved he had talked some sense into his friend.

"But…" Logan said.

"Oh my God. But _what_?" Finn said.

"I keep having these feelings for her that… well, that I usually don't feel for other girls," Logan said.

"Such as?" Colin asked.

"Like, for instance," Logan said, shifting in his seat, "I feel this weird protective thing. I mean, I know she can take care of herself, but I feel like I want to…I dunno…beat people up on her behalf."

"As you so generously displayed earlier," Finn said wryly. Logan just smiled.

"Seriously, man, at least hire thugs to beat up people for her," Colin said, shaking his head.

Logan laughed out loud at that one. "I suppose that's more reasonable," he said.

"Look," Colin said, serious this time. "It's not that we don't like Rory, we do, it's just that things are already way more complicated than you're used to, and is she really worth all this trouble?"

Logan pondered Colin's question. The car sat in silence for several minutes.

Finn was the first to break the silence. "Did we ever pay Kirk?" he wondered from the backseat.

"Oh shit!" Logan and Colin chorused. The guys laughed as Logan did a u-turn.

"I knew we forgot something," Colin said, thumping the dashboard. He regarded Logan. "Are you gonna go find her when we get back?"

"Nah; I think I'll just sleep on this one," Logan said. Colin and Finn shared another glance, but neither said a word.

* * *

Sleep on it? Could Logan be having second thoughts about getting involved with Rory? And why won't Dean leave her alone? Ok, I'll stop sounding like a soap opera and begin my pleas for reviews. Do please! Next chapter, we'll see Paris at her obnoxious best, but that's all I'm telling you. :) Oh yes, and also, check my profile for a list of Gilmore-isms! Many will seem like "duh" statements, but you never know; there might be people out there who have never seen "Gone with the Wind." I don't know any, but I'm sure they're out there. :)

And did I beg for reviews? Cuz if not, I'm beggin' ya now!


	6. Rory's Been Bingleyed, So Golightly

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right**

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**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Thank you so much for your reviews! They rock my socks off. This chapter drops in on a few real season 5 events, but I've made them my own, if you don't mind. And if you do mind, too bad! ;) Although, I did steal two lines from the ASP team, because as clever as I am, they just seemed too great! (You'll see what I mean.) And now, I know you're all dying to find out how Logan handled things, so read on! And don't forget, if you get confused by any references, or if you just feel like it, check out the Gilmoreisms on my profile.

* * *

CHAPTER 6: RORY'S BEEN BINGLEYED, SO GOLIGHTLY

* * *

Rory flopped down on her dorm room couch and began mindlessly flipping channels. 

"What's with you?" Paris asked, busy at her craft station. "You've been in a very Daria mood lately."

"Nothing," said Rory, still flipping.

"Nothing, huh?" said Paris. She stopped working and turned to face Rory. "I don't believe you. Come on, out with it. Terrence says I can't have any negative energy around me, especially at the beginning of the semester, so spit it out."

Rory rolled her eyes. "It's nothing... just some boy trouble."

"Ha, I knew it!" Paris said.

"You knew what," Rory said, turning off the TV to focus on Paris.

"You've been Bingleyed," Paris said authoritatively.

"Excuse me?" Rory said, eyebrows raised.

"You're Jane, and Huntzberger is Bingley. He's dropped you like a hot potato for no apparent reason, am I right?"

Rory was annoyed, but knew Paris was right. "Yes," she admitted.

Paris continued. "Yep, you're Jane and he's Bingley, while _I_ am Elizabeth."

"Why do you get to be Elizabeth?" Rory asked indignantly.

"Because," Paris said, "it's my analogy; I get to be whoever I want."

"I see," Rory said wryly. "So who's your Darcy?" she asked, opening a bottle of water. "It has to be Colin or Finn for your analogy to work," she said, taking a sip.

"Please, I'd rather eat my macaroni ashtrays," Paris snorted. "Actually, it's Doyle," she said nonchalantly.

"Doyle?" Rory exclaimed, water coming out of her nose.

"Yes; I can sense your surprise," Paris said.

"_That's_ the understatement of the year," Rory said under her breath, searching for a tissue.

"We met through a speed-dating session. Not typically my bag, but I thought, hey, what the hell, right? So anyway, Doyle and I are now sleeping together."

"O-k..." Rory said, slowly getting up from the couch and backing to her bedroom door. "I'm just gonna...do some copy-editing homework now, um, I'll catch ya later," she said, walking into her room. She shut the door behind her and sat down at her desk. She drummed her fingers and looked around her room. Her French memo board caught her eye, and she reached over and pulled the fortune down. "Romance comes into your life this year in a very unusual sort of way," she read aloud to herself. She set it down on the desk and considered it, head resting in her hand.

Rory sighed. "This is ridiculous," she told herself. She reached for her cell phone, and with great determination, dialed Logan's number.

"Hello?" someone answered.

"Hi, um, Logan?" Rory said, trying not to sound too nervous.

"Nope, this is Lanny. can I take a message?"

Rory panicked. "Um, no, no, no message."

"Ok," Lanny said, unceremoniously hanging up.

Rory made a face at her phone before setting it back down on the desk. "This sucks," she said to herself. Suddenly, her phone rang.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Rory! Hi! I just wanted you to know that we have a gig this weekend. Are you busy?"

"Lane! I'm so glad you called. I need girl talk," Rory replied.

"Ooh, I'm here girlfriend. Speak freely," Lane replied.

"Well, it's this Logan situation," Rory started. She heard a crash in Lane's background.

"Uh huh?" Lane said, unfazed.

"Um...are you ok over there?" Rory asked.

"Oh yeah, it's nothing," Lane said, blowing it off. "The guys are just having an argument. Continue."

"Ok. So like I was saying, I think-"

Rory heard voices this time.

"Dude, all I'm sayin' is that John Mayer went mainstream but developed his own sound and still managed to jam with the greats. That's all I'm sayin'. I could be John Mayer," she heard Zack say.

"Does that mean that you think I'm as good as Pino Palladino?" Brian asked hopefully.

"No. Brian, you're not listening to me. Lane!" Zack protested.

"Ugh! Just a minute, Rory," Lane said. "Brian, I'm sure with time you will grow to be Pino Palladino-like, and Zack, I highly doubt Eric Clapton is going to be taking you under his wing anytime soon, but if you really want, we'll plan on a Hendrix cover, ok? Now shut up. I'm trying to talk to Rory."

"Dream-killer!" Zack said.

"Ok. You have my full attention," Lane said, ignoring the guys.

"Um, you know what? Now's not a good time," Rory said.

"No! I'm really listening!" Lane protested.

"I mean on my end," Rory fibbed. "It's Paris."

"Say no more," Lane said. "I'll call you about the gig later."

"Thanks. Bye!" said Rory.

"Bye!" said Lane.

"Did I hear my name?" Paris called from the common room.

Rory just moaned and put her head on her desk.

* * *

Logan was sitting in PoliSci when Robert slipped in, late. 

"You're late, bro," Logan whispered.

"Did I miss much?" Robert whispered back.

"Nah; he's in the middle of a Nixon rant," Logan replied.

"Good, good. Hey, there's been something I've been meaning to ask you," Robert said.

"Shoot," said Logan.

"Well, you know Finn's birthday party is this weekend," Robert said.

"Yeah; everything's all arranged, though, right?" Logan asked quietly.

"Yeah, except he changed the theme. What once was the Chinese New Year, to honor his fascination after seeing Memoirs of a Geisha, changed to neo-Bohemian squalor, then Narnia, briefly back to a night at Hogwarts, then to King Kong," Robert replied.

"So what's the final verdict?" Logan asked with a grin.

"Well, we convinced him to abandon the whole gay cowboy theme and finally he agreed to a general Hollywood theme, as long as the stars/roles are recognizable."

"Got it," Logan said. "So what's the question?"

"Right. The question. Well, I just wondered if it was ok if I ask that reporter girl to go with me," Robert said.

Logan immediately tensed. "Rory?" he asked. His mind screamed no, but he didn't let on.

"Yeah," Robert said with a grin.

"Why you askin' me?" Logan said, feigning disinterest.

"Well, it's just that you two were so hot and heavy for a while there. I mean, it was disgusting, really," Robert joked, "but I just thought that I ought to clear it with you first. You know, bros before hos and all that."

"Hey, consider it cleared," Logan said, staring straight at the front of the room.

"Thanks, man," Robert said. He sat back and regarded the professor. "Do you think he's gonna be on this rant all day?"

"Probably," Logan said through gritted teeth.

"Huh. Well, I'm gonna peace out, then. Think I'll take a nap before Calc. Later," Robert said, slipping back out of class.

"Yeah, later," Logan said to nobody. He looked down and was surprised to find that his pencil had snapped in two.

* * *

Rory finished the last of her coffee in the dining hall. 

"Hey Marty, you gonna eat that brownie?" she asked guiltily.

Marty grinned. "Oh please. Don't even pretend that you haven't been staring at it the whole time I've been talking."

"I haven't! Honest!" Rory said. Marty just gave her a look. "Well, I might have missed the last sentence or two," she admitted.

"Take it," Marty said, nudging the brownie toward her. "I can't deprive a wallower of chocolate."

"Thank you!" Rory said gratefully, reaching over and taking a bite.

"So, you gonna tell me why you're wallowing?" Marty asked, sitting back in his chair.

"It's silly, really," Rory said.

"Silly I can deal with," Marty said.

"Well," Rory said, mildly uncomfortable, "I was sorta dating Logan over break."

Marty tried not to look surprised. "Oh really?" he squeaked.

"Yeah," Rory said, running a hand through her hair. "But...he just stopped calling me. No reason. Well, I mean, there might have been a reason, but I'm not sure," Rory said.

"Um... what do you think happened?" Marty asked carefully, not sure if he wanted to know more details.

"Well, I mean, we never said anything official, you know? It just sort of...happened. And then there was this confrontation with my ex-boyfriend."

"You mean Dean?" Marty asked.

"Yeah," Rory said. "He said... well, he said some really nasty things, most of which weren't true, and Logan got into a real fight with him, and that was pretty much it."

"Huh," Marty said, taking it all in.

"I guess you could say I'm quasi-wallowing. I'm wallowing in self-pity more than any real break-up. I don't think it even counted as a break-up," Rory said.

"Ok," Marty said, thinking about how confusing girls could be.

"But you know what?" Rory said brightly. "I think I might be ready to start dating again. I mean, what's one little setback, you know?" she said with forced enthusiasm. "So Logan dropped me. So what? It's not the end of the world as we know it. That makes him a jerk and me... well, free, I guess."

"Really?" Marty said, a little bit hopefully. "'Cause, I was thinking, if so, then-"

"Rory, right?" said a voice from above.

"Oh, hi Robert," Rory said. Robert was standing next to their table. "You want to join us?"

"No, no, I'm only stopping by. I have class soon," he said, completely ignoring Marty. "Got a question for ya."

"Shoot," Rory said.

"So Finn's got a birthday coming up," Robert said.

"Uh huh," Rory said.

"And he's having this huge birthday bash this weekend," Robert continued. "I was wondering: do you wanna go?"

"With you?" Rory asked, surprised.

"Yeah. You know, I pick you up, you wear something pretty, I say how nice you look, we go, have a good time, I bring you back to your place, and if the evening is pleasurable, then we repeat the process," Robert said.

Rory considered his offer. "Well..."

"I'll even open doors for you and everything," Robert offered with a smirk.

"Sure, why not. Let's celebrate another year of Finn," Rory said.

"Good!" Robert said, satisfied. "I'll pick you up at 9 on Saturday. And it's themed: anything Hollywood so long as your character or movie star is recognizable."

"Sounds good," Rory said.

"Does it? Hmm," Robert said, grinning as he walked away.

Rory smiled triumphantly at Marty. "Wow. So, that worked!" she said. She scrunched her eyes shut. "I'm going to have a million dollars appear magically on my plate," she said, opening her eyes.

"Now did you really think that was going to work?" Marty said wryly.

"One can only hope," Rory said.

* * *

Rory patiently sat in her common room while Lorelai put the finishing touches on her hair. "Thank Miss Patty for me," she said to Lorelai. "The cigarette holder totally completes the look." 

"I did. She just made me promise that you would take lots of pictures for her. You know, in case she plans to rob the cradle anytime soon," Lorelai said, standing back and admiring her work.

"How old was her last husband?" Rory wondered aloud.

"Ach, who knows. She figures if Demi can do it, so can Patty," Lorelai said. "So what do you think? Poofy enough?" she asked, holding up a mirror.

"The poofiest!" Rory said with a grin. She reached up to touch it, but Lorelai slapped her hand away. "Hands off, buster."

"Ow! What gives? You've emptied an entire can of hair spray up there. In fact, you should go patch that hole you just made in the ozone," Rory said.

"I'll just get Luke to do it. He's the one with the tools, and he's also probably on better terms with Mother Earth," Lorelai reasoned. "Just don't get it all mussed up with this... what was his name? Robert?"

"Yes, Robert," Rory said, slowly standing up and practicing gesturing with the cigarette holder.

"Uh huh. And do we like this Robert?" Lorelai asked.

Rory considered the matter, biting the end of the cigarette holder. "He seems nice enough," she decided.

Lorelai gave her a stern look. "And are we using this Robert to make a certain party jealous?"

"No, we are not," Rory countered. "Robert asked me out, and I accepted. If a certain party should happen to be at this little gathering, then fine, but I shan't be bothered with him," she said with a flourish.

"Ok," Lorelai said. She stepped back and looked at Rory. "Just, please, Golightly on him, ok?" she said with a straight face.

"I'm not _even_ going to ask how long you were waiting to use that one," Rory said dryly.

Lorelai just giggled and clapped her hands. "At least twenty minutes!" she said.

"Any more before you are unceremoniously escorted out?" Rory said, hands on hips.

"Yes. A-hem. I guess it's time to... haul out the Hol-ly! Put up the tree be-fore my," clap, "spirit falls again!" she sang.

"Cut the Mame before I maim you!" Rory threatened.

"Ooh, good one! Ok, one more, one more!" Lorelai said breathlessly.

"Goodbye, Mom," Rory said, pushing her mother toward the door.

"Ok, ok," Lorelai said, grabbing her purse before Rory finally stopped at the door. She slipped on her coat. "I just have one thing to say," she said, flipping her hair outside the coat collar.

"What?" Rory said suspiciously.

"I hope you'll be Peppard with compliments! Bye!" Lorelai said in one breath before making a fast exit.

"Good grief," Rory said to the empty room, pulling on her long black gloves. She took one last look in the mirror, adjusting her necklace, which was already feeling a bit heavy, and sat down to wait for Robert.

* * *

Logan was thoroughly bored with the party. It wasn't that Finn threw boring parties; quite the opposite. It was just that he was having a hard time paying attention to his date. He took another sip of his drink and attempted to focus. 

"So anyway, Jessica said that Jenna said that Brittany said that Amanda said that Jonathan had gastric bypass surgery because he refused to go to fat camp," she explained.

"Uh huh," Logan said, already lost.

"Isn't that too wild?" she said.

"Crazy wild," Logan replied, taking a longer sip this time. He didn't know how much more inane gossip he could take.

"Ohmygod, look, there's Robert!" she squealed. Logan's interest was suddenly piqued. "He's, like, a cowboy or something," she said, cocking her head to one side.

Logan craned his neck to see Robert, and sure enough, there he was, dressed up like John Wayne. Once Robert moved aside to greet a friend, however, Logan saw Rory. He had a sharp intake of breath. "Damn," he breathed. She looked breathtaking in a little black dress with long black gloves and a wide sparkling necklace, her hair piled high upon her head, fastened with a diamond comb. He was mesmerized as she laughed at something Robert said.

"Don't you think?" he heard his date say.

"What?" he said distractedly.

"I said, she looks almost exactly like Audrey Hepburn, don't you think?"

"Yeah, it's uncanny," he said.

"Let's go say hi," she said, tugging on his arm.

"Oh, I don't think-"

"Logan!" Robert said, shaking hands with Logan. "Excellent choice. You know Rory?" he said rhetorically.

"Holly," Logan said, dipping his head in a slight bow.

"No, he said Ro-ry," his date said exaggeratedly.

Rory merely raised her eyebrows and took in their costumes.

"Indy, Marilyn," she said icily. Logan, ignoring her tone, grinned and tipped his hat. He had a wide brown fedora perched on his head, and he wore a loose white shirt with the top few buttons unbuttoned along with some khaki slacks. Over the shirt, he wore a brown leather jacket, and he also wore a holster that held a fake gun and a very real whip. His date was a skinnier version of Marilyn Monroe.

"Where are my manners? Robert and Rory, this is...Clarissa," he said, having to think for a moment.

"No, silly," she said, playfully hitting his chest, "it's Larissa."

Rory tried not to laugh.

"Right, Larissa. This is Larissa," he said. "So," he said to Robert, trying to mask his jealousy, "you're the Duke, eh?"

Robert grinned. "You could say that."

"I don't understand. The duke of what?" Larissa said.

Rory tried with all her might not to roll her eyes.

"The Duke as in John Wayne," Logan explained slowly.

"Ohhh," she said. There was a pause. "I still don't get it," she said simply.

"Logan, why don't you explain things to Larissa. We've got to make the rounds. See ya," Robert said with a smirk. Rory gave a little wave and flashed a charming smile before Robert put his hand on the small of her back and led her across the room.

Logan's jaw tightened.

Larissa sighed. "Wanna dance?" she offered.

"Sure," Logan said, his eyes following Robert and Rory until he lost them in the crowd.

* * *

"Where's the man of the hour?" Robert said, greeting Colin who was already bordering on tipsy. Rory hid her smile as she took in Colin's Rocky costume. 

"Ummmmm..." he considered. "Oh! Here he is!" Colin said, throwing his arm around Finn as Finn walked up.

"Oh my God!" Rory exclaimed, momentarily averting her eyes before fully looking at Finn. "Is he who I think he is?" she asked Robert.

"Of course I am, darling," slurred Finn. "I'm fucking Johnny Weissmuller, can't you see the resemblance?" he asked, striking a muscle pose.

Rory cringed as she beheld Finn in all his glory. He was clad only in a glorified loincloth.

"So," he said, one hand gripping her shoulder. "Me Tarzan. You Jane?" he leered.

"Aaaaand no more birthday juice for you," Robert said, smiling as he lifted Finn's hand from Rory's shoulder.

"Aw," pouted Finn. "Don't I even get a birthday kiss?"

"Um, you know what?" Rory said. "I think Jane sees Cheetah. Jane go now," she said with a grin.

"Damn," Finn said, but he was immediately distracted by a passing redhead. "Oy! It's my birthday. Give us a kiss, love!" he said, following her.

Rory shook her head.

"You want something to drink?" Robert asked.

"No, maybe la-" Rory noticed Logan dancing with his Marilyn knockoff. "You know what? I'd love one," she said defiantly.

"Ok," Robert said, doling out two cups of punch.

* * *

Logan was leaning against the wall nursing his drink while his date was in the bathroom. 

"Huntz! How's it goin'?" Colin said, stumbling up to Logan.

"Fine," Logan said, slowly taking a sip.

Colin followed Logan's line of vision to see Rory with Robert.

"Ah. Pining, huh? Mad that Robert stole her away?" Colin said without tact.

"Hey, Billie Jean is not my girl," Logan said.

"Ha!" laughed Colin.

Logan just gave a half-hearted smile and took another sip.

"Ok, so seriously, seriously," Colin said in his serious-drunk voice. "Are you regretting the whole Rory situation?" he asked, shifting to lean against the wall next to Logan, mimicking his stance.

"You could say that," Logan allowed.

"Man! I have never seen you this worked up over a girl," marveled Colin.

"Please! I am not worked up. Notice how I am calmly standing here instead of sucker-punching Robert and dragging Rory outside," Logan said amiably.

"Uh huh," Colin said doubtfully.

"Besides," Logan said, "hypothetically speaking, if, say, I decided I _did_ want to get her back, I mean..." he drifted off. "Nah," he said, blowing it off.

"Let's go with this hypothetical situation," Colin said encouragingly.

"No, it's stupid, I mean, you guys were right; I'm young, and chances are that next year Dad's going to want me to get serious about graduation, so live it up while I can, you know?"

"I know," Colin said. "But the whole point was to have fun. The question is, Logan," Colin said, feeling very wise in his state of inebriation, "are you really having fun?"

* * *

Rory was really having fun. Five glasses of 80-proof punch later, she found herself not caring so much whether Logan was here with another girl or not. She was just enjoying the warm feeling from the happy happy punch, and Robert was turning out to be kind of fun. She doubted that he was second-date material, but at least she was out; out of the dorm and out having a good time. 

"Whoa, you ok there?" laughed Robert as Rory faltered a bit on the dance floor.

She laughed. "Fine, fine, I'm fine," she said, sliding her arms back around his neck as they danced.

"Dip alert," Robert said, dipping her and then bringing her back up.

"You're a very good dancer," Rory said emphatically.

"Thank you. And you're very drunk," Robert replied.

"Hey! I'm drot so nunk!" Rory protested. "I mean...oh no, words have pooped out on me," she said sadly.

Robert laughed. "Ok then. You stick to the dancing and leave the words to me."

"O-k," Rory agreed.

"You know, you're pretty cute," Robert said.

"I am?" Rory said. "I am!" she repeated.

"For a drunk," he added with a smirk.

"Hey! I told you, I'm not-"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," Robert said, cutting her off. "Well, my former comment still stands," he said jauntily, leaning in for a kiss.

"Mind if I cut in?" Logan said from behind Robert. Robert stopped in mid-air, thwarted.

"Aah! Kill my buzz, why don't ya?" Robert said indignantly.

Rory just smiled. "I'm cute," she informed Logan, still hanging onto Robert.

"Yes you are," Robert said dryly. "She's all yours, I'm gonna take this opportunity to go to the bathroom. You kids behave yourselves," he said, extracting Rory's arms from his neck and starting the search for the bathrooms.

"So..." Logan said, holding out his arms. Rory harrumphed but accepted his unspoken invitation, taking care not to get too close. "You having fun tonight?" he asked casually.

"Actually, I am, thanks. How about you?" she said sarcastically.

"I'm starting to," he replied. He pulled her closer, and she reluctantly complied.

They didn't speak for awhile, just dancing to the music. Finally, Rory broke the silence. She narrowed her eyes at Logan, averting them when he met her glance."Ugh, I am never making decisions based on fortune cookies ever again."

"What?" Logan asked, amused.

"You're such a- a contumacious reprobate," she said, annoyed, not explaining her comment.

"A what?" he asked.

"You heard me," she said grumpily.

"I heard you, but I don't quite follow," he said. Realization dawned on his face. "Was that one of your GRE words-of-the day?" he teased, smirking. Rory just glared at him.

"So I'm a reprobate, huh?" he said, closer to her ear.

"Yes, a rogue, a knave, malefactor, boor, cretin, scoundrel," she continued.

"And you don't like scoundrels?" he said, shifting so his lips hovered over hers.

"No," she said, her voice faltering due to his proximity. "No, I do not."

"You sure?" he said, closing the gap.

"Yes," she practically whispered. "I hate them," she said, closing her eyes. "I hate you."

"Do you?" Logan murmured on her lips. "I'm sorry to hear that," he said, kissing her. His arms slid around her waist, pressing her body flush to his. Rory's hands went immediately to his hair, and when blocked by his hat, slid down to gently hold his face.

Rory let him kiss her, remembering how natural it felt to kiss him, until she remembered how he had behaved recently. She broke away and slapped him.

"What the hell was that for?" he asked, shocked.

"You know damn well what for," Rory said.

"What?" he asked, rubbing his cheek. "Come on. You can't tell me that you were having more fun with Robert," he snorted derisively.

"Robert is fine," Rory defended. "Need I remind you that he's _your _friend. He's fun. And interesting."

"Interesting," Logan repeated.

"Yeah, interesting," Rory said.

"But does interesting make your blood boil?" Logan asked, stepping forward and seductively nibbling on her ear.

Frustrated, Rory shoved him away. "God! You know, this is _not_ how it works. You don't just sweet talk me into your bed."

"Who said anything about a bed?"

"I am not that kind of girl!" Rory continued, ignoring his input. She started walking to the door, and Logan was following on her heels. "I mean, people are always saying that they're not that kind of girl when really they are, they just want you to work for it. But I'm being for real when I say I am not that kind of girl. I _don't_ date a multitude of people at the same time. I _don't_ have casual sex. It's not who I am," she asserted.

"What does that even mean?" Logan said.

"Ugh! You're impossible!" Rory shouted.

"And you're uptight!" he countered.

Rory seethed. "I'm not uptight! I am _so_ the opposite of uptight."

"Oh, that's just the punch talking," Logan countered.

"No, no, just because I'm a _girlfriend_ girl, that does not make me uptight," she said, crossing her arms.

"A girlfriend girl? Where did that come from?" Logan asked, beginning to get confused.

"Where did that come from?" Rory was incensed. "From you, actually."

"I didn't say that!" Logan said, now genuinely confused.

"Ohhh yes you did, just not to my face," she said. "Hey, you know what? Let me add a new word to that chain. You are a cowardly, yellow...bellied...livered...well, you get the point. You suck," she said.

"Well...your eloquence astounds, but I'm afraid that has no bearing on this conversation," Logan said.

"Oh doesn't it?" Rory countered.

"Hey, I never made any promises," said Logan in his own defense.

"Well, I shouldn't have expected any less from you," Rory said, turning to leave.

Logan caught her arm. "What do you mean?"

"You're just a playboy. You can't commit, and I should have known better," she said, all calm and rational now.

"Hey, don't say I can't do something. You don't know that. If I say I can do something, I can do something," Logan insisted.

"Well that's the point, isn't it? You never said you could," Rory pointed out.

"Well..." Logan said, not sure how to go about it. "What if I said I could now?"

"What?" Rory asked, confused.

"What if I said I wanted to commit to you?" he pushed.

"That's not what I'm saying," Rory said, exasperated. "You're not listening to me! God," she said, frustrated. "Just... I need some air," she said, really wanting to get out of there.

Robert suddenly appeared at her side. "Hey, you okay?" he asked, glancing back and forth between Rory and Logan.

"I'm fine," she said defeatedly. "Can we go? I'm starting to get a headache."

"Yeah, sure, let's get our coats," Robert said, taking her elbow. "Later, man," he said to Logan.

"Later," Logan said helplessly. Rory wouldn't look at him, and she and Robert walked away.

Logan just stared after them, watching through the window. He watched as they drove off.

"Man, that was a real Letterman/O'Reilly moment you guys were having," Colin said, coming up to Logan.

"You could say that," Logan said distantly.

"So what's your plan?" Colin asked.

"What plan?" Logan asked, looking at Colin.

"Your plan to get her back, of course," Colin said.

A smile slowly spread across Logan's face. "You are a genius, my friend," he said, clapping a hand on Colin's shoulder. "Now, here's what we're gonna do..."

* * *

Oh ma goodness! What is goin' on in that boy's head? And by the way, poor Marty, huh? He never gets the girl. But he got to be in Rent, so that's a hell of a consolation prize. Maybe someday somebody will write a Rory/Marty fic. Anyway, hoped you liked the lil' bit o' Paris and the crazy bandmates arguing in the background. I'm off to sift through the I'm-gonna-get-her-back schemes floating around in My Documents. As per usual, do check my profile for Gilmore-isms and leave lovely reviews. I mean, you could leave nasty reviews if you wanted, but as Paris pointed out, we ought not have negative energy floating around at the beginning of the semester. :) 


	7. She Set Me Up!

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Sorry sorry _sorry_ this one took so long to come out! Life happens, you know? Well, really, 21 credit hours happened, so I've been a bit busy. But I hope this chapter is worth the wait! I got a little pop culture crazy in this one, so check the Gilmore-isms on my profile if they left you utterly confused.

Oh yeah...and quick recap of the story since it's been soooooo long since I updated: We started with the episode "The Party's Over," except in my world, Logan didn't just play boyfriend, he gave Rory a helluva kiss, which Dean witnessed and therefore decided to give Logan a black eye. Lots of banter and a breakup later, Logan and Rory started to date, but he pulled away after a major blowout with Dean, and his friends convinced him to drop Rory in favor of playing the field. Logan tried it, didn't like it, wants Rory back, but she's not going to give in so easily. That brings us to... now!

* * *

CHAPTER 7: SHE SET ME UP!

* * *

Rory walked into her dorm and was greeted with a pungent smell.

"Oh my God!" she exclaimed in disgust, pulling her turtleneck over her mouth and nose and closing the door with her elbow.

"Paris! What the hell is that smell?" Rory asked, still holding her turtleneck over her nose.

"It's for a project for my alternative medicine class. It's supposed to balance my chi," Paris said, annoyed.

"Well I'd say it's working really well," Rory said sarcastically, dropping her keys into her purse. "Aren't you breaking some sort of fire code by burning that incense?" she asked hopefully.

"No, I checked all the rules," Paris said.

Rory sighed into her shirt.

"I find it soothing," Paris said, oblivious.

"Well, I find it rancid. Can't you get in touch with your inner Deepak Chopra somewhere else?" Rory complained.

"No, it has to be in my happy place. This is my happy place," Paris said, sitting down at her craft corner.

"Fine. I have to go to Friday night dinner anyway," Rory said, hurrying to her room to change.

She shut the door. "This weekend is going to suck," she said to herself. She rummaged through the pile of clothes on her desk chair, but noticed that they had all absorbed the smell. "Aw, man!" she said a little louder. "Great! Now all my clothes are going to smell!"

"What was that?" Paris called.

"Nothing!" Rory replied. She decided to toss any clothes exposed to the air in a laundry bag. She changed quickly and walked briskly to the front door. Before leaving, she turned around, one hand on the door. "When is your project due?"

"Monday," Paris replied, breathing deeply.

Rory made a face. "See you Tuesday," she said.

"Bye," Paris said, closing her eyes and inhaling.

Rory rolled her eyes and walked out the door.

* * *

Lorelai pulled up next to Rory in the Gilmore driveway. She got out to hug Rory and ended up giving her the two-pat distance hug. "Love your new perfume. Eau de Pepé Le Pew?"

"No, Eau de Paris," Rory said as they walked to the front door. "Apparently, I now have a balanced chi."

"Well, who doesn't want a balanced chi," Lorelai said, ringing the doorbell.

"Hello, girls. You're late," announced Emily.

"Two minutes, Mom," Lorelai said as she shrugged off her coat. "Wait a minute… why are you answering the door?"

"Oh, I fired Sophie. She was incompetent," Emily said flippantly, closing the door behind them and taking their coats.

"So it wasn't Sophie's Choice to leave?" Lorelai said in mock seriousness.

Emily rolled her eyes and tossed their coats on a nearby chair before going to prepare drinks.

"Did you see that?" gasped Lorelai to Rory.

"See what?" Rory said in a low voice.

"She just tossed those coats in a slapdash fashion!"

"I'm sure she didn't mean to toss them in a slapdash fashion," Rory assured Lorelai, leading her into the room for drinks.

"Yes, she did!" Lorelai said emphatically. "They were carelessly flung away, like Zsa Zsa Gabor's latest husband."

"Zsa Zsa Gabor's had the same husband for at least 20 years now," Rory said.

"Really?" Lorelai said. She paused to consider. "Well, still, nine husbands does not bode well, my friend."

"Martini with a twist, Lorelai?" Emily offered from the other side of the room.

"Yeah," Lorelai said. "Thanks."

"Yeah?" Emily said, drawing out the word. "It's so refreshing to know that people feel comfortable enough to use slang in any given situation these days. I cannot tell you how _thrilled_ I am that we are such a casual society. Tell you what, why don't I go change into some hip huggers and we'll listen to Eminem while we have our drinks, hm?"

Lorelai made a face behind her mother's back while Rory couldn't help but grin and mouth "hip huggers?" to Lorelai as they sat down.

"Club soda, Rory?" Emily said without turning around.

"Yes, please," Rory said exaggeratedly. Lorelai stuck her tongue out at her.

"Wonderful," Emily said brightly, bringing the drinks to the girls.

"Where's Grandpa?" Rory asked, accepting her drink.

"Oh, he's in his study, something about one last business call before dinner. That man works entirely too hard," Emily said. "So, Rory, what's new in your life?"

Rory just exchanged glances with her mother. "Oh, you know, the usual. School, the paper, living with Paris… every day is an adventure."

"I can imagine. How about your love life? Does Annette still have her Frankie?" Emily asked cheekily.

"Ok, that was not a little bit creepy, Mom," Lorelai said.

"What?" Emily said innocently. "I'm only inquiring about Rory's love life, something I'm sure you two talk about all the time. So, Rory, how's Dean?"

"Um, we broke up, actually," Rory said, trying to keep an even voice.

"Oh, what a shame," Emily said, trying to sound disappointed. "Well, plenty of fish in the sea," she said brightly.

"Yep!" Rory said. She looked at Lorelai, desperate for a subject change.

"Hey, so, That 70s Show is gonna end this year, pretty sad, huh?" Lorelai said, blurting out the first thing that came to her mind.

"Excuse me?" Emily said.

"Yeah," Lorelai said, gaining momentum. "That show, you know, with the kids in the 1970s and they… um… live in the 1970s, and I think they smoke pot sometimes but it's still really sad that it's over, you know? Because two of the main characters left, and, come on, was the show really gonna survive without Eric and Kelso?" Lorelai said sensibly.

"What on earth is she talking about?" Emily said, giving Rory a truly baffled look.

"That 70s Show," Rory said, trying to be helpful.

"Yes, I got that much. It's a television show set in the 1970s about pot-smoking children, and we are sad this is ending, am I correct?"

"Well, when you put it like that," joked Lorelai. "A-hem." She cleared her throat uncomfortably.

"I'm going to go check on dinner. I'll be right back," Emily said.

As soon as she left the room, Rory spoke up. "A rant on That 70s Show? That's the best you could do?"

"Hey," Lorelai said defensively, "I could have gone on a rant about Howard Stern moving to satellite radio. Before you know it, two strippers and a midget would have wormed their way into the subject matter. Did you _really_ want that to happen?"

"You're sick," Rory said.

"Well you're ungrateful," Lorelai countered. "If you had given me more time, I could have prepared something."

"Oh yeah? Like what?"

"Well," Lorelai said thoughtfully, "I could have prepared a monologue."

"A monologue," Rory repeated flatly.

"Yes, a monologue. Maybe something like… ooh! Like Lester Bangs, Almost Famous." She started ranting in what was meant to be a man's voice. "You see this? This is fatuous, pseudo blubber! You know...which is fine, but...to foist it off as art - Or The Doors? Jim Morrison? He's a drunken buffoon posing a poet. Aw. Give me the Guess Who. Come on. They got the courage to be drunken buffoons, which makes them poetic!"

"Lane would appreciate," Rory allowed.

"Ooh! Or a little Casablanca, more Mom's style," Lorelai said.

"Oh man," Rory groaned, sliding down on the sofa.

"I've got a job to do, too," Lorelai said in her best Bogart, imploring to Rory/Ilsa. "Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Ilsa, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world."

"Hey, I think dinner's ready…" Rory said hopefully.

"Wait, wait, come on, I gotta do one girl one! Ok ok. Save the best for last: Who am I?" Lorelai said, preparing Rory. "My aunt died of influenza, so they said. But it's my belief they done the old woman in. Yes, Lord love you! Why should she die of influenza when she come through diphtheria right enough the year before?"

"Poor Professor Higgins indeed," Rory said, shaking her head at Lorelai's horrible Cockney accent.

"I think I do a great Eliza Doolittle," Lorelai pouted before continuing. "Now, what would you call a woman with that strength in her have to die of influenza, and what become of her new straw hat that should have come to me? Somebody pinched it, and what I say is, them that pinched it, done her in."

"Ok, enough, I accept my punishment. I shall never put you on the spot again!" Rory said dramatically.

"So long as we're clear," Lorelai said.

"We are clear! Very clear! Brita clear!" Rory said emphatically.

"Alright then," Lorelai said. They were quiet for a moment. "Wanna hear my Dutch?"

"Nooooo!" moaned Rory, grabbing two pillows off the couch and placing them over her ears.

"I had a farm in Africa...I had a farm in Africa at the foot of the Ngong Hills. I had a farm in Africa..." Lorelai said dreamily.

"Dinner's ready. Richard's waiting at the table…what _are_ you doing?" Emily said, pausing in the doorway.

"Bless you!" cried Rory.

"Nothing, Mom. You left us here to entertain ourselves, so I was just doing impressions," Lorelai explained.

"I see…" Emily said. "Well, come along, we don't have all night," she said, walking briskly into the dining room.

Lorelai and Rory dutifully stood up and followed her. "Yeah, cuz Friday night dinners _never_ seem interminable," Lorelai said under her breath.

"Shh!" hushed Rory.

"Hello, girls," Richard said, greeting them as they sat down at the table.

"Hey, Dad."

"Hi, Grandpa!"

"What's new?" he asked once everyone was seated.

"Rory broke up with her boyfriend," Emily said.

"_Un-_believable!" Lorelai said. Rory just looked miserable.

"Oh, how terrible, he seemed like such a nice young man," Richard said.

"It's ok, Grandpa," Rory said, concentrating on eating her carrots.

"Yes, well, c'est la vie," he said.

"You know, Rory," Emily said, a gleam in her eye. "My friend Cindy has a son about your age…"

"No! Um, no, Grandma, thanks anyway, but I think I ought to concentrate on school right now," Rory said.

"Well, it was just a thought…" Emily said, returning to her salad. "I know!" she said excitedly. "This might get your mind off of your boy troubles."

Lorelai rolled her eyes, but Emily just ignored her.

"One of our friends gave us some tickets to a Broadway show tomorrow evening, and we have an extra. Would you like to go?" she asked.

"Um, maybe, what show is it?" Rory asked, searching for a hidden agenda but not able to find one.

"Well, I can't seem to remember it. What was the name, Richard? Evil?"

"Oh, I don't know, Emily, I'll have to check after dinner," Richard said distractedly.

"Wicked?" Rory asked excitedly.

"Yes, that's it," Emily said triumphantly. "Wicked. I hear it's quite the hot ticket."

Rory and Lorelai exchanged glances. "You could say that," Rory said with a smile. "Sure, I'd love to go."

"Hey, uh, I'm not doing anything tomorrow night, you got any more tickets?" Lorelai said jokingly.

"No," Emily said.

"Of course not!" Lorelai said, shaking her head and spearing a carrot.

"Um, do you want me to meet you here?" Rory asked.

"Oh, heavens no," Emily said, waving the comment away. "You just be ready and pretty at 4:30 at the dorm."

"Oh, uh, that might be a problem," Rory said sheepishly.

"Why?" Emily asked.

"Well, my roommate is working on a project over the weekend and the entire suite smells rather heavily of incense," she explained.

"Oh," Emily said shortly. "Well, we'll work something out," she said.

"Cool. Thanks, Grandma!" Rory said, genuinely appreciative. She smiled to herself. Maybe this weekend wouldn't be so bad after all.

* * *

"Do I look New York-y?" Rory asked, twirling around.

Lorelai surveyed her. "Hmm: all black, very pointy shoes, purse that can only hold the _extremely_ portable Dorothy Parker and half a lipstick… yep, very New York-y."

"Thank you," Rory said, satisfied. She heard a car pulling into the driveway. "I bet that's Grandma."

"Yes. Have fun at the show; although, you know, I've been saying for years that Grandma and the Wicked Witch of the West were like _this_," Lorelai said, crossing her fingers.

"Not again, Mom!" Rory whined.

"I'm serious! How else do you think she got those tickets?" Lorelai said, hands on hips.

"Good grief," Rory said, shaking her head. She looked out the window, then squinted in confusion. "There are two cars."

"What?" Lorelai asked, peering over her shoulder.

"Two cars! Wait – Grandma's getting out of one," Rory said.

"Well who's in the other car?" Lorelai asked.

"Oh no," Rory said in disbelief, watching as a familiar blond got out of his car.

"Oh no what? Who is it?" Lorelai asked.

"I can't believe this! She's setting me up! Oh my God, she's setting me up!" Rory said, freaking out. "Why is she setting me up?"

"Aw, honey, don't you know? Yente's gonna make you marry the butcher," Lorelai said, stroking her hair.

Rory swatted her hand away. "This is not a time for Fiddler humor, ok? Why would Grandma invite him?"

"Well," Lorelai said slowly. "She apparently didn't know that you two had a thing. Well, except for that fake thing at the alumni party."

"Oh God, the party," Rory groaned, suddenly remembering the kiss that she had to explain to her grandparents. She sank back down onto the couch.

"And…" Lorelai continued, moving to sit beside her.

"And?" Rory said in despair.

"And they did a whole lot of commenting on what a cute couple you'd make while you were dancing at that charity ball," Lorelai said.

"Oh no," Rory said, "you're right."

"I usually am."

"So…" Rory said expectantly. "What are you gonna do about it?"

"Well, unless you really want to tell them all about your history with this guy, you're gonna have to suck it up and go," Lorelai said practically.

"What? No! There's got to be some other way," Rory said desperately.

"Um… Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!" Lorelai exclaimed. She went silent.

"Well?" Rory said impatiently.

"Sorry, hun, guess it's not gonna work," Lorelai said with a shrug.

"Argh!" Rory huffed, crossing her arms.

Lorelai gave her a pitied look, then began to slowly dance in her seat and sing quietly to herself. "Shake, shake, shake Señora, shake your body line…"

"Not funny!" Rory said sharply.

"Hush honey, never interrupt Mommy's Harry Belafonte. 'Shake, shake, shake Señora, shake it all the time…'"

"Oh, wow, would ya look at that? Daylight come and me wanna go home!" Rory said, tapping her watch.

"Come on, I'm Billy Idol over here!" pleaded Lorelai.

"What? I thought you were Harry Belafonte!" Rory asked in confusion.

"No, no, Billy Idol as in Dancing With Myself!" Lorelai said, pulling Rory off the couch, still dancing to the music in her head. "Come on, just one chorus?"

"Fine," Rory assented, yielding to her mother's whims.

"Jump in the line, rock your body in time," Lorelai sang, prodding Rory.

"O-kay, I believe you," she said, a frown still fixed on her face.

"Jump in the line, rock your body in time," Lorelai sang a little louder.

"Somebody help me!" Rory sang with a bit more enthusiasm.

Lorelai laughed. "Jump in the line, rock your body in time!"

"O-kay, I believe you!" Rory cried, starting to laugh too.

"Jump in the line, rock your body in time!" Lorelai and Rory sang together.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang, jolting them out of their song. Reality came rushing back.

Rory sighed. "So no way out?"

"I don't think so, hun. It might not be that bad, I mean, Grandma will be there and everything, plus you'll be staring at the stage for the majority of the evening. I'm sure it will be fine," Lorelai said reassuringly. "Ready?"

"I guess," Rory said, grabbing her purse as Lorelai opened the door.

"Hello, Lorelai," Emily said.

"Hi, Mom."

"You've met Logan Huntzberger, right?" Emily asked, gesturing to the young man beside her.

"Of course," Lorelai said. "Please, come in," she said in her hostess voice.

"Hello, Rory! My, that's a darling little dress," Emily said, looking Rory up and down approvingly.

"Thanks, Grandma," Rory said, eyeing Logan warily.

"Rory, nice to see you again," Logan said, a mischievous glint in his eye.

"Why, Logan, what a surprise to find you here!" Rory said, trying to keep her voice even.

"Well, you know Rory, it's the strangest thing," Emily said. "It turns out that your grandfather and I already had plans this Saturday night, and it completely slipped my mind! However, I found a suitable replacement, I hope you don't mind," she said with a smile.

"You could have called," Lorelai said pointedly.

"I was already in the car, and you know I don't talk and drive at the same time," Emily said, exasperated.

"Of course!" Lorelai said, barely containing her sarcasm.

"Well, we don't want to be late," Logan said, offering his arm.

Rory narrowed her eyes and took his arm, keeping her body as far away from his as she politely could.

"Well, you kids run along. Oh! And Rory, I almost forgot!" Emily said, scurrying out to her car.

Rory and Lorelai exchanged a look, shrugged, then followed Emily.

"Here you go," she said, lifting a bag out of her trunk.

"What's this, Grandma?" Rory asked.

"I took the liberty of packing you an overnight bag – we don't want you driving all the way back here so late at night with all those drunk drivers on the road!" Emily trilled, holding the bag out for Rory. Rory numbly took it, not knowing what else to do. "Separate rooms, Logan?" Emily warned in a teasing voice.

"Of course, Emily," he replied smoothly, taking Rory's bag. "Don't worry, your granddaughter is in safe hands."

Rory looked pleadingly at Lorelai, but Lorelai was in too much shock to offer much help. "Alright," she stammered, "well, you kids have fun, and call me tomorrow!"

"You'd better hurry – traffic!" Emily said, nudging them toward Logan's car.

"Ok, um, bye!" Rory said, resigned to her fate. She gave Logan a dirty look as he opened the car door for her. She slid in, tucking her skirt around her legs. This was going to be a long night.

* * *

Meanwhile, Emily walked back to the porch.

"So, Mom, I hope you fully stocked that overnight bag with everything Rory's going to need. Toothbrush, condoms, a dowry…" Lorelai said, trying to keep her tone light.

"Lorelai! Don't be crude. That boy is not going to take advantage of her – he's a Huntzberger! Besides, they don't even know each other that well, and I doubt Rory would let anyone, let alone a perfect stranger…deflower her," Emily said.

Lorelai decided whether or not to correct her mother on either of those statements, but she really didn't want to follow through with the ensuing conversations, so she let them slide.

"Right, so, I guess you better get to that thing with Dad, huh?" she said, arms folded across her chest as she stood blocking the front door.

"Actually, it got cancelled, so it looks like it's just us girls tonight! Feel like watching a movie?" Emily said, pushing past Lorelai and walking into her house.

Lorelai looked at her in astonishment. She sighed, then followed her inside.

* * *

Oh boy! An overnight bag? What was Emily thinking! Ok, so I know you guys had to wait entirely too long for this chapter, but I've already written the next one, it just needs some editing at this point.Oh yes, and helpful hint: the more reviews I get, the more likely it is that I will update soon. You know, prioritizing: write an English paper, or write a chapter in which Rory and Logan may have to spend the night together... I know which one I'd pick! So review please! Thank you, come again. :)


	8. Pass the Red Vines

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Hey, that whole "if you review it, she will write" thing works! So yay for you guys! This chappie isn't quite as pop culture driven, but don't worry, I've got tons of references stashed away for certain character interactions. Right now, I bet you're all dying to know what happens when a scheming Emily throws an unwilling Rory in Logan's path…with the promise of an overnight trip! Have fun! (And don't forget to check my profile for Gilmore-isms should you find a head-scratcher.)

* * *

CHAPTER 8: PASS THE RED VINES

* * *

"So…" Logan said as he drove down the road. He flashed Rory his patented charming smile. Rory looked away.

"Beautiful evening," he offered. Rory just stared out the window.

"I hear the new Ephalba is fantastic," he said. Still, Rory said nothing.

"Do you have a preference of radio stations?" Logan asked, gesturing to the dash. "Or I have a bunch of CDs if you'd like to choose one." Rory merely sighed, but gave no indication that she intended to respond.

Logan was running out of ideas, and was frankly miffed that Rory was not going to submit to his charm. "So, are you gonna Marcel Marceau your way through the evening, or what?"

"Not necessarily," Rory said, flipping down the visor and adjusting her hair. "I could communicate by whistle."

"Yeah, I don't think the Harpo approach is really gonna work for me," he said dryly.

"Oh, I'm so sorry," Rory said sarcastically, violently flipping the visor back into place. "What _is _going to work for _you_?"

Logan sighed. "If you really want to turn around and go back home, I'll understand, but we already have the tickets, and we're meeting other people there, so I'd rather not be rude if it's all the same to you."

"Fine," Rory said, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"Look," Logan said, "obviously you're not thrilled, which I can understand, but what exactly is it that pushes you into the land of the pissed off?"

Rory finally looked at him. "Oh, gee, I don't know, the fact that you arranged this… _with my grandmother_!"

"Ah," Logan said, suddenly understanding her animosity. "So… not the best way to get back into your good graces?" he offered.

"Possibly the worst," Rory agreed.

"Hm. Point taken," he said, pulling up to a stoplight. He tapped out a rhythm on the steering wheel with his thumbs. He suddenly noticed Rory was looking at him with a rather suspicious look on her face.

He looked around, making sure Rory was looking at him. "What?" he asked, laughter in his eyes.

"You're not going to kiss me now, are you?" she asked, one eyebrow raised.

"_What_?" he said, staring at her.

"Well," she said reasonably, "it just seems that when whatever method you're using to seduce me isn't working, then you just decide to kiss me. I was just going to say that it wouldn't be a good idea right now."

"Um… and why's that?" Logan said nervously.

"Because," Rory said simply, "the light's green."

Logan laughed, laying on the gas. "Rory Gilmore, you are somethin' else."

Rory allowed a small smile, but only because the ice was now broken. He still had a lot of work to do before she'd even _consider_ dating him again.

* * *

"So, what did you think?" Logan asked as the house lights went up in the Gershwin Theater. 

"Hey, I'm flying high, defying gravity!" Rory quipped from her seat.

"Aw, Ace, you gotta _sing_ when quoting songs," Logan said. "But for a musical, I'd say it was pretty good. What say you, boys?"

"Well…" Colin said thoughtfully. "Glinda was hot."

"I concur," Finn said seriously. "Where's the stage door, hm?"

Rory rolled her eyes. When Logan said they were meeting other people at the show, she should have known he meant Colin and Finn.

"I am _not_ going to help you stalk that poor girl," Rory said, hands on her hips.

"Alright, alright. So: what's next?" Finn said, rubbing his hands together.

"Well, I say we go for drinks, what do you think?" Logan suggested, standing up.

"Um, I'm not really in the mood for drinks," Rory said as Logan helped her with her coat.

"I'm sorry, love, I don't think I heard you right. How can you not be in the mood for drinks?" Finn asked incredulously, leading the group out of the theatre.

"Not all of us drink like fish, Finn," Logan chided, casually slinging his arm over Rory's shoulders and trying not to look affected when she shrugged it off.

"What about a club?" Colin suggested.

"Now it would take some _serious_ drinking to get me footloose and fancy free," Finn said, making a face.

"Whaddya say, Ace?" Logan asked.

"Let's hear it for the boy," she responded dryly.

Colin laughed. "Seriously?"

Rory smiled. "Actually, I'm a little tired," she admitted as their car pulled up.

"11:00 on a Saturday night and she's tired? Can you believe this, boys?" Colin said.

"Unbelievable," Finn agreed.

"Hey," she said defensively, "I stayed up pretty late last night. It was movie night at the Gilmore house, which meant movies until 3 a.m. complete with every kind of junk food imaginable. If Pinky and the Brain over here wanna go conquer the world, be my guest, but I'm down for the count."

"Now there's a good idea," Logan said, thoughtfully rubbing his chin.

"What?" Rory asked warily.

"A movie night," Logan said.

"I'm listening," Colin said as they all piled into the car.

"Where to?" asked the driver.

"Times Square, Frank," Logan said.

"Good Lord – why are we going to Times Square?" Finn asked in disgust.

"Because that's where the Virgin Megastore is," Logan explained.

"Ah," said Finn. "And do they have cocktails there?" he asked in a businesslike fashion.

"Or virgins?" Colin asked, wiggling his eyebrows. Rory hit him with her purse.

"They have coffee," Logan offered.

"Mate, we are having two totally different conversations here," Finn said, patting Logan on the shoulder.

"How about a compromise," Colin offered. "We can pick out the movies here, then destroy the minibar in the room, hm?"

"Well…" Finn said, considering the proposition.

"You can empty the entire minibar of my room…I won't be drinking it," Rory suggested as they exited the car.

"A kind offer indeed, miss," Finn said, clasping Rory's shoulder. "And one I shall most definitely be taking you up on."

Logan rolled his eyes. "After you," he said, gesturing for Rory to enter first. They walked into the store and headed for the DVD section.

"So what kind of movies are we feeling tonight?" Colin asked, browsing the shelves. He picked up a few DVDs. "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory? Transporter 2? Mr. and Mrs. Smith? Red Eye?"

Rory raised her eyebrows, clearly not agreeing his choices.

"No no no," Finn said in disgust. "We need a quality film. Like…" he perused the shelf. "Aha! Priscilla, Queen of the Desert."

Everyone looked at him.

"What?" Finn said innocently. "Too much Abba? Fine," he said, accepting their rejection gracefully.

"And that brings us back to my suggestions. So, Charlie or Red Eye?" Colin said, holding up the two DVDs.

"You know, I never did see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," said Logan.

Rory couldn't hold it in any longer. "Oh my God! Don't you people know how to watch movies?" she said, grabbing the movies from Colin's hands and putting them back on the shelves. "First off, we are not getting Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. If you're gonna do Roald Dahl, then we're going with Willy Wonka. Gene Wilder is the true Willy Wonka, and don't you forget it," she said, finding the 1971 version. "Ah, the songs," she sighed. She realized Colin and Logan were giving her weird looks. "Ok, moving right along…" she said, moving to another aisle. "Aha! Another classic. A Streetcar Named Desire."

"Ok, now I'm pretty sure that's a chick flick," Colin protested.

"Are you kidding me?" Rory said, holding it up. "It's Tennessee Williams! And let me tell you, Marlon Brando did _not_ do chick flicks. Besides," she said, "if I'm going to coerced into spending time with you lot, at the very least I should get to choose the movies," she said airly.

"Alright, alright," Logan said, holding his hands up. "So what is a Gilmore-approved movie night choice?" Logan teased.

"Well," Rory said, continuing to browse. "There's always Saturday Night Fever, especially appropriate since it's Saturday night."

"And we're in New York," Finn pointed out.

"But not Brooklyn," Colin said.

"Right, well, two out of three ain't bad," Rory said wryly. "What else… well, there's always Dirty Dancing if we're going with a theme," she said, considering the movie.

"Hey, did you hear that Patrick Swayze wants to cut a hip-hop album?" Logan said.

"Ridiculous!" Rory said.

"That's what his agent said," Colin said. "Hey, can't we have some guy movies? You know, good old-fashioned violence?" he whined. "Blood and guts, anything."

Rory made a face, putting Dirty Dancing back on the shelf. "Well if we're going to watch scary movies, it's not going to be one of these formulaic new ones," Rory scoffed. "You gotta go with the classics: let's see…aha, here we go. Rosemary's Baby and…The Shining. That ought to do it."

"Works for me," Colin said.

"Me as well," Finn said.

"Ok, I think we got enough movies for tonight," Logan said, taking the DVDs from Rory.

"But wait – how are we going to watch them?" Rory asked, confused.

"With the DVD player we're going to request at the hotel…duh!" Colin said.

"Right, of course. I forgot what it was like to be rich and privileged – my bad," Rory said wryly.

"Hey, don't knock it 'til you've tried it," Logan chided as they waited in line.

"So where are we going to get the food?" Rory asked.

"Well, the minibar ought to have some snacks in it," Colin said.

Rory laughed humorlessly. "Oh ye of little experience; I highly doubt the minibar will be stocked with the kind of food we're going to be eating."

Colin looked at her questioningly.

"Enlighten us, Ace," Logan said.

"Well," Rory said, "we need to find a mini-mart. Only there can we get the requisite comestibles." She began a list on her fingers. "We'll need cookie dough, marshmallows, peanut butter, M&Ms, popcorn, trail mix, and Red Vines. Gotta have the Red Vines."

"My God!" Colin said.

"Oh yeah. And that's just for Willy Wonka. We order pizza for Saturday Night Fever," Rory said nonchalantly.

"Well, you do have sophisticated tastes, don't you?" Logan teased.

"Hey, one more comment from you and I come down with the flu like _this_," Rory said, snapping her fingers.

"Ok, ok," Logan consented, paying for the DVDs before they all walked outside.

"Where's the car? I'm hungry now!" Finn cried.

"There," Colin pointed as Frank pulled up in front of them.

"Let's go!" Logan said, grabbing Rory's hand before she could protest. They ran to the limo and slipped inside, finding shelter from the cold night.

"Alright," Finn said. "Let's get this party started!"

* * *

"Ok, so there are two adjoining rooms, and the DVD player is in this one," Logan said, opening the door to a hotel room. He led the group inside and closed the door behind them, setting Rory's overnight bag next to the entertainment center. Finn immediately went to the minibar as Colin unwrapped the first movie, and Rory went to hang her coat up in the closet. 

"You know who we should have invited?" Finn said, opening a tiny bottle.

"Glinda?" Colin said suggestively.

"Well, yes, but not who I was thinking of," Finn said, taking a swig.

"Who?" Rory asked, perching on the edge of one of the two double beds.

"Your hot friend!" Finn said, offering her a sip. She declined with a shake of her head.

"Who, Paris?" Rory asked incredulously.

Logan guffawed, but stopped himself. "Sorry, go on," he said, sitting down on the other bed.

"No, love, your Asian beauty," Finn said, as if it were obvious.

"Ah, Lane. Not gonna happen, Finn," she said, tucking one leg underneath her.

"Oh, come on, why not? She's exotic, I'm exotic, it's a perfect match," he argued.

"Two good reasons, my friend: one, she's got a boyfriend, and two, you're not a Korean doctor," Rory explained again.

"Is her boyfriend a Korean doctor?" Finn queried.

"Well…not exactly," Rory said. "He's kind of in a rock band."

"Ha! Bloody brilliant!" Finn crowed. "When we get back, you call her and tell her I want to play MASH. She can be the Korean peasant, and I'll be the dashing young doctor who sweeps her off her feet despite the fact that we speak different languages," Finn said, getting lost in his fantasy.

"Hopeless; completely hopeless!" Rory said, standing up.

"Hey, where are you going?" Logan asked. "We're about to put in the first movie."

"Well," Rory said, rummaging through her overnight bag, "I can't very well enjoy movie night in a dress, especially considering the company, so I'm hoping Grandma packed me some pajamas." She looked through the bag. "Aha!" she said triumphantly. "Back in a moment," she said, going to the bathroom to change.

Once the door was shut, Colin and Finn looked at Logan.

"So…what's the next step in your grand plan?" Colin asked.

"Um…" Logan said, running his fingers through his hair. "Not entirely sure. Apparently she was none too thrilled about my working with her grandmother on this one, so I'm not clear on how to proceed at this point."

"Don't worry, mate, I've got an idea," Finn said.

Logan groaned. "Look, if it's anything like what you used to get that redhead last summer, I'm telling you right now, it is _not_ gonna work on Rory," he warned.

"Oh, give me _some_ credit," Finn said. "Now listen," he stage whispered to Colin. "When sleepytime comes, you and me will be passed out on the beds, alright?"

"Right," Colin whispered back. "Leaving you free to get your freak on next door," he said with a conspiratorial wink to Logan.

"Hey, I never said I was gonna try - " Logan started. He immediately stopped speaking when he heard the door open.

"Not gonna try what?" Rory asked innocently. When she found that all the guys were staring at her, she tugged on her top self-consciously. Trust her grandmother to only buy her the finest of silk pajamas. Perhaps she should have left her bra on, though it would have defeated the comfort issue.

"Um…" Logan said, his mouth suddenly dry. "Not gonna try…"

"My next little bottle here," Finn said, choosing a new bottle from the minibar. He took a sip. "Ugh! It's rubbish. Good thing you passed on the offer. Bloody disgusting," he said, setting it down. "Right: what's up first? Oompa Loompas or Stellaaaa!" he asked, flopping down on one of the beds. Colin grabbed a bottle for himself and settled on the other bed.

"Right, um, toss us a couple of pillows, would you?" Logan said, regaining control of his faculties.

"Sure," Colin said, throwing down two pillows. Logan offered one to Rory and they settled down on the floor at the end of Colin's bed.

"Let the fun begin!" Logan said, pressing play.

"Pass the Red Vines," Rory said enthusiastically as they settled back against the bed.

* * *

Two movies later, and true to their word, Colin and Finn were passed out on the beds. Logan was the last one awake; Rory fell asleep about ten minutes earlier. Logan glanced at her. She was still sitting beside him, but she had slumped over a bit, her head leaning on his shoulder. He smiled. She didn't seem quite so ferocious when she was asleep. He reached for the remote and turned off the movie, staying as quiet as possible. 

"Ace," he whispered, lifting his shoulder a bit, nudging her head.

"Mmphf," she mumbled, shifting her head closer to his neck. He grinned, filing that away under things he wouldn't let her forget.

"Ok, come on," he said, sliding her off of his shoulder and standing up. "Time for bed," he said.

"Nooo," moaned Rory, trying to lay down on the pillows.

"Come on," Logan repeated, pulling her up with him.

Rory seemed to wake up a little more. "Nooo, sleep…" she said, trying to lay down on the nearest bed.

"No!" Logan said, pulling her with him. "Someone's already sleeping there, Ace." He sighed. "Oh…what the hell," he said to himself, picking her up. She instinctively put her arms around his neck. Her head drooped onto his shoulder. He smiled and carried her to the door that joined the two rooms, managing to open it with the arm that was underneath her legs. He pulled the door closed behind them and surveyed the room in the moonlight.

"Oh no," he groaned.

"Hmm?" Rory said, pulled awake as Logan set her down.

"Um…ok, so, just so you know, I didn't plan this, ok? So don't read anything into it?" he said cautiously.

"Logan, it's late, I'm tired, and…" Rory trailed off when she saw what he was referring to. "Aw, man!"

They both stood there, just looking at the king size bed in the middle of the room.

"If you want, I can sleep on the floor," Logan offered.

Rory yawned and thought for a moment. "No, that's ridiculous. We can share," she said sleepily, climbing onto the bed and slipping under the sheets.

Logan's eyes lit up. "Well, alright then!" he exclaimed, starting to take off his shoes.

"But," Rory said.

"But?" Logan asked, looking up, one foot in the air.

"You stay on your side, got it?" she warned.

"Got it," Logan agreed, pulling off his shoe. He started to unbutton his shirt.

"Whoa whoa whoa!" Rory said. "What are you doing?" she asked in alarm.

"Getting ready for bed," Logan said. He noticed her look. "What?"

"You don't by any chance…um…" Rory said nervously.

"What?" Logan asked, a blank look on his face. He suddenly guessed at the source of her discomfort and began to laugh. "No, Ace, I don't sleep in the nude. Geez, are you always this jittery in bed?"

"No," Rory harrumphed, sliding further underneath the covers.

Logan smirked and finished unbuttoning his shirt, draping it over a chair. When he started to undo his belt, Rory squeezed her eyes shut, her cheeks turning pink. She didn't open them until she felt the bed shift under Logan's weight.

"So…" Rory said.

"So…" Logan replied. "Here we are," he said softly.

"Yep," Rory said succinctly. "Um…you weren't kidding, right? I mean, you are wearing…"

"Boxers, yes I am," Logan said dryly. "Is that ok with you?" he said with a smirk.

"Yes; I don't care what you wear," Rory said huffily, turning so she lay on her side facing away from him.

"Uh huh," Logan said in a tone that let her know he didn't believe her. "Just wanted to make sure I wasn't getting you all hot and bothered," he said.

Rory snorted in derision. "Oh please. Don't flatter yourself."

Logan smiled. He knew that he was getting to her. He leaned up close, not quite touching her, but close enough that if she moved even an inch they would be touching from top to bottom. "Goodnight, Ace," he whispered in her ear. He grinned before rolling back to his side of the bed.

Rory shivered, feeling his breath so close to her ear, remembering what it felt like when he used to kiss her there. But before she had time to contemplate that, she drifted off to sleep…

* * *

Logan woke up first. He yawned and then started to stretch, back flat on the bed, until he realized that something was impeding his movement. He shifted slightly and realized that somehow in the middle of the night, Rory had rolled over to his side of the bed. She was currently draped over him, one leg thrown over his and one arm across his middle. Her head was resting on his chest in the crook of his shoulder, her ear right over his heartbeat. Logan was surprised to find that he had one arm wrapped around her and the other was resting on her hand. He looked down at their hands, and slowly intertwined their fingers. Rory shifted and snuggled closer. He grinned as he contemplated how best to wake her for maximum embarrassment. 

"Ro-ry…" he whispered in a sing-song voice, kissing her forehead.

"Mmm," she mumbled.

"Ro-ry," he sang again.

"Five more minutes…" she groaned. As her awareness grew, she began to realize where she was…and more importantly, who she was with. Her eyes flew open as she realized that despite all her harsh words the night before, she was currently wrapped around a very smug Logan Huntzberger. She started to pull away.

"Oh no you don't," Logan said, tightening his grip. "I like you like this," he said, laying his head back down. She reluctantly relaxed against him, trying to ignore that his thumb was tracing slow patterns on her palm, and more importantly, trying to ignore the fact that a _very_ thin layer of silk was separating her from a practically naked Logan.

"Like what," she said, closing her eyes again. She could hear his heartbeat.

"Just… quiet. Relaxed. Beautiful," he said. A slow smile spread across her face, though she hoped to God he couldn't feel it against his chest – which, of course, he could.

"You like your women tranquil and submissive?" she deadpanned, just in case.

"Ace, can you just enjoy the moment sans sarcasm?" he asked. He felt her grin.

Logan closed his eyes. "You wanna know something funny?" he asked.

"Ha-ha funny or weird funny?" she said.

"I suppose weird funny," he replied.

"Always," she said.

"This is the first time I've ever woken up with a girl," he said frankly.

"Seriously?" Rory said, lifting her head to look at him.

"Seriously," he said, his eyes remaining closed. "I mean, not to be all male and talking about former conquests or anything, it's just that…I've never been much of the intimacy type. I've never wanted to wake up with a girl, or really just… just hold a girl before," he admitted.

"Wow," Rory said, not knowing what else to say. They lay there for awhile, neither wanting to break the unspoken truce that seemed to have come about.

The moment ended when there was a knock at the room-adjoining door. "Oy, you got any aspirin over there? It's just that Colin's puking his guts out and he's giving me a splitting headache and we can't find – what? Where? Well why didn't you say so? Bloody hell, we could be interrupting…right, um, nevermind!" Finn said from the other side of the door. They heard his feet padding away.

Logan groaned and opened his eyes. "Way to ruin a moment, Finn," he said.

"Um, that's ok, I think I'm going to take a shower anyway," Rory said, sitting up. Logan reluctantly let go of her hand, bringing his free hand to trace her face.

"I meant it, you know," he said.

"What?" Rory half-whispered, her eyes locked on his.

"You are beautiful," he said, staring intensely at her.

Rory was mesmerized, but needed to break the spell. After all, he couldn't just sweet talk her and make everything okay again. She was just confused; he sounded so sincere.

"Logan," she said softly.

"Right, shower," he said, slowly dropping his hand from her face. "Go," he urged her. "I need to check on the guys anyway. Besides, we've got to plan the day."

Rory slid off the bed. "Plan the day? Aren't we just going back home?"

"Hey, the date ain't over yet," Logan said with a wink.

"Hold on, I only signed up for a show," Rory teased. "You're lucky I'm still here."

"I sure am," Logan said with a wink. "Now go take your shower already. Or do you need some help?" he said suggestively, sitting up.

Rory took one look at his naked torso and backed toward the shower. "I'm going! I'm going!" she said, slipping into the bathroom.

As soon as the door closed, Logan flopped back down on the bed, resting his hands behind his head and grinning widely. His plan was back on track: now he could start Phase II of his scheme…

* * *

Well, goodness gracious me! What could Phase II be? Looks like Rory might be letting her guard down, but Logan's gonna have to work for it. And what is going on with all the other characters in the Gilmore universe? I mean, Dean knows that Rory and Logan never slept together. Do you think he's going to exploit that fact? (You'd better believe it. Homeboy's not gone for good!) Haha! I'm evil and I know it. Now pretty please review so I know you think this story is worth continuing. (Ok, so I'm gonna finish it anyway because I can't abide unfinished fics, but don't you want the next chapter to come out before we're 80? I thought so.) 


	9. The 24 Hour Date

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **FINALLY! Am I the only person who was insanely excited that we had our first _really_ good Gilmore episode this season? (1/31/06, Friday Night's Alright for Fighting.) I mean, let's be real, folks. I've watched faithfully every episode and watched in despair as Rory behaved more and more un-Rory-like and the writers cooked up a daughter for Luke to throw a kink in the perfect relationship, but things are finally looking up. Rory is back to her take-charge Yale self, Logan is back in her life and actually having interesting things to do, and the Friday night dinners are reinstated. Phew. And, I guess, if you have to have a long-lost daughter thrown in the mix, Vanessa Marano is making her a likeable character. Ok, now I'm really off my soapbox. By the way, did anyone else catch the Punxatawny Phil reference? I can proudly say that I threw mine in a couple of chapters ago. GMTA! Alright, so now that I've done my dance of glee for thinking like the GG writers, on with the story! (And, as always, check the Gilmore-isms on my profile for your clarification needs.)

* * *

CHAPTER 9: THE 24-HOUR DATE

* * *

"…And so then her grandma pulls up in the driveway, and do you know what?" Babette said. 

"What?" Patty asked, leaning in.

"She wasn't the only one there!" Babette confided, leaning on the street corner mailbox. Just then, Dean came walking down the sidewalk. He grinned and shook his head at the ladies sharing their latest news.

"Well who else was there? Rory's grandpa?" Patty asked. Dean stopped and slipped around the side of the building upon hearing Rory's name, figuring this gossip session might be of interest to him.

"It was a stranger… a man!" Babette said, slapping her hand down on the mailbox for emphasis.

"A man!" Patty said.

"Yeah! Young, blond, good-lookin' kid," Babette said. "I mean, if I was twenty years younger, woof!"

Around the corner, Dean's eyes narrowed. He had a pretty good guess who the blond was.

"Well who was he?" Patty pressed.

"Apparently, someone her grandma was tryin' to set her up with. She said something about not being able to keep her plans with Rory. She was sendin' that hunk in her place."

"My, my," Patty said.

"And that ain't even the best part," Babette said excitedly.

"Oh really?" Patty said.

"Yeah. I mean, this kid was cute as he could be, but it was plain as day that our Rory did _not_ wanna go with him," Babette continued.

Dean looked surprised. So, Rory wasn't dating the rich kid. Interesting. Perhaps he placed enough doubt in Rory's mind that she broke up with him…or perhaps the guy really was an idiot and blew her off. Either way, things were looking pretty good for Dean. He slipped away before the most interesting part, missing Babette's last words.

"And do you know what her grandma did?" Babette said.

"What?" Patty asked.

"She handed that kid a bag and told Rory that she packed her an overnight bag cuz she didn't want them driving home in the middle of the night. Rory was spending the night in New York City with a boy!" Babette said.

* * *

"You know what? This has been an amazing day," Rory said. She was sitting in a trendy coffee shop in Manhattan, feeling very hip yet relaxed. 

"Don't sound so surprised," Logan said wryly, lifting his cup to his lips.

"I'm sorry," Rory said with a sheepish grin. "It's just… it's like somehow you knew _exactly_ what to do today. Quite frankly, I am amazed."

"Yes, well, I realized that the first step was to send Colin and Finn home. I mean, the day was much more pleasant without Dumb and Dumber, right?" Logan said.

"It was," Rory agreed. "I have a hard time seeing Finn give the Inside CNN tour its proper respect. We would have been one bomb scene from Meet the Parents away from getting kicked out."

"Yeah, and we wouldn't have been able to tear Colin away from Baywatch at the Museum of Television and Radio," Logan pointed out.

"True," Rory said. She took a sip of coffee. "So, what's next? I mean, there's a lot of pressure here. The day has been so perfect so far that it would be very easy to screw it up."

She was interrupted by Logan's cell phone ringing. "I'm sorry, excuse me one moment," Logan said apologetically, answering his phone.

"Yeah?" he answered.

"_Logan! How goes Phase II?"_ Colin said from the other end.

"Still going, but I'd say it's just about done," Logan said casually.

"_I see. So, she's sitting right there, huh?"_

"Yup," Logan said.

"_So, have you used your considerable charm and monetary influence to give Gilmore the perfect day?"_ Colin asked.

"Something like that," Logan said dryly.

"_Excellent. So now you've achieved Phase II: get her to at least consider dating you. Get into her good graces. Now what happens in Phase III? Get into her pants?" _Colin snickered.

"Bye, Colin," Logan said pointedly.

"_Alright, alright, alright. I just wanted to let you know that everything is all set up on my end for tonight. You have dinner reservations for two, though I still can't understand why you chose that provincial establishment, and the rest of the evening is set."_

"Thanks, bro. I'll call you later," Logan said.

"_Yeah, you do that. Bye,_" Colin said, hanging up.

"Sorry about that," Logan said, putting his phone away.

"It's fine," Rory said. She folded her arms and leaned on the table. "So, what's next?" she asked, surprised to find herself genuinely excited.

"Now we fly," Logan said, offering his hand to help her up.

Rory accepted, regarding him curiously. "Fly?"

"Fly," he said with a wink.

* * *

"Oh my God, you were being literal," Rory said, viewing the helicopter pad with trepidation. 

"You're not afraid of flying, are you?" Logan taunted.

"Please," Rory said. "I've been to Europe and back…twice. I think I can handle a little ol' helicopter," she said.

"Great, hop in," Logan said.

"Oh boy," Rory said under her breath. She put on a brave face as he opened the door.

"So, you've got umbrellas in case we fall out, right?" she jested.

"Yeah, we're going skydiving, didn't I tell you?" Logan teased back.

Rory shook her head. She climbed into the helicopter, getting all buckled up. She gasped when she saw Logan take the controls.

"You've got to be kidding me," she said.

"What?" Logan asked, adjusting the equipment.

"You are _not_ going to fly this thing. I am so getting out," she said, beginning to unbuckle her seatbelt.

"Relax," Logan drawled. "I have done this before, you know."

"No, I don't know. Suddenly you're going all Harrison Ford on me; do you plan on rescuing any wayward hikers while we're in this thing? And by the way, didn't you sink a yacht?" Rory countered.

"That was different," Logan said airily. "Are you strapped in?"

"Yes," Rory said meekly.

"Alright, then. Let's go!" he said, lifting off.

* * *

"Ok, now tell me that wasn't amazing," Logan said, helping Rory climb out of the helicopter. 

"Marginally," she admitted, a little shaky.

"Marginally? Ace, I'm wounded. Here I get you home faster than you could have imagined, and all I get is a 'marginally amazing?'"

"Well…" Rory said, dusting herself off. "Alright, then, _amazing_ amazing."

"Thank you," Logan said, satisfied.

"One of your many hidden talents, I assume," Rory teased.

"Oh, I _do_ have many," Logan said suggestively, running his finger down her bare arm.

Rory swatted him away. "Although…" she said, trailing off.

"Although what?" Logan asked defensively, crossing his arms.

"Well, don't you need a bomber jacket? I mean, the sunglasses I could forgive, but the jacket completes the Cruise image," Rory teased.

"New topic," Logan said, playfully throwing his arm around her shoulders as they walked away from the helicopter. He was pleased when she didn't shrug it off.

"Ok. Question," Rory said.

"What?"

"How are we getting back to Yale? I mean, I assume we're not flying from Stars Hollow," Rory said.

"Come on, Ace. Don't you trust me yet?" Logan asked, squeezing her shoulder.

"The jury's still out on that one," Rory said sardonically.

"Well I'll work on that," Logan said good-naturedly. "Now let's go to dinner."

"Dinner? Where?"

* * *

They walked into Luke's Diner and sat down at a reserved table. 

"Tell me something: out of all the restaurants in New York that you could have chosen from, with Zagat's help, mind you, you're taking me to Luke's?" Rory asked incredulously.

Logan shrugged. "I remember they have excellent cheeseburgers. And you do like cheeseburgers, do you not?" Logan said.

"Yes, I do. But question number two: how in the world did you get Luke to reserve a table for two? I mean, he does not do that," Rory insisted.

"Hey, just relax and enjoy, hm?" Logan said, opening a menu.

"This has been one crazy day," Rory said, shaking her head.

"Good crazy?" Logan asked.

"Yeah…good crazy," Rory said, giving him a slow smile.

"Good," he said, trying not to look too pleased.

* * *

"So you're enjoying your 24-hour date?" Logan said, pushing his dessert away. He was beyond stuffed. 

"Wow, I guess it has been 24 hours," Rory said, looking at her watch as she took another bite of pie.

"Well, you know what they say…time flies –" Logan started.

"When you're being forced to spend time with someone?" Rory finished sweetly.

"Well, when you put it like that," Logan tried to joke. He tried not to let her implications bother him. "You know, you didn't actually have to… I mean, you could have gone home at any time, all you had to do was say the word," he said earnestly.

"I know," Rory said slyly, taking a sip of her coffee. "It's actually been really fun."

"Oh yeah?" Logan said. "So, it wouldn't be totally inappropriate to call this a date, now, would it?"

"I suppose it's within the realm of possibility," she admitted airily.

"A very strong possibility?" Logan insisted.

"Oh, fine. You win. I officially went on a date with the great Logan Huntzberger," she said melodramatically.

"Well, I mean, the label's not important," Logan said, teasing her.

"Wretch!" Rory said, throwing her napkin at him.

"Hey!" he protested. He suddenly got a mischievous gleam in his eye as he nudged his dessert plate closer.

"You wouldn't dare," Rory said in a low voice. Their eyes locked in a challenging stare before Logan broke the gaze.

"You're right, I wouldn't," he admitted. Before she could make any kind of triumphant gesture, he continued. "I've seen Luke – I wouldn't start a food fight in his restaurant. I truly believe he can take me, and I'm not ashamed to admit it," he said, his mouth beginning to curve into a smile.

"Now _that_ I agree with," Rory said, sitting back in her chair. They laughed.

* * *

"So…" Logan said, holding the door open for Rory. 

"Thank you," she said, stepping out of the diner. "So…what?" she prompted.

"So, good date?" Logan said as they walked down the sidewalk.

"Good date," Rory said in a demure voice.

Logan smiled. "I mean, technically, one could say we slept together. That definitely constitutes a date, and not just a good one – a great one!"

"Shut up," Rory said, raising her hand to smack him in the chest. Logan caught it mid air, but didn't let it go. Instead, he let their hands drift down between them, interlacing their fingers and holding hands as they strolled down the sidewalk.

"So you think we could make this a regular thing?" Logan asked casually.

"What, sleeping together?" Rory said. She couldn't help but laugh when Logan stopped dead-still, needing time to recover.

"Um, well, that too," he said, starting to walk again when Rory tugged on his hand. "Seriously, though."

"Seriously? I don't know," Rory said.

"You do know I meant dating, right?" Logan said, trying to clarify.

Rory grinned. "Yeah, I know what you meant."

"I'm not messing around, Ace. I mean it," Logan said.

"I'm sure you think you do, it's just that you're not a commitment guy, and I accept it, I really do, and it's fine. You can't be something you're not, I get it," she said, trying to shove her emotions down one layer.

"Rory, stop," Logan said, stopping in the middle of the sidewalk and not budging. She slowly stepped one step closer, their hands still locked together.

"You called me Rory," she said.

"I want to be clear," Logan said, a smile hinting at his lips. "Rory, I really wanna be your boyfriend," Logan said.

"And I really wanna believe you," she replied earnestly, "but it's a little hard to believe, given your track record."

"Well how else am I gonna change unless you give me a chance?" Logan reasoned.

"I don't know," Rory said hesitantly.

Logan regarded her for a moment, an idea slowly forming in his head. "Tell you what. There's this killer band playing tonight, I figured we could go see the concert after dinner so I've already got tickets, if that's ok with you," Logan said.

Rory nodded slowly, not exactly sure where he was going with this.

"I can guarantee you will like the band that is playing. In fact, I am so damn sure about the fact that you will love this band that I am willing to bet everything on it," Logan said with a gleam in his eye.

"Oh really?" Rory said playfully. "Everything as in a million dollars, or whatever you're worth?"

"No," Logan said with a grin. "Everything as in total commitment. You love this band, and I am all in. You hate it, and I promise to leave you alone forever. Whaddya say, Ace?"

Rory raised one eyebrow. "Wow. Such confidence. I suppose I'll have to take that bet. But usually isn't a bet a reflexive thing? Like, you know, you win, I give you a dollar. I win, you give me a dollar," Rory said. "I mean, no offense, but you've already demonstrated that you want to be a boyfriend, though I doubt your ability to do so."

"Ok, how 'bout this?" Logan offered. "If you don't love the band, then I will leave you alone and give you a dollar. You love this band, and you promise to give me a chance. And a dollar."

"_Or_ how about this: we wager on the band and consider our relationship separate territory," Rory countered.

"Our relationship?" Logan said with a raised eyebrow.

"You know what I mean," Rory said brushing it off. She sighed as Logan pulled her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. Damn him, he already knew her so well.

"Oh no you don't. You can't back off after saying something like 'our relationship,'" Logan said.

"Well…sure I can. It's my prerogative as a woman," Rory said. "What can I say, I'm a fickle kid."

"Hey, you brought it up," Logan said. "Not to be all estrogen-y, but where do we stand, exactly?"

Rory sighed and thought about it, playing with one of the buttons on his shirt. She focused on the button. "Well… your determination is admirable, I'll give you that," she said, looking up briefly.

Logan nodded his thanks.

"And," she continued, still focusing on the button. "I suppose it wouldn't hurt to give you a chance…" she said with a shrug.

Logan broke out into a grin.

"…just to woo me, you understand," Rory said, extricating herself from his arms and backing away as Logan began to advance on her.

"To woo you?" Logan said, taking a step forward.

"Yes," Rory replied, walking backwards.

"How do you mean?" he asked, still walking toward her.

"I mean give you a chance to prove that you really can do it. Not, like, poof, you're my boyfriend, but rather try dating exclusively," she said, backing up until she hit a wall and could back up no further.

"I could do that," Logan said, getting really close to her and putting his hands on either side of her on the wall. "I'm sure I could successfully woo you," he said, leaning forward to kiss her neck.

"Oh, God," she whined. She put her hands on his chest, slightly pushing him away. "You're not going to get all cocky on me, are you? Because I can take it all back," she said quite seriously.

"No!" Logan said, stepping back and dropping his hands to his sides. "No, I'm glad you're giving me a chance. That's a good start."

"A good start? My, aren't we confident," Rory said.

"Yes, well, speaking of confidence, back to the band issue, now that we're clear about 'our relationship,'" he said with a smirk.

"Oh God. I should have taken it back," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

"Too late now, babe. You're into me, and I know it," he said smugly.

"Bite me," Rory said sarcastically.

"All in good time, Ace," Logan said with a wink. "Now, as I was saying. Back to the band issue. Straight up bet: if you don't love this band, I will do whatever you say. If you do love this band, you do whatever I say. Deal?"

"No way!" Rory said, folding her arms across her chest. "Waaaay too much room for creativity there."

"What, are you chicken?" Logan taunted.

"Frankly, yes," Rory said. "We need specific terms."

"Alright, well, you name your terms and I'll name mine," Logan suggested.

"Ok," Rory said, thinking. "Got it! If I don't love this band, which, by the way, the odds are in my favor as I am very picky, you have to mow my lawn," she said triumphantly.

"You don't have a lawn," Logan said, confused.

"My _mother's_ lawn," she clarified. "My house here in Stars Hollow. Oh yeah, and you can't hire somebody to do your dirty work, ohhhh no. You have to physically mow it yourself for…a month. Without John Deere's help."

"Wow, I think you enjoyed that a little too much," Logan said.

"Hey, you said name my terms," she said defensively.

"I know, I know," Logan said, holding his hands up. "Are you ready to hear my terms?" he asked.

"Fire away," Rory said.

"Ok. If you do, in fact, love this band, which you say is a near impossibility, then you have to spend the night with me."

"What?" Rory said. "Ok, first of all, I am _not_ dealing in sexual favors here, and second of all, I've already spent the night with you, so what's the big deal?"

"I never said you had to _do_ anything," Logan said. "Just spend the night with me. And the circumstances will be slightly different."

"Ok, well, that still sounds a little too vague for my liking, but seeing as how I probably won't have to, I suppose I can agree," she said loftily.

"Good," Logan said with a smirk. "Oh – a week."

"Huh?" Rory said, confused.

"You have to spend the night with me for a week," he said.

"Fine. I just hope you have some yardwork clothes in that wardrobe of yours. Otherwise we'll have to go shopping," Rory said airily, starting to walk away.

Logan grinned and trailed behind her. "As much fun as that would be, Ace, I don't think I'm gonna have to worry about that."

"We'll see," Rory said.

"Yes we will," Logan said quietly, trying to hide his smile.

* * *

Dean was on his way home when he passed the music store. A flyer caught his eye, and he backed up. He read the flyer. "Huh," he said to himself. Rory was sure to be there, and since he knew that she was no longer with that billionaire guy, he might just have a shot…

* * *

"I can't believe you," Rory said, shaking her head in amazement. She surveyed the room, watching people screaming and dancing in front of the stage where a band was jamming. 

"What?" Logan asked innocently.

"This is like cheating!" she protested.

"No way. This was totally legit. Cheating would have been calling your mother, which let me tell you, I was dangerously close to doing, but I managed to plan the day without her," Logan replied.

"I don't think this should count," Rory said, folding her arms.

"Oh yes it should," Logan said, not letting her out of the bet. "So, are you saying you like the band? Possibly, _love_ the band?"

"Hep Alien?" Rory said incredulously. "Of course I do! I'm practically _required_ to. You are tricky, mister," she said, shaking her finger at him.

"Hey, all's fair in love and war," Logan said.

"And which is this?" Rory asked, hands on hips.

"You tell me," Logan said, slipping one hand around her waist and the other onto her cheek, leaning in for a kiss.

"There you are!" Colin said, coming up to them, interrupting the moment.

"Your timing, as usual, is impeccable," Logan said dryly, withdrawing his hands and sliding them into his pockets.

"Thank you, thank you," Colin replied with a bow. "And Rory: two nights in a row. Must be love, huh?" he said with a wink.

"Hey Beavis, where's Butthead?" Logan said, distracting Colin from his line of questioning.

"Now, now, play nice," Colin said. "Finn's around here somewhere."

"Something tells me that 'somewhere' is probably the bar," Rory said wryly.

"Something tells me you're right," Colin said amiably. "And I believe I shall head there myself. I take my leave of you – now, you kids behave," he said, walking away before they could come up with any snappy comebacks.

"Actually, a drink sounds really good right about now. You want anything, Ace?" Logan asked.

Rory thought a moment. "Um…yeah. I think I want a Coke. I'm gonna go squeeze up to the front and try to get Lane to wave at me. Meet you back here?" she asked.

"It's a date," Logan said with a wink. Rory smiled and started to walk away, but he grabbed her hand.

"What?" she asked.

"Well…considering our new status, doesn't any kind of parting imply a kiss of some sort?"

"That has no bearing on our current situation," Rory said. "Besides…"

Logan raised his eyebrows. "Besides what?"

"Well," Rory said, playing with the hem of her shirt, "I mean, if we're starting over, you know, this is sort of still our first date, and doesn't a kiss come at the end?"

"Oh, so that's how we're lookin' at it?" Logan asked with a smirk.

"Well that's how _I'm_ lookin' at it," Rory said.

"I like the way you look," Logan said with a wink.

Rory started to respond, but wasn't sure which way he meant it, so she just smiled. "Back in a minute," she said, squeezing his hand and then making her way to the front of the crowd. Logan chuckled and shook his head before walking to the bar.

* * *

"Lane!" Rory shouted. She could barely hear anything the way the amps were cranked up. "Lane!" 

She gave up temporarily and started dancing with the crowd. She suddenly bumped into someone.

"Oh, sorry," Rory said, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"No, it's ok…"

"Dean?" Rory said. She suddenly stopped dancing.

"Rory? Hey," Dean said with practiced casualness. He took her elbow and led her away from the throng to stand along the wall. "How've you been?"

"Um…fine," Rory said uncomfortably.

"Look, about the last time we…" Dean started. Rory just folded her arms across her chest. "I just thought maybe you'd want to start over. Try being friends. What do you say?" he asked.

"I don't know, Dean. I mean, I think we've run out of things to say to each other," she said, looking at her feet.

"Well, I mean, when we broke up the first time and decided to be friends, we were still in high school. We were immature back then."

Rory just looked at him.

"Ok, _I _was immature," Dean admitted with a wry smile. His face got more serious. "But seriously, Rory, don't you think there's still a chance that we can get past all of this and become friends? We're getting a little old for all this drama," Dean said, grasping at straws.

Rory laughed. "I'm sorry, have you met my mother? Or my grandparents, for that matter? You're never too old for drama."

"True, true," Dean said. They stood there for a moment. "Tell ya what," he said. "The winter carnival is this weekend. If I happen to bump into you, I'll say hi, and hopefully you'll say hi. I'll even bring Clara. You can't not say hi to Clara," Dean said.

"Well…that's true," Rory said slowly.

"Yeah, and if you say hi to Clara, she's going to say hi back, and inevitably invite you to play at least one game with us," Dean said with a smile.

"That's also true; she'll at least want to get our fortunes told together," Rory said.

"By the lady who always tell you you'll be rich and famous," Dean continued.

"You know, I always knew she was for real," Rory said with a grin.

Dean smiled back. "So, maybe I'll bump into you this weekend and politeness might turn into friendliness, hm?"

Rory grinned. "It's a distinct possibility. But I might only hang out with Clara. You'll have to be our food fetcher."

"You can depend on me for all your snowcone needs," Dean said.

Rory smiled. "Well, I need to get back to my friends, so, I guess I'll see you this weekend."

"Oh, ok. I didn't realize you were here in a group," Dean said amiably.

"Yeah," Rory said, slightly nervous. "Um, just a couple of friends from Yale."

"Ok, well, I'll let you get back to them. See you around," Dean said.

"See ya," Rory said with a small wave. She entered the crowd once more and went to the back to find Logan.

* * *

Dean wondered who she was here with. Probably just that Marty guy, who seemed harmless enough. He craned his neck over the crowd and watched Rory. His eyes narrowed as he saw that blond jerk hand her a drink. He curled his hands into fists at his side when he saw Rory laugh at something Logan said. Well…he would just have to show her how great they were together this weekend. After all, there was nothing like a Stars Hollow tradition to remind Rory that she and Dean belonged together. He left the club, forming a plan.

* * *

"Hey, Ace, what took you so long?" Logan asked, handing her a Coke. "Did you get Lane's attention?" 

"No," Rory said. "I doubt she heard me over all the other screaming dancing people. They're getting quite a following!"

"They're pretty good," Logan said. "I can see why you can't help but love them," he said with a smirk, making reference to their bet.

"Yes, yes, we've established that I love them, you win, now get over it," Rory said dryly, taking a sip of Coke.

"I think I'd like to revel in this moment, if it's all the same to you," Logan said.

"Fine," Rory said airily. "Of course, I can always decide that I'm the kind of girl who doesn't kiss on a first date."

"What?" Logan said.

"That's right, mister. You behave or I'm withholding kissing privileges," Rory said with an evil grin.

"That's ok," Logan said easily.

"Why?" Rory said, miffed.

"Because," Logan said, taking the drink from her hand and setting it on a nearby counter, "I'll just steal them instead."

Before Rory could react, Logan slipped his hands on either side of her face and brought his lips crashing down onto hers. She immediately began to kiss him back, holding onto his shoulders for dear life.

"Get a room, you guys," Colin said, returning to the group.

Rory and Logan slowly broke apart, both slightly breathing heavy.

"My God, it looks like he's going to achieve Phase III, and soon!" Finn said conspiratorially. Colin choked with laughter.

"Why, what's Phase III?" Rory said, her eyes narrowing.

"Wow, would ya look at the time?" Logan said. "We should probably head back to school, seeing as how tomorrow morning our weekend comes to an abrupt end."

His segue worked enough to distract Rory. "Yeah, how exactly _are_ we getting home?" she asked Logan.

"Boys," Logan gestured to Colin and Finn.

"Right, let's go," Finn said, pulling the keys from his pocket.

"Give me the keys," Colin said, grabbing them out of Finn's hand. "The last thing you need is another DUI. You need to remember that you can't flirt your way out of them if the officer is male."

"I can if he's gay; give me back my keys!" Finn said.

"You'll have to pry them out of my cold dead hands," Colin said, starting to jog.

"Oy!" Finn cried, running after Colin. "You run like a bloody girl! Come back here!"

Rory and Logan just looked at each other. "It's ok," Logan said. "Let Bert and Ernie duke it out. They'll tire themselves out and I'll end up driving; it's the same way every time."

"Ah," Rory said with a smile.

Logan held out his hand.

"Ready, Ace?" Logan said.

Rory looked at his hand for a moment; the question having a deeper meaning for her. Was she ready to trust Logan? She looked into his eyes and took his hand. "Yeah, I'm ready," she said softly but firmly.

Logan smiled and squeezed her hand. "Well come on! They're gonna leave without us – it's happened before," he said, pulling her along with him. She laughed as they ran to the car.

* * *

Wow! So, Rory thinks she can trust Logan...but can she? And what is Dean's plan? Yes, yes, I'm evil, I know. But this chapter was just a set up for a way more interesting chapter next time. What's going to happen, you ask? Too bad you can't get a SpoilerFix for fanfic! Ok, ok, so we'll make a "Next time, on **The Fortune Cookie's Always Right**: What happens when Rory's trust in Logan is tested by a questionable situation? Is she really going to spend every night for the next week in Logan's bed? And in Stars Hollow, what is Dean going to do at the Winter Carnival? And what happens when Finn tries (unsuccessfully) to date Lane? Tune in next time..." And you know the way things work around here... the more reviews the better! The numbers keep climbing, and I thank y'all for that! So if there are...say... **40** reviews, there might be another update before the weekend is over... 


	10. Let's Get Physical or not

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **Ok, so I've been distracted from writing this chapter by another television show. I know, traitorous, right? But this show is _verrrry_ close to as good as Gilmore. Anybody remember "Due South"? It's a 90s show about a Canadian mountie and a Chicago cop. It has a catchy theme song, plots that are obviously good enough to distract me, and witty banter that you totally wouldn't expect. This, of course, is totally unrelated. On to the main point: YOU GUYS ROCK! My fantabulous reviewers! Can I just say how jazzed I was to find that I had over 40 reviews the very same night I posted! And I was inspired by many of the posts. For example, one reviewer inspired a limerick, while others inspired plot points (some to come in the future). So as I watch EastEnders, I post this next chappie for you guys. And hey, technically, it's still this weekend for another 30 minutes!

* * *

CHAPTER 10: LET'S GET PHYSICAL...OR NOT

* * *

Rory woke up and was slightly disoriented. She wondered why she was sleeping on her side…she never slept on her side. She opened one eye to see a dorm room wall…but it wasn't her room! She opened both eyes and searched for an alarm clock. Her eyes landed on one on a nearby table. She suddenly knew where she was. She smiled at Logan's arm wrapped protectively around her, though he was fast asleep. She could feel his even breathing on her neck, where his head was buried. She decided to slip out of the twin bed and get ready for class, but when she tried to get up, Logan instinctively tightened his arm. She tried twice more to get up, but he wouldn't let her. She sighed and stopped trying. 

"Logan," she said softly over her shoulder. He didn't budge. "Logan!"

"Hmm," he hummed against her neck.

"Logan, come on," she whined, "I've got to get ready for class. _You've_ got to get ready for class!"

"Noooo, sleep," Logan said, pulling her closer.

"No," Rory said slowly, "class." She lifted his arm from around her waist and sneaked off to the bathroom.

She came back to find Logan sitting up. "Mornin', Ace!" he said, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.

"Good morning," Rory said. "So, have I satisfactorily fulfilled my end of the bet?" she asked, shrugging on her coat and flipping her hair out.

"Technically, yes, but must you go so soon?" Logan pouted, patting the now-empty spot beside him.

"It's called class, Logan, and don't you have it too?" Rory said dryly.

"I've got plenty of class," Logan quipped.

"Ok, as much as I'd enjoy a round or two of witty banter this morning, I've got to go. I'll see you later," Rory said, tossing her scarf around her neck and walking to his bedroom door.

"Is that a promise?" Logan asked suggestively.

"Well, it's a statement of fact; I assume the week was meant to be consecutive, was it not?" Rory asked, pausing at the door.

"I suppose so," Logan said.

"Alright, then. So I'll see you tonight. Bye!" Rory flitted out the door.

Logan lay back down on the bed. He liked waking up to Rory… but did she like waking up to him?

* * *

Rory liked waking up to Logan, which was a potentially dangerous thing. She needed to figure out whether or not he was serious about this dating thing, or whether he was just attracted to her and playing with her. It was very troublesome to think about. On the one hand, she instinctively really wanted to trust him. On the other hand… well, his record speaks for itself. She was considering this as she walked back to her room after her first class. 

"Hey there, Ace. Long time no see," Logan said, appearing out of nowhere and falling into step beside her.

"Geez, you scared me!" Rory said as he jolted her out of her thoughts.

"Yeah, looked like you were having some Jack Handy Deep Thoughts there. What were you thinking about?" Logan asked.

"Um…nothing really," Rory lied.

"Huh. Ok," Logan said, not really believing her. "Hey, come here," he said, grabbing her arm and pulling her between two buildings.

"Whoa, what - "

Rory was cut off by Logan suddenly kissing her. She immediately kissed him back, allowing him to pull her as close as humanly possible.

Logan finally pulled away. "Hi," he whispered, a smirk already forming on his face.

"Hi," Rory said back. She couldn't handle it anymore; her hormones were taking over, and that needed to stop.

"Ok, listen, let's get one thing straight right now," she said, pushing him away. "We are _not_, I repeat, _not_ going to be fuckbuddies, understand?" she blurted out.

"Excuse me?" he said incredulously.

"I'm serious," Rory said, warning in her voice.

"Ok, in case it's escaped your notice, we haven't…you know," Logan said.

Rory rolled her eyes. "I know we haven't, but…I just…" she didn't know how to proceed once she started. She sighed and regrouped. "Look, I think we should take this slowly. For me to take you seriously, you've got to stop…" she held her hands up helplessly.

"Stop what?" Logan pressed.

"Stop…kissing me like that! That's something you obviously know how to do, and not that it isn't an important part of a relationship, but it isn't the only part of a relationship. The difference between friends with benefits and dating is the everything else," Rory explained.

"The everything else?" Logan said dubiously.

"Yes, the everything else. The talking, and the dating, and the learning stuff about each other, and all that crap," Rory said.

"So what you're saying is you don't want me to kiss you anymore?" Logan said slowly.

"No, yes, no, I don't know!" Rory said. "All I'm saying is that I think we need to see if we have a relationship, a real one, not one based on just sexual attraction."

"Ok," Logan said slowly. "I think I get that." He pondered for a moment. "So you're overwhelmingly sexually attracted to me, huh?" he said, a definite smirk on his face.

"You know what?" Rory said, in a threatening I'm-going-to-call-the-whole-thing-off voice.

"Ok, ok," Logan said. "So we promise not to get physical?"

"By Olivia Newton-John, I think he's got it!" Rory said.

"Ha ha," Logan said sarcastically. "So when does this quasi-voluntary celibacy end, might I ask?"

"Well…" Rory said. "I don't know, exactly. We'll know when we know."

"We'll know when we know," Logan repeated.

"Yup," Rory said.

* * *

"That's big, I mean really big!" Lorelai said. They were sitting in Taylor's soda shop, having a little pre-dinner ice cream. 

"Yeah, it's like he's joined some new commitment religion," Rory commented.

"Oh, I heard about that one. Madonna's going to join it and Gwyneth is going to name her next baby after it," Lorelai said loftily.

"Yes, and what is up with celebrity baby names? Apple, Coco, what's wrong with these people?" Rory asked.

"Do I look like Robin Leach to you? I got nothin'," Lorelai said. "So let me get this straight; you've been sleeping there every night this week?"

"Yeah, so far," Rory said. "You know, I almost wish I had won that bet," Rory said, licking the ice cream off her spoon. "It would have been priceless to get a Huntzberger to do some ratty clothes shopping at K-Mart," Rory said.

"Ugh, no way, at least go to Wal-Mart; K-Mart sucks," Lorelai said.

"Ok, Rain Man," Rory said dryly. "Hey, did I ever tell you? I ran into Dean at the concert. He asked if I was going to the winter carnival this weekend. I told him I was, and I think we might have agreed to hang out."

"Hang out with Dean? Even after I made up the limerick?"

"Mom! You made up a limerick?"

"Yes! Don't you remember? 'There once was a young man named Dean, who treated my daughter so mean. He dumped her, she cried. We wish he had died, or at least contracted gangrene.'"

Rory tried to suppress her giggles. "That's awful, Mom. You should be ashamed of yourself."

"You know, you would think I would be. But I'm not," Lorelai said apologetically. "Besides, I made one up for you too."

"Oh really?"

"Uh huh: There once was a young girl named Rory, who lived next to Babette and Morey. She kissed that blond hunk, without being drunk, and now they are just hunky dory."

"Good grief," Rory said, rolling her eyes. She tossed her trash and checked her watch. "Oh, crap! I told the guys I would meet them at Luke's five minutes ago. Logan knew I was coming home to do laundry, so they all invited themselves to meet me for dinner here."

"Well, now, see, that's the beauty of having a picture window between these two shops. We can see them entering…oh, just like they are now! Go, go!" Lorelai said, shooing her away.

"Well come with me, freak!" Rory said.

"Are you kidding? And bring enemy ice cream into Luke's? Go!" Lorelai said.

Rory didn't need a second warning. She bounded out the door and back into Luke's.

* * *

"I think I'm going to try again with your little Asian friend. After all, I'm in pretty good shape for the shape I'm in," said Finn, finishing his dinner. 

"Clever, Finn," Colin said dryly.

Well I didn't write it; it's a famous quote," Finn said.

"Einstein comma Albert?" Colin asked.

"No, Rooney comma Mickey," Finn replied.

Logan laughed aloud, then pretended to turn it into a cough.

"I'm going to ask her for her number," Finn announced in a stage whisper.

"She is _not_ going to give you her number," Rory hissed under her breath.

"Why bloody not?" Finn demanded aloud.

"Let him try, he'll just whine until you let him go," Logan said easily.

"I second that emotion," Colin said.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you," she said, sitting back into her seat and picking up her cheeseburger.

"A-hem." Finn cleared his throat and stood up from their table. Finn walked up to the counter and sat down, watching Lane take orders.

Logan winked at Rory in anticipation of Finn's antics; she threw a French fry at him.

"Ah, excuse me, love, I was just wondering, did it hurt?"

"Did what hurt?" Lane said impatiently.

"When you fell from heaven?" Finn said with a winning smile. Over at their table, Colin choked on his milkshake.

"Is he serious?" Lane asked Rory.

"Completely," Rory said apologetically.

"How about I get your number, love, and I promise I'll come up with a better line by then, hm?" Finn asked sweetly.

"867-5309," Lane replied, going to wait on another table.

Finn began frantically pushing numbers into his cell phone. "Hold on, I think I need that again."

Rory giggled. "Finn, you can stop. That's Jenny's number," she explained.

"I don't understand. Who the hell is Jenny?" Finn asked, confused.

"Oh my God, Finn, do you know nothing about music? You have got to know music if you want a shot in hell with Lane," Rory said.

"I can talk about music," Finn said defensively. "Here, when she comes I'll ask an intelligent music question."

Lane walked over and gave them the check.

"So," Finn said. "What was the last album you listened to?" he asked.

"Franz Ferdinand," Lane answered.

"Brilliant. Ah…who's he?" Finn responded. Lane just looked at him.

"I can't talk to you," she decided, walking away. Finn looked confused.

"Ohhhh, you just lost lots of cool points, Finn," Rory said.

"What did I do?" Finn cried.

"Franz Ferdinand is a _band_, Finn, not just one guy," Logan explained.

"Ah. Oh well, surely there's more than one way into this lady's heart… isn't there?" he asked Rory.

Rory merely shook her head.

"What, seriously?" Finn said. "Nothing but music?"

"Nothing but music," Rory confirmed.

"Oh well, I suppose I'll cut my losses. Have you got any other hot friends?" Finn asked.

"Um, I really don't think there's a soulmate among them," Rory said.

"Hiya hon," Lorelai said, walking into the diner and sitting down at their table.

"Soulmate, soulmate!" Finn cried.

"Um, no, my name is Lorelai," Lorelai said.

"Finn, this is my mother," Rory said, making introductions. "Mom, this is Finn and Colin – you remember Logan."

"Aw, well, nice to meet you, Finn, Colin," Lorelai said. Finn dropped to one knee and kissed her hand. "Oh, um, ok, well, _really_ nice to meet you, Finn," Lorelai said, pulling her hand back into her lap and shooing Finn back into his seat.

"Gilmore, you never told me your mum was hot," Finn said dreamily.

"Oh, yeah, well, gosh, look at how time flies, we've got to go!" Rory said, throwing her napkin on the table.

"Wait, wait! We've hardly had a chance to talk!" Lorelai whined.

"You really want us to stay?" Rory asked, darting a glance at Finn.

Lorelai reconsidered. "On second though, you kids go, I have to talk to Luke. Just remember, if you need anything, who you gonna call?" she asked, pointing to herself.

"Ghostbusters?" Rory offered.

"Your mother!" Lorelai pouted.

"Of course! Bye, Mom," Rory said, giving her mother a brief kiss on the forehead.

"Bye, sweets," Lorelai said.

"Goodbye, Lorelai," Finn said, reaching for Lorelai. Logan pulled him back just in time, waving goodbye to Lorelai.

"Bye," Colin said with a grin. "Come on, Finn, let's find you a nice girl, preferably one who doesn't speak English. Wanna go to Europe? We can find you a nice milkmaid…" he trailed off as they exited the diner.

Lorelai watched as the crowd left. "Lonely, I'm so lonely!" she whined aloud. Lane grinned before going back into the kitchen to place an order. Lorelai plopped down at the counter.

"Hi, Kirk," she said. Kirk was two seats down from her.

"Hello, Lorelai," Kirk said in his usual formal voice.

"What do you do when everyone has abandoned you?" Lorelai wondered.

"Well, actually, I play a little game with myself," Kirk said.

"Ooh! Dirty!" Lorelai cooed.

"Only when I'm gardening," Kirk said reasonably.

"Uh huh…" Lorelai said, deciding to let that one go.

"Yeah, see, I pretend that I'm on Wheel of Fortune and I come up with Before and Afters. It's really fun; try it," Kirk encouraged.

"Okay. Um… Batman and Robin Hood!" Lorelai said triumphantly.

"Good! That was a good one. Ok, how about Sunset Boulevard of Broken Dreams?" Kirk offered.

"Oh, that's a good one!" Lorelai said. "Ok, now me. Um… ooh! Sarah Jessica Parker Posey!"

"Excellent!" Kirk said. "Um… That Old Black Magic Carpet Ride!"

"Ooh! The Eiffel Tower of London!" Lorelai said.

"The Thin Man of La Mancha!" Kirk said.

"Ok, I have the Before and After to end all Before and Afters," Lorelai announced. "Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants!"

"Wow!" Kirk said. "Man, you are so much better than my mother."

"And I will always cherish that," Lorelai said, putting her hand on Kirk's arm.

"Ok, but we're having a re-match," Kirk said seriously.

"Same bat-time, same bat-channel," Lorelai said. She watched with a smile as Kirk left. Luke finally appeared from the kitchen.

"Hey Luke," Lorelai said, a wicked gleam in her eye, "wanna play a game?"

* * *

"You _will_ skip class today," Logan said, waving his hand over Rory's face. 

"You know, Jedi mind tricks only work on the weak of mind," Rory said, elbowing Logan in bed.

"Ouch, Ace! Well, I figured you might be more susceptible before coffee," he reasoned.

Rory grinned. She couldn't believe that she and Logan had managed to sleep in the same tiny twin bed for five nights in a row without him trying anything.

"I've got to say, I admire your resolve," Rory said, acknowledging her thoughts aloud.

"My resolve?" Logan asked.

Rory rolled over so that instead of spooning, they were now facing each other. "Yeah, I mean, it must be killing you to go without sex, or anything for that matter, for so long," she said, mischievously bumping hips.

"So you're insinuating that since I'm male, it's harder for me than it is for you?" Logan asked.

Rory raised an eyebrow.

"Ok, more difficult?" Logan amended. She giggled.

"Not just that you're male, necessarily, but more so the fact that you're you; playboy, used to getting your way…especially with women!" she teased.

"Ace…" Logan said warningly. "Rory…" he said, his tone changing. "How long is it gonna take for me to convince you that you're different?" he said quietly.

Rory didn't know what to say to that. They just lay there for a minute longer, gazing into each other's eyes.

"I've really got to go to class," Rory said reluctantly.

"So go," Logan nudged her, giving her a small smile. "I'll see you tonight."

Rory grinned and slipped out of bed. "Bye," she said, opening his bedroom door. Logan leaned up on his elbows, watching her go.

"See ya, Ace," Logan said. After she closed the door, he lay back down. Secretly, he was amazed that he hadn't tried anything with her after the day they had that discussion. He supposed it was respect that was keeping him from acting on his baser urges, but it was getting harder and harder to keep his word. After all, there's only so much a guy could take…

* * *

"Hey," Rory said, greeting Paris as she floated into her room. 

"What's up with you? You look very smug. Are you and Huntzberger still all Rock Hudson and Doris Day?"

"You could say that," Rory said, searching her room for her pajamas to throw into her overnight bag. She was trying to decide between her comfy pj's or the silk ones her Grandma bought her, if only to torment Logan.

"I can't believe he hasn't tried anything," Paris said, suddenly appearing in her doorway. "I mean, let's be honest, his reputation speaks for itself."

"I know, Paris," Rory said, slightly annoyed, "but that's the whole reason that I added this stipulation."

"You know, that's really rather clever. I should try that myself," Paris said thoughtfully.

"What do you mean?" Rory asked, looking for her fuzzy slippers.

"Well, Doyle and I haven't discussed labels. I mean, what are we, really? Every night that you've been at Logan's, Doyle has been here," Paris explained.

"Oh boy," Rory said under her breath, not sure she was ready for the upcoming mental images.

"We're sleeping together regularly, but what happens when you're staying here every night again? How will he explain himself to you? I need to get to the bottom of this," Paris said intensely.

"Well let me know how it goes. I'll be at Logan's if you need me," Rory said, zipping up her bag and bounding out the door.

Rory was practically humming on her way to Logan's. She felt rather silly, but she couldn't help it. She was a miracle worker! What was it Paris said the other day? Oh yes, she was Annette Bening. She rounded the corner and paused, seeing Logan standing in his doorway. She squinted, not believing her eyes. There was Logan with a leggy blonde, and she was _definitely_ not Stephanie! She watched in dismay as he hugged the mystery woman and gave her a kiss on the cheek. The woman walked away and Logan watched her go, a smile on his face. He glanced at his watch and popped back inside, obviously expecting Rory.

* * *

Ok, so I know I was gonna write the carnival scene, but there's only so much a girl can do in two nights! You'll have to accept this little taste of a chapter, and I'll write more, hopefully by Tuesday night! So: what's up with this mystery girl, hmm? Any ideas? (I bet some of you know.) Next chapter: Rory and Paris discuss what Rory just saw, and a fine assortment of our favorite characters will make an appearance at the winter carnival. I'm talkin' both in Stars Hollow and at Yale. And who knows, I might even have a little Luke/Lorelai action! Or a confrontation between Logan and Dean... any ideas? There's lots to work with here. So, new challenge: if I get **50** reviews, I'll have a seriously slammin' update for everyone to read after Tuesday night's episode! And I love me some creative reviews. Thank you for reading!  



	11. You Are in Quite a Pickle, Yes Sir

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **Ok, so _technically_ I didn't get the 50 reviews to post tonight, but what the hell, I'm posting anyway! And can I just say that 99 of you guessed that the blonde was Honor, but one reviewer wins for most creative guess: "Right so the leggy blonde is Logan's mother's lesbian girlfriend's decorator that he has hired to seduce Dean. And he and Logan have a confrontation when the two are discovered making out (Dean and the blond not Dean and Logan who is blond but so far from the point right now). Ahem." Great great _great_! That's what I love to hear, ladies. :) So, without further ado, the next chapter!**

* * *

**

CHAPTER 11: YOU ARE IN QUITE A PICKLE, YES SIR

* * *

Rory stormed into her dorm, ignoring Paris and going straight to her room, slamming the door behind her. 

"Rory, is that you?" Paris called from her room.

"No," Rory called, flopping down on her bed. The last thing she wanted to deal with right now was Paris. She curled up in a ball and tried not to cry. She was unsuccessful.

Paris burst in the door.

"What is it, Paris?" Rory barked.

"Wow. Lovely little Blair Witch thing you've got going on," Paris remarked callously. "Tissue?" she offered.

"Point, Paris. Get to it," Rory said, blowing her nose.

"Nevermind. I can't talk to you when you're like this." Paris stormed out of the room. Rory made a face at her door, knowing full well that Paris couldn't see her. She eased off the bed and bent over to set her overnight bag on her desk chair. When she stood up, she was eye level with her memo board. "Romance comes into your life this year in a very unusual sort of way," she read aloud. Rory laughed humorlessly. "Oh, it's unusual alright." She pulled the fortune off her board and tossed it in the trash, crawling back into bed. Rory sighed and turned off the light.

* * *

Rory listlessly picked at her food, finally setting down her fork and leaning her head in her hand, elbow resting on the table. 

"Ok, I know you're in some kind of funk, but have you heard anything I've been saying?" Paris asked.

"Yes," Rory said. "You laid down the law, Doyle is now committing, everybody's happy, the end," Rory said.

"Ok, that's it, I have _got_ to know what's wrong with you, otherwise it's going to ruin my lunch, not to mention the rest of my day, so spill," Paris ordered.

Rory sighed. "Ok. So you know how I imposed the no-kissing rule on Logan?"

"Yes, I used the same thing on Doyle and he cracked within the hour."

"Right. Well, _apparently_ Logan couldn't handle it," Rory said bitterly.

"What do you mean?" asked Paris.

"I mean that last night when I went to his room, I caught him with another woman."

"What?" Paris said. "That little weasel!"

"Precisely," Rory said. "I mean, it didn't take very long! A couple of days, and bam! He found himself a hussy."

"Wow. You don't hear the word 'hussy' bandied about much these days," Paris commented.

Rory picked up her fork, nudging the food around her plate before dropping it again. "You wanna know the worst part?" she said.

"What?" Paris asked.

"The weird thing is that she looked like someone we'd be friends with, you know? Not some two-bit floozy. She didn't look like any of those party girls we're used to seeing hang all over him," Rory said.

"It is a puzzlement," Paris said.

Logan walked up to their table, a smile on his face but confusion and hurt in his eyes. "Hey, Ace… I missed you last night. What happened?"

Rory stared resolutely at her lunch tray. Logan tried again.

"Um… I tried to call you, but your phone went straight to voicemail. Are you ok?" he asked.

"Do you hear something?" Rory asked Paris, cocking her head to one side.

"It's all Charlie Brown teacher talk to me," Paris said, not acknowledging his presence.

Rory looked at Logan. "I'm sorry, I don't speak jerk." She grabbed her tray and stood up, depositing it before walking away, leaving Logan standing there, scratching his head.

"I don't get it – what's wrong?" he said.

"Are you kidding me?" Paris asked. "How dumb are you, really?"

"Paris, can you just tell me what's going on?"

"I think you're well aware of what's going on, considering it was going on in your pants," Paris retorted.

"Excuse me?" Logan said incredulously.

"You heard me. You lull Rory into a false sense of security, gain her trust, only to be screwing around behind her back this whole time? You disgust me, and you're damn lucky if she doesn't pull a Lorena Bobbitt on your ass," Paris said.

"Look, I don't know what the hell you're talking about, but-" Logan stopped, the lightbulb going off in his head. "Oh no," he groaned, sitting down in Rory's vacant seat.

"Oh no is right, you bastard. Don't sit down – did I say you could sit down?" Paris said.

"Paris, listen, did Rory come to my room last night?" Logan asked intensely.

"So what if she did? Sad that you got caught?" Paris said, steel in her voice.

"She must have seen Honor. Shit!" Logan said.

"Is there any reason why you're still sitting here?" Paris said, annoyed.

"Paris, Honor is my _sister_," Logan said.

"Your what?" Paris said.

"My sister! She came over yesterday to tell me that Josh – her boyfriend – finally proposed. She was showing off her engagement ring. Man, I can't believe this!" he said, sitting back and running his fingers through his hair in frustration.

"So you're telling me you made out with your sister?" Paris said dubiously.

"Gross! No way! I gave her a hug, that's it…Rory must have seen her at the door. Shit, shit, shit. What am I going to do?" Logan said.

"Beats me," Paris said, taking a bite and looking very unconcerned. "You are in quite a pickle, yes sir."

Logan thought for a moment. "Ok, so it's Friday, so she's got Friday night dinner with her grandparents, right?" he said.

"Yeah, but there's some festival in Podunk tonight that she was planning on going to, so I don't know when she's having dinner, or if it's even still on," Paris said. Her eyes narrowed. "Why, are you planning some wild apology?"

"I didn't do anything wrong!" Logan pointed out.

Paris just looked at him.

He sighed. "Yes."

"Good," Paris said.

Logan just sat there.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" Paris asked. "Go! Shoo!"

"I'm going, I'm going!" Logan said. "Geez."

* * *

Rory pulled her coat tighter around her body. It was really windy out tonight. 

"Rory, hi!" Clara called, running up to hug her. Dean followed close behind, shaking his head.

"Oh – ok!" Rory said, startled. She grinned and hugged her back. "Hey Clara, how you been?"

"Great! I've had _two_ boyfriends since you and Dean broke up," she confided.

Rory kept a serious face. "Wow, two boyfriends. Well, they come and they go, huh?"

"Yeah, I had to dump Billy. He smelled funny," Clara explained.

"Well, who wants a smelly boy," Rory said sympathetically.

"Hi, Rory," Dean interjected.

"Hey," she said with an uncomfortable wave.

"Your dress is really pretty," Clara said.

"Oh, thanks. I came straight from dinner with my grandparents, but these are relatively comfortable shoes," Rory said.

"Yeah, you look great," Dean said appreciatively.

"Um…thanks," Rory said, tucking her hair behind her ears. "So… um… what should we do first?"

"I think Dean should win us some stuffed animals, what do you think?" Clara said.

Rory and Dean shared a grin. "I think that's an excellent idea," she said, linking arms with Clara.

"Step right up, knock off all the bottles and win a prize! Step right up, you might be a winner, just a dollar to play!" Kirk said, calling out to the carnival crowd. "Well, hello there, Dean, would you like to play next to this complete stranger whom I have never seen before in my life?"

Rory looked at Kirk like he was crazy until she saw who he was talking about. It seemed completely out of place, but there was Colin tossing one of his three balls. Rory tried to figure out Kirk's act until she remembered that he organized their LDB scavenger hunt a few weeks back.

"Just one dollar will put you in the game with this complete stranger," Kirk said. Dean gave him a weird look but handed him a dollar, tossing the first ball and knocking down five pins. Meanwhile, Colin had finished throwing his and started to walk away, not having won a prize.

"Um, I'll be right back," Rory said. What was Colin doing here? She followed him.

"Well well well, if it isn't Rory Gilmore. How ya doin, Rory?" Colin said.

"Hey Bill, where's Ted?" Rory asked.

"Off having an excellent adventure without me, I suspect," Colin replied easily, stopping and looking around.

"So what are you doing here?" Rory said casually.

"Well, it's Friday night, and since none of us have dates, we decided to come here and participate in this little small town ritual," Colin explained.

"None of you had dates, hm?" Rory said dubiously. She thought about Logan and that girl and felt the heat creep into her face. She started to walk away.

"Hey, what gives?" Colin asked.

"I'm mad at you. I shouldn't be talking to you," Rory said.

"Mad? Why?" Colin asked.

"I'm mad at you by extension," Rory said.

"Oh yeah, Logan told us you saw-"

"Don't even bring it up if you value your life," Rory warned.

"Now listen, if you'd just let him explain," Colin said.

"I'm not letting him explain anything! I know what I saw!" Rory said.

Just then, Dean and Clara came up, Clara holding an oversized stuffed teddy bear.

"Now excuse me, I have to go be told I'm going to be rich and famous. Come on, Clara." She stomped over to the fortune teller's booth. Clara shrugged and followed her.

* * *

"I don't know what Hermione's talking about, Professor Trelawney knows her stuff," Rory joked. 

Clara giggled. "Ooh, look at that guy, he's really cute!" she gushed.

Rory looked up. "Who?" Her eyes met Logan's. "Yeah, he is," Rory said carefully. "Tell you what, why don't you go find your brother and get us some popcorn, ok?"

"Ok," Clara said. She tugged on Rory's shirt. "But I think he's really cute, so if you don't want him…" she wagged her eyebrows suggestively.

Rory tried to hide her smirk. "Go!"

* * *

"Happy talking talking happy talk…" Lorelai sang, complete with hand puppets. 

"Don't you know when to cut her off from the fruity drinks?" Luke said, taking a cup of Miss Patty's punch out of Lorelai's hand and dropping it in the trash can. The server at the punch table just shrugged.

"No! No cutting off! I'm _thisclose_ to Bali H'ai," Lorelai whined.

"Ok, Bloody Mary, time to go home," Luke said, taking her arm and leading her away.

"Come on," Luke said crabbily.

"I'm coming to join you, Elizabeth!" Lorelai said in a gravelly voice.

"Geez," Luke said, rolling his eyes. "You're not gonna have a heart attack. Where's your car?"

"I can't drive home like this!" Lorelai protested. "I've been _drinking_!"

"Ok, well then we can walk you home," Luke said.

Lorelai returned to her normal voice. "Ok, see, I don't think walking's an option either."

"Well we can't go in the truck," Luke said.

"Why not?" Lorelai said, stumbling over to it and leaning on the hood.

"Because it's broken, or at least I think it is – it's been making some odd noises lately, and I don't wanna take the risk of driving it until I figure out what's wrong," he explained.

"Awwwwwww…." Lorelai said, petting the hood. "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, we still love you," she cooed.

"Stop petting the car," Luke said. "Come on, you're staying here tonight."

"Why, Lucas Danes! Are you takin' advantage of me?" Lorelai said, batting her eyelashes as Luke unlocked the diner.

"No," Luke barked.

"Well why not?" she pouted.

"Ok, you're gonna need _lots _of water," Luke said, pushing her through the door.

* * *

"Rory, I've been trying to call you all day," Logan said, walking up to her. 

"I turned my phone off," Rory said frostily.

"Please, let me explain," Logan pleaded.

"I don't want to hear any of your explanations. I know what I saw, and I know I don't ever want to see you again!" she said, trying to keep her eyes from welling up with tears.

"Ace, come on, do you really think I would screw this up?" Logan said, gesturing to the space between him and Rory. "You know I wouldn't."

"I don't know _what_ I know anymore," Rory said, defeated.

"You know what? I think you're scared. I think you're scared to trust me," Logan said.

"So what if I am?" she countered. "It's only logical. Now please, just go away," Rory said, pushing past Logan, walking as fast as she could.

"Dammit!" Logan said to noone. He stood there. There was only one way to make Rory understand. He pulled out his cell phone.

* * *

"You ok, Rory?" Dean asked as Rory downed another cup of Patty's punch. 

"I'm fine," she said with false enthusiasm. "What's next?"

"I bet I know what's wrong with her," Clara said slyly, eating a piece of popcorn. "I bet it was that boy. He made her mad."

"Who wants to get cotton candy, huh?" Rory said, raising her hand.

"What boy?" Dean asked, worrying that it was who he thought it was.

"Nobody," Rory said, putting her hand down. "How about a corn dog?" She raised it again.

"He was really cute," Clara said. "He was all dressed up like Rory and had blond hair, kind of spiky."

"How about a caramel apple? What's a winter festival without a caramel apple?" Rory said desperately.

"Rory," Dean said, taking her by the shoulders. "Was Logan here?" he asked seriously.

Rory shrugged. "Maybe," she said, taking another sip of punch.

"And is that why you're drowning your sorrows in some 100 proof punch? You might as well be drinking kerosene!"

"I'm not drowning my sorrows!" Rory threw away her cup as if to prove a point.

"That guy at the booth… he was one of his rich little friends, wasn't he?" Dean said, suddenly remembering Colin's face.

"Can we not talk about this?" Rory said.

"Hey, I see Amy. Can I go hang out with my friends for awhile?" Clara asked Dean.

"Yeah, sure," Dean said distractedly.

"See you later, Rory," Clara said, skipping over to join her group of friends.

"I knew he would hurt you," Dean said. "What happened?"

"Nothing happened, we're just not together, that's all. Can we drop it?" Rory said vehemently.

"Sure. You know, that's not you. You're not one of them, not really. You're as much a part of this town as I am," Dean insisted.

"Yeah, I guess so," Rory said. Her head was pounding. She sank down onto the nearest bench. Dean sat down next to her.

"You know, I've been thinking," Dean said slowly, gauging her reaction.

"What?" Rory said, putting a hand to her forehead.

"Well," Dean said, "maybe all this happened for a reason. Maybe the universe is just trying to tell us to stop running from each other. We belong together, Rory."

"Dean, I can't do this right now," Rory said tiredly.

"Do what? Rory, don't you see? We're supposed to be together."

Rory just shook her head. "No, Dean. We have a past, but we don't have a present, and I certainly don't think we have a future."

"Well," Dean said, "why don't you at least give it a try, hm?" He leaned closer to kiss her.

Rory turned her head away. "Dean, stop!"

"Come on, Rory," Dean said, kissing her jaw and trying to turn her face toward his. "You know you want to," he said, trying again to kiss her.

"Dean, no!" Rory said, trying to push him off of her. Dean, however, was stronger, and kept pushing.

"Come on, Rory," he mumbled.

"Stop!" she said, bordering on hysteria.

"The lady said stop, mate. Now I kindly suggest you remove yourself from her person," a voice said from above.

"Finn!" Rory cried in relief. Never in her life was she so happy to see him as she was in that moment.

"I don't really think this is any of your business," Dean said threateningly.

"See, that's where you're wrong, mate. Rory _is_ my business."

"Geez, Rory, how many of these guys did you date?" Dean said incredulously.

"Dean!" she said in astonishment.

"Rory's a dear friend of mine; many is the time that she has prescribed excellent hangover food, and she's my best mate's girl, so I suggest you get your bloody hands off of her."

"Oh yeah? Well I don't see him anywhere," Dean said threateningly. "And what exactly are you gonna do about it?"

"What am _I_ going to do? I think you meant to ask 'what are _we_ going to do,'" Finn said. Colin and Robert and Logan stepped up.

"You guys are seriously going to beat me up? What are we, in high school?" Dean sneered, standing up to face them.

"Stay cool, boy," Finn said.

"Um, Finn, now's not the time, unless you wanna involve a real life Officer Krupke," Rory said, slipping off the bench.

"Get behind me, Rory," Logan said.

"Oh please," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

"Guys," Logan said, never taking his eyes off Dean, "take Rory; this is between me and him."

"Are you sure?" Colin asked.

"Yeah, go," Logan said.

"Logan, don't," Rory pleaded as Finn put his arm around her shoulders.

"We're just gonna talk, right Dean?" Logan said.

"Sure. _Talk_," Dean said sarcastically.

Rory reluctantly let the guys lead her away.

"Look, man, I don't know what you did, but I'm pretty sure you've ruined your chances with Rory, that is, if you ever had any," Dean said. "So you might as well let her come crawling back to me."

"I beg to differ," Logan said. "In fact, I'd say the chances of me and Rory living happily ever after are pretty good right now; at least they would be if you'd leave her alone," he said threateningly.

"Oh, afraid of a little competition, huh? Rory and I have a history, one which you'll never be a part of, and I think you just can't handle it. I mean, you can't mean that much to her if you haven't slept together yet," Dean scoffed.

"You know, I'm getting a little tired of this," Logan said, his blood pressure rising. "I mean, I know it's just sheer delusion on your part, but I gotta wonder why you're so interested in our sex life," he asked pointedly, advancing on Dean.

Dean took a step forward. "Well I would be interested…_if you had one_," he sneered.

"I've told you once before, and I'll tell you again… what Rory and I do is our business, and nobody else's," Logan said, his face mere inches away from Dean's. "And I'd really appreciate it if you'd stop bothering her."

"Or what?" Dean said.

"Or what?" Logan repeated.

"Yeah, or what? Daddy's gonna pay me off?" Dean said derisively.

"No, you'll be dealing with me personally," Logan said in a low voice.

"You wanna punch me? Go right ahead," Dean goaded.

"Oh, believe me, I really wanna punch you. I'm imagining at least twelve different ways to inflict pain on you," Logan said.

"Only twelve?" Dean growled.

"Fourteen now, but who's counting?" Logan said. "But you know what? I'm not going to."

"Why, you chicken?" Dean taunted.

"No, I'm just going to keep you waiting. Because I can guarantee that something infinitely worse than punching you will occur if you come near her again. You got me, partner?" Logan said quietly.

"Oh, I got you, but this ain't over," Dean said.

"Well if that's the case, don't say I didn't warn you," Logan said. He turned around and walked away.

* * *

"Just let me go to the bathroom, please!" Rory said. 

"No way! You're gonna run," Colin said.

"I'm not gonna run. Tell him I'm not gonna run, Finn," Rory pleaded.

"Oh, she's gonna run," Finn confirmed.

"Ugh!" Rory said, putting her head in her hands.

"Oh, heads up, here comes Huntz," Colin said. "And he's got backup."

Rory looked up. "No way, I am outta here," she said.

"Just wait a moment, hm?" Finn said gently.

"Guys, I can take it from here," Logan said.

"Alright, we'll catch ya tomorrow. Come on, Finn," Colin said.

"Look, Logan –" Rory started.

"Rory," Logan said, "I'd like to introduce you to my sister and her fiancée."

"Your…your sister!" Rory said.

"Hi, I'm Honor. This is Josh. It's so great to meet you – Logan's told me so much about you," Honor said, shaking Rory's hand.

"Um… funny, Logan's told me nothing about you," Rory said, giving Logan a playful pointed look, relief evident in her eyes.

"Well, we'll let you get back to your carnival… this is so cute! Wanna go play some midway games, Josh?" Honor asked.

"Sure," Josh said warmly. "See you guys later!" he said with a wave. That left Rory and Logan standing there alone.

"So…" Logan said.

"So…" Rory said sheepishly.

"Are we…ok?" Logan asked tentatively.

"Yeah. I'm sorry I jumped to conclusions," Rory said, blushing from embarrassment.

"It's understandable," Logan allowed. They stood there for a moment. "So…" Logan said, tracing circles in the dirt with the toe of his shoe. "We still have two nights left, right?" he said with a smirk.

Rory broke out into a smile. "Yeah, two nights," she said. He opened his arms for a hug, and Rory gladly stepped in.

"You know," Logan said when they pulled away, "I should really add a night or two for pain and suffering."

"For mental anguish?" Rory teased.

"Yeah," Logan laughed. "So, you spending the night tonight?" he asked.

"I have to; I have a bet to fulfill," she said.

"Good. Just so you know, I'm spending the night in Paris," he said, walking away.

"Logan," Rory said. She watched in dismay as he kept walking. "Logan!" she called. "We can't just go to Europe!"

Logan turned around and started walking backwards. "Sure we can, Ace!" He turned around and kept walking.

"No we can't! We have class on Monday, we have homework to do before then…" she said, trailing after him.

"So do you homework on the plane! Personally, I'm going to sleep. I mean, it's seven hours, you know."

"I don't even have my passport!" she cried. "Do you have your passport?" she asked accusingly.

"Yes," he answered calmly. "I keep it with me at all times, you know, just in case. Why, where do you keep yours?" he asked innocently.

"In my bedside drawer," Rory said.

"Well, good thing we're about a block from your house," Logan said.

"Just in case," Rory said under her breath, shaking her head.

Logan stopped a few feet ahead of her. "You comin'?" he asked, holding out his hand.

Rory sighed. "I must be crazy," she said.

"What was that?" Logan asked, putting his hand to his ear.

"Lead the way, Jeeves," she said, placing her hand in his, resigned to her fate.

Logan whooped. "Alright, let's go. You can pack in ten minutes, right?"

"Yeah, right, and Spicoli's a Mensa candidate," Rory said rolling her eyes. She grinned as they hurried to her house.

* * *

Alright, so just like "I Love Lucy," our story is goin' to Europe! Let me just say, I have _such_ cute ideas for this weekend trip. But, should you want, in your reviews, suggest places for them to go, or things for them to do. So come on, review already!  



	12. VoulezVous Coucher Avec Moi?

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right **

* * *

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **I apologize in advance for my rusty French. My latest Netflix obsession: Freaks and Geeks. You guys remember that show? It only lasted for a year, but it freakin' rocked! My personal belief: ASP saw James Franco in this show and thought, "hey, let's create a character called Jess!" (Though to be fair, in the show, Franco's character is an ass, and Jess was at least a cultured ass.)

And the best part? In the basketball game episode, guess who plays an angry rival school member? Some dude named Matt Czuchry…."Teenage Guy #1." Meanwhile, I totally just looked him up on the IMDB, and _apparently_ that was the first thing he ever did! Happy surprise! Sigh. And now we return to our recently scheduled update; it's hot ladies, don't say I didn't warn you!

* * *

CHAPTER 12: VOULEZ-VOUS COUCHER AVEC MOI?

* * *

"You know, Rick Steves says there's nothing like a little premarital travel to test your relationship," Logan said, leaning his seat back. It was 11:00 Eastern Time, and they were somewhere over the ocean at that point.

"Oh really," Rory said, smiling down at him.

"Oh yeah, definitely," Logan said, putting his hands behind his head.

"Well," Rory said, reclining her seat to the same level as his, "I don't think we need any more tests, do you?" Rory said.

"Oh, I agree," Logan said, opening one arm for her. She leaned her head on his shoulder as he closed his arm around her. "Now we sleep."

"But I'm not sleepy," Rory said. "Tell me a story."

"A story, Ace?" Logan whined. "Ok. Once upon a time, there was a girl named Rory, and she pestered her boyfriend to tell her a story, but instead, he decided to tickle her, and she learned never to ask again. The end."

"Ok, there were many things wrong with that story," Rory said. "First of all, you're not my B-word. Second of all, you tickle me and I'm switching seats with the snorer. New story."

"Ok, well I'm too tired to think up a story. Although I could tell you a joke."

"A joke?" Rory asked.

"Yeah. So Gore Vidal, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, and Norman Mailer all walk into a bar," Logan said.

"Ok, all of a sudden I'm really sleepy," Rory interrupted.

"Really," Logan said skeptically.

"Oh yeah!" Rory said, stretching and giving a huge fake yawn. "Sleepy, so sleepy," she said, closing her eyes and snuggling into him.

"Little faker," Logan said, grinning. He closed his eyes and leaned his head on Rory's.

"Night, Ace," he said.

"Goodnight," Rory said.

* * *

"So, what do you want to do first? This weekend, the city's all yours," Logan said as they got in an airport cab.

"Coffee. First, there must be coffee, and lots of it," Rory said.

"Well, see, that's the lovely thing about Paris, Ace; there's a café on every corner!" Logan said. "You've been here before, right?"

"Yeah, twice; my mom and I went backpacking across Europe after my high school graduation, and I went with my grandma this past summer."

Logan mustered up his best cheesy French accent. "Ah, so you know her well," he said, referring to Paris.

"Yes, a whole city full of Michels. It was delightful," Rory said wryly.

"The guy at the inn, right?" Logan clarified.

"Yes, and snooty as all get out. Still, I liked practicing my high school French, and I liked it better with my mom because we seriously mixed with the locals. Grandma only wanted to go to places where she could speak English."

"Well then, we'll just have to blend in with the local crowd. How's that high school French of yours?" Logan asked.

"Très magnifique!" Rory quipped.

"Bien, bien," Logan said.

* * *

"Oh, I needed that," Rory said as they got up and walked away from the sidewalk café.

"The coffee or the three croissants you just inhaled?" Logan asked.

Rory playfully hit his arm. "Both!"

Logan laughed and casually reached for her hand. She made no comment, instead just intertwining their fingers. Logan's eyes lit up with an inner smile. Apparently the whole no-kissing thing had no restrictions on other shows of physical affection.

"How do you feel about books?" Logan asked randomly.

"Generally? I'm for them," Rory said, giving him a smile, swinging their hands as they walked down the sidewalk.

"Well that's good to hear," Logan said wryly.

"Yeah, especially those choose-your-own-adventure books. Did you ever read those when you were a kid?" Rory asked.

"Yeah, but I cheated. Whenever I died or didn't like the outcome, I'd go back to the decision page and go the other way," Logan said.

"I can't believe you cheated!" Rory said.

"Well why the hell not? You read those books for enjoyment, and that's how I enjoyed them. Come on, are you saying you _never_ cheated in those books?" Logan said.

"Maybe…but only once or twice!" Rory said defensively.

"Mm hmm," Logan said, disbelievingly.

"Anyway, what's with the book question?" Rory said, trying to change the direction of their conversation.

"Well, bookstores in this city tend to be rather expensive, but I know a place where you can get a bargain," Logan said.

"Oh really?" Rory said, intrigued.

"Yeah," Logan said as they rounded the corner. "And here we are: les bouquinistes."

Rory looked in amazement at the rows of bookstalls, leaning right next to the Seine River. "Oh my God, it's like Mecca!" she said, rushing to the first stall and immediately perusing the stacks.

* * *

Two hours later, Rory had an armload of books. She looked around and suddenly realized that Logan was no longer next to her. She immediately felt guilty; she remembered dragging Dean to these things, and he would patiently wait while she looked and looked, even though she knew he was miserable. She didn't want to make Logan feel miserable as well.

"Logan!" she called. She was pretty much done looking, and could always come back tomorrow. "Logan!" she called again, going to the next stall. She grinned in amazement at the sight. There was Logan haggling with the Frenchman running the stall. His pile of books was larger than Rory's.

"There you are," she said, not being able to help the huge smile on her face.

"I'm so sorry, Ace! I just got carried away," Logan apologized.

"No apologies necessary! I'm not exactly done looking myself," Rory said guiltily.

"Here, add yours to my pile and keep looking," Logan said, taking the books from her arms.

"No, that's ok, I can get them," Rory said, offering to pay for her own books.

"Ace," Logan said firmly, "can you argue in French?"

"Um… not exactly," Rory said.

"Well then just let me buy you some books, ok?" Logan said easily. "Now go, pick some more."

Rory reluctantly let him add hers to his pile and turned around to go get some more. She stopped and turned back around to face him.

"What?" he said.

Rory said nothing, but stood on her tiptoes and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thanks," she said in a small voice. She darted around to the next stall. Logan stared after her for a moment until the bookseller broke his reverie.

"Monsieur? Monsieur?"

Logan snapped out of it and began to negotiate with greater gusto.

* * *

"Oh, I am so stuffed," Rory moaned, clutching her stomach. They had just finished a fabulous lunch at the Restaurant D'Eric Frechon.

"Well after four courses plus most of my dessert, it's no wonder," Logan chuckled.

"Are you laughing at my pain?" Rory warned.

"Never. I know better," Logan teased with a wink. Rory listlessly lifted an arm and dropped it back down.

"What was that?" Logan said with a little choke of laughter.

"That was me hitting you, only I don't have the energy," Rory said.

"Hm; methinks the lady doth have jet lag," Logan said.

"We're in Paris. You can't be Shakespearean in Paris," Rory said.

"Is that your way of saying you wanna hit the Eurostar and country hop?" Logan said.

"No!" Rory said.

"Aw, come on Ace, why not?" Logan cajoled.

"Well for one, that would require getting up, which is something I'm sooo not prepared to do right now. It must be the wine going to my head," Rory said airily.

"Funny, I thought it would be all the chocolate," Logan teased.

"Don't make me hit you again," Rory threatened, trying to lift her hand again.

"Yeah, I think I'll survive," Logan said. "Come on, you need a nap."

"A nap? Where am I gonna take a nap? I'm not sleeping on the street. Paris may be beautiful, but it's also very dirty," Rory said.

"Hotel, Ace. You remember what those are?" Logan said, standing up and holding out a hand to help her up.

"Yes," Rory said grumpily, accepting his hand and reluctantly standing up. "Although you may have to carry me there."

"Oh yeah?" Logan said, an impish gleam in his eye.

"No! I take it back," Rory said quickly.

"Why?" Logan asked.

"Because last time you said you'd carry me, it was not the kind of carrying I wanted," Rory explained.

"Ok, no carrying unless absolutely necessary. Come on," Logan said, putting his arm around her shoulders as they walked out of the restaurant. She slipped her arm around his waist and leaned her head on his shoulder.

"Sleepy, so sleepy…" she said.

Logan rolled his eyes. "Come on, I know just the place." He hailed a taxi and gave the driver an address as they slipped into the backseat.

"Where are we going?" Rory said, yawning.

"This absolutely amazing place. You're going to love it," Logan assured her. He thought for a moment, then frowned. "Oh yeah…there's a catch, though," Logan said.

"A catch? Yeah, I'm not liking the sound of that," Rory said warily.

"Well, the thing is, I've stayed there a couple of times with the guys," Logan started.

"Uh huh? I'm already concerned," Rory said wryly.

"No, hear me out," Logan said with a smile. "See, it's the best place we've ever stayed. The owners are incredible, the rooms are comfortable, and it's close to everything…it's just the best place."

"Mm hm?" Rory said, waiting for the catch.

"Ok, so the thing is, one time we came with a couple of LDB people, which included girls," Logan said.

"Ok, well we're not going to stay any room where you… you know… with anyone," Rory said with a look.

"No! No, that is so not where this is going," Logan said. "Well, it sort of is, but not in the way you think."

"Ok, the point, Logan?" Rory said with half a smile.

"Well, the point is, they wouldn't let us stay here."

"What?" Rory asked, confused.

"They have this totally extreme moral code that forbids guys and girls to stay together in the same room unless…"

"Unless what?" Rory asked.

"Unless they're married," Logan finished.

"Oh, that's all," Rory said flippantly.

"Yeah…but I have an idea," Logan said, a mischievous gleam in his eye. "Chauffeur, vous pouvez arrêter ici." He handed the driver some money as they pulled up next to the curb. "Come on, Ace." He grabbed her hand and pulled her out of the cab and down the street.

"Where are we going?" Rory asked fruitlessly.

* * *

They stopped in front of a store. "Wait here," Logan said.

"Ok, but I don't think there's a justice of the peace behind the counter of your local tobacco store!" Rory called in after him. She folded her arms and rocked back and forth on her heels.

Logan came out with a small bag.

"Aw, honey, a pack of smokes, for me? You shouldn't have," Rory cooed.

"Very funny," Logan said. "Check it out." He pulled out a cigar and slipped off the ring, holding it up for Rory to see.

"Clever solution," Rory said appreciatively, taking the ring and slipping it on her finger. "A little roomy," she said, holding out her hand and assessing it from a distance. "And you don't think the design will give it away?" she asked innocently.

"Ok, ok, I'll think of something better," Logan said, gesturing for her to give back the ring.

Rory grinned and let it fall off her finger. She placed it in his hand. "It was a cute idea, though."

"Thanks," he said wryly. "So what do you say we go buy you some pajamas?"

"Pajamas? Why?" Rory asked.

"Well, this hotel doesn't provide any, and unless you wanna sleep in your birthday suit, which by the way I'm totally ok with…" Logan said suggestively.

Rory held up a hand. "No no, that's just fine. Let's go back to that department store down the street."

"Alright, alright," Logan consented. He offered his arm and Rory took it, walking down the street.

* * *

"Here," Logan said, holding out a credit card. They stood inside the department store at the bottom of the elevator.

"What's this for?" Rory said, looking at it.

"Well," Logan shrugged, "I just figured since I dragged you all the way to Paris, I might as well buy you some pajamas."

"You don't have to," Rory said.

"I insist. Come on, just take it," Logan said.

"Ok…" Rory said slowly. She slipped it into her purse.

"Ok, so you go upstairs to the ladies' section, and I'm going to the men's," Logan said.

"What are you gonna buy?" Rory said, one eyebrow raised.

"Hey, as much as I love roughing it, I think I'd be more comfortable if I had a fresh pair of underwear for tomorrow," Logan said. "That is, unless you object. I mean, I could always go commando…"

"No!" Rory said quickly. Logan laughed. "No, I'm going, I'll meet you back down here," she said.

* * *

Rory stepped off the escalator and regarded the lingerie section. She immediately went toward the pajama sets, flipping through the cotton, then the silk sections. She sighed, not sure which to choose. She briefly glanced at the racier section and gave a short snort of laughter. She could just imagine Logan's face if she stepped out of the bathroom in one of those! Rory looked around, as if someone were watching her, and walked over to a more Victoria's Secret kind of rack. She flipped through the nighties, a wicked grin on her face.

* * *

Logan watched Rory go up the escalator before heading to the men's section. As he walked, he passed by the perfume, then the jewelry sections. He nearly made it before stopping and walking backwards, taking a second look at the jewelry counter.

"Puis-je vous aider?" asked the woman behind the counter.

"En fait, vous pouvez," Logan said, an idea slowly forming in his head.

* * *

"So, got some clean drawers?" Rory teased, coming up behind Logan as he was making his purchase. He slid the smaller bag into his pocket without her seeing.

"Yes, I got a couple of pairs, plus a few other things I needed," Logan said, handing one of his credit cards to the man on the other side of the counter. "Did you get something comfortable?" he asked.

"Oh yeah," Rory said.

"Good, good," Logan said. "Ready to go?"

"Absolutely," Rory said. "Although I feel like Maurice Chevalier should be singing in the background," Rory said.

"How's that?" Logan asked.

"I just feel very Gigi at the moment… the movie, not the sister," Rory clarified.

"Ah. Well, I have to say I agree with my man Maurice… thank heaven for little girls. They do grow up in the most delightful way!" Logan said with a smirk. They left the department store and Logan led her to the hotel.

"So I got to thinking… you were right about that whole cigar ring thing," Logan said casually as they approached the hotel.

"Well, it was a sweet gesture, but I'm sure we can think of something," Rory said, yawning. She wound her arm around his and leaned her head on his shoulder as they walked. "Although I am way beyond ready for that nap, so maybe they'll do."

'Maybe…" Logan said, stopping in front of the hotel. "Hey; if I asked, would you wear something special tonight?" Logan said.

Rory raised one eyebrow. "Well now, that all depends," she responded playfully. "What did you have in mind?"

He pulled the small shopping bag out of his pocket and opened up a box. "How about this?"

"Oh my…" Rory said, speechless.

"Well, we want it to look real, now, don't we?" Logan said, watching Rory's face carefully. She slowly looked from the box to his face.

"Logan, they're… they're too much!" she said, gently touching the rings resting in the box.

"Well, what can I say, I have an eye for jewelry to go along with that eye for dress sizes," he said in a slightly teasing voice. "Go ahead," he said nervously. "Make sure they fit." He was suddenly feeling deeper feelings than he meant to feel. After all, this was just supposed to be a quick fix solution so they could stay at his favorite hotel. It was turning into a real Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan moment, and he wasn't sure he was comfortable with that. It was one thing to pour his energy into getting her back; that was a challenge, it was fun, and being with Rory was fun. But this… this was rapidly turning into more.

Rory was rooted to the spot. She was frozen. She didn't know what to say or do…basically, she didn't know how to handle the situation.

"Here," he said softly. He took the rings out of the box and slid them onto her finger. "Perfect fit." Well damn. This was definitely getting more serious by the minute.

Rory looked down at her left hand where a set of rings now resided. On the base was a simple platinum wedding band, and sitting above it was an elaborate diamond engagement ring, with one round-cut diamond in the center and smaller diamonds worked into the band design. Her heart began to beat a little faster, and she struggled to keep her cool.

"Perfect," Rory repeated. She blinked and tried to clear her head. "Um… don't you need one?" she asked, trying to go back to being practical Rory.

"Yeah, I've got one right here," Logan said, pulling out the other box.

"Well, in keeping with tradition," Rory said with a small smile. She opened the box and slipped the matching platinum band on Logan's finger.

Logan smiled and dropped the boxes back into the shopping bag and shoved it back into his pocket.

"So…" Logan said, his usual smugness tinged with anxiety. "Shall we?"

"Let's," Rory said, just as nervous as they stepped into the hotel lobby.

* * *

Logan summoned his usual charm and confidence and approached the desk. "Bonjour madame, comment ça va?"

"Comme ci, comme ça. C'est aujourd'hui froid," the middle-aged woman replied.

"Ah, mais c'est l'hiver!" Logan pointed out.

"Cela est vrai," she laughed. "Et vous, comment ça va?" she asked, gesturing to the pair.

"Ah, nous sommes dans l'amour!" Logan said playfully, hugging Rory. She offered a sweet smile.

"Bien, bien! Que peux-je faire pour vous?" she asked.

"Nous aimerions une pièce, s'il vous plaît," Logan requested, flashing the famous Huntzberger smile.

"Bien, j'ai seulement la suite de lune de miel disponible," she said. Rory's ears perked – she frantically translated in her head.

"Cela serait parfait. Merci," Logan said.

"Et ici la clef," she said, handing over the key and getting the paperwork ready.

"Merci beaucoup," Logan said. It suddenly clicked in Rory's head what the woman had said: the only room available was the honeymoon suite.

* * *

"So," Logan said, slipping back into his much safer casual mode, "I say we take a quick nap, then hit a museum before dinner." He didn't know how to handle these deeper feelings, so he tried to think only on the surface. He handed her the bag from the department store. "Here's your bag, you can change into your pj's in the bathroom if you want. I think I'm just gonna sleep in my clothes since it's only an hour or two," he said, kicking off his shoes.

Rory took her bag from Logan. She stood there awkwardly for a moment.

"What?" Logan asked, flopping down on the left side of the bed.

"Nothing…" Rory said, playing with the handle of her bag. "Um, so are we gonna wear these the whole trip?" Rory asked.

Logan scrutinized her. "Well, you don't have to if you don't want to," he said, not sure which way he wanted her to respond.

"I mean… it just might help keep up the pretense, you know," she said quickly. "And I assume they're really expensive, so I don't wanna lose them, and…um… are we gonna wear them?" she finished weakly.

Logan smiled. "You know what, I think we should. You know, so we don't lose them, like you said."

"Right," Rory said with a quick nod. She put her hands on her hips and surveyed the room.

"Are you gonna change?" Logan said, regarding her from the giant bed.

"Um…" Rory thought about what was in her bag. With the weird new energy in the room, she didn't know that she was quite prepared to put _that_ on. "You know what, I think I'll just take a nap in my clothes too." She slipped off her shoes and gingerly laid down on the bed.

"Oh my God," she said, sinking down into the plush comforter. "I want to make love to these sheets," she said in appreciation.

"How about _in_ them?" Logan said with a wink.

Rory stared at the ceiling and emitted a nervous laugh. "Behave," she said half-heartedly, gently smacking his arm. When she laid her arm back down on the bed, it was touching Logan's. She held her breath as he slowly intertwined their fingers and began to play with the rings that now adorned her finger. Heaven help her…she might just be falling for him, which was more dangerous than falling for any other guy in her life.

* * *

An hour later, Rory was still staring at the ceiling. For all her talk about jet lag and being tired, she was suddenly very awake and very aware of Logan's presence. She hadn't moved at all the entire time, still lying on top of the covers with her hand in Logan's.

Logan's eyes were closed, but he never fell asleep. He knew Rory didn't either, because she didn't move at all, and she usually squirmed when she fell asleep. This was just getting freaking weird. He cursed himself for suggesting the ring idea. Why couldn't they have just stayed at some other hotel? He knew the answer to that: he wanted to show Rory one of his favorite places in the whole word, to share it with her. The fake couple bit was originally just a roadblock to get past, but now it had turned into this huge thing. He didn't know that it would affect Rory so much, and he certainly didn't expect to feel the way he felt about wearing a ring himself. He expected to either take it with a grain of salt or get really freaked out and commitment-phobic. He never expected to be okay with an outward sign of commitment, even if it was just for show.

He heard Rory sigh and chose that moment to yawn loudly, pretending to wake up. He stretched and rubbed his face and sat up on his elbows and looked at Rory.

"Hi," he said softly.

"Hi," she replied, looking up at him.

"Have a good nap?" he asked.

"Um…sort of. I guess I wasn't as sleepy as I thought I was," she said, shrugging on the bed.

Logan raised his eyebrows. "Are you kidding me? Miss 'sleepy, so sleepy'?"

"Yeah…weird," Rory said, trying to laugh it off. There was a long awkward pause.

"So… ready to museum-hop?" Logan asked.

"Sure, let's go," Rory said. She stood up and smoothed her dress. Logan held the door open for her as they made their way back to the lobby. They passed the check-in counter.

"Sortez-vous sur la ville?" the woman asked from behind the counter.

"Oui, nous allons aux musées," Logan said, pausing to answer her. Rory pulled her coat tighter in anticipation of the cold.

"Bon. Amusez-vous, Monsieur Huntzberger," she said.

"Merci. Au revoir," Logan said.

"Au revoir. Au revoir, Madame Huntzberger," she said to Rory.

Rory was fiddling with her purse and looked up when Logan nudged her. "Oh! Um, au revoir!"

They left the hotel and Logan held out his arm to hail a cab. "Blowing our cover already, Ace?" he said with a smirk.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Ferme ta bouche," she said loftily. Logan just laughed.

* * *

"So, two giant meals in one day. I am just now beginning to appreciate how much a Gilmore girl can eat," Logan said, setting his napkin on the table.

"Well, we did a lot of walking today. We just did two museums, Logan. Two!" Rory said, holding up her fingers.

"I can count, Ace," Logan said wryly. There was another long pause. Ever since their nap, the entire rest of the afternoon and the evening had been filled with palpable sexual tension. They hadn't touched each other except by accident, and the few times they did touch accidentally, it was electric, causing them to jump away.

"So…" Logan said.

"So," Rory said, taking another sip of coffee.

"Ready to go back to the room?" Logan asked tentatively.

"Suite is more like it," Rory said, referring to the lush honeymoon suite.

"Yeah," Logan laughed nervously. "Well… we do have lots of books to read," he said with a smirk.

Rory grinned as she remembered the mountain of books they purchased earlier in the day. Her grin faded away as she considered the prospect of returning to the hotel with Logan. There had been a weird energy between them ever since they put on those rings. She had butterflies in her stomach, and she was pretty sure that they were not caffeine-induced.

"Um, how about we go for a drink?" she blurted out.

"A drink?" Logan said, one eyebrow raised.

Rory felt ridiculous. She knew he knew that she was not usually the one who suggested going out for a drink. Nine times out of ten the suggestion came from Finn. In reality, she wanted to delay dealing with… well, with whatever was going on between them.

"Yeah, you know, a bar or club or something. I mean, this _is_ Paris, is it not? There's always something to do," she said.

Logan thought for a moment. "Well, there is this one club you might like. And they'll probably let us in since Finn isn't with us," he mused.

"Nice," Rory said dryly.

* * *

"You like?" Logan asked, gesturing around him. The club was loud, and Rory had to lean closer to answer him.

"Yeah, it's fun," Rory said, mostly grateful for the amount of commotion. It was pleasantly distracting. "And this drink is amazing," she said, lifting her glass and taking a sip. "What is it?"

"A French Kiss," Logan said with a smirk.

Rory grinned and shook her head. "Of course," she said, mostly to herself. She finished the last of her drink. "Um, I'm gonna go to the restroom. Be right back," she said, slipping out of her seat.

"Ok," Logan said, watching her go. He felt ridiculous; what was up with this weird feeling in his stomach? Must have been the escargot.

* * *

Rory emerged from the ladies' room and began to fight her way through the crowd back to the bar. She almost made it before a man slipped his arms around her waist and began to bump and grind against her.

"Voulez-vous danser?" he asked.

"No!" Rory said in surprise, trying to pull away.

"Vous êtes belle," he persisted.

Rory was trapped, and looked around wildly, her eyes connecting with Logan's. She pulled on one ear, mimicking her 'rescue-me' gesture from the Yale Alumni Party last semester.

Over at the bar, Logan couldn't help but grin. Rory did need rescuing, but it was ironic that she used the same signal from the night that he pretended to be her boyfriend. Now he was going to pretend to be something else.

"Je suis… ugh, what's the word for married? J'ai un homme, um… crap, that's not right," Rory said, trying to communicate.

"Excusez-moi, mais j'aimerais danser avec ma femme," Logan said, a hint of steel in his voice.

"Votre femme?" the man said in surprise. Rory held up her left hand. "Désolé," he said, excusing himself and finding another conquest.

"Thank you," Rory said gratefully.

"No problem," Logan said. Someone bumped into Rory from behind, catapulting her into Logan's arms. "Hey… you ok?" he said, catching her around the waist.

"Yeah," she said, though she was not entirely sure that was the case. Her hands were on his shoulders, and she started to pull away, but they just got pushed closer by the crowd. Movement was so tight on the dance floor that they had no choice but to begin to dance to the rhythm of the crowd. They exchanged no words as they started to dance, full bodies touching. Rory felt like her nerve endings were sizzling.

Logan could hardly stand it. He needed a cold shower, and he needed it now. The proximity was too much to bear, and he didn't know how much longer he could last without acting on all these intense feelings. His hands on her hips as she swayed seductively (albeit unknowingly) kept wanting to drift to a part of her body that he was sure would guarantee a hand slap.

Rory could feel a sheen of sweat starting to form on her body. She made the mistake of looking into Logan's eyes, and was scared at the intensity she found in them. She used all her willpower to break that gaze, and turned her head slightly. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried to ignore the sensations he evoked when one of his hands moved from her hip to travel up her side and across her back, returning to her hip.

Logan moaned as Rory made one particular movement that threatened to get him a little… excited. He needed to do something, one way or another to get out of this painful situation. "Rory," he breathed into her ear.

Rory cringed as a chill ran through her body. "Yeah?"

"You know how you said 'we'll know when we know'?" he said, not being able to help starting to nibble on her ear.

"Mm-hm?" Rory said, biting her lower lip to keep from crying out.

"Well, please tell me you 'know,' because from where I'm standing, I sure as hell know," he said, pulling away enough to look at her.

Rory looked at him and replied without hesitation. "Oh, we know!"

"Thank God," Logan said, capturing her lips in a passionate kiss. He kissed her with a fervor that he never knew he possessed. Perhaps it was the fact that she made him wait for it, or maybe it was the whole fake-marriage thing, or maybe it was just something to do with being in Paris and the crazy energy of the city, but right now the only thing that filled his mind was Rory.

Rory kissed him back with equal ardor. They always had a powerful physical attraction in the past, but something was different this time. This time, it wasn't just a pleasant physical sensation, but rather a connection, and one that she most definitely did not want to break. Her hands went to his hair as they kissed, the background noise fading away. Logan's hands roamed her body, alternately cupping her face and smoothing down her back, pulling her as close as humanly possible.

"Rory," Logan said, kissing down her neck.

"Oh God," she said automatically, responding to his ministrations.

"Are you ready to go?" he asked between kisses.

"Um," she said hazily, struggling to focus as he moved back to capture her lips.

"Because," he said, kissing her cheek, "we could always hang out here for awhile." He nibbled on her ear. "That is," he said, kissing down her neck, "if you have the energy." He returned to her lips, murmuring against them. "Because it seems to me," kiss, "that you look a little," kiss, "tired," kiss.

"Oh yeah," Rory said. "I'm sleepy, so sleepy," she said mischievously, giving him big pouty eyes. "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?" she asked innocently.

"You have no idea how badly," Logan said, brushing the hair off her face and giving her another deep kiss before pulling away.

Logan's face took on a familiar smirk. "Let's go!" he said, giving her one final kiss before twirling her around and guiding her through the crowd and into the night air.

* * *

Ah, l'amour. Ok, so they still have tomorrow in Paris; our little European jaunt isn't over. And my goodness, what developments! And for those of you who think that there's nowhere to go from here, oh ho ho, just you wait! Now review, my dears, so I can feel the love and feed you the next chapter. Because it is going to be delicious! 


	13. Loveish Feelings

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

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**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Thanks for the reviews! I always mean to thank you profusely, though sometimes I forget. Specifically, thanks for the helpful translation hints; I went back and corrected them. (Although I left the "Madame Huntzberger," because isn't that supposed to be Mrs.? Would Mademoiselle be like his sister, or is it used in general for any young person, regardless of marriage status?) As for those who didn't understand the French, I was hoping you could work some of it out from the context, but if not, there's about a bazillion French-English translators on the Internet. Still, I'll add a translation to the Gilmore-isms on my profile.

Also, I got a request not to have the chapter open with a morning-after scene, but in order to continue from them leaving the club, I'd have to up the rating to M and educate many underage readers about the joys of sex, which is something I probably shouldn't do.  Meanwhile, I'm assuming T covers anything that you would see on network TV, so here goes!

**Previously on "The Fortune Cookie's Always Right": **Rory and Logan tried casually dating (in other words, no hanky-panky) in order for Logan to prove to Rory that he was indeed serious about her. There was a mix-up when Logan was seen with another girl (who turned out to be his sister) and he had another confrontation with Dean at the Stars Hollow Winter Carnival. After the misunderstanding was resolved, Logan and Rory flew to Paris for an impromptu weekend, where the perfect day (which included a pretend marriage in order to secure Logan's favorite hotel) ended in a steamy kiss. We return to our favorite couple on Sunday morning…

* * *

CHAPTER 13: LOVE-ISH FEELINGS

* * *

Rory moaned as Logan woke her up with a trail of kisses from her neck to her bare shoulder. "Uh uh. I need sleep. Or coffee. There are only two options, and I suspect what you're offering is neither."

"Come on, we'll sleep when we're dead," Logan said between kisses.

"Logan, it's two o'clock in the afternoon! We've been in bed for like twelve hours," Rory protested.

"Well…" Logan said, drawing the word out.

Rory turned to face him, propping her head up by her elbow. "What?"

"I mean, technically, we've gotten up several times to go to the bathroom and brush our teeth and what not," Logan said reasonably.

"You know what I mean," Rory said.

"We just can't seem to make it out of the room," Logan said slyly, punctuating his sentence with a soft kiss.

Rory blushed deeply, and tried to use humor to weasel out of the innuendo. She lay back down on her back, pulling the covers up to her chin modestly. "Well, all I know is I'm going to be walking funny for a week. Everyone will wonder why I suddenly decided to pull a Cleese."

"Pull a Cleese?" Logan repeated with one eyebrow raised.

"John Cleese. Ministry of Silly Walks," Rory explained.

"Monty Python, I know, it's just a weird reference to be making in bed," Logan said.

Rory shrugged and closed her eyes.

"You know, I'm going to have to change my nickname," Logan mused, lazily tracing patterns on her stomach.

"What nickname?" Rory asked, confused.

"Master and Commander," Logan said, the beginnings of a smirk forming on his face.

"Nobody calls you that," Rory snorted. "Besides, why are you changing it?"

"Well, you gave me a new one last night – or should I say, this morning," Logan said.

"I did?" Rory asked warily.

"Yeah. You may now call me 'My God,'" Logan said triumphantly.

Rory drew up her best withering stare. "Oh, for the love of -"

"Me?" Logan interrupted cheekily.

"You're such a pig," Rory said, whacking him with a pillow. Logan grabbed the pillow and threw it off the bed, instead choosing to attack Rory.

"Hey, you're the one who said it. Several times, in fact," he teased between kisses. Rory rolled her eyes before kissing him back. The kiss grew more heated as Logan shifted his body over Rory's.

"You're insatiable," she mock-complained, secretly pleased that he couldn't seem to get enough of her.

"Just for you, Ace," Logan said with a wink, returning to her neck.

"Yeah, sure, I bet that's what you tell all your wives," Rory teased.

"Only my favorite ones," he countered, capturing her lips in a slow, passionate kiss.

"Well," Rory said, shifting her body underneath him suggestively, "as long as I'm in the top three," she said, bringing a hand up to play with his hair as they kissed.

Logan groaned in response, and then pulled away enough to look at her. "You're number one, Ace… the only one," he said, a moment of truthful vulnerability shining through his eyes.

Rory didn't know what to say, and was on the verge of a similar confession when his next move caused her to cease thinking entirely.

* * *

"Ok, that's it, I am officially pooped," Rory said, breathing heavily as Logan lay beside her, trying to catch his breath. 

"I'm gonna have to agree with you on that one," Logan said.

Rory's stomach suddenly growled, causing them both to laugh.

"Lunch?" Logan suggested.

Rory turned her head to look at the clock. "Closer to supper," she said, noting that two more hours had passed.

Logan followed her gaze. "Wow, time flies when you're -"

Rory held up her hand. "_Please_ don't finish that sentence," she warned.

Logan just grinned. "So, you wanna shower before we go?" he asked.

"Yeah, but you can go first," Rory offered.

"Who said anything about first?" Logan said, climbing off the bed and pulling Rory with him.

* * *

After a very satisfying meal, Logan and Rory walked down the boulevard as dusk was just falling over the city. Logan had his arm casually draped across Rory's shoulders; her arm was wrapped around his waist. Rory felt very… what was the word? Carefree, 'insouciant' – it sounded even better in French. She felt relaxed, and surprisingly content. She sneaked a peek at Logan and grinned at his slightly disheveled appearance. He didn't look so Brooks Brothers with his sleeves cuffed at three-quarter length and his top button unbuttoned, not to mention his hair, which was still damp from the shower and slightly messier than usual. She could only hope that she didn't look a complete mess in comparison.

"What?" Logan asked, noticing Rory's surreptitious looks.

"Nothing," Rory said quickly.

Logan smirked. "Alright," he said, accepting her evasive answer.

"What are you so smiley about?" Rory asked Logan.

"Same thing you're so smiley about," Logan said.

"What are you talking about?" Rory said. "I'm not smiley. Am I smiley?"

"Oh, you're smiley," Logan said. "You have that I-just-got-some glow," he said in a confidential tone.

Rory feigned shock. "I beg your pardon!"

"Oh yeah. It's written all over your face," Logan explained matter-of-factly.

"Please," Rory scoffed.

"Hey, it's ok. I mean, you're not Cleese-y if that helps," Logan teased.

"Huh?" Rory asked, confused. "Oh," she said, remembering before he had to remind her. "Yeah, well, I'm just practicing my honeymooner look for when we return to the hotel," she said casually.

"Anxious to get back, are we?" Logan asked mischievously.

"No," Rory said defensively.

"I mean, gosh; who would have thought that Rory Gilmore, studier extraordinaire, would choose to spend an entire day in bed with her boyfriend rather than experience the culturally rich city of Paris?" Logan stated, mock incredulity in his voice.

"You know, that's the second time you've used that term," Rory said in a lame attempt at segue.

"What term?" Logan asked, allowing himself to be distracted for the moment.

"Boyfriend," Rory said.

"Ah," Logan said. "Well, would you say that was an inappropriate label?" he asked in a carefully detached tone.

Rory wasn't sure how to answer. "Not necessarily," she conceded.

"Uh huh," Logan said, not entirely sure. "What _would_ you say?"

"Well…" Rory said, pondering aloud.

"Because if this is how you behave with your gentleman friends, I need to have some strong words with Colin and Finn," Logan said, a half-smile on his face.

Rory grinned. "Oh yeah?"

Logan just looked at her. "Ace, come on, put me out of my misery. Was this a one-off or are we something real?"

"Well, what do you think?" Rory said, bouncing the proverbial ball into his court.

"What do I think?" Logan asked, pointing to himself with his free hand. Rory merely nodded. "I think…that you're not the kind of person to casually sleep with someone," he said seriously. She nodded again. "I also think that this whole journey we've taken this semester has forced me to develop feelings that I'm not used to." He paused to let Rory absorb his words. "And I also think," he said, stopping in the middle of the street, "that you've developed similar feelings. Am I right?"

Rory took a deep breath and faced him. "Well, if by similar feelings you mean love-ish feelings, then I'd have to agree," she said, trying to keep the nerves out of her voice. She prayed that she hadn't just totally freaked him out.

After three of the longest seconds of Rory's life, Logan's face broke out into a genuine smile. "Ace, I'd say that is the perfect way to describe them," he said, taking her face gently into his hands and giving her a soft, sweet kiss. He pulled away and returned his arm to her shoulders as they resumed their walk.

"You know I'm not saying those three little words, right?" Rory said.

"I know," Logan said.

"Because that's perhaps an even bigger deal than what we've just done, and we've only just begun -"

"Hey, Karen, I know," Logan said with a smirk, catching her unintentional reference. "I didn't say those either."

"Ok. Cuz I don't want to freak you out or anything," Rory said.

"Ace, relax!" Logan said, pressing a kiss to her temple as they walked. "Just enjoy, hm?"

"I can do that," Rory said happily. She noticed how dark it had gotten. "So, um, where exactly are we going?"

"Don't worry; we're almost there. We just have time to do one more thing, and when you only have time to do one thing in Paris, this is the thing to do," Logan said confidently.

* * *

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Logan said.

"Gorgeous," Rory breathed. She could not get over the fact that she was in Paris with Logan. She also could not figure out why she and her mother had not done this the last time. Perhaps because of the cheesy romance factor. She surveyed her surroundings and marveled at the architecture on either side of them.

They were sitting on a ferryboat that was slowly making its way down the Seine. It was surprisingly rather empty where they were sitting, enough that they could put their feet up on the seats in front of them. Rory rested her head in the crook of Logan's neck, his arm around her and idly tracing patterns on her shoulder and upper arm.

"Look, it's coming up," Logan said.

"What?" Rory asked. "Or rather, where?"

Logan waited a moment, then pointed. "There!"

Rory gasped and lifted her head. "Wow!" She squeezed Logan's hand as she watched the Eiffel Tower light up, sparkling all over. Logan unconsciously played with the rings on her finger as they sat in silence, watching the Tower sparkle from a distance.

"This right here is what I'd call a perfect moment," Logan said, briefly looking down at Rory.

Rory looked over at him and smiled. "Yeah, perfect," she said in a small voice, settling back down against him. "Ohh, I wish we didn't have to go back so soon."

"So let's stay," Logan said.

"Logan, we can't stay," Rory protested.

"Why not? We're adults, we can do whatever we want," Logan said reasonably.

"Because! We have class. We have class and a life to get back to," Rory said.

"I guess. I just wish I didn't have to go back to that life, the one that my parents assigned to me the moment I was born," Logan said. "I wish we could just stay here."

"Well, I tell you what," Rory bargained. "We can stay one more night and go back to school tomorrow; I only have one class tomorrow morning, and I'm sure I can get notes from someone. If you agree to go back tomorrow, I promise we'll come back sometime in the near future. Deal?"

"Deal," Logan said. "That is, if you can stand me for an entire semester," he joked.

"I'll manage somehow," Rory said dramatically. "But it won't be easy, let me tell you," she said, feigning exasperation. "It will take some arm-twisting to get me to date one of the most eligible bachelors on the Eastern Seaboard!"

"_Just_ the Eastern Seaboard, Ace?" Logan said, pretending to be wounded at the thought.

"My my, don't we have a big head," Rory said wryly as they pulled up to the dock. Logan followed her as she stepped out of the boat.

"You know, I was thinking; I believe I have a much better alternative to arm-twisting," he said, taking her hand and walking down the street to hail a taxi.

"Oh yeah? And what's that?" Rory teased.

"Wait and see, Ace. Wait and see."

* * *

"Goodbye, Paris," Rory said mournfully, looking out the window of the plane as they climbed higher into the sky. She sat back against her seat and picked up a magazine, flipping through it.

"Hey Ace," Logan said, nudging her elbow, "you ever heard of the mile high club?"

"Not gonna happen," she said, not even looking up from the magazine.

"Why not?" Logan asked, a mischievous grin on his face.

"Because I said so. Now go to sleep or something," she said.

"Ace…come on," Logan wheedled, nibbling on her ear.

"No. I'm taking a very important quiz; I'm about to find out if I'm a Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda."

"Fine. I know better than to interrupt you when you're in a test-taking mode," Logan teased, shifting back into his seat. He picked up a magazine, idly leafing through it before sighing and setting it back down. He closed his eyes and leaned back until he heard Rory put away her magazine.

"What's the verdict?" he asked, his eyes still closed.

"Well, apparently I am a Miranda," Rory said.

"I see. And what does that mean?"

"I have no idea," Rory said. "Maybe I'm a workaholic."

"Well, good thing you've got me to distract you from your work," Logan said, stretching one arm across her shoulders.

"Yeah, lucky me," she said dryly.

"Regretting this already, Ace?" Logan said, pretending to be hurt.

"Not a chance," she said, a gleam in her eye.

* * *

"Ah, dorm sweet dorm," Rory said, kicking off her shoes and dropping her purse in the middle of the floor before flopping down on her bed.

"Where do you want these?" Logan asked, holding up the two bags of books they bought in Paris.

"Anywhere is fine. Oh wait – don't you need to sort through them to get yours?" she asked.

"Nah, I'll do it later. Or maybe they can just live here for now," Logan said, dropping the bags next to the door and easing it shut with his foot. He took off his shoes and crawled toward Rory on her bed.

"Oh no you don't," Rory warned.

"What?" Logan asked innocently, stretching out beside her.

"Logan," Rory whined.

"Ace," Logan whined back. "Come on, don't you think it's possible that I just wanna lay here with you?"

"Possible, yes. Likely, no."

"So cynical so young!" Logan said, clucking his tongue. He started nibbling on her ear, causing Rory to flush with anticipation. He slowly started to pull up her shirt. "And so smart…" he continued.

* * *

"Thirsty, so thirsty," Rory moaned into her pillow.

"You want some water?" Logan asked, wiping the sweat from his face.

"Yes, please!" Rory exclaimed.

"Ok," Logan said, kissing her forehead and getting up off the bed. Rory watched him as he walked to the door.

Logan could feel her eyes on him and turned around. "You checkin' me out, Ace?" he said with a smirk.

"No!" Rory said, blushing. Logan gave her a chiding look. "Maybe…" she admitted. "You're more…um…built than I thought you would be," she said with a small smile.

"Hey, I don't go to the gym every day to watch old guys shower!" Logan quipped.

Rory shook her head and continued to look at him.

"What?" Logan asked.

"Oh, nothing," Rory said. "Just… aren't you forgetting something?" she asked with a flutter of her eyelashes.

"No, I'm pretty sure I covered everything," Logan said confidently.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Yeah, well, I think there's something you're forgetting to cover," Rory said, with a significant glance.

"Oh, right," Logan said, looking down. He looked around the room and grabbed his boxers, sliding them on before opening the door. "Be back in a sec," he said with a wink.

Logan chuckled to himself as he shut the door behind him and suddenly found himself face to face with Doyle in Paris's bathrobe.

"Doyle!" Logan said in surprise.

"Logan! I mean, uh, Mr. Huntz…uh…Logan!" Doyle stammered.

Logan rested his hand on his hips and acted as if he had every reason to be standing in the common room in his underwear.

"How's my favorite editor?" Logan asked easily.

Doyle could swear Logan was enjoying his discomfort. "Oh, you know, I'm fine. Um, I'm just going over some articles with Paris, because, we, um, need to go over them," he finished weakly.

"I see," Logan said, smirking. "Well, Doyle, it's been real. I'll let you get back to those 'articles,'" he said with air quotes, walking over to the fridge and grabbing two bottles of water before going into Rory's room and closing the door.

"What's going on out here?" Paris said, stomping out in Doyle's shirt.

"So, that was Logan Huntzberger," Doyle said, still dazed from their encounter.

"So?" Paris said. "I suppose they made up. I told you Rory was dating him, right?"

"Yeah," Doyle said, turning to face her. "But you didn't say they eloped!"

"What?" Paris said. "They did not. Rory's too sensible for that. I mean, Logan may be impulsive, but she would never do a thing like that, especially without telling anyone."

"Well," Doyle said, enjoying his momentary upper hand, "he came out in his underwear," he started.

"Oh, grow up," Paris said.

"No, let me finish!" Doyle insisted. "All he was wearing was his boxers… and a wedding ring," he said significantly.

"I don't believe it!" Paris exclaimed.

"Fine, go see for yourself," Doyle said, gesturing to Rory's door.

"I will!" Paris said, accepting the challenge. She strode over to Rory's bedroom door and banged on it. "Rory!" she shouted.

Rory opened the door slightly and popped her head out. "What, Paris?"

Paris thought fast. "Did you use my nail polish?" she accused.

"What?" Rory said.

"Did you use my nail polish? Because it looks less full than it did the last time I checked."

"No, I didn't," Rory replied.

"Let me see your fingernails," Paris demanded.

"Are you kidding me?" Rory said.

Paris just looked at her, tapping her foot.

"Fine," Rory said. "See?" She waved her fingers and stuck out a foot for toe inspection. "Happy now?"

Paris sighed. "Yes, but I'm watching you, Gilmore."

"Ok, Geller." Rory rolled her eyes and shut the door.

Paris slowly turned to face Doyle. "Well well well. I wonder if Emily and Richard know about this…"

* * *

"Doyle? Seriously, Ace. Doyle?" Logan asked, handing Rory a bottle of water.

"Hey, to each his own – or in this case, to each her own," Rory said, sitting up in bed and gratefully accepting the water.

"But who would want to own Doyle?" Logan asked incredulously.

"Who would want to own Paris?" Rory countered.

"Touché," Logan admitted. "I suppose there's no accounting for taste," he mused.

"How true; I mean, I ended up with _you_," Rory pointed out, barely able to contain her grin.

"Ouch!" Logan said good-naturedly. "That hurts, Ace, that really hurts."

"I think you'll get over it," Rory said dryly, setting her water bottle on her nightstand.

"I don't know; I may be in therapy for years," Logan sighed.

"You probably will, but it won't be my fault," Rory said.

Logan chuckled. "That part I agree with."

"So… Doyle saw you in your undies, huh?" Rory asked rhetorically.

"Yes, and I didn't really feel the need to fill him in on my presence. It was much more fun to watch him squirm," Logan said.

"So mean!" Rory giggled.

"I know, but whatcha gonna do? He's so easy to mess with."

Rory nodded in acknowledgement. "Well," she said, stretching and sitting up straighter, "as much as I have enjoyed our quality time, Logan, I seriously have some homework to catch up on."

"Are you kicking me out?" Logan asked in astonishment.

"In a word: yes."

Logan sighed. "Fine. I suppose I should call the guys and tell them not to worry, I didn't really drop off the face of the earth."

"Good idea," Rory said.

Logan started to scoot off the bed in search of his clothes.

Rory watched him get dressed, and waited until he turned around before she slipped her clothes back on.

"Ok, well, I'll let you study. Call me when you're ready for dinner?" Logan said, pulling on his sweater.

"Yeah, sure," Rory said.

"Ok," Logan said, grinning widely as he opened her bedroom door.

"Hey," Rory said softly, jumping up and putting her hand on his arm.

"Yeah?" Logan said, turning around.

"Thanks for this weekend," Rory said, slipping her arms around Logan's neck and tentatively kissing him. Logan kissed her back, but it was a sweet, undemanding kiss.

When they pulled away, Logan brushed a lock of hair from Rory's face. "Anytime, Ace. Anytime."

"Oh – I almost forgot," Rory said, stepping away and pulling the rings off of her finger. She tried to ignore the twinge of regret as she spoke. "Here you go," she said, holding out her hand with the rings sitting in her palm.

Logan looked down at the rings, making a split-second decision that he hoped he wouldn't regret. "Why don't you hold onto them," Logan said, folding her hand closed. "You know, as a keepsake of the weekend." Rory smiled, and he got an idea. "In fact, wear them to dinner tonight; I think we should wear them long enough to see the look on Colin's face, don't you agree?" he said mischievously.

Rory smiled back. "Forget Colin; I can't wait to see Steph's face! You should have heard her speech about how there was a line to get to you. Someone better be there to catch her if she thinks you've been gotten for life!"

"Maybe I have," Logan said with a wink. "Later, Ace."

* * *

Rory closed the door behind Logan and went over to her desk. She smiled as she put the rings back on her finger, holding out her hand to admire them. She had to admit, the boy had taste! If she could have picked any ring in the world, that would have been the one. She was also too distracted to start on her homework; she had to spill about this weekend. There was only one person to call.

* * *

"Ok, I fixed the banister. It wobbles no more," Luke said, setting his toolbox next to the check-in desk at the Dragonfly Inn. "Anything else?"

"Thanks," Lorelai said distractedly as she flipped through a magazine. "Oh wow, look at this picture! That inn has a pool. They look so happy playing in the pool." Lorelai looked up. "Hey Luke, build me a pool."

"A pool?" Luke said, crossing his arms.

"Yeah, you know, that way if I ever have the urge to be Esther Williams, bada-bing-bada-boom! Don't you want to turn me into a Million Dollar Mermaid?"

"No thanks, I like your legs."

"Why Luke Danes, was that flirting I heard come out of your mouth?" Lorelai said coquettishly.

"Could have been, we'll never know, will we?" Luke said, trying to back away.

"Does that mean I get a pool?" Lorelai asked.

"I already gave you a skating rink. That ought to fill my quota of crazy home improvement requests. I'm already pulling full time Vila duty."

"I know," Lorelai said, "and as sexy as your Bob Vila routine is, and as thankful as I am that you are more Vila than Taylor - "

"Elizabeth?"

"Tim."

"Ah! Ok. Continue," Luke said.

Lorelai paused. "I can't even remember my point," she pouted.

"Well thank God for that. Listen, I gotta go," Luke said, picking up his toolbox and giving her a quick kiss.

"Bye!" Lorelai said, just as the phone rang.

"Dragonfly Inn, Lorelai speaking."

"_Mom!_"

"Hey, sweets!" Lorelai said. "What's shakin', bacon?"

"_Well, I've had **quite** an interesting weekend," _Rory started.

"Oh yeah? Do tell!" Lorelai said.

"_Ok. So, you know that on Friday I went to the Winter Carnival sort-of with Clara and Dean?"_

"Wait, I thought you were going with Lane!"

"_Yeah, well, I kind of went by myself and happened to meet up with them, even though I knew I would bump into them… um… that's not really the point,"_ Rory said.

"Ok," Lorelai said slowly. "Continue."

"_Alright, so, anyway, I was really pissed off at Logan that night -"_

"Wait, why?" Lorelai asked.

"_Are you gonna keep interrupting me?"_

"Yes. It's my right as your mother," Lorelai said.

"_Well it's my right as your daughter to withhold personal information,"_ Rory threatened.

"Ok, ok, I will wait for the appropriate pause," Lorelai said.

"_Thank you. Now, as I was saying, I was pissed at Logan because I thought I saw him with another girl, and I pretty much hated his guts for being a big honkin' liar, but then I learned that it was his sister so I said I would continue to sleep with him as agreed."_

"Ok, I know I promised no interruptions, but the whole "sleeping with him" thing seems to be an important thing that you're skimming over here," Lorelai said.

"_Oh, right," _Rory said sheepishly. _"Yeah, that was actually pretty innocent. We made a bet about a week ago about whether or not I would like a band that he was taking me to see, and I lost it."_

"Who was the band?"

"_Hep Alien."_

"Ah."

"_Yeah, so obviously I lost that bet, and his conditions were that I had to sleep with him for a week, but all we did was sleep. I think it was his way of showing off his whole sensitive I'm-not-out-to-jump-your-bones side."_

"Very noble," Lorelai allowed. "Ok, so we're up to the Carnival where you forgave Logan."

"_Right. So anyway, I still had two nights to go, 'cause I had skipped a night when I was angry at him, and he said that he was spending the night in Paris and I had to come with him."_

"Ok, um, he did mean Paris the city, not Paris the roommate, right?" Lorelai asked for clarification.

"_Eww! Mom! The city!"_

"Wow! Wait – so did you really go to France? Without telling your mother!" Lorelai asked.

"_Yeah – but you have no idea how amazing it was, Mom!"_

"I bet I have some idea; after all, I have been before…with you!"

"_Yeah, but this time was different."_

"I'll bet," Lorelai said dryly. She tried to get her mind out of the gutter. "So, did you see Gene Kelly?"

"_He died like twenty years ago, Mom."_

"I know, but he's the only American in Paris I know. Ooh, except Sabrina!"

_"Which one? Audrey Hepburn or Julia Ormond?"_

"Hepburn of course."

"_Naturally."_

Lorelai walked into the inn's kitchen and poured herself a cup of coffee. "So, by 'amazing,' was this weekend like a turning point? Did it clarify all that ambiguity you were so angsty about?"

"_Actually, yes. We…um… declared love-ish feelings for each other," _Rory said.

"Love-ish, huh?"

"_Yeah, love-ish. You know – basically, I feel I can trust him now. So that whole boyfriend-girlfriend label thing is happening, although neither of us are ready to say 'I love you' yet."_

"Very mature of you. So – question: when do _I_ get to hang out with him?" Lorelai asked.

"_What? He's **my** boyfriend!"_

"Well, yeah, but you get to hang out with Luke," Lorelai pointed out.

"_That's different. He's Luke. He was Luke of Luke's Diner long before you guys had a thang."_

"Well, ok, but I _did_ get to hang out with Dean and Jess, so why not Logan?"

"_That's because I was in high school and had no car. And they lived here. And I was in high school," _Rory stressed.

"Well so what? Come on, let Mommy play too," Lorelai pouted. She could practically hear Rory's eyes rolling over the phone.

"_Ok, well, maybe he can come over this weekend; I'll come home and we'll rent movies or something."_

"Oh goody!" Lorelai said gleefully. "It'll be fun to merge your Yale world with your Stars Hollow world."

"_You know,"_ Rory said slowly, _"there's a good idea."_

"Where? Over my shoulder? Under my shoe?" Lorelai said.

Rory rolled her eyes. _"No, I mean about the merging of the worlds. We could have a big ol' party to let my Stars Hollow friends meet my Yale friends. I mean, I've never really tried that before, and since Logan and I are really dating now, he should probably meet everyone who's important to me."_

"Good idea, honey," Lorelai said. "So, do we have an occasion? This party needs an excuse other than 'hey, let's hang out.'"

"_Hmm. Any birthdays coming up?"_ Rory asked.

"I don't think so…hey, Sookie, any birthdays coming up?" Lorelai asked as Sookie walked into the kitchen.

"There's some next month," Sookie offered.

"Nah, too far away," Lorelai said.

"Although, today's my unbirthday!" Sookie giggled.

Lorelai just looked at her. "Did Davey just discover Alice in Wonderland?" she asked.

"Uh huh!" Sookie said enthusiastically.

Lorelai smiled. "Well, hon, sorry, no birthdays on the horizon, unless you count Sookie's unbirthday, which comes 364 days of the year."

"_Hey… that's an idea! Let's have an 'unbirthday party!' We can do like a big tea party and buy one of those Mad Hatter giant hats for Finn to wear, because, let's face it, he's the mad hatter, and some bunny ears for Kirk, because he'll want to be the March Hare, and we can do a whole Alice in Wonderland theme! It'll be trippy!"_

"Fabulous! Hey, Sookie, how do you feel about a crazy tea party?" Lorelai asked. She got no reply, because Sookie was dancing around the kitchen in circles singing to herself: "A very merry unbirthday to you, to you, a very merry unbirthday to you, to you, it's great to drink to someone and I guess that you will do, a very merry unbirthday to you!"

"Ok, well, we'll work out the details over here, including the ones that don't allow Sookie near any mushrooms. Just let me know how many Yalies to expect, ok?"

"_Ok,"_ Rory laughed. _"Bye, Mom."_

"Bye, hon."

On the other end, Rory clicked off her cell phone. She had a pretty good feeling about this weekend.

* * *

How 'bout them apples? Hm? Ok, so: (imagine cheesy announcer's voice) **next time, on "The Fortune Cookie's Always Right":** Are those two crazy kids gonna live happily ever after? Not yet, but we sure hope so! What happens when Rory's two worlds collide, and what if certain parties misinterpret their fake marriage? Leave reviews for your humble authoress, and she _might just_ update before the weekend is over! Try to break the record, hm? 


	14. Lord and Lady of the Rings

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Sorry for the wait, guys. I know, there's no excuse. Feel free to beat me with a stick. All I can say is that I peaced out for Spring Break (which I desperately needed) and though I didn't not-meet cute guys or kiss a girl (come on, doesn't anyone remember season 4?), it was a good break. And then, of course, there was the mountain of work waiting for me when I got back. So anyway, here's your chapter. Like I said, I never abandon my stories! Check the profile for Gilmore-isms and let me know what you thought. Skip the next bit if you remember this fic, but if not, here's the briefest of summaries (skipping all the Luke/Lorelai banter, of course):

**Previously on "The Fortune Cookie's Always Right":**

Chapter 1: _During the Male Yale party that Emily and Richard threw for Rory (exactly like the show until about twenty minutes into the episode), Rory is cornered by an overly amorous jerk; Logan shows up, plays the boyfriend, and rescues her. He then ups the rescue to a steamy kiss in front of everyone, which is when Dean shows up, punches him, then lets Rory placate him._

Chapter 2: _Marty brings some leftovers to share with Rory, and they hang out and eat a fortune cookie. Rory's reads: "Romance comes into your life this year in a very unusual sort of way." Dean shows up, thinks Rory's got somethin' goin' on with Marty, and she calms him down. She wakes up the next morning to find a note from the LDB._

Chapter 3: _Rory shows up to the LDB location blindfolded. Colin, Logan, and Finn take her to a mystery location that turns out to be Stars Hollow. They discuss their next big LDB event and how she will be involved over coffee at Luke's. Kirk makes an appearance, of course. Finn hits on Lane and Logan and Dean have a mini-confrontation outside Luke's._

Chapter 4: _Lorelai_ _and Rory discuss how to fix her and Dean's relationship, which is not like it was in the good ole' days. Rory and Dean exchange lackluster Christmas presents, and Logan surprises Rory with an extravagant gift. Rory decides to bring Dean to a New Year's Eve charity ball thrown by the DAR. At the ball, Shira tells Logan she's glad he isn't dating Rory because she wouldn't make a proper society wife. Logan bristles at her insinuations and goes off to say hello to Emily and Richard… and Rory. At midnight, Rory got separated from Dean and shares New Year's kisses with all the guys, but most especially with Logan. Dean sees, they go outside, they break up. Logan notices Rory outside alone and freezing, goes to make sure she's ok, and ends up kissing her._

Chapter 5: _The great LDB event! Everyone is dressed up as different detectives throughout time, and they go on a scavenger hunt through Stars Hollow. Rory and Logan have been hot and heavy for a while now. One of the clues for Rory and Logan's team takes them into Doose's Market where Dean interrupts them making out in the aisle, acts menacing, and Logan calmly asks him to take it outside. They go outside where Dean says some pretty awful things; punches are thrown, and Luke and Colin and Finn have to break up the fight. Rory pleads with Logan to let her say a few words to Dean. Logan goes off with his friends who convince him that Rory is too much trouble, and he's not in a place to have a serious relationship right now._

Chapter 6: _Rory is depressed when Logan abruptly stops seeing her. Meanwhile, Robert asks Logan if it's ok if he asks Rory on a date. Logan lies and says it's fine with him. Rory accompanies Robert to Finn's birthday party where the theme is Hollywood. Logan's there with another girl, but he's miserable. He feigns disinterest in Rory, but Colin knows better. Logan and Rory share a dance and a kiss; Rory backs away and they argue about commitment, or lack thereof. As Rory leaves, Logan decides he wants Rory enough to commit to her and devises a plan to get her back._

Chapter 7: _It's_ _Friday night dinner! Rory grudgingly tells her grandparents that she broke up with Dean. Emily suggests a night at the theater to get her mind off boys. Rory agrees, and arrives the next night only to find out that Emily set her up! Not realizing that they already have a history, Emily sends Logan and Rory to New York for the weekend._

Chapter 8: _Meeting Colin and Finn in New York, the gang sees "Wicked," then goes on a midnight run for snacks and movies to have a Rory-approved movie marathon in the hotel. Colin and Finn tease Logan about making a move on Rory, though Logan explains that they're not really on great terms and he'd be foolish to try just yet. They all fall asleep by the second movie. Colin and Finn are splayed out on each of the beds in one room, so Logan and Rory are forced to take the king bed in the adjoining room. (I know, I know, only in fic-land.) They reluctantly share the bed, but in the morning they somehow wake up in each others' arms. They share some tender moments before Finn bangs on the door, requesting aspirin for a hung-over Colin._

Chapter 9: _We open with Babette and Miss Patty gossiping about Logan and Rory. Dean overhears just enough to realize that Logan and Rory broke up, but misses the part where Logan and Rory are spending the night together. Meanwhile, Logan and Rory share the perfect day in New York, with the day tailored to Rory's interests. After ending the day with dinner at Luke's, they have a discussion about where they stand. Rory reluctantly says she'll give Logan a chance. They make a bet on whether or not Rory will like the band that he's taking her to see; if she likes them, then she has to spend the night (platonically) with Logan for a week. If she doesn't like them, Logan has to mow her lawn for a month. Of course, tricky Logan takes her to see Hep Alien, so she has no choice but to love them. She unexpectedly runs into Dean at the concert. Dean asks if they can be friends, and Rory warily accepts, admitting that if she ran into him at the Winter Carnival she wouldn't run in the other direction._

Chapter 10: _Rory wakes up next to Logan a bit confused until she remembers the bet. She also remembers that she let him kiss her at the concert and proceeds to freak out. She tells him that they need to halt the physical aspect of their relationship to make sure that they are more than just sexual attraction. Logan reluctantly agrees. Much banter later (including two original Lorelai Limericks) the gang meets up at Luke's where Finn tries again to hit on Lane. Kirk provides a few laughs. Rory and Logan are doing well and making progress until Rory sees him with another woman._

Chapter 11: _Rory vents to Paris about her situation with Logan. Logan asks Paris what's going on with Rory. She tells him and he explains that the mystery woman was his sister. Meanwhile, Rory goes to the Winter Carnival and ends up hanging out with Clara and Dean. Rory unexpectedly runs into Colin and Finn and tells them she's mad at them by extension. Later, Logan show up and tries to explain, but Rory won't listen. She goes back to hang out with Dean and drowns her sorrows in some of Patty's punch. Clara goes off with her friends, and Dean tries to put the moves on Rory despite her protestations. Finn walks over and gallantly rescues Rory. They guys show up behind him and Rory goes off with them, leaving Dean and Logan to have another confrontation, this time with Logan giving him some pretty clear warnings to stay away from Rory. Logan finally manages to explain to Rory about Honor._

Chapter 12: _Logan_ _informs Rory that he will be spending the night in Paris, so if she wants to fulfill the bet, she has to come with him. They spend a lovely day in Paris drinking coffee at the cafés, buying books by the river, dining, and generally having a marvelous time. When it comes time to check into the hotel, however, there's a catch. Logan always stays at this perfect place, but the owners have ideas about unmarried men and women staying together. Logan buys them some wedding bands and an engagement ring in order to pretend to be married. From the moment they check into the hotel, there is a new underlying tension brewing between them. The sexual tension intensifies through dinner and clubbing until finally they give into their desires._

Chapter 13: _The morning after scene! Well, more like the morning, mid-day, and afternoon scene. They handle sex with the same wit and emotion as everything else since Logan decided to be a commit-able guy. They stay an extra day in Paris before heading back to school on Monday. Logan and Rory come back to her dorm room and drop off their stuff. They…um… spend some quality time together, after which Logan goes to the common room to fetch water for Rory… in his underwear. He runs into Doyle who is dressed in Paris's robe and holds an entire conversation with Doyle in his boxers. When Logan returns to Rory's room, Paris comes out and Doyle tells her that Rory and Logan must have eloped because Logan was wearing a wedding ring. Paris won't believe him and makes some ridiculous excuse to check Rory's hands. She wonders aloud if Richard and Emily know about this supposed elopement. Rory calls Lorelai to give her an update on her love life and Lorelai demands to meet and hang out with Logan. They decide to throw an Unbirthday Party at the inn so Yalies and Stars Hollow folk can mix._

_Part of Chapter 13 we're about to continue: _

"Oh – I almost forgot," Rory said, stepping away and pulling the rings off of her finger. She tried to ignore the twinge of regret as she spoke. "Here you go," she said, holding out her hand with the rings sitting in her palm.

Logan looked down at the rings, making a split-second decision that he hoped he wouldn't regret. "Why don't you hold onto them," Logan said, folding her hand closed. "You know, as a keepsake of the weekend." Rory smiled, and he got an idea. "In fact, wear them to dinner tonight; I think we should wear them long enough to see the look on Colin's face, don't you agree?" he said mischievously.

Rory smiled back. "Forget Colin; I can't wait to see Steph's face! You should have heard her speech about how there was a line to get to you. Someone better be there to catch her if she thinks you've been gotten for life!"

"Maybe I have," Logan said with a wink. "Later, Ace."

* * *

CHAPTER 14: LORD AND LADY OF THE RINGS

* * *

Logan and Rory walked into the pub and looked around for the crew. They didn't have to look very long; certain voices were distinct among the crowd. 

"Hello love, what's your name?"

"Finn, for the last time, it's Stephanie. Ste-pha-nie! You have known me for years. You need to find new people to hit on. Do I need to cut you off?"

Rory and Logan shared a grin and headed toward their table.

"That is blasphemy and you know it. You never _ever_ separate me from a pint, you got it?"

"I dunno, man," Colin interjected. "I mean, how many of me are you seeing right now?"

"Two, which is four less than I was seeing an hour ago, so we're fine," Finn explained rationally.

"Hey, guys," Logan said, sauntering up behind them, hands in his pockets. "What's up?"

"We've been at the pub for two hours, what do you think is up?"

"Your blood alcohol level?" Rory offered from beside Logan.

"Well, look who it is!" Finn said, turning around. "I knew those two crazy kids would get back together," Finn said. "I mean it. They've got chemistry, and like I always say, where there's smoke, there's a fire!"

"No," Colin refuted. "Where there's smoke, there's you holding the matches!"

Everyone laughed. "Touché," Finn admitted.

"Ok, it's my shout," Colin said, scooting back his chair to make a trip to the bar. "Who needs a drink?"

"A drink?" Logan asked, watching Colin sway a bit as he tried to stand up.

"Yeah, you know, alcohol. The great social lubricant. Makes white people dance and what not," Colin said dryly.

Logan smiled and shook his head. "The usual."

"Double scotch on the rocks, got it. And for the lady?" he asked.

"Give me two piña coladas; I need one for each hand," Rory said with a smirk.

"Ok," Colin said. He walked over to the bar.

"No, Colin, I was kidding!" Rory called after him hopelessly. She hurried after Colin.

Finn noticed Logan was still standing. "Sit, sit, tell me all about gay Paree," he said, gesturing to Colin's now-empty seat.

Logan sat down. "Well, what can I say? We had fun," Logan said, not revealing anything. He glanced across the room at Rory who was waving her hands about as she explained to the bartender.

"I'll say," Stephanie said, noticing the unconscious smile that came over his face as he watched Rory. "So let's get to the important stuff: what did you buy me?" she asked matter-of-factly.

Logan laughed and turned his attention back to the table. "You know, with all there is to do in Paris, somehow souvenir shopping slipped my mind," Logan said. "And besides, aren't you going this summer?"

"That doesn't matter! You guys all got to go to New York together while I had to rot at my grandparents' in the Vineyard. The least you could do is buy me a trinket. Or a small Picasso. I'm not picky."

"Oh, Logan's very good with the trinkets," Rory said as she and Colin returned to the table. Colin set down the drinks in his hand and pulled a nearby chair up to the table. Rory perched on Logan's lap as they shared a secret grin. Logan gave an imperceptible wink to Rory as she pretended to casually scratch her nose with her left hand.

"Oh my God!" Stephanie shrieked.

"What?" Logan asked innocently, yawning. He happened to cover his yawn with his left hand.

"Oh my God!" Finn and Colin chorused.

"No fucking way! Are you serious?" Colin asked incredulously.

"I'm sorry, but I do have jet lag," Logan explained.

"And my nose really itches," Rory offered helpfully.

"Shut up! Did you guys elope?" Stephanie asked. "I can't believe it. There went the line. I mean, it was an unbe-fuckin-lievably long line, and you just demolished it. Unless this was like a Britney Spears wedding? Cuz then it won't really count."

"Or a Ross and Rachel," Colin said.

"No," Finn said in a rare moment of clarity, "Ross and Rachel were drunk. Ross didn't go out and buy a freaking ring. Well, not 'til another season, anyway, and that's another story entirely. I can't believe you didn't tell us! This is so uncool. I was hoping to be a best man, man."

Logan didn't respond. Instead, he tapped Rory on the shoulder. "Was that good for you? Cuz it was good for me," Logan said to Rory. She merely grinned back at him as he slid his arms back around her waist.

"Excuse me?" Stephanie said.

"Allow me to translate," Rory said. "The wedding was more of a J-Lo affair."

"As in…" Colin said, confused.

"As in it was fake," Logan said. "Gotcha!"

"Oh my God, you nearly gave me a heart attack," Finn said.

"Wow. And I was just about to ask if Rory was pregnant!" Stephanie said to Colin.

"Steph!" Rory exclaimed, shocked.

"Rory wouldn't have been pregnant," Colin snorted.

"Why not?" Stephanie demanded.

"Because," Colin said simply, "they haven't had sex yet."

"Oh my God," Rory said to herself, putting one hand over her now red face as she tried to shrink down to nothing.

"How do you know they haven't had sex yet?" Stephanie asked.

"Because he would have told us," Colin explained. "Right?" he asked Logan.

"Right," confirmed Finn, not even giving Logan a chance to answer.

"Ok, um, joke's over, let's just let it go, ok?" Logan said, finally regaining control of the conversation.

"Are you blushing?" Finn asked, looking closely at Logan. "He's blushing!" he crowed.

"Oh, they totally did it," Colin said.

"Hey, look, a beer. You love beer," Rory said, pushing Colin's drink toward him, trying to distract him.

There was a moment of silence as Stephanie, Colin, and Finn looked at Rory and Logan with knowing smiles. Rory looked everywhere in the room to avoid meeting their gazes and Logan chose to try to stare them down. Finally, Stephanie began to giggle. She was soon joined by Finn, and then, surprisingly, Colin. At that moment, their entire table erupted in laughter.

Rory clutched her stomach as she laughed. She playfully hit Logan on the arm.

"What?" he asked, rubbing his arm as if it actually hurt.

"You were going to tell them?" Rory asked, pretending annoyance.

"What? No! No, I mean, obviously, I didn't tell them!" he said defensively, pulling her closer into him and trying his damnedest to look innocent. The others paused as they took in what he was saying.

"Ha ha! You just did!" Stephanie shrieked. They all collapsed in a fit of giggles again. Rory's face turned beet red.

"Hey, ok, so, new topic," she suggested as the second round of laughter died down.

"Ok, what's up," Logan said, calming down a bit.

"My mom wants you to meet everyone in Stars Hollow," Rory said.

"What, the entire town?" Logan asked, taking a sip of his drink.

"No," Rory said, nudging his shoulder. "Just the important people. Actually, my mom wanted to hang out with you, you know, you being the new boyfriend and all, but word gets around pretty quick in my little corner of the world, so if you came over for a movie night pretty soon Babette and Miss Patty would be knocking down the door with one excuse or another and the house would fill up faster than… than… well, than something that fills up really fast. So anyway, what once was going to be a Hitchcock marathon is now an Unbirthday Party," she finished.

"Hold on, love. Are you saying that there's going to be a party, and we're not invited?" Finn said. "I'm hurt!" he said, grabbing his heart.

"Of course you're invited!" Rory said quickly. "I mean, I don't know if it's gonna be… um… your scene, but I guarantee that it will be as crazy as one of your LDB events… just a different kind of crazy."

"Oh we're in; right, everyone?" Colin asked. They nodded in agreement. "So tell us more about this – what was it, Unbirthday Party?"

"Well, I believe it's going to have an Alice in Wonderland theme, though Lord knows what Sookie and my mom will cook up," Rory said.

"Who's Sookie?" Stephanie asked.

"She's my mom's best friend and business partner. They run an inn together. The party's actually going to be held at the Dragonfly Inn," she explained.

"Cool!" Stephanie said, genuinely excited.

"I have one word," Finn announced. Everyone looked at him expectantly.

"Karaoke!" he cried.

"Oh no!" Rory and Colin moaned while Stephanie and Logan simultaneously shouted "Yes!"

"Aw, come on Ace, what do you have against karaoke?" Logan cajoled.

"Let's just say I've had bad experiences with it," Rory said.

"Oh please, how bad can they be?" Logan said dismissively.

"Hey, you try being forced to sing 'Baby Face' sans the 'baby's at your dad's girlfriend's baby shower and tell me you wouldn't be scarred for life."

"Well, this is different," Logan said simply.

"How so?"

"Because Finn will be there," Logan said. Finn nodded in acknowledgement.

Rory looked at Finn, then back at Logan. "What makes that so different?"

"Because you have to look at it this way: no matter how embarrassing you may behave, there's a good chance that Finn will embarrass himself even more."

They laughed. "No, seriously, it's true, love. And I'm damn proud of it!" Finn said.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Well, just don't expect me to sing," she said.

"Oh, I bet we could get you to do one teeny tiny song," Stephanie said, an evil gleam in her eye.

"Maybe…but only if it's a group thing!" Rory disclaimed.

"That's ok. You know anything by the Bangles?" Stephanie asked.

Rory's eyes widened. "You know, I think we're going to get along just fine," she said, lifting her glass. "Cheers!"

* * *

"Mom? Hello? Anyone home?" Rory called, walking through her front door. 

"Kitchen!" Lorelai called.

Rory dropped her stuff by the door and walked to the kitchen.

"Hey," she said, sitting down at the kitchen table.

"Hey kiddo, whatcha doin' home on a Wednesday?" Lorelai asked, offering Rory a bottle of water.

Rory took it and gave Lorelai a big cheesy grin. "I love you and miss you and need to see you in person?"

"Yeah, and that's Donald Trump's real hair," Lorelai scoffed.

"Ok, fine, so there is a distinct possibility that I need to do laundry," Rory admitted.

"Ha ha! I knew it," Lorelai crowed. "You caved so easily. I didn't even get to do my Omarosa impression," she pouted.

Rory rolled her eyes. "I'm sure there will be plenty of opportunities in the near future. Is the washer free?"

"No, I've got a load of toe socks and slutty underwear in there right now," Lorelai said.

Rory just looked at her.

"Ok, it's empty. But theoretically I _could_ have had a load of toe socks and slutty underwear in there," Lorelai pointed out.

"Advance notice would be appreciated. Got it," Rory said. She went to put her first load in.

"So do you have a guest list yet?" Lorelai asked when Rory returned.

"Oh yeah," Rory said, pulling a piece of paper out of her purse. "Ok, let's see: I've got Paris and Doyle, Marty, Colin, Finn, Stephanie, Robert - "

"Whoa whoa whoa. Robert-you-went-on-a-date-with Robert?" Lorelai asked.

"Yes, Robert-I-went-on-a-date-with Robert. It's ok, we're all friends," Rory said.

"Quite an incestuous little circle you've got going on there," Lorelai said.

"Please," Rory said.

"Ok. _Please_ tell me you don't plan on dating all of them before the year is out," Lorelai amended.

"You're impossible," Rory said, smiling as she shook her head. "Here's the complete list."

Lorelai took the list. "Great. Hey, did I tell you that Sookie's planning all these cute little English biscuits with 'eat me' written on them?"

"No, you didn't. I can only imagine!" Rory said, shaking her head.

"Yeah, and there will be little vials of drinks that will have little 'drink me' labels on them. We were thinking we could drop a lil' watered-down Patty Punch in them."

"Great idea! Just make sure there's a limit, because Finn – you remember meeting him, right?"

"And how!" Lorelai said. "Alas, too young, but if Luke ever leaves me I could go for some Aussie lovin'. He'd be like my own little slice of Heath Ledger. Or Hugh Jackman. Yeah, I'm sticking with Hugh Jackman."

"Mom!" Rory protested.

Lorelai held a hand up. "Sorry, sorry. You were saying?"

Rory tried to wipe the image of her mother and Finn out of her head. "I was saying that Finn drinks like a fish, so there's gotta be a limit to how much he can imbibe. I don't think he'll understand the power that Patty's Punch packs."

"Ok, did you plan that alliteration?" Lorelai asked warily.

"No, I'm just brilliant," Rory said, getting up and kissing her mother on the head. "I'm gonna go surprise Lane at the diner. Meet you there for supper?"

"Sure thing, sweets. See ya."

* * *

"Rory!" Lane squealed. "You're here in the middle of the week!" 

"I know!" Rory said.

"Hey, Luke? Rory's here. I'm taking my 15," Lane said, untying her apron.

"Rory's here?" Luke said, popping his head around from the kitchen. "Hey, Rory!"

"Hi, Luke," Rory said with a wave.

"How's school?" he asked, wiping his hands on a dishrag.

"Oh, you know," Rory said breezily. "Hard."

"Well I guess it's supposed to be," Luke said. He lifted the lid of the donut display. "Here, take a muffin," he offered.

"Thanks, Luke," Rory said, graciously accepting the proffered muffin as well as the coffee to go that he handed her. She reached for her purse and Luke waved her away.

"It's on me," Luke said.

"Thanks!" Rory said.

"Come on, let's go, I only have 14 minutes now," Lane said, grabbing Rory's elbow and leading her out of the diner.

"What was that all about?" Rory asked.

"What was what all about?" Lane said.

"Free coffee and muffins? Luke is not known for giving out free food unless Kirk has argued with him for over 45 minutes over the price of toast."

"I think he still feels bad for you about the whole Dean thing," Lane said, shrugging.

"Oh," Rory said, looking down. "Well… it's sweet of him to care," she said.

"Well of course he cares, he's Luke!" Lane said.

Rory grinned. "That's true. So what's new?"

"Nothing much," Lane sighed. "We're still playing local gigs, but we're finding less and less time to practice now that Brian's job is getting more involved."

"Bummer," Rory said sympathetically.

"But, on the plus side, Zach has now managed to remember to add the necessary girl items to the weekly grocery list," Lane said.

"That's good," Rory grinned. "How's things with Zach?"

"They're good. Too bad he's not getting any until we get married. I almost feel sorry for him."

"Do you think you'll get married? To Zach, I mean?" Rory asked.

"I don't know," Lane said thoughtfully. "I mean, you could say that he's my first real boyfriend. I mean, Henry didn't count because we didn't actually get to go on any real dates, and Dave sort of counts because we kissed and dated on the sly, but it didn't last very long since he went to college. But I guess I could see myself married to Zach. I mean, we're already living together."

"True, true," Rory said.

"So what's new with you?" Lane said encouragingly.

Rory smiled wryly. "How long have you got?"

Lane quickly checked her watch. "Ten minutes, but I'm sure Luke won't mind if I'm late. What's he gonna do, fire me? I'm the best – and only – waitress he's got!"

"Well, I'll try not to keep you long," Rory said. She took a deep breath. "Ok, so what was the last I told you?"

"Well, let's see," Lane said, thinking back. "Last time we really talked, Logan had randomly stopped returning your calls, but then a few weeks later you showed up at Luke's with him and his friends. _That_ I remember, because that annoying guy was with you. What's happened since then?"

Rory smiled. "Oh boy, how can I condense it into our seven remaining minutes? I'll just hit the highlights…"

* * *

"Wow," Lane said, hand in chin, mesmerized by Rory's story. "Are you serious?" 

"Completely," Rory said.

"I am so jealous!" Lane said. "I mean, normal people don't get to have their first time in a Parisian paradise. At least not people from Stars Hollow."

"Um, Lane, you do remember the whole Dean thing last year, right?"

"Well, yeah, but this was your first time with Logan. You know, you could think of it as a do-over. I mean…" Lane looked around to make sure nobody was whispering. "How was he? Was it better with him than it was with Dean?"

Rory blushed.

"Come on, Rory! You've got to remember that I'm living sexually vicariously through you here."

"With Logan… with Logan it's different than it was with Dean," Rory said, not sure how to explain it. "With Dean it seemed comfortable at first, but then it started feeling wrong, and then I felt guilty, and near the end it was basically miserable. With Logan, though…" Rory trailed off as she remembered the weekend. "Logan may be more experienced than Dean, but with Dean it seemed like he was going through the motions, and with Logan, it was like we were the only people in the universe at that moment."

"Oh my God, that's beautiful," Lane sighed.

"Yeah, but the thing is, now I don't know what to do about the ring situation."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we agreed to keep them as keepsakes of the weekend and we decided to wear them to dinner when we got back in order to play a trick on his friends, but now it's this big awkward thing and I don't know if I'm supposed to keep them on or take them off."

"Well you're not wearing them now," Lane pointed out.

"I know, but can you imagine walking into my mom's house dripping with diamonds? She'd freak!"

"Speaking of which, why haven't you told her all this?" Lane asked.

"I don't know. I know I'm supposed to be honest with her, and I want to be, but the whole Dean situation was so embarrassing, and I don't know that I really want to share sexual details about my life with her."

"I'm sure she'd understand."

"Probably, but I'm just not ready to try yet," Rory said.

"So do you have them now?" Lane asked.

"Yeah, I just put them in my pocket; here," Rory said, pulling the rings from her pocket.

"Holy crap," Lane said, picking up the ring off the table. "That is the most gorgeous ring I've ever seen!"

"I know," Rory said, feeling her face get warm again. "If I had to choose from any ring in the world, I think I would have chosen that one. It amazes me that he knew exactly what to pick given that we haven't known each other that long and we've been dating for even a shorter amount of time."

"I suppose…" Lane said. "But maybe it's that he sees you."

"What do you mean?" Rory asked.

"Well, I don't know that Dean, or Jess, ever really saw you, you know? But Logan, this society guy, could have his pick of any girl, but he chose you. That's what makes it so cool," Lane said, handing the ring back to Rory.

"I never thought of that," Rory said softly. She shook her head to clear her thoughts. "But back to the issue at hand: what am I supposed to do? I mean, this was a fake marriage, it was just a ploy to stay at his favorite hotel, and for all intents and purposes these rings should be sitting in my jewelry box at the dorm," Rory said, nervously running a hand through her hair.

"Well…why aren't they?" Lane asked simply.

"I don't know!" Rory said helplessly. "After dinner Monday night, I left before everyone else because I needed to finish my homework, and Logan came over later and fell asleep at my place and we still had the rings on, and we didn't have any classes together yesterday and we promised to spend last night apart because we keep getting…um… distracted from homework, and I haven't seen him yet today. So basically, the last time I saw him was when we woke up yesterday morning, and we still had the rings on, but I guess I should assume that he took his off when he got back to his room. What do you think?"

"I think my break is over," Lane said, getting up. Rory slipped the rings back into her pocket and they walked back to Luke's.

"So let me ask you something," Lane said.

"What?"

"Have you worn the rings this whole time?" Lane asked.

"Yeah," Rory said sheepishly.

"Interesting," Lane commented.

"It is interesting," Rory said impatiently, "but what am I supposed to do with them?"

"I dunno. Maybe you could call one of his friends and ask them if he's still wearing his. Then maybe you can follow his lead. Are there any other people you plan on surprising with a fake elopement?" Lane asked.

"No!" Rory laughed. "At least not that I'm aware of. That's a good idea, though. I'll call someone on the way home. Thanks, Lane."

"No probs. See ya!"

"See ya!"

* * *

Rory scrolled through her phone book on her cell as she sat at Stars Hollows' only stoplight. Who to call, who to call… Rory grinned as she noticed Finn's number complete with a misspelled name. No surprise there; he was half-drunk when they passed her phone around the table to enter their numbers. Finn probably wouldn't remember, so she scrolled past his name. She wasn't quite comfortable asking Colin those kinds of questions yet; she still considered him a bit acerbic for her tastes. Aha! Stephanie! She might have enough girl loyalty to not tell Logan what Rory was asking. Besides, anyone who shared aspects of Rory's pop culture upbringing had definite friend possibilities. 

"_Hello?"_

"Hey, Steph, it's Rory."

"_Oh, hi, Rory!_ _I'm sorry, did we have plans? I don't remember agreeing to anything, but then again, that never seems to absolve me from blame."_

Rory laughed a little. "No, no, we didn't have plans. I was actually calling to ask you a question. It's rather embarrassing, but I'm going out on a trust limb here."

"_Okay, shoot."_

"Have you seen Logan recently? Like yesterday or today?"

"_Sure,"_ Steph said, sounding puzzled. "_We had lunch today. Why, did he stand you up? Cuz if he did, I'll beat the crap out of him. I figure it's high time he learns how to be a boyfriend, even if we're still adjusting to the fact."_

Rory grinned. "No, nothing like that. I was just wondering… you know how we wore those wedding rings as a joke?"

"_Yeah, some joke. I nearly had a heart attack, and I thought Colin would shit his pants."_

"Wow…um…yeah, so anyway, I was just curious…was Logan still wearing his today?"

"_You know, actually, he was. I didn't know if you guys were planning on messing with other people's heads, but I asked Logan about it and he went all weird on me and said he just forgot to take it off. Personally, I thought that was a load of crap since you would think he'd take it off in the shower, but then I decided I didn't want to think of Logan in the shower and I promptly forgot about it."_

Rory thought about it. "Ok. Well…thanks."

"_No problem. Is the party still on for Saturday?"_

"Yeah, my mom's got some crazy ideas for decorations, and Sookie's going all out with the food. I think it's really going to be fun."

"_Awesome. You did tell her about karaoke, right? Because you know Finn will be singing whether or not you have it."_

Rory snickered. "Yeah, I told her. She thought it was a great idea."

"_Cool. Well, I gotta go, I'm late for dinner with my roommate."_

"Ok, see ya," Rory said.

"_Bye."_

Rory hung up her phone. Very interesting. Very interesting indeed.

* * *

Logan looked up from his laptop when he heard a knock at his bedroom door. 

"Yeah?" he called out, still reclined on his bed.

"You have a visitor," Lanny said, opening the door.

"Thanks," Rory said, walking in and shutting the door behind her. She shrugged off her jacket and draped it on his desk chair.

"Hey you," Logan said, closing the lid of his laptop and setting it aside. He grinned when Rory walked over and sat down on the edge of his bed.

"Hey, long time no see," Rory said quietly, a small smile on her face.

"Long time no see? Two days and that's the best greeting you can come up with?" Logan pouted.

"Beats 'hey you,'" Rory pointed out.

"Well I can think of a better hello than that," Logan said mischievously. Rory yelped as he grabbed her arm, sending her toppling over him.

"Hi," he whispered, cupping her face in his hands and kissing her passionately. Rory moaned and shifted on top of him, making herself more comfortable. They rolled so that Logan was hovering over Rory, their legs tangled up together. He kissed her several times in succession, finally pulling away slowly, capturing her bottom lip with his lips. Rory opened her eyes and was amazed to find herself breathless.

"Better?" he whispered, tucking some wayward hairs behind her ear.

"Much," she breathed. She closed her eyes and laid her head between his shoulder and neck. "So…" she said, sliding one arm across his chest. "I hear you don't want a divorce," she said teasingly.

"Oh yeah?" Logan said.

"Yeah. A little birdie told me that you were having trouble letting go."

Logan chuckled. "What can I say. I thought I'd skip boyfriend and cruise straight to husband."

Rory smiled against his chest. "Aww. My little overachiever."

"Yeah, I guess I forgot to take it off until Steph noticed it lunch – hey, that's your source, isn't it?" Logan said suspiciously.

"I'm sorry, I'm not at liberty to disclose my sources at this time," Rory said.

"Right," Logan said dryly. "Well, anyway, no need to worry, I have officially retired it to my safe."

"Your safe?" Rory asked, opening her eyes to look at him.

"Yeah, you know, that metal box that contains all important documents and valuables. The oh-so-important box that locks so my roommate cannot snoop. I mean, not that I don't trust Lanny, but he's got some sketchy friends."

"I see," Rory said, smiling to herself.

"And how about you, Ace?"

"Me?" Rory asked.

"Yes, you," Logan said, lifting her left hand to find it naked. "What became of your rings?"

"I gave them to Paris," she deadpanned. "She thought she could work them into one of her pieces from her craft corner."

"Very funny," Logan said wryly. He waited for Rory to take it back, but she didn't. "Seriously?" he asked.

"No, not seriously," Rory said, giving in. "I keep them close," she said mysteriously.

"How close?" Logan asked.

"Pretty close," Rory said, reaching underneath the top of her shirt to pull out a necklace. The rings hung on a simple chain.

"Hey, look at that," Logan said, reaching over and fingering the rings.

"Yeah, check out my frosting," Rory said.

"I'm sorry – your frosting?" Logan said, raising an eyebrow.

"I'm sorry, sometimes I forget you're not my mother. There are references you will never get, so don't even try," Rory sighed.

"All I can say is if you're still confusing me with your mother, I must be doing something wrong," Logan said, shaking his head.

"Well, let's see if we can't fix that," Rory said, reaching across him to turn off the light.

"I like the way you think, Ace. I like the way you think," Logan said, pulling the covers over them.

* * *

So there you go! This ended up being more of a set up chapter for the chapters to come. I was going to go ahead and put the party in this one, but it was getting too long. So… **next time, on The Fortune Cookie's Always Right**: Lorelai throws an Unbirthday Party to allow Rory's Yale friends to meet her Stars Hollow friends, but what happens when some uninvited guests show up? 

(Just a teaser: there will be much more banter and references, and I'm sure you can only imagine all the Stars Hollows characters – and I mean characters in the sense of whacked-out people – mixing with the Yalies. I mean, can you imagine Miss Patty battling Finn for karaoke time?) Please review and I promise to update sooner. Thank you for reading and reviewing! Y'all rock!


	15. Naked City

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Here you go, folks. A relatively fast update! Woo hoo! And just so you know, this chapter is kind of **M**, ok? There's one scene that had to be a lil' sumpin-sumpin in order for something to happen… you'll see what I mean. Oh yeah, and there are little bits of stuff from Season 5 episodes sprinkled here and there. And I know, I know, the party was supposed to be in this chapter, but I had so much other material that preceded it that it's gonna have to be next chapter. On with the show!

* * *

CHAPTER 15: NAKED CITY

* * *

"It'll be fine," Lorelai said, breezing out her front door.

"Do you know how much electricity you're wasting?" Luke demanded.

Lorelai pretended to think about it. "Enough to power a leprechaun village?"

Luke sighed. "I don't know why I bother," he muttered to himself. He followed Lorelai out the door, shutting it and pointedly locking it.

"I bet it would be cute," Lorelai said thoughtfully.

"What?" Luke said, on the verge of irritation.

"My leprechaun village."

"Oh, here we go," Luke said, leaning against his truck, ready for the impending diatribe.

"It could have a little leprechaun king and lots of little leprechaun villagers, only they won't wear green, they'll wear blue, because green is so last season," Lorelai reasoned.

"Uh huh," Luke said, his eyes beginning to glaze over.

"And they'll eat with tiny little Barbie-sized forks," she finished. She paused. "Wait – I changed my mind."

"You're going to turn off the TV?" Luke said hopefully.

"No no no, silly! I've abandoned the leprechaun village. I'm now powering a Barbie Dream House."

"Dare I ask? What was wrong with the leprechaun village," Luke said, amazed he was buying into her crazy rambling like always.

"Well, they wouldn't share their gold," Lorelai said logically.

"Of course," Luke said sarcastically.

"And the Dream House is pink," Lorelai said, as if that cemented her decision.

"Look," Luke said, attempting to re-focus the conversation. "It's wasteful to leave the TV on when you leave the house."

"But there's a very good reason," Lorelai argued. "We had to pause the movie, and we need to pick up at that exact point."

"Isn't the whole point of DVDs that you can quickly and easily return to any point on the disc at your will?" Luke asked.

Lorelai gave him the 'duh' look. "No, the point of DVDs is to make the consumer re-buy every movie they own on VHS just because it's a new format that purports to be better but really still gets scratched easier and has only one redeeming value: the Special Features."

"Ok, well, I agree with you there," Luke said. He then realized that Lorelai just navigated the conversation away again, and he was suddenly very tired of arguing.

"You know, you just wait," he said. "Someday, I'll be the man of the house, and then you'll have to listen to me," he said triumphantly.

Lorelai leaned in conspiratorially. "Honey, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret courtesy of Nia Vardalos: The man may be the head of the family, but the woman is the neck, and she can turn the head any way she wants."

Luke just looked at her. "I'm never gonna win this one, am I?"

"Nope!" Lorelai said, giving him a quick kiss. "You know, that was a great movie."

"What was?" Luke said warily.

"Man of the House. Boy, Rory used to make me watch that for hours on end," Lorelai reminisced.

"The cheerleader movie with Tommy Lee Jones?" Luke asked, confused.

"No no no, the Chevy Chase movie with Jonathan Taylor Thomas. Rory, along with every other 12 year old, was going through a total JTT phase. She was in love with the boy, and we had to watch the crappiest of all movies to get a glimpse of him. Pinocchio is completely ruined for me."

"Pinocchio?" Luke asked dubiously.

"You don't wanna know," Lorelai said, waving the comment away. Suddenly, her phone rang. "Damn and blast! I bet that's my mother. I bet her psychic Emily powers know that I am going to be late to Friday night dinner. I bet she knew you were distracting me with the Mountie sex."

"I was not distracting you with Mountie sex, we were watching a movie!" Luke said, exasperated. "Answer your damn phone."

"Fine," Lorelai said dramatically. "But I was picturing you with the Canadian Mountie hat, so it still counts." She pulled her phone out of her purse. "Hello, Lorelai Gilmore, and I'm not thinking about sex," she answered.

"_Gross, Mom."_

"What? I said I was _not_ thinking about sex," Lorelai pouted.

"I'm gonna…" Luke said, gesturing to his truck.

"Go, go. Wait – kiss!" Lorelai said. Luke obliged and kissed her before driving back to the diner.

"_I can't kiss you, I'm miles away,"_ Rory said.

"I was talking to Luke," Lorelai said. She got into her car and began the drive to Hartford. "Poor guy. I think I exhausted him."

"_Why do you say that? And don't let it be dirty, I hate when it's dirty," _Rory warned.

"No no no, I think I exhausted him with a battle of wits. I'm pretty sure I lost him somewhere between the leprechauns and the Greek wedding."

"_That's usually where you lose people,"_ Rory agreed sympathetically.

"So what's up?" Lorelai said.

"_Well, I just wanted to give you a heads up on dinner tonight."_

"Why, are we having roasted cute fluffy animal and you want me to bring secret Fruit Roll-Ups?"

"_Quite possibly, but no, that's not why I called. I just wanted to let you know that Logan is coming to dinner tonight."_

"Oh reeeally," Lorelai cooed.

"_Yes, really. I just wanted you to know."_

"Ok, but not to be rude, why exactly are you hauling Daniel into the lion's den?"

"_Well grandpa called the other day to ask about a book, and Logan answered my phone, which was mistake number one, and they got to talking about something… what? Oh, Logan says they were talking about Scotch - "_

"Tape?"

"_Beverage."_

"Ah. Cuz, you know, I was having SNL flashbacks. Plaid everywhere."

"_I'm sure. Listen, I'm going to hang up now. Logan is going to tell me why apparently his family gatherings are worse than ours."_

"Ok, but tell him about the time I wore - "

"_I already told him. Apparently he's got better."_

"Wow! Fill me in later."

"_Will do. Bye, Mom."

* * *

_

"Caesar, I need a tuna melt, pronto!" Lane called behind the counter. She sighed as she heard the door open. Why did people always come in right when she was trying to close? She was so close to getting Kirk out the door.

"Can I help you?" she asked, turning around.

"Um…hi," Dean said.

"Hey…" Lane said. When Dean didn't say anything else, she decided to help him along. "Can I get you anything?"

That seemed to snap Dean out of it. "Oh, um, yeah. Yeah, three burgers all the way and three orders of fries."

"Ok, comin' right up," Lane said, putting the order in. Dean watched her, rocking back and forth on his heels awkwardly.

"So… big night with the guys?" Lane offered.

"Yeah, we're um, gonna go out, and I got elected to be the food guy. I think Kyle is handling the…beverages," Dean said uncomfortably.

"Right," Lane replied.

"So," Dean said. "You talk to Rory lately?" he ventured.

"Yeah, she came by the other day."

"Huh. Um, did she mention me? At all?" Dean asked, part hopefully and part fearfully.

"Not really…sorry. I mean, I think she told me that you guys hung out a while back, but that was about the extent of it."

Dean exhaled. "So, no details then."

"Nope, sorry."

"Right. Well. Can I ask you something?" Dean said.

"Sure," Lane replied, not really sure at all, but she didn't know what else to say.

"Do you think…Do you think I still have a chance with Rory? I mean, I think I have a chance, but I'm not completely sure."

"Well…" Lane was suddenly uncomfortable. "Didn't you see her at the Winter Carnival?"

"Yeah," Dean replied cautiously.

"I can't remember, but I think she was with Logan then."

Dean's face darkened. "Not at the Carnival, she wasn't."

Lane shrugged. "Well, I don't know when they officially got back together, but they're dating now."

"Huh," Dean said. "Well, if it's only been a week, it can't be that serious, can it?" a slow smile spreading across his face.

Lane sighed. "I don't know, Dean. Hey, here's your order," she said, gladly handing him the tall bag.

"Thanks. See ya," he said jauntily. Of course it's not that serious; Rory was only with this jerk temporarily. She would come back to him if he asked her to. Besides, she'd _slept_ with him. She probably hadn't slept with Richie Rich; it wasn't her style. Dean was all of a sudden feeling better about his prospects.

Lane regarded him curiously. "See ya…"

* * *

"Rory! Logan! So wonderful to see you! Oh you look perfect, don't they look perfect?" Emily said, beaming at the couple from the front doorway.

"Emily, let them in the door first," Richard said, pretending to be cranky.

"Hello Emily, thank you for inviting me," Logan said smoothly as Emily led the way into the foyer.

"Oh don't be silly, you're welcome anytime," Emily replied.

"Richard," Logan said, shaking Richard's hand.

"Logan, my boy!" he said, clapping Logan on the back.

"Hello, Rory," Richard said, giving her a kiss on the cheek.

"Hi, Grandpa."

"Richard, Emily, I brought something for you," Logan said, extending one arm that was laden with gifts.

"Oh, Logan, you shouldn't have!" Emily said, delighted.

"Emily, some marzipan; I heard somewhere you might like it," Logan said, winking at Rory. She made a playful yuck face.

"Lovely, simply lovely," Emily gushed.

"And Richard, if I remember correctly, Macallan is your Scotch of choice?" Logan said, presenting a bottle.

"Good man," Richard said approvingly.

"Shall we?" Emily said, gesturing to the sitting area. Rory took a deep breath and Logan shot her a reassuring look as they followed the Gilmores in for drinks.

* * *

"You're late," Emily said sharply.

"Hi, Mom, it's great to see you too. Of course, you may take my coat, thank you _so_ much," Lorelai said, cocking her head to one side.

"You're impossible," Emily harrumphed.

"Sorry," Lorelai said dramatically. "You wouldn't believe what it took to get me here. First, I broke a heel, and then I had to go through 87 pairs of shoes to find another pair that matched this dress, and then when I got in the car, well, wouldn't you know I was practically out of gas, and I know that you wouldn't want me to run out of gas on a deserted highway, and when I did get on the highway, traffic was really bad due to a-"

"Oh spare me," Emily said, rolling her eyes. "Come in, come in. We're still having drinks."

"Well, halleluiah! Lead me to Martiniland," Lorelai said.

"Martiniland?" Emily said with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes, it's right next to Margaritaville," Lorelai replied.

"The things you say," Emily said, shaking her head.

"Hey Dad, Rory, Logan, nice to see you again," Lorelai said, sitting down.

"Lorelai," Richard said.

"Hey Mom," Rory said.

"Lorelai," Logan said slowly. He wasn't sure how much Lorelai knew about his situation with Rory.

"Your martini," Richard said, handing Lorelai a drink.

"Thanks, Dad. Boy, you will not believe what I had to go through to get here tonight," Lorelai said, prepared to launch into her why-I'm-late story.

"Not now, Lorelai," Emily said, cutting her off.

"But you never let me get to the good part," Lorelai pouted. "It involved at least two of the Village People."

Emily ignored her and turned her attention to Logan.

"So, Logan, you're going to lead the Huntzberger Corporation into the 21st Century, eh?" Richard said with a knowing grin.

"If my father has anything to say about it, yes sir," Logan replied, taking a sip of his drink.

"So will you be living in Hartford when you graduate?" Emily asked.

"Most likely, although I think a bit of travel at the beginning is expected."

"Travel?" Rory asked, suddenly interested.

"Yeah, you know, visiting the various papers we own, getting to know the editors, all that jazz," Logan said easily. But Rory didn't miss the flash in his eyes when the subject came up. She made a mental note to ask him about it later.

"But you'll be settling in Hartford," Emily said warmly.

"Perhaps," Logan said, setting his drink down.

"Yeah, or perhaps he's planning a move to Indiana," Lorelai suggested helpfully.

"Why, what's in Indiana?" Emily said, narrowing her eyes.

"Are you kidding me? Naked City! Who wouldn't want to live in the Sun Aura Nudist Resort? The place has a giant lady's leg sundial."

"A giant lady's leg sundial? Really, Lorelai," Emily snorted.

"So, your father told me that your sister is recently engaged," Richard said.

"That's true; Josh finally popped the question," Logan confirmed.

"You must be thrilled," Emily intimated.

"Yeah, Josh is a good guy," Logan said easily.

"Are they going to have the wedding in Martha's Vineyard?" Emily asked excitedly.

"I believe so," Logan said noncommittally.

"I just love weddings in the Vineyard," Emily said. There was an expectant pause.

"Yeah, they're nice," Logan said. Was it getting hot in here? As magical as that weekend in Paris was, and as cute as their whole ring debate was, this real world pressure was beginning to get to him.

"You know what I love? Cheese. I mean, there's so many kinds!" Lorelai interjected.

"Lorelai, what _are_ you talking about?" Emily said.

"So, I suppose your family expects you to start settling down, young man," Richard said, smiling at Logan.

"I think they're just hoping I make it through graduation first," Logan said with a charming smile.

"Of course, of course. But after graduation, I suspect that it won't be long before they'll be expecting the next generation of Huntzbergers to be coming along," Richard said with a wink.

"Grandpa!" Rory said, shocked.

"What? What did I say?" Richard said, innocently looking around.

"Now now, there's plenty of time before you have to think about that," Emily said. Logan smiled in relief. "I mean, two years at least!"

Logan nearly choked on his Scotch.

"Dinner is ready," said the maid. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

"I'm exhausted," Rory said, slumping on the hood of Logan's car. She gave the Gilmore mansion an evil look.

"I tried to cover for you, but you know what they're like," Lorelai said apologetically. She looked at Logan, who was looking rather shell-shocked. "Poor kid. Is this the first time he's been Gilmored?"

"Yes," Rory said, patting Logan's arm in a reassuring manner. "You ok there? Need some air? Water? A time machine?"

"Massive amounts of alcohol?" Lorelai suggested.

Logan finally cracked a smile. "All of the above," he admitted. "Kind of the polar opposite of one of my family dinners, but no less intense."

"What, as in screaming and shouting about how disappointing you are as opposed to how fabulous you are?" Lorelai asked in a been-there-done-that voice.

"Pretty much," Logan said.

"Oh, we have those too," Lorelai said. "But boy, do they looooove you!" she said, grinning at Logan.

"I'm glad, but I kinda wish they'd love me less!" Logan said.

"Well, I can arrange that for the next dinner, but just remind me to give you a map of the escape routes beforehand," Lorelai said. She regarded the kids for a moment. Rory looked weary and a bit surprised; she obviously hadn't put that much thought into the future, and wasn't ready for the Gilmore questioning squad. Logan had a similar expression, although his belied experience with dodging questions about the future.

"Ok, that's it," Lorelai announced.

"What?" Logan and Rory chorused.

"I'm calling Luke. We need emergency fries. It's time for a movie marathon!" Lorelai said.

"Good idea," Rory said, perking up at the thought of some real food. "I mean, what _was_ that?"

"I dunno, but I've learned to stop asking," Lorelai said. "Foie gras sounded so cool before I knew what it was."

"I thought the pâté was fairly decent," Logan offered.

"Are you kidding me? Pâté, French for 'dog food'?" Lorelai said, astounded. "We need to re-educate him."

"Re-educate in the Chinese Cultural Revolution sense?" Rory asked.

"No, re-educate in the American Food Pyramid sense," Lorelai replied.

"Ah," Rory said. "I understand. We'll follow you," she said authoritatively.

"Good. You get the movies, I'll get the grub," Lorelai said, hopping into her car. She rolled down the window before backing out of the driveway. "Hey, Rory?"

"Yeah?"

"Make sure to tell him about the Rory curtain. Bye!" Lorelai said, driving away.

"Mom!" Rory whined fruitlessly.

"The Rory curtain?" Logan asked in amusement, getting into the car.

Rory sighed. "Well, it all started when I told Taylor…"

* * *

"We've got the movies!" Rory called as she opened the front door. "Mom?" she called when she got no answer.

Lorelai popped out from around the corner. "Here, before I forget," she said, thrusting a videotape at Rory.

"What's this?" Rory said, looking down at the label.

"Grey's Anatomy. I know you missed last Sunday's," Lorelai gave Logan a knowing smile, which he pretended not to see, "and this weekend is a new one, so you need to be caught up."

"Thanks. Hey, would you tape The Office for me too? I have a project meeting on Thursday," Rory requested.

"Ok, I don't get it," Luke said, overhearing them in the kitchen. He came into the hallway. "Why don't you just get TiVo?" he asked.

"Because it costs too much," Lorelai replied.

"Let me get this straight," Luke said, holding his hands out in front of him. "You have an _entire_ closet full of VHS tapes, which, by the way, is a dying technology, yet you won't just pay for a box that gets rid of the commercials?"

"I didn't know you even knew what TiVo was, Luke," Rory said curiously.

"Come on," Lorelai said, ignoring Luke, "let's put in the first movie."

"Whoa whoa whoa, wait a minute. Are you telling me that we left the TV and DVD player on for hours, all under the premise that you couldn't lose your place in the movie we were watching, and now you're going to take it out? Just like that?" Luke asked Lorelai.

"Don't worry, Luke, it'll be fine. I can just skip to the part we were at next time," Lorelai said logically.

Luke was speechless.

"Ok, clearly you two are having issues. Logan and I are gonna fix the food trays," Rory said, leading Logan into the kitchen.

Lorelai grinned at Luke. "Trying to figure out what you see in me?"

"Yep," Luke said. "Can't figure it out," he deadpanned.

Lorelai sauntered up to him and gave him a mind-blowing kiss.

"Oh yeah," he said softly. Lorelai smiled and walked into the living room. "Hey," Luke said in a half-whisper, following her onto the couch. "What's with this Logan kid?"

"What do you mean?" Lorelai replied in the same tone.

"Is he dating her? Is he her boyfriend? Is he good enough for her?"

"Whoa, hey, MacArthur, slow down," Lorelai said. "Yes, they are dating, and yes, I think he's officially her boyfriend, and of course he's not good enough for her, this my baby we're talking about!"

"Huh," Luke said, looking in the direction of the kitchen.

"But…I think he's serious about her, probably loves her, so that gives him brownie points," Lorelai said. "Now shush, they'll be here any second."

As if on cue, Rory and Logan entered the living room, laden with trays of junk food.

"Hey, so what are we watching first?" Rory asked, setting her tray on the coffee table.

"Well," said Lorelai slyly, "Luke really wanted to have a JTT marathon."

"What? No, uh uh, no way," Luke said.

"Oh yesss!" Rory said.

"I'm sorry, JTT?" Logan asked, one eyebrow raised.

"Jonathan Taylor Thomas," Lorelai explained innocently. She waited a beat before laughing. "Just kidding. Why don't you pick," she offered generously.

"Ok…um…how about the Godfather trilogy?" Logan suggested.

"Um, I vote no, too much blood too late at night," Rory said apologetically.

"Ok," Logan said gracefully. "What about 'A Very Long Engagement'?"

Lorelai snorted. "A Very Long Movie. Sorry, but we don't do subtitles. The whole point in watching a movie is avoiding reading."

"Yeah, unless you count the time that we watched 8 ½, Amelie, and Seven Samurai and turned off the subtitles," Rory pointed out.

"Oh yeah! We made up the dialogue," Lorelai remembered. She paused to honor the memory. "Ok, well, when in doubt, you know what we have to watch."

"Willy Wonka?" Rory asked. Lorelai nodded. "Sorry, Mom, but we watched that during the infamous New York kidnapping weekend," Rory said.

"Is this something I need to know about?" Luke asked warily.

"No!" Lorelai, Rory, and Logan chorused.

"Ok, good," Luke said.

"Ok, well, let's see…" Lorelai said, perusing the stack of movies. "Ah hah! Perfect!" She popped in a DVD.

"You're just in a musical mood, aren't ya?" Rory said.

"What can I say? Grease is the word!" Lorelai and Rory grinned and settled down on the floor pillows. Luke and Logan gave each other dubious looks.

"There's no arguing, just go with it," Luke said tiredly, even though they knew he loved it.

"It's ok," Logan said. "I've experienced a Gilmore movie marathon before."

Luke eyed him. "Does anybody want drinks?"

"That's what we forgot," Rory said, slapping her forehead. "Pepsi, please!" she quipped.

"I want a Pepsi too," Lorelai said, "but only if it's made with beer."

"One beer and one Pepsi, got it," Luke said. "Hey, Logan, you wanna help me get drinks?"

"Um, sure," Logan said, following him into the kitchen.

Luke opened the refrigerator door. "What do you want?" he asked.

"A beer is fine," Logan said. Luke got out a Pepsi and three beers, holding one out in front of Logan as he closed the door with his foot. Logan went to take it, but Luke pulled it back out of his reach. Logan looked at him questioningly.

"Look, I know her dad isn't around to say this, and Lorelai's probably too nice to, but if you hurt her, I'll find you, you got me?" Luke said.

Logan was somewhat startled, but then grinned. "Don't worry – I love her too."

"You do?" Luke asked, surprised.

"Yeah, but I haven't exactly told her, I think it's too soon, and I don't wanna freak her out. The thought freaks me out enough as it is. So don't say anything, ok?"

Luke was taken aback, but gave Logan his beer. "Yeah, sure. Ok."

Logan smiled his thanks.

Luke started to follow him out of the kitchen. "So she doesn't know? Really?"

"Well, I sort of have this well-earned reputation of being a playboy. I've never really had a girlfriend, but I'm trying," Logan said honestly.

"Huh. Alright then," Luke said, nudging him into the living room. "We've got the drinks!" he announced.

Rory and Lorelai ignored him. They were too busy singing.

* * *

"Rory," Lorelai whispered.

"What?" Rory whispered back.

"Look," Lorelai said. They both turned around to see Luke and Logan fast asleep on opposite ends of the couch.

"I can't believe it!" Rory said.

"I know, I mean, who sleeps when Cha Cha DiGregorio dances?"

"Apparently these two," Rory said.

"Amateurs," Lorelai scoffed. Her face softened. "Aww, but aren't they cute?"

"Yeah," Rory admitted, always amazed at how innocent Logan looked when he was sleeping.

"Ok, kiddo, we should put them to bed," Lorelai said, slowly standing up.

"I suppose so; lots of party prep for tomorrow, right?"

"Yeah. Lu-uke," Lorelai said in a sing-song voice. Rory turned off the TV.

Luke brushed away her poke in the arm.

"Lu-uke," she said again.

"Hmph," Luke said.

She tried another strategy. "Caesar's burning the toast," she said.

"What? I told him he's not allowed to…" Luke said, sitting up straight.

"Ha ha!" Lorelai said triumphantly. "Up to beddie bye, mister."

"Fine," Luke said with a yawn. He stood up and trudged to the stairwell.

"I'm just gonna take him upstairs," Lorelai explained quickly.

"Wow, you almost did that without blushing," Rory said with a grin.

Lorelai smiled back. "Is this weird?" she asked. "This is weird," she repeated.

"Well, yeah, it's weird, but, I mean, don't you think it's a good weird?"

Lorelai thought about it. "I guess. It's only gonna be good weird if I get my own bathroom," she amended.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Goodnight, Mom."

"Goodnight, sweets," Lorelai said, giving Rory a kiss on the cheek.

"Goodnight Logan," she said, leaning over his sleeping form.

"Night," Logan mumbled, sinking futher into the couch.

"Oh, and Logan can stay the night," Lorelai said to Rory.

"Ok," Rory said, tucking her hair behind her ears.

"I just hope he knows that the couch is all kinds of lumpy," Lorelai said.

"Oh, well, um, he can stay in my room…" Rory said sheepishly.

"Oh!" Lorelai said, trying to cover her surprise. "Of course. Ok, well, um, goodnight," she said, pretending to be cool with it.

Rory's face flushed with embarrassment, but she made a quick recovery. After all, it was her mom's turn to be weirded out!

"Ugh, you're soooo heavy," Lorelai said, halfway pushing Luke up the stairs.

Rory grinned. "Logan," she said. Logan shifted. "Logan," she repeated.

"Hm? I'm awake, I'm awake," Logan said, rubbing his eyes and blinking furiously. Rory just looked at him. "Sorry…how long was I out?" he said.

"I don't know," Rory said.

"Ouch!" Logan exclaimed, rubbing a kink in his neck.

"Long enough for you to get that kink in your neck," she said. "Serves you right. You fell asleep before the dance was even halfway over."

"Come on, Ace, I ate the equivalent of two dinners in a 3 hour period!"

"That's no excuse!" Rory said. "Remind me to tell you about the great thanksgiving of four dinners. Come on," she said, pulling him up off the couch. He followed her into her room and shut the door behind them.

Rory helped Logan pull off his shirt before changing into her pajamas. He kept rubbing his neck and whimpering.

"Oh, fine," Rory said. "Get on the bed."

"Yes ma'am!" Logan said enthusiastically.

"Not like that, you idiot," she said, playfully shoving him. "I'm going to give you a back massage because if you go to sleep with a kink in your neck like that, you'll just feel that much worse when you wake up."

"I didn't know you did massages," Logan said.

"Yeah, well, I'm no Phoebe Buffay, but I can certainly try." Rory said, straddling his back and beginning to rub his shoulders. "Besides, you're my lobster," she said.

Logan gave her a lazy smile. "Oh yeah?"

"Yeah," Rory said, leaning down to give him a brief kiss. It quickly turned into more, and she broke contact, pushing him down and continuing the massage.

* * *

"All done," Rory said, flopping down beside him. "Oh my God, that was great," Logan mumbled into the pillow.

"I'm sorry, what was that?" Rory asked with a giggle.

"I said I'm so relaxed, thank you," Logan said. He grinned mischievously. "My turn now."

"No, you just had a turn," Rory said.

"No, I'm going to give you a massage," Logan said with a wicked grin.

Rory smiled and sat up, allowing him to remove her top.

"Is it hot in here?" she said breathlessly.

"Yeah, let's open the window," Logan said.

"No, wait!" Rory said. Logan was already up at the window, and she quickly slid underneath the covers.

"What?" he asked.

"Don't, Babette!" she explained.

"If you're talking about your crazy neighbor, their house doesn't even face this way."

"But…" Rory was embarrassed to continue. "But if they hear any unusual noises, she might come looking."

"You planning on making unusual noises?" Logan said, eyebrows raised. Rory just gave him a dirty look.

"Well we'll just have to be quiet," Logan said.

"Logan, come on," Rory complained.

"What, are you scared, Ace?"

"You bet I'm scared! If they see us, Morey will write a song about it and Babette will name a cat after the song."

"Come on, live dangerously, Ace," Logan said seductively. His tone changed to playfulness. "Besides, it's hardly voyeuristic if there's no one to voyeur."

"Well, you do have a point," Rory admitted.

"Besides," Logan said, sliding the window open, "isn't the prospect of getting caught a little exciting?"

Rory's breath quickened. "You know what, it is a nice night," Rory said, boldly getting out from under the covers. She was suddenly lit up in moonlight. "And it's mighty hot in here…the breeze will do us some good."

Logan chuckled softly. "You do me some good, Ace," he said, kneeling on the bed in full view of the window. She climbed over to meet him.

* * *

"Man, where are we going? I don't think I can walk anymore," Kyle complained.

"Just a little bit further," Dean slurred.

"Dude, I need to either sit down or puke," one of the guys said.

"Shh!" Dean said. "We're really close, look, we're already in her backyard."

"Are you sure this is a good idea?" Kyle said. He was the most sober one there.

"Come on, guys. I gotta see her, I love her! I gotta tell her I love her," Dean said.

"Don't wake her up," someone whined.

"Shut up," Dean said, determinedly walking through the bushes.

* * *

"Do you hear something?" Logan asked Rory in a whisper.

"What, are you messing with me? Or chickening out?" Rory said. "I thought you were so daring," she goaded.

"Oh, you want daring?" Logan said dangerously. He leaned away from her and sat straight up, pulling her with him.

"Logan!" she gasped. His smirk changed to a face of pleasure as she positioned her legs to kneel on either side of him and sank down.

"Oh God," he moaned.

"Shh!" she giggled. She stopped giggling when he began to move her up and down. She was completely focused on Logan until she saw something in her peripheral vision. "Did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Logan said, straining to concentrate on her words.

"Oh shit!" they heard from the bushes.

"That!" Rory said worriedly.

Outside, the whole gang of guys watched as Rory's entire moving torso was visible through the window. They started to simultaneously catcall and shush each other.

"Look at her-"

"I see them!"

Dean froze in his spot. "No," he said quietly to himself.

"Yeah, baby!" Kyle said.

"No!" Dean said, louder.

Rory suddenly looked out the window in mortification. "Oh my God," she said, making eye contact with Dean. She grabbed a sheet.

Dean locked gazes with Logan. Dean had a murderous glint in his eye, which Logan returned.

Kyle and the guys were laughing until Kyle pulled on Dean's arm. "Come on, man, let's get out of here."

Dean was rooted to the spot until three guys started pulling. "Let's go."

Inside, Logan lay back down on the bed. Rory was silent and shaking, and he gathered her into his arms.

"Well…that was…" Logan said.

"Not good," Rory finished.

"Well, other than the obvious, why's that?" Logan said.

"Because… it's just…" Rory said, at a loss for words.

"So porn star of you?" Logan offered with a smirk.

"Logan! I am not that girl. I mean, I'm not the girl who has sex in front of windows with guys."

"So, are you telling me you're the girl that has sex in front of windows with girls?"

"No, of course not."

"Well, that's good to know."

There was another awkward silence.

Logan was the first to speak again. "You don't think they'll tell…"

"No, of course not," Rory said. "I mean, I don't think they would… and besides, they were drunk, I mean, it's not like they'll really remember this in the morning, will they?"

"Probably not," Logan reassured her. She settled back into his arms.

"They won't remember a thing in the morning."

* * *

Dum dum dum! Wow. Ok, so, next chaper is DEFINITELY the party, and Gilmore-isms will be posted before midnight tonight for this chapter. As always, review please!  



	16. We're All Mad Here

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **First off – I apologize! Months without an update, I suck! I still love you, I hope you still love me. Secondly, hello to all the new people reading this story! I hope you enjoy my 'I'm-pretending-I'm-writing-the-real-show' style.

So… I'm not going to give you the detailed summary like in Chapter 14, but in case you've forgotten this story, it's the one with Rory and Dean together at the beginning slowly but surely broken up by Dean's outrageous behavior and mistrust and Rory's growing attraction for Logan. It's also the story that includes:

- the New Year's Eve Ball

- the LDB Stars Hollow Scavenger Hunt

- the surprise trip to New York

- the bet that landed Rory in Logan's bed (platonically)

- the trip to Paris that landed Rory in Logan's bed (not platonically)

- the RINGS

- the inadvertent peep show

- and now… finally… the unbirthday party!

* * *

CHAPTER 16: WE'RE ALL MAD HERE

* * *

Rory wandered out of her bedroom, stifling a yawn as she headed straight for the coffee. The kitchen was uncharacteristically filled with yummy breakfast smells. 

"Good morning," Rory said, walking in to find Luke cooking a full breakfast and Lorelai sipping coffee in her robe.

"Oh, hey, good morning, Rory," Luke said, trying to act as if it were completely natural for him to be cooking her breakfast… in her kitchen.

Rory grinned. She could get used to this! She sat down at the kitchen table with Lorelai.

"You're all dressed," Lorelai said.

"Yes I am," Rory replied. She left Logan in bed to shower and get ready for the day. They hadn't spoken a word about the previous night's activities.

"Hm," Lorelai said, squinting at her daughter who was entirely too chipper for 8:00 in the morning. "What's with the scarf?"

"What do you mean?" Rory said defensively.

"Your neck, the scarf," Lorelai said, pointing.

"Oh," Rory said, touching the scarf wrapped whimsically around her throat. "I was feeling very Mary Tyler Moore this morning."

"Ah. Looks like you'll make it after all," Lorelai quipped.

"Ha ha," Rory said dryly. "Speaking of clothes, is that my sweater?" she said in a slightly accusatory tone.

Lorelai looked down at the shirt underneath her robe. "No," she said quickly.

"Yes it is!" Rory cried.

"Nuh uh," Lorelai protested.

"Yuh huh!" Rory insisted. "What, am I gonna have to pull a Laverne DeFazio?" she said, cocking her head to one side.

"Fine, fine, it's your sweater," Lorelai conceded.

"Thank you," Rory said triumphantly. "You better wash it. Your boobs are gonna stretch it out."

"Aw geez," Luke said from the stove.

"No way! Your boobs are totally bigger than mine. I thought we'd already established that," Lorelai said.

"Can you not talk about this now? While I'm in the room?" Luke said, turning around and waving a spatula at them.

"Not talk about what?" Logan asked, coming into the kitchen. He gave Rory a kiss on the forehead and sat down beside her.

"Good morning," Rory said, giving Logan a silly smile.

"Oh boy, somebody got some last night," Lorelai said knowingly.

"Mom!" Rory said, blushing.

"Yeah, can we not talk about that either?" Luke said painfully.

"Fine, fine," Lorelai said. "Good morning, Logan," she said in a very proper voice.

"Good morning," Logan said cautiously.

"So, it's the big party day, are you looking forward to it?" Lorelai said, sipping her coffee.

"You bet," Rory said, grateful for the subject change. "I think I'm most anxious to see what happens when Miss Patty meets Finn."

"Why's that?" Logan asked, curious.

"Let's just say that they are the two most… active personalities from each of the two camps, and I, for one, am quite interested to see how they…" Rory gestured mid-air, trying to find the right word, "…mesh," she finished.

"I see," Logan said.

"No, you don't, but you will," Rory said impishly. Logan raised an eyebrow.

Luke brought two gigantic platters of food to the kitchen table. "Ok, everybody. Dig in."

* * *

Rory cracked open her bedroom door and peered into the hallway, only her head visible to the outside. 

"I feel like everyone knows… do they look like they know?" she said nervously.

Logan came up behind her, putting one hand on her waist and the other on the door frame, his head peeking out just above hers.

"Ace, come on, nobody knows. I mean, your mom thinks she knows, but the very few people who actually do know were too wasted to remember and probably aren't invited anyway," Logan reasoned.

"That's true," Rory conceded. She reluctantly opened the door all the way and stepped out into the hall, which was rapidly filling with guests. One of the waiters from the inn passed by, balancing a silver tray on one upturned hand.

"Here, have a 'Drink Me,'" Logan suggested, lifting a vial off of the passing tray.

Rory eyed it suspiciously. "Do you know what proof this is?" she said, raising her eyebrows.

"No, but I do know that it will take the edge off," Logan said.

"Ok, then," Rory said, uncorking the vial. "Cheers!" She downed it in one gulp. "Mmm, you know, this is really good. Maybe I'll have another," she said, looking for the waiter.

"Ohhhhh no," Logan said, distracting her. "I said drink enough to take the edge off, not enough to take your shirt off."

"Ha ha," Rory said dryly. "Let's mingle," she suggested.

"After you," Logan said with a wide hand gesture. He shut the door behind them.

Rory led the way into the party. "Oh, and before I forget, watch out for -"

"Ow!" Logan exclaimed, jumping forward. Miss Patty sauntered by, winking at Logan before she went into the next room.

Rory tried to contain her laughter. "Miss Patty," she finished weakly. "She pinches."

"Thanks for the warning, Ace," Logan said wryly.

"Anytime," she replied sweetly.

Logan frowned and took her hand, following her into the crowd. He rubbed his backside, muttering to himself. "That was my own personal butt…"

"Come on, Donkey," Rory said, rolling her eyes.

* * *

"Rory! Hey! Great party. Love the 'shrooms," Gill said. 

"Thanks, Gill," Rory said, grinning. "I don't think everyone's been officially introduced. Brian, Gill, Zack, this is Logan. Logan, this is the band."

"Nice to meet you," Logan said, shaking everyone's hand.

"These aren't… y'know…hallucinogenic, are they?" Brian asked, cautiously poking at Gill's mushroom hors d'oeuvre.

"Hey, don't touch my 'shrooms, kay? I don't want your germy hands all over them," Gill protested.

"Dude, do you _really_ think Lorelai would serve those things at a family-friendly function if they were vision-inducing?" Zack said.

"Well I don't know," Brian said defensively. "I mean, if we are keeping with the Lewis Carroll theme here, she could go for authenticity and we'd all be tripping before the tea party even starts."

"Um, I'll have to ask Sookie, but I'm pretty sure that these are non-hallucinogenic mushrooms," Rory assured them. Brian still looked worried. "In fact, I'm going to go ask her personally. Right now," she added.

"Thanks," Brian said.

Rory slipped her arm through Logan's and walked away.

"That was so uncool," she heard Zack say.

"That's quite the eclectic bunch you have there," Logan remarked.

"Honey, you ain't seen _nothin'_ yet," Rory said.

"Rory! There you are. Nice party – I'm loving the decorations," Lane said, gesturing to the birthday decorations with black permanent marker 'un-'s in front of the 'Birthday's of 'Happy Birthday.'

"Thanks. Mom's idea, naturally," Rory said. She glanced over at the front door when she heard a commotion and a voice ring out "Happy Un-Birthday, bitches!" She looked at Logan.

"No worries, I'll just go explain proper small-town protocol to Colin and the boys," he said smoothly.

"Thanks," Rory said. She watched Logan leave, and when he was a safe distance away, she pulled Lane aside.

"What?" Lane asked.

Rory dropped her arm and furtively glanced around before whispering sheepishly, "Dean saw us."

Lane looked at her blankly. "Saw us do what?"

Rory breathed out impatiently. "Not you and me us, me and Logan us."

Lane just looked at her. "So? I thought he already knew you were together."

Rory shook her head. "No, I mean _saw us_ saw us."

"Ok, I'm confused by saw us saw us."

Rory sighed. "I mean last night, Logan stayed the night and… let's just say Dean and his roomies got an eyeful."

Lane took a moment to process the information. "Ohmygod," she said. "How much did they see? And why…how…I need some dots to connect here."

"Ok, well," Rory said, wringing her hands. "My bedroom window was kind of open, and…they just saw, ok?" she said helplessly.

"But what were they doing there?" Lane asked.

"I don't know!" Rory said. "I suppose Dean wanted to talk to me… I guess he didn't know Logan was there…" she trailed off as she realized she had no idea what Dean and his friends were doing in her backyard.

"Well you didn't invite them today, right?" Lane said.

"No. I mean, Mom could have, but I seriously doubt she would willingly invite that kind of drama. Drama is something I could gladly live without for at least one day," Rory said.

"Well, the only dramatic thing that can possibly happen today is Kirk breakdancing. Or Sookie catching herself on fire. Or Miss Patty doing her USO routine… on second thought, we should get back out there," Lane said.

Rory cracked a smile. "I'm with you, sister!"

"Meanwhile, whatever happened to…you know," Lane said, pointing secretively to Rory's left hand.

"Oh!" Rory said, instantly understanding. "Here," she said, pulling out the necklace from underneath her shirt. Lane giggled at the diamond ring set. "Shh!" Rory said, shushing her. She slipped the necklace back underneath her shirt.

"That is soo cute," Lane said. "I mean, it's so great that you're still wearing it, and, well, it's just too cute! I mean, are you guys like secretly engaged or something?"

"No!" Rory said quickly. "It's just, I dunno, it felt strange putting them in a box after last weekend, but I couldn't very well keep wearing them, because that would be all kinds of weird, so I compromised."

"What does Logan think? I mean, he knows, right?"

"Yeah, he knows. I think he likes it," Rory said. Her smile grew. "I know he likes it."

"Aw! You guys," Lane said, giving Rory a quick hug.

"Oy, who pinched my bum?" they heard Finn exclaim.

Lane and Rory looked at each other and wordlessly rushed back into the living room.

* * *

Lorelai sucked in a breath when she saw Kirk walk through the door. "Ohhh my," she said to herself. Kirk was dressed in a full bunny suit, complete with white face paint and a rubber nose/tooth mask. She cautiously went to greet him. 

"Hey, Kirk. Glad you could come," Lorelai said warmly.

Kirk surveyed the room, then returned his attention to Lorelai. "You said it was an Unbirthday Party."

"Yes, Kirk," Lorelai said.

"An Alice in Wonderland theme."

"Yes, Kirk," she repeated.

"So, if it's a themed party, that implies themed dress."

Lorelai sighed. "No one said you were required to buy a costume, Kirk."

"Oh, I didn't buy it. Mother made it for me for our high school production of Harvey."

"You still fit into a costume from high school? More importantly, there wasn't an actual physical rabbit in Harvey," Lorelai pointed out.

"There was in ours."

"There was?"

"Yes. I played him."

"You played Harvey the invisible rabbit."

"Well, Mother didn't know he was invisible at the time."

"I'm getting a headache," Lorelai said, rubbing her forehead.

"The fact still remains that no one told me I wasn't supposed to dress up."

"Fine, Kirk. Do you want to go home and change?"

"No, that's alright. Lulu said I make a very sexy rabbit. Apparently woodland creatures are a turn-on for her. I love that woman."

"Yes, well, don't we all."

"Yeah, and it's ironic when you think about it. I mean, I'm dressed like a rabbit, which turns her on, which means we'll be going at it like-"

"Yes, Kirk. No need to fill in the cliché."

"But you get what I mean."

"I get what you mean. The costume stays. I'm gonna go help Sookie in the kitchen."

"Ok. I'm going to find Lulu. We're going to do a duet of Endless Love."

Lorelai watched as Kirk joined Lulu in front of the karaoke machine. Lulu was dressed as Alice, complete with the blonde wig. Lorelai sighed and went in search of a Drink Me.

* * *

"Ok, am I hallucinating or am I seeing a breakdancing rabbit?" Colin said, squinting. The Yalies were sitting on the living room couch watching the karaoke antics. 

"Yes, and the next act is the juggling kangaroo," Logan said cheekily.

Rory playfully smacked Logan's arm as she answered Colin. "No, that's just Kirk. You've met him," Rory said matter-of-factly.

"Rory, I think I would remember meeting a breakdancing rabbit," Colin said.

"Well he wasn't a breakdancing rabbit at the time. He was just Kirk," Rory said.

"Just Kirk?" Colin queried.

"Yeah. You remember the scavenger hunt?" Rory asked.

Colin looked at her blankly.

"Think back," she said.

She still received a blank look.

"Ok, go deeper… remember? The scavenger hunt in Stars Hollow? You were Sherlock Holmes?"

"Oh yeah. I looked good," Colin said, remembering.

"_That_ he remembers," Rory said, shaking her head. She returned her attention to the karaoke machine where Miss Patty was singing "Dancing Queen."

"Hello all," Finn said, flopping down on top of everyone's lap. They let out a collective groan. "Now see, making noise like that you make a guy skittish about his weight issues."

"You don't have weight issues, Finn," Colin said. "Blood alcohol level issues, maybe, but the only weight issue you have is waiting for the next drink."

"I think he's too drunk to appreciate your homophones," Logan said.

"Quite right. Time to sing," Finn said. He got up to flip through the karaoke catalog.

"You know, Humphrey Bogart said that the problem with the world is that everybody's a few drinks behind." Robert said.

"Yeah, well, Finn's trying to make up for the world," Logan said with a grin.

Paris and Doyle approached the group.

"Paris! You came!" Rory said, pleased that Paris made the trip.

"Yes, well, Doyle and I decided it would be a good chance to try out our party anecdotes. Go on, Doyle, share a conversational morsel with us," Paris urged.

"Alright," Doyle said, a smile pasted on his face. "So two guys walk into a bar. You think one of them would have seen it!"

Doyle's expectant face was met with silence. Paris looked back and forth between Doyle and everyone else.

"Perhaps you should tell it again to those people," Paris said, pointing. "We need a representative sampling of the party population to gauge the success of the joke."

"What is this, the Aristocrats?" Colin snorted.

"I love that movie!" cried Lulu, passing by. "Everybody wants to be a cat…" she sang as she walked.

"I think you misheard, Lulu, he said-" Rory said helplessly.

"Actually, Paris, let's try another tack," Doyle interrupted. "I think a historical tidbit would be well-timed."

"Alright," Paris acquiesced. "You wanna hear one of the all-time stupidest corporate decisions?"

"Not really, but I think you're going to tell us anyway," Colin said rudely. Rory weakly kicked him.

Paris just glared but continued. "The M&M/Mars company refused to market M&Ms as E.T.'s favorite candy in the movie because they thought E.T. was an ugly alien. As a direct result of E.T., Reese's Pieces sales shot up 65."

"Interesting," Rory said. Logan looked like he was about to say something, but she cut him off before he could begin. "Hey, Paris, you wanna check out the crudités? I think they're ready for some guy talk," she said, taking Paris by the elbow and motioning with her eyes for Logan to make Doyle feel welcome. Logan gave her a 'you owe me' face, but patted the seat next to him.

"Doyle, my man, sit, and let us tell you some great party jokes," he said, a mischievous gleam in his eye.

* * *

"Oh God, it's happened," Rory said from the buffet table. 

"What?" Paris asked, sampling a mini-quiche and turning to follow Rory's eyes to the karaoke corner.

"Miss Patty. Finn. Together," Rory said. They watched the scene unfold before them.

"Thank you," said Finn, grabbing the mike, "and now your American- well, Australian-American and – love, where are you from? Los Angeles? Right. Our Australian-American Los Angeles-American American Idol… oh fuck, that's too many Americans… um… your finalists for the evening will perform a duet! Hit it!"

Everyone watched as Miss Patty and Finn began to sway to the beat.

"I've been really tryin , baby…tryin to hold back these feelings for so long. And if you feel, like I feel baby, come on, oh come on…let's get it on," they sang.

"That's not even a real duet," Paris pointed out.

Rory sighed. "Just be glad Patty didn't coerce any children into being backup dancers," she said gratefully.

"I guess; but what's up with that rabbit and blondie?" Paris asked, pointing.

Rory shook her head as Kirk and Lulu slow-danced to the karaoke, gazing soulfully into each others' eyes.

"I think I need a drink," Paris said, going off in search of a waiter.

Logan sauntered up behind Rory. "Whaddya say, Ace? Would you like to show the world how to sing?" he said, slipping his arms around her waist.

Rory grinned. "Not on your life!" she said, turning to face him and fixing his shirt.

"Aw, come on, why not?" he cajoled. "There's a wide variety of selections. For example, we could sing Cruisin', I've Had the Time of My Life, Something Stupid, A Whole New World…Hell, let's go High School Musical on this crowd. It'll be the Start of Something New."

"Hmm. How do you feel about the Sounds of Silence?" Rory said sweetly.

"Alright, alright," Logan said, giving up his teasing.

"How's it goin', kids?" Lorelai said, coming up to the couple.

"Great party, Lorelai!" Logan said with an appreciative nod.

"Thank you, thank you. But honestly, did you expect any less?" she said not-so-humbly.

"Of course not. And I gotta say, it's been pretty drama-free!" Rory added.

"That it has, kiddo," Lorelai said.

"Hey, was that the doorbell?" Rory asked, craning her ear.

"There are two more guests here for the party," Michel said snootily, walking past them.

Lorelai raised her voice enough to be heard on the other side of the door. "Well tell them to get the hell in here, and did they bring the keg?" she joked.

Mitchum and Shira Huntzberger walked into the room looking extremely displeased.

Lorelai turned around and noticed the two strangers. "Or not…I'm sorry, I meant did you bring the _peg_, you know, cuz the barbershop quartet's about to sing Peg O' My Heart and we needed Peggy Schauberflatz to stand there so they could sing to her and…" she trailed off, seeing that she wasn't making any sense. She decided to pass them off to Rory. "Ok, your turn," Lorelai said under her breath.

"Hello. I'm sorry, my mother has no manners. I'm Rory Gilmore," she said, sticking her hand out.

"I know who you are," Shira said coldly. Rory cringed and dropped her hand.

"Is this some sort of reception?" Mitchum asked tersely, surveying the room, which was rapidly becoming quieter as people blatantly watched the exchange.

"That isn't funny, Mitch," Shira huffed.

"It wasn't meant to be," Mitchum replied, a mirthless smile on his face.

"Will somebody please tell me what the hell is going on here?" Shira demanded.

"Mom, Dad, what are you guys doing here?" Logan finally said. Lorelai's eyes snapped back and forth between Logan's parents and the kids.

"I'll tell you what," Shira said. "James Tarrington, Lisa and Harold's son, saw you and your friends at the pub laughing and talking, and he said that…girl….was draped all over you like a two bit floozy, and that is completely unacceptable, and you need to get it annulled this minute!" she barked, pointing at Rory.

Everyone gasped.

"Hey, don't come in here and yell at my kid," Lorelai said protectively.

Shira continued as if no one had spoken. "Well, girl, is it true? Logan? Were you or were you not wearing wedding rings? Answer me!" she demanded.

"Dammit, son, this is serious," Mitchum added.

Logan's face was slowly turning a dangerous red. Rory, in shock, wordlessly pulled the necklace from underneath her shirt. Random whistles and murmuring flooded the room as people regarded the set of rings with interest.

Babette couldn't help herself. "Honey, did you get married?" she blurted.

Lorelai held her breath, watching Rory.

Rory slowly shook her head and finally found her voice. "No, it was a false engagement… a trick we were playing on our friends…" she said hesitantly.

"Oh thank heavens for that," Shira said, letting out a sigh of relief.

"A simple misunderstanding," Mitchum said smoothly. "Mitchum Huntzberger, it's a pleasure," he said, extending his hand to Lorelai. She looked at him like he was crazy until he casually retracted his hand.

"No, Dad, it's not a simple misunderstanding," Logan said in a steely voice. "What the hell were you thinking, barging in here like that?"

"Son, you have to understand our concern. What you do, whatever messes you get yourself into, doesn't just affect you, it affects the entire Corporation," Mitchum said easily.

"Messes? How exactly are you construing this as a mess?" Logan said in disbelief.

"Honey, she's wearing some rather important jewelry around her neck, you must be able to see why that's disturbing to us," Shira said.

"No, I don't," Logan said.

"Logan, come on, let's take this somewhere else," Rory said, gently tugging on his arm and glancing around at the guests.

"No, Rory," Logan said, standing his ground. "No, we're having it out, right here, right now. Mom, Dad, you may be able to dictate my education and my corporate future, but you will _not_ tell me who I can and can't love," he said vehemently.

Rory stared at Logan, unable to believe what he just said.

"Atta boy, tiger!" Babette cheered.

"I knew it, I told you!" Miss Patty said. "Five bucks, Andrew."

"Fine," Andrew said, paying up.

"Oh, this is absurd," Shira said, throwing her hands up in the air. "I'm going to the car."

Mitchum watched her depart. "We'll discuss this later, Logan," he said sternly. He turned on one heel and followed his wife out the door.

The color was slowly fading from Logan's face as he stood there fuming.

Lorelai looked around. "Um…so, hey, Patty, Sookie, Babette, how about a lil' Andrews Sisters, hmm?" she said, gesturing for someone to turn the karaoke music back up.

"You kids go talk in your room, but when there's a quiet moment, you got some 'splainin to do!" Lorelai said quietly, pushing Logan and Rory through her bedroom door and shutting it behind them.

* * *

"God, they had no right…I mean, bursting in like that…they just..." Logan growled, pacing back and forth across Rory's bedroom. 

"It's ok," Rory said, trying to calm him down.

"No, it's not ok. I mean, there's no justification for this kind of behavior, I don't care _who_ they are. Damnable snobbery," he said, all worked up. He finally glanced at Rory, who looked a bit shell-shocked.

"I'm sorry," he said, walking over to her and giving her a brief hug. "Don't pay any attention to them," he said, gripping her shoulder comfortingly. "I mean, insanity runs in my family. It practically gallops."

"Arsenic and Old Lace," Rory said with a grin.

Logan finally smiled and dropped his hand. "Yeah, well, I couldn't sleep one night, so I watched a lot of Turner Classic Movies."

Rory simply smiled at him, not knowing what to say about his parents… but even more shocked by his inadvertent confession.

Logan sat on the edge of Rory's bed and ran his fingers through his hair, sighing loudly.

"Screw them. Let's do it," Logan said, looking up at Rory with a determined face.

"Angry sex is never a good idea, Logan," Rory said wryly.

"No, I don't mean that," Logan said, standing up. "I mean confirm their worst fears. Let's go to Vegas, get married by an Elvis impersonator," Logan said, smirking.

Rory's eyes widened. "Logan, come on. You're not serious."

"On the contrary, Ace. I'm deadly serious," Logan said, taking Rory's hands. "Whaddya say? Let's elope. Grab the guys and head to Vegas. We could even have an impromptu theme – Guys and Dolls. Pinstripe suits for the boys, a cute little Sarah Brown missionary number for you, and the best Adelaide Steph can come up with. I'm sure she can find some last minute Hotbox girls for bridesmaids."

Rory pulled her hands back and nervously folded her arms. "Logan, come on. I know you're angry at your parents, but don't joke about something this serious."

"Who's joking?" Logan insisted. "Come on, it'll be fun."

Rory suddenly began to get angry. "Fun? _Fun?_ Logan, people don't get married for _fun_. I mean, I'm sure celebrities do it all the time, but this is real life, and in real life, people get married for love."

Logan raised his voice to match hers. "Didn't you hear me out there? I said I loved you in front of everyone!"

"Exactly, Logan!" Rory said, shouting now. "In front of _everyone_. As a bargaining chip against your parents. But you didn't tell _me_, Logan! You never told _me._"

"I love you. There, I've said it."

"God, you're not listening! You never listen!"

"I listen plenty. For example, I've been listening this whole time to see if you're going to say it back, and guess what? You haven't!"

"Well I'm sorry if I'm not saying what you want to hear, but your little declaration out there was more about you and your parents than you and me."

"What do you mean?"

"I mean that this is just another way for you to rebel against your parents, and I'm not going to be party to it."

"What are you saying, Rory?" Logan said, narrowing his eyes.

Rory sighed and looked down, lowering her voice back to a normal tone. "I don't know. It's just… when you say 'I love you'… I guess I just wanted you to say it naturally, you know, when you meant it and felt it and… I don't know," she repeated.

"Rory," Logan said, taking a tentative step forward and lifting up her chin. "I love you," he said.

Rory met his eyes and searched them for the truth. "I want to believe you," she said honestly.

"Believe me!" he said emphatically. "Come on, Ace," he said charmingly. "Whaddya say?"

Rory regarded him for a moment. "I say… that we're neglecting our guests," she said, walking backwards toward the door.

"Rory," Logan said, half-whining, half-smirking.

"Logan," she replied in a matching tone. She opened the door and walked back to the party.

"What about Vegas?" Logan said to her back.

"We'll discuss this later," Rory said, grinning in spite of herself.

Logan was unable to see her grin. "Discuss what? How much you love me?" he said jokingly, but with an undercurrent of doubt.

Rory turned around and put a hand on his cheek. "Guests, Logan. Guests," she said, briefly kissing him. He leaned in to try to make the kiss last longer, but she only flitted away.

Logan watched her mingle with the guests, trying to figure her out. Colin approached him.

"Dude, what was that all about?" Colin said.

Logan rubbed his chin. "I don't know, man. I don't know."

* * *

There you have it folks! Hope it was worth the wait. And, as always, do check out the Gilmore-isms on my profile for all the references. And I love to hear from you... your reactions, suggestions, completely random thoughts... so review please!

Next time, on **The Fortune Cookie's Always Right:** Rory attempts to explain things to Lorelai. Dean confronts Logan about what he saw that night, and Rory makes an important decision about her and Logan's future…


	17. Hold for Mr Huntzberger

**The Fortune Cookie's Always Right

* * *

**

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note: **Sorry for the wait. I had a serious writer's block. But I'm back on track – I already know how the story's going to end! (Meanwhile, for plot recaps, see the long-ass one in Chapter 14 and the brief one in Ch. 16.) As always, check the Gilmore-isms on my profile for references.

We pick up our story at the end of the night of the fateful Unbirthday Party…

* * *

CHAPTER 17: HOLD FOR MR. HUNTZBERGER

* * *

Rory and Logan walked down the front porch steps to Finn's SUV, where the Yalies were piling in. 

"You sure you don't want me to stay and help you clean up?" Logan asked Rory, pausing at the end of the driveway.

She looked through the living room window and watched as Lorelai tried to wake a sleeping Kirk who was reluctant to give up the pillow he was curled around.

"No, I think we'll be alright. Sookie's gonna clean up the kitchen and we've pretty much got the living room covered."

"Ok. Well, when she gets done with Kirk, tell your mom thanks for getting us rooms at the inn. It was really nice of her… considering…" Logan left the word hanging in the air. Considering that his parents crashed the party and created a scene, leaving the remainder of the evening awkward.

"Yeah, considering," Rory said simply.

"So… I guess I should go," Logan said carefully.

"Yeah, drive safe," Rory said, briefly kissing him and then taking a step back, hugging herself in the cold.

"Are we ok?" Logan said, gesturing to the space between them.

"Yeah…yeah… of course," Rory said. "I just have a lot of explaining to do to my mom," she said.

"Explaining about… how much you love me?" Logan said with a cheeky grin.

Rory rolled her eyes. "I think a better place to start would be 'wherethehelldidyougetthoserings and whywouldpeoplethinkyou'refalselyengagedbeforeIwouldsuspectyou'refalselyengaged,Ishouldbethefirsttoeveraccuseyouofanything'," she said wryly.

Logan paused, absorbing the Gilmore stream-of-consciousness. He waited a beat. "And then you'd get into how much you love me?"

"Go home, you idiot," she said, pushing him against the car and grinning.

Logan leaned against the car and took a deep breath. "So, you know all that stuff about… about what I said about Vegas, that was just bullshit. You know that, right?"

Logan didn't notice Rory's face fall momentarily before she put an indifferent look on it.

"Yeah, I mean, I figured that was just your rebellious heir streak rearing its ugly head," Rory said nonchalantly.

"Ok, good," he said, visibly relieved. "Cuz, you know, it's one thing to drop the three-little-word bomb, but quite another to seriously consider getting married by an Elvis impersonator," Logan said with a grin. "You know," he said, rubbing his chin thoughtfully, "that's the first time I've ever said the L-word to a girl and meant it. I'm very proud of myself."

Rory rolled her eyes. "Congratulations, Casanova. I'll be sure to throw a party in your honor."

"You do that," Logan smirked.

Rory gave him a wry smile.

"Alright, glad we cleared that up," Logan said, slipping his hands in his pockets and easing off the limo where he was leaning.

"Yep, all clear," Rory said, nodding her head. "You should probably go, everyone's waiting," she said, gesturing to the limo.

"I will as soon as I get a proper good night kiss," Logan said, sliding his arms around Rory's waist.

"So demanding," she teased as Logan's head bowed to hers.

"Ain't it always the way," Logan murmured, hovering over her lips before closing the space between them. Logan made sure it was a proper good night kiss indeed; he wasted no time in deepening the kiss, threading a hand through her hair and coaxing open her lips. Rory yielded to the kiss, opening her mouth and allowing his tongue entrance, pushing all hesitations and doubts out of her mind. She kissed him back with equal ferocity and passion, causing Logan to moan when she stood on tiptoes to battle for control.

"Oy, are you two gonna make out all night long? The door's open and we're freezing!" Finn whined. "I bet Robert's car has already got there, and we'll be left with the crap rooms!"

Stephanie giggled. "Yeah, as anxious as we all are for the Huntzberger heir to procreate, we're not too keen on first-hand observation."

"Come on now, let's not be too hasty. I don't know about you guys, but I'm enjoying the free show. Skinemax has nothing on these two. Bomb-chic-a-bow-wow!" sang Colin in a poor imitation of porn music.

Rory flushed as Logan slowly lowered her so her feet were once again flat on the ground. They pulled apart, still staring into each other's eyes.

"Buzzkill," Logan directed at his friends, never taking his eyes off of Rory. He winked, and Rory wondered just what exactly it was about Logan's winks that was so damn sexy. She had a brief flash of all the other girls Logan had probably said 'I love you' to when he slept with them. She shoved the thought out of her mind.

"Later, Ace," he said, planting one last kiss on her lips. He turned around and let Finn toss him the keys as he slid in the driver's seat.

"Come on, Loverboy. There will be other times for your sexcapades," Finn said. "Goodnight, love! Fabulous party!" Finn called out the window as they drove away.

Rory waved goodbye until the car turned the corner, then sighed and trudged inside to face the Inquisition.

* * *

"So, quite the little soiree, hm?" Lorelai said, tossing some paper cups into a trash bag. 

"You can say that again," Rory said nervously, following Lorelai around the room and picking up paper plates to add to her trash bag. "Where's Kirk?" she asked.

"Oh, he went out the back door… I guess you didn't see him. He was having another one of his nightmares. When I woke him up he shouted, 'I want the purple carrots' and then '_on_ with their heads… on, dammit!'"

"Oh," Rory said, as if it were nothing out of the ordinary.

Lorelai wasted no time in getting right down to it. "So… wanna tell Mommy a goodnight story?"

Rory sighed. "Ok, well, I mean, it's not really that big of a deal."

Lorelai raised her eyebrows.

"So… Logan and I took that trip to Paris, right?"

"Right," Lorelai said slowly.

"Ok, well, um, so we were having a really fun day, but it started to get late and I was all jet-laggy, and Logan said there's this great hotel that he loves to stay at when he's in Paris. The thing about this hotel was, apparently he only stayed there with family or friends or something, because it's a family-owned hotel and the proprietors do not give out rooms to the unwed."

"Their prerogative," Lorelai allowed.

"Yeah, I suppose so. So… um… it'd look pretty fishy if we registered at the front desk as Mr. and Mrs. John Doe sans any proof, right? Kinda sleazy in a high class way. So this whole conversation about the hotel happened in a department store, or maybe in the cab, I don't remember, but anyway I went to go get some pajamas and a toothbrush while Logan went to the men's department to get his stuff, and when we met back up, he had bought this set of a diamond engagement ring and two wedding bands to make us look more convincing."

Rory took a deep breath while Lorelai let it all sink in.

"So anyway, it started out as a thing so we could stay at this amazing hotel, but it turned into a running joke, and since it was awkward trying to give them back to Logan – I mean, it's not like he could really return them – I put mine on a chain and converted them into a necklace."

"Ok… I think I understand," Lorelai said slowly. "No, I take that back. I don't understand. So you have these souvenir rings that you're keeping for…sentimental value?" Lorelai paused long enough for Rory to nod in agreement. "Alright, so you have frosting… what did Logan do with his?"

Rory grinned at her mom making the exact same reference that she had used with Logan. "He put it in a safe or something."

"A lockbox?" Lorelai said, a gleam in her eye.

Rory rolled her eyes at the way ancient reference. "Yeah, lockbox."

"Alright." Lorelai set her garbage bag down and sat down on the now-clean couch. "So what was with the interrogation?"

Rory winced and sat down next to Lorelai. "Well, we brought the rings out of retirement for one night to play a trick on Colin and Steph and Finn at the pub. We got them pretty good and then just had a normal rest of the evening. I had no idea that a son of a son of-"

"A sailor?" Lorelai offered. Rory glared at her. "I'm sorry, was that not an insert-Jimmy-Buffett-reference-here moment?"

Rory sighed. "Yes, well done, Mother. Like I said, we had no idea that anybody else saw. I can't imagine what would have happened had it gone any further."

"What, like, what if the papers found out?" Lorelai said, raising an eyebrow. "Oh my God, Paris Hilton would be soooo mad at you for taking her front page spot."

"I doubt it would make it above the fold… hey, you're mocking me," Rory pouted.

"Sorry, hun. It's just… the whole thing seems so blown out of proportion. Although, I gotta say, I'm having a hard time psychologically deconstructing Logan's thinking here."

"What do you mean?" Rory asked.

"Well, what exactly made him buy those rings in the first place? I mean, granted, it was for his so-called favorite hotel, but there are a million other places to stay in Paris. And Mr. American Express Black could afford any one of them."

"Yeah, I guess."

"And," Lorelai continued, "don't take this the wrong way, but he has such a history of being an anti-commitment kind of guy that even a pretense of marriage seems like enough to make him freak the hell out."

"Yeah, about that…" Rory said, looking down at her hands.

"What?" Lorelai asked, part concerned and part freaking out herself.

"He said he loves me," Rory said unhappily.

Lorelai looked at her. "Ok, um, correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't that a good thing? Or did he say it in the heat of passion, in a moment of weakness, in-"

Rory held up her hand. "Please don't continue that thought." Lorelai promptly shut her mouth. "He said it after that big argument with his parents, and I'm pretty sure he was serious." She decided to leave out the part about his impulsive proposal and later retraction.

"Well he did seem rather adamant about it with his parents. Hell, even I agreed with Babbette's 'atta boy.'"

"I know. It's a good thing," Rory said unconvincingly.

Lorelai looked at Rory for a moment. "Did you say it back?"

"No," Rory mumbled, looking down and playing with her hem. "But the timing wasn't right, or at least the mood, and with the party and everything… I didn't really have a chance."

Lorelai looked surprised. "Do you love him?" she asked cautiously.

"I do… well, at least I think I do. I mean, you know me, Mom. It takes longer for me to know whether or not I love someone. I knew I loved Dean when we were dating the first time, but it took a long time for me to realize it and actually say it back and it was no big deal for him. I loved Jess, or at least, I thought I loved Jess, but he was so distanced and guarded that I never knew what he thought or if he really loved me back. I mean, remember the last time I saw him, when he came to my dorm and asked me to come away with him? He said he'd changed, but how could I be sure?"

"Yeah, but that doesn't really answer the question now, does it? Logan isn't Dean or Jess. He's Logan."

Rory sighed. "Yes, he is. And that's what makes him a completely different type from either Dean or Jess. Dean was the good boyfriend, the normal guy… well, at least he used to be. Jess was the bad boy with issues, and he was exciting to be with despite the angst. But Logan… Logan's this rich playboy who's never had a serious girlfriend because he's never wanted one. He's never needed one, come to think of it. Girls just throw themselves at him and he can basically have his pick of anyone he wants."

"Well doesn't that make it more special that he wants you?"

"I guess. But there's so many levels… on the one hand, I get the impression that he always knew that his parents wouldn't think I was suitable, and it was another way of rebelling, just like going out and partying with his friends and sinking yachts and having to be rescued from foreign jail cells."

Lorelai raised her eyebrows at the foreign jail cells bit, but kept her silence.

"And the other thing is that Logan likes to try new things. It's what makes him Logan… always on the chase, always searching for one more thrill, ascending new heights… and then jumping from them. What I'm really afraid of is that I'm just a novelty, and soon I'll wear off. I mean, when you think about it, we haven't really known each other that long. All of this seems new and exciting to Logan, but what happens when he gets bored? I just don't know if I'm ready to invest that much emotion in someone who has such a short attention span."

"I don't know what to tell ya, kid. I think you're just gonna have to go with your gut feeling on this one."

"I know. I mean, I'm sure he thinks he loves me, or he loves me like he loves his car, but I have a hard time believing he even knows what love is."

Lorelai frowned. "Well, there's only one thing that's going to solve this mystery." She got up and scurried out of the room, banging around in the hallway.

"What's that?" Rory called out to her.

"Aha!" Lorelai said, walking back into the room with a Magic 8 Ball. "What does 8 say?"

"Seriously?" Rory said, shaking her head.

"Seriously, come on, give it a try. Many a decision has been made based on what the all-knowing Magic 8 Ball says. Shall I wear the shirt with the rhinestone penis? Do I want to buy that Kenny G album? Should I marry Max?"

"Mom! Please tell me you didn't really ask it the last one," Rory said in horror.

"No, but I bet it would have pointed me in the right direction if I had asked it." Lorelai held it out and Rory took it.

Rory looked at the Magic 8 Ball dubiously. "What did it say about Kenny G?"

"It said 'outlook not so good.' See, I told you it worked."

"Hmm," Rory said, shaking the Magic 8 Ball and closing her eyes. "What about the rhinestone penis?" she asked, peeking at Lorelai with one eye.

"'Without a doubt'," Lorelai said, grinning and going into the kitchen.

Rory squeezed her eyes shut and formed her question in her mind: _Does Logan love me?_

She opened her eyes and read the Magic 8 Ball: 'Cannot predict now.'

"Stupid ball," Rory said, forcefully setting it down on the coffee table and sighing.

* * *

"Ohhhh… where am I? And where are the drugs?" Colin groaned. 

"Go back to sleep, man," Logan said, sitting on a chair and putting his shoes on.

Colin sat up and looked around the room. "Seriously, dude, where am I?"

Logan grinned and shook his head. "Remember? The party? Rory's mom got us rooms at her inn so we wouldn't have to drive back to New Haven."

"Oh, right," Colin said, scratching his head. He yawned loudly. "All I remember was a breakdancing rabbit and your parents yelling." He flopped back down on his bed.

Logan's smiled faded away. "Yeah, well, you're right on both counts. The breakdancing rabbit was yet another example of the colorful characters from Rory's hometown. The yelling parents were a result of our practical joke that night at the pub."

"Huh? But they weren't there," Colin said, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Yeah, but some friend of the family told on us and Mom and Dad thought it was for real. Though I really don't see what the big deal was."

Colin looked at him incredulously. "Are you kidding, man? The big deal is that you, former playboy who never took relationships seriously, all of a sudden decided to up and turn yourself into a one-woman man. It's throwing our whole universe off balance."

"I guess so," Logan said.

"I know so. And as much as I like Rory, your former flocks of attractive girls used to come with flocks of attractive friends for me," Colin said pointedly.

Logan grinned again. "Sorry to disappoint, man. Maybe you better try getting women on your own."

"Ouch! That was a low blow, Huntzberger. A really low blow. But I'm gonna let that one pass," Colin said.

"Why's that?" Logan smirked.

"Because in order to kick your ass I'd have to get out of bed, and that's something I'm not prepared to do right now." He rolled over and promptly began snoring again.

Logan chuckled to himself and decided to go downstairs for breakfast.

* * *

"Steph, you're up! I'm surprised," Logan said, sitting down across from her at a table. She was still groggy and clutching a cup of coffee as though it were the elixir of life. Logan signaled to the waiter who brought him a menu. 

"Yeah, well, so am I. Can someone tell me how I ended up in a room with Finn? The boy snores, Logan. And I'm not talking baby snores. I'm talking diesel engines here," Stephanie complained.

"Hey, don't look at me. I recall you and Finn wanting to finish a re-enactment of… let's see, what was it now… Last Tango in Paris?" Logan said innocently. "I'll have the omelet and a cup of coffee, thanks," he said to the waiter.

"Oh God. You better be kidding," Stephanie said in mortification.

Logan laughed. "Don't worry, I am. I think you were actually re-enacting Pirates of the Caribbean. Finn was both Jack Sparrow and Will Turner and you got to be Elizabeth and… um… Davy Jones, I think."

"Great," Stephanie said, rolling her eyes. "I hope I didn't sleep with him," she said, casually sipping her coffee.

"Would it be the first time?" Logan smirked.

"Whoa, personal question! Time to refocus on… you," she said, an evil gleam in her eye.

"Oh, payback's gonna be a bitch, isn't it?" Logan said, grinning.

"Most definitely. So, you and Rory seemed awful snuggly last night," Stephanie began.

"And that's unusual because?"

"Well, considering the encounter with the parental units, I sensed some drastic damage control needed to take place, and I was just surprised that you guys recovered so quickly."

"Well, we had a little talk afterwards," Logan said evasively.

"And?" Stephanie prompted.

"And I proceeded to freak out some more," he admitted, "but everything's ok now." The waiter set down a mug of coffee. "Thanks," he said, taking a sip.

Stephanie narrowed her eyes. "Why do I sense there's something you're not telling me?"

"Must be your feminine intuition," Logan said casually.

Steph just looked at him. "Look, I'm too hung over to nag, so why don't you just tell me what really happened and then I can go back to not caring."

Logan sighed. "Well, I might have told her I loved her… and then proposed…" he said in a small voice.

"What?" she screeched. She grabbed her head. "Oh man, that hurt. Ok, so back up here. Logan Huntzberger, notorious billionaire and playboy extraordinaire said 'I love you' to a girl? On purpose?"

"Well, it seemed like a good idea at the time," Logan said defensively.

"Fine fine fine, we'll get back to that part later. But proposed? I know for a fact that you did not have enough to drink to impair your judgment enough to make such a wild suggestion. I know your breaking point, and you were at least five or six drinks away from it."

"It was just a reaction to my parents. They pissed me off, you know? I mean, the one area of my life that they have never been able to control, they now decide that they can take that over as well? I don't think so," Logan said heatedly.

"Ok, so let me get this straight: you proposed marriage as a knee-jerk reaction to your overbearing parents? Come on, Logan."

"Well…" Logan said, searching for an excuse. "I dunno. It just slipped out. I mean, it wasn't a down-on-one-knee how-do-I-love-thee-let-me-count-the-ways kind of proposal."

"Well what kind was it?"

"More like a 'hey, screw my parents, let's elope in Vegas,'" Logan said sheepishly.

"Honestly, Huntz. That's sad, even for you," Stephanie said admonishingly.

"Well what can I say. It was a monumental slip. But don't worry, she didn't take me seriously. Plus, I took it back right before we left."

Stephanie gave him a 'yeah, right' look. "She didn't take you seriously? Honey, I know you think we all approach life with the same devil-may-care attitude, but Rory's different. She probably thought you were being serious."

"No way," Logan scoffed. He paused. "Really?"

"Um, yeah!" Stephanie asserted, sipping her coffee. "I can't believe you took it back," she said to herself, shaking her head.

"Well I didn't want things to get weird between us," Logan said.

"Oh, sure. I'm sure you did the right thing," Stephanie said, smirking. "I'm sure things aren't going to be weird at all, now."

Logan gave her a look but didn't say anything. He just drank his coffee, wondering what would happen next.

* * *

"What's so great about Superman?" Lorelai said randomly. She and Rory were spending the day shopping, putting real life on hold for a moment. 

"You mean other than the fact that he's super?" Rory said, flipping through some dresses.

"Yeah, I mean, here's a guy who has a bunch of powers like x-ray vision or flying or repelling bullets, but he decides to run around with his underwear on the outside. He should spend some quality time on a couch."

"Hm," Rory said noncommittally. "How about this one?" she asked, holding up a tea-length grey dress.

"Very Friday night dinner," Lorelai said. Rory made a face and put it back.

"I think it's time for a lunch break," Rory declared.

"Excellent idea, offspring. Luke's or Al's?"

"Um, Luke's, I think. Today is Moroccan Tribute to Casablanca Day at Al's, and I think last time his couscous gave me diarrhea."

"Ok, too much information, CIA-Leaker-Guy."

"Sorry," Rory offered. "Luke's?"

"Luke's," Lorelai confirmed. They linked arms and exited the store.

* * *

"Ok, I'm going to shower. That is, if Finn's not in there," Stephanie said, slowly ascending the stairs. 

"Like that would stop you?" Logan said, humor evident in his voice.

"Watch it, Huntz," she said, not bothering to turn around as she continued climbing. "I know too many of your dirty little secrets. You just wait."

Logan chuckled and then turned around, letting her have the last word for once. He immediately bumped into someone. "Sorry," he said automatically. He stepped back and noticed who it was.

"What are you doing here?" Dean said snidely. He had his toolbelt on and was obviously doing some sort of maintenance on Tom's behalf.

"Lorelai put us up for the night… not that I owe you any kind of explanation," Logan said, comfortably slipping his hands into his pockets.

"You know, I'm getting sick and tired of your smug ass, Richie Rich," Dean said.

"Why, I'm offended. My ass isn't smug at all," Logan said cockily, leaning against a column.

Dean took a threatening step forward and then stopped himself. "You're not good for her, you know," he said, remembering that night when his virginal Rory was engaging in… relations with this jerk.

"I don't think you're in any position to make that judgment. As I recall, you and Rory broke up," Logan said easily, though his eyes were intense, betraying his barely restrained ire.

"As did you," Dean pointed out. "And the worst part about this is that you're just using her, you're turning her into this person that she would never have been if you hadn't come along. You're gonna break her heart, and you probably don't even care," he said vehemently.

"No I'm not," Logan said, allowing the steel to creep into his voice.

"Oh no?" he sneered. "Didn't you bail the last time things got a little difficult? What if they get more difficult? What if Rory gets pregnant, did you think of that?"

"Not really, but whatever happens I'll handle it," Logan said, clearly not having thought of that, though he wasn't going to let Dean know it.

"God, I can't believe you're being so irresponsible about her," Dean said incredulously.

"Listen, buddy, you don't know the first thing about me. I care about her," Logan said angrily.

"Oh, sure. You care about her so much you're just using her for sex. What happens when you get tired of her, huh? Rory's not the kind of girl who just settles for casual sex."

"You're right, she's not," Logan said, his words full of meaning.

Dean wasn't sure what to say back. Did this guy really think that Rory was in love with him? More importantly… was she?

"Ever consider the possibility that maybe I love her?" Logan said.

"Please," Dean scoffed. "Like you'd even know how. You know, buying her fancy things is not the way to Rory's heart. You just don't get it, do you?" Dean said, shaking his head. "I heard about that whole ring thing."

Logan raised his eyebrows. Word sure travels fast in this town. Not even twelve hours.

"You don't think that messes with her head?" Dean said. "Leave her alone."

"Why should I?" Logan said, crossing his arms.

"Because if you break her heart, it won't be just me who you'll have to deal with," Dean said.

"Oh, what's that supposed to mean?" Logan sneered.

"It means that the whole town is watching you, buddy. So I'd watch my step if I were you," Dean said, satisfied.

Logan raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, I'll remember that," he said, clearly not taking Dean seriously.

Dean just regarded him. "You do that," he said, backing off and walking away.

Logan released a breath that he didn't realize he was holding. All this drama… was it really worth it?

* * *

"Rory!" Lane said excitedly, scurrying around the counter to jump on Rory the second she walked into Luke's. 

"Wow, Lane, hi," Rory said, awkwardly hugging her back. "Um, I know it's been a whole twelve hours since you've seen me, but can you maybe let me breathe here?"

"Sorry," Lane said, releasing Rory and practically bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Seriously, what's up?" Rory said, intrigued.

"This!" Lane said, holding up her left hand. A very punk-rock flavored ring was on the all-important finger.

"What? Oh my God, Lane!" Rory said excitedly. "What happened?"

"Well," Lane said, eagerly leading Rory to a table. "After the party, we went home, and Zack was pacing around the kitchen. I figured he was just making a mental grocery list, you know? Because he likes to pace."

"Ok, so there was pacing," Rory prodded.

"Yes. So he was pacing and I said that I was going to the market tomorrow, and did he have any special requests, because I know he has his favorite brand of dishwashing liquid. And he said 'marry me'!"

"That was his special request?"

"Yes!" cried Lane. "He said that seeing Logan get all defensive about his parents not dictating who he will love was very rock'n'roll, and it made him think about who he loved – which was me! – and it would rock if we got married."

"Oh my gosh," Rory said.

"I know! So he gave me his favorite ring. He promised diamonds, but I wouldn't trade it for the world," Lane said, looking down lovingly at her hand.

Rory started tearing up. "Oh, Lane. I'm so happy for you!" she gave Lane a hug.

"Thanks. I'm pretty happy myself. Hey, and who knows, maybe Logan will do the same someday. I mean, you already know he loves you. I bet his proposal would be more romantic, though," Lane said, completely ignorant of the remainder of last night's proceedings.

"Yeah," Rory said quietly, remembering Logan's crazy proposal and hasty retraction. She tried to clear her head and focus on Lane. "I don't know, though, that was pretty romantic. And very rock'n'roll. The band will be pleased," she said, smiling through the tears that threatened to fall.

"I think so too. Ok, well, I better get back to work. Luke's annoyed enough with me; I can't stop humming," Lane said with a wide smile.

"Ok, I'll see you later," Rory said.

"You don't have to go! Stay, have lunch," Lane said.

"No, really, I just remembered I have to be somewhere. Um, tell my mom when she gets here from the video store that I had to go, ok?" Rory said, trying to leave before she actually started to cry.

"Ok, see ya!" Lane said, bouncing back into the kitchen.

Rory exited the diner as swiftly as possible and leaned against the wall of the building, trying to keep her emotions in check. It just wasn't fair; Logan makes some sweeping declaration of love that's more about rebellion than it is about her, and it inspires Zack to make a heartfelt proposal. And she knew Zack meant it; for all his doofiness, he really loved Lane, and Lane really loved him back, and they were going to be happy together. It wasn't that she wanted to marry Logan… she had only known the boy a short while, but somehow it seemed cruel that Logan's actions inspired others while having negative repercussions on their own relationship.

She was brought out of her reverie by the insistent sound of her cell phone ringing.

"Hello?" she answered.

"_Is this Miss Rory Gilmore?"_ the nasal voice on the other end asked.

Rory sniffed and wiped her eyes. "Yes, this is she."

"_Hold for Mr. Huntzberger,"_ the voice said.

Rory was confused. Why would Logan have a secretary? Unless…

"_Rory! Hello, Mitchum Huntzberger here."_

"Oh… um… hello, Mr. Huntzberger," Rory said, clearly confused.

"_Listen, Rory, I feel just dreadful about the way things went down last night, and I was wondering if you could stop by my office on Monday for a chat."_

"Oh, I don't know, I have class, and-"

"_Excellent. I'll just put you back on with my secretary and she can work with your schedule. See you Monday."_

Rory made the appointment with his secretary and hung up, dumbfounded. What in the world did he want to talk about?

* * *

"Mr. Huntzberger, I have a Rory Gilmore here to see you," buzzed his secretary. 

"_Thank you, Sandy."_

"Mr. Huntzberger will see you now," she said to Rory.

"Thanks," Rory said. Suddenly, his door opened.

"Rory, come in, come in. Sandy, hold my calls please."

Rory followed him into his office. He sat down behind his desk and gestured to one of the chairs in front of it.

"Please, sit down, Rory," he said.

Rory sat down without a word.

"Now, I'm sure you're wondering why I asked you to come here."

"Well, to be honest, I am rather curious," Rory said.

"I just want you to understand that Saturday night was nothing personal, it wasn't about you."

Rory raised her eyebrows.

"I know my wife can get…" Mitchum searched for the right word. "Intense, sometimes. I apologize for any embarrassment we might have caused you or your family. But you need to see things from our point of view."

"I'm listening," Rory allowed.

"Logan is and has always been being groomed to take over this company. It is his future, and he knows it and accepts it. That is not opinion or an option, it is a fact. And as much as we may seem disappointed in him at times, I personally feel that he has the brains and the ingenuity to run this corporation someday."

Rory nodded slowly.

"Now, we have allowed extra room for growing pains. I realize that this is college, and Logan and his friends have pulled some pretty spectacular stunts over the years. Personally, I can't complain too much. I myself had some pretty wild times in college," he said with a knowing wink. "But in the end, I knew what my duty was, and so does Logan."

Rory nodded again, not sure where he was going with this.

"And now this brings us to you."

Rory shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"I've heard that you have journalistic ambitions," he said kindly.

"Yes, I do," Rory said defiantly.

"Excellent. I admire any young person who wants to join our illustrious profession," he said with a smile. "However, there's something you must know. If things with Logan get serious, which may or may not happen, I don't pretend to know what's going on in my son's personal life, but if they continue down this path, I think you ought to be aware of the sacrifice you'll need to make."

"Sacrifice?"

"Yes. When the time comes, if you're ready to give up your journalistic aspirations to be with Logan, that's your prerogative."

"But-"

"Hear me out, Rory," Mitchum said, putting up a hand to quiet her. "Logan has a certain lifestyle that he will need to maintain. None of us choose it, necessarily. It's just the way the business works. And a part of that lifestyle is a supportive wife. This may sound too Donna Reed to you, but if you were to marry Logan someday, your role would be a supporting one. You would not be able to go off and cover the Middle East for CNN because you'd already be busy hosting networking functions and logging time on charity boards."

"I don't think-" Rory began to protest.

"Look, this is not a put down, and it's not a sexist thing, it's just the way things work. Now I have heard nothing but lovely things about you from your family, and I'm sure that you and Logan would be great together. You just need to know that realistically, this is the kind of life you would need to lead. Being a society wife is not all that bad, or so I've heard. Your grandmother, for instance, is a lovely example of a well-respected woman who supports her husband while living a very full life herself."

Rory inwardly flinched at the comparison to her grandmother. Thank God Lorelai wasn't here to see this.

"All I wanted to do was paint a realistic picture of Logan's future so you know whether or not you're willing to accept a place in it. It's your decision, Rory." Mitchum sat back and let Rory absorb all that he said.

* * *

Rory sat at her desk in her dorm room, thinking about her meeting with Logan's father. Maybe this was all too much for a college romance. She was far too young to be seriously thinking about marriage. And what about Logan? His father seemed to have more confidence in him than Logan ever let on, but maybe Logan didn't know that he was actually respected. Rory sighed. Logan. That was what it all came down to. Logan wasn't ready to grow up. He knew what he had to do, but to him, it was a far-off someday, not a matter of semesters or months. 

A knock on the door startled her.

"Come in," she said.

"Hey, Ace," Logan said, opening the door and stepping inside. "Paris let me in."

"Oh, I didn't know she was home," Rory said distractedly.

"Yup. So, how was your day, honey?" Logan said with a smirk, stretching out on her bed.

"Interesting," Rory said, turning sideways on her desk chair.

"What, did you learn something fascinating in Cameron's class? Let's see, perhaps you discovered the political secret behind France's ineffectual world domination efforts."

"No," Rory said, allowing a small smile. "Actually, the interesting part of my day didn't come in European Politics. It came after class."

"Ooh, something I should be jealous about?" Logan teased.

"Well it depends. Do you consider your father a serious contender for my affections?"

"My father?" Logan said, sitting up.

"Yeah. He had his secretary set up a meeting for us to discuss our future."

"Whose future?" Logan asked.

"Yours and mine, not mine and his," Rory said dryly. "Apparently I need to choose between becoming Christiane Amanpour and your trophy wife."

"What?" Logan said, getting angry.

"Chill, Logan. He just wanted to apologize for the party."

"Yeah, but this is so like him, to butt in where he's not wanted," Logan said, standing up and pacing.

"It was actually very informative," Rory said.

"Informative? Jesus, Rory. He's already telling you what committees to join and we aren't even getting married," Logan said, running a hand through his hair.

"Yes, a fact which you have made abundantly clear, ok?" Rory said, hurt.

"What does that mean?" Logan demanded.

"Nothing, it means nothing," Rory said dejectedly.

"What? Oh come on, Ace. Don't give me that. I don't need that kind of attitude from you too," Logan said pointedly.

"Fine, how about I don't give you anything at all," Rory said with an air of finality.

"What are you talking about?" Logan asked, still pacing.

"I'm talking about stepping back, giving you your space to do whatever the hell it is that you really want to do. Your family gives you enough crap as it is, so I'll just take myself out of the picture," Rory said matter-of-factly.

"Ace, come on, that isn't funny," Logan said, stopping and looking at her.

"It's not meant to be funny. I'm completely serious. Look, we had our fun, let's just end it before things get too… get too…"

"Get too what, Rory?" Logan said dangerously. "I love you, Rory, I told you that."

"Yeah, well, you say you love me but you don't mean it so I think we should stop seeing each other before it gets out of hand."

"Before?" Logan said incredulously.

"Yes." Rory wrung her hands. "Look, I don't want to be around long enough for you to really hurt me, because I'm already falling for you and I can't stand the possibility of getting my heart broken."

Logan's heart warmed at her admission but quickly turned to the matter at hand. "How do you know that would happen? Come on, Ace. Live a little. Just take a risk for once," he said, grabbing her hands and pulling her up from her chair.

"No, Logan," Rory said, shaking off his hands and folding hers across her chest. "You're the risk taker. I play it safe. You're a Lamborghini and I'm a Volvo. Your idea of a thrill is to go skydiving while mine is to find an original signed edition of The Fountainhead. We're too different, and this is never going to work. Your parents are right; I'm not the right girl for you. I'm not a cheap fling sort of girl, but I'm not going to be a society wife, either. So the way I see it, we're getting in too deep to be just having fun, and if we're not going to get married in the end, then it's just not worth it to continue. Now I know you may have random excuses but can you really prove me wrong?"

Logan didn't know what to say. He was silent as Rory's heart broke.

"I didn't think so," she finished sadly. "Here," she said, taking the ring necklace from around her neck. "I think you should have these back… it wouldn't be right, considering…" she choked up. "Just take them."

"Rory," he said helplessly, folding his hand over the necklace.

"No," she held up her hand. "Don't, just… I'll see you in class, ok, Logan? Goodbye," Rory said, grabbing her purse and rushing out of her room. Logan sat down, dumbfounded. Did they really just break up?

* * *

Dun dun dun! Well folks, it's been a wild ride, but all good things must come to an end. The next chapter will be the last. (That is, unless I'm crazy enough to do a sequel.) Will Rory and Logan go their separate ways? **Next time on "The Fortune Cookie's Always Right": **Logan and Rory deal with their breakup and come to some startling conclusions. One of them makes an attempt at a reunion... with help from the last person they'd ever think of...  



	18. Keg! Logan!

CHAPTER 18: KEG! LOGAN!

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination. 

**Author's Note:** I got all kinds of offers/threats to induce me to update. I think my favorite would have to be Camilla, who so kindly offered to take me on a tour of London if I would only post chapter 18. She wins for best timing, cuz I just happened to finish the story the day before she reviewed. So lucky her! (Well, maybe not so lucky. I might show up on her doorstep expecting room and board for an undetermined amount of time. Just kidding. Sorta.) Enjoy!

* * *

Rory looked around the pub, sipping her drink and hoping none of her friends saw her. 

It had been months since she broke up with Logan, and she insisted that she was fine by herself. Paris would hear none of it and told her she needed a good rebound guy, because before you know it it would be summer and she would slink back to Stars Hollow where the only guy remotely her age was Kirk… and just how old _was_ Kirk, anyway?

Rory couldn't believe she let Paris talk her into yet another blind date with one of Doyle's friends. At first, the idea didn't seem so bad. Doyle was smart; surely he would have at least one dateable friend. Unfortunately, all of Doyle's buddies were hopeless. None of them had made it to a second date, and it looked like she'd have to disappoint the latest catch.

"And then the horse says, 'hay'!" he chuckled, shaking his head and appreciating his own joke.

Rory just looked at him and blinked. She realized the joke was over. "Oh, I'm sorry, he said 'hay,' like 'hey'… I get it. Funny," she said, giving him a smile that held no warmth. O-k, time to go. "Well, Neil, I enjoyed this drink, really, but unfortunately I have to go to a weekly dinner with my grandparents," Rory said, politely excusing herself.

"Right, right, Doyle mentioned something about your 'Friday night dinners,'" he said, using unnecessary air quotes.

Rory looked at him, confused. Was he trying to make something suggestive out of dinner at Grandma's?

"Yeah…um… so thanks, it's been… interesting," Rory said graciously, standing up to go.

Neil stood up as well. "My pleasure. Maybe we could do it again sometime."

No way in hell. "Perhaps. See ya," Rory waved and then navigated the crowd to the pub door.

She opened the door only to bump into a group of people coming in. "Sorry," she mumbled, looking up. Her face fell when she saw it was Logan… with a girl. She looked vaguely familiar, but Rory didn't exactly want to take the time to find out.

"It's ok, it was my fault…" But before Logan could finish his thought, Rory scurried past him. He sighed and led the girl in.

"What was that all about?" she asked as they sat down.

"Oh come on, Rosemary. You remember Rory," Logan said, running his fingers through his hair and ordering a beer. "Where is everyone?" he muttered to himself.

"Oh, right! Chick from New Year's Eve," she said, remembering. "Wow. But that was…what, like, five months ago?"

"It wasn't that long. We broke up right before spring break," Logan said, clearly not wanting to talk about it.

"Wow! How did I not know this? Wait- broke up? That insinuates you had an actual girlfriend!" she gushed.

"Yeah - you know, I don't really wanna talk about it," Logan said, taking a long swallow of beer.

"Sure. Hey, no problem," she said. There was a pause as she randomly drummed her fingers on the table. "You really had a girlfriend? How did I not know this?" she said, unable to resist.

"Well you've probably seen Finn, what, three or four times max this semester? And he's not exactly a gossip queen," Logan said.

"True," Rosemary said. She made no pretense; she and Finn were casual fuckbuddies, no claims on each other. Sexual scratching posts and what not. But still; the great Logan Huntzberger with an honest-to-God girlfriend! Surely word would have gotten around. Come to think of it, the line to get to him wasn't so vocal until spring break.

"So how ya holdin' up?" she asked, sympathetically patting him on the arm. Luckily, the guys chose that moment to show up.

"Perfect timing, I was just about to forsake you bastards," Logan said, false cheer in his voice.

"Sorry, Finn saw-" Colin started. Finn made a slashing motion across his throat. "I mean," he said slowly, "_I_ saw a redhead that I just _had_ to talk to in the parking lot."

"Nice save," Rosemary said dryly, "but you don't have to cover for Finnie. I know his type," she said, smiling. "Sex-crazed Aussie," she teased him.

"Who, me? Never!" Finn said dramatically. "Come on, love, let me buy you a drink," Finn said.

"Fine," she said. "You can get me another Amaretto sour. Just don't slip any roofies in it. If we have sex, I wanna remember, got it?" she teased.

"That was just the one time, and it was totally an accident. I'll see to your drink," Finn said, wandering up to the bar.

"He's kidding about that, right?" Logan said, part amused, part worried.

"God, I hope so," Colin said. "So, guess who else we saw in the parking lot?"

"Suri Cruise?" Logan offered.

"Yeah, and she was chillin' with Bigfoot and Loch Ness," Colin scoffed. "No, actually, we saw Rory Gilmore."

"I know," Logan said, playing with the droplets of water sweating down his glass.

"No way. How do you know?"

"Because I bumped into her on my way in. Literally."

"Oh," Colin said. He surveyed Logan through narrowed eyes. "You ok?" he asked, actual concern leaking into his voice.

"I don't wanna talk about it, if it's all the same to you," Logan said easily. "So how'd you do on your English exam?"

Colin knew when to leave well enough alone. "Well, it was actually Russian lit, and it kicked my ass. Never again am I going to let the promise of a hot professor affect my course choices…"

* * *

"Paris, no more Doyle's friends. Under no circumstances am I going on any more dates with guys with freaky senses of humor," Rory said, calling to Paris the minute she walked in the door. 

"Don't worry, that won't be a problem," Paris said, stamping into the common area and slamming some glue down on her craft table.

"Whoa, hey, don't take it out on Elmer," Rory said, concerned the glue would explode with the force.

"No, I mean Doyle and I broke up, so you won't have to ever see any of his dumbass friends again. For that matter, neither will I," Paris said caustically.

"Oh, Paris, I'm sorry," Rory said sympathetically.

"Yeah, well, cry me a river, I could care less," Paris said. The violence with which she was squeezing out the glue said otherwise.

"Um…is there anything I can do?" Rory asked tentatively.

Paris looked up. "Yes. Yes, you can get me a drink."

"Ok…um… we have orange juice in the fridge," Rory offered.

"No no no, my angelic Rory, I mean a _drink._ I'm talking a rum and Coke without the Coke."

"Ah," Rory said, understanding. "Well we don't have any of that here. Dry dorm, remember?"

"Fine," Paris said, throwing down the glue and getting up and going to her room. Rory watched her, curious to see what happened next. Paris emerged from her room with her purse and keys. "Come on."

"Where are you going?" Rory asked.

"You mean where are _we_ going. You think I would drive drunk, Rory? I'm upset, not stupid," Paris said.

"Ok, fine, where are _we_ going?" Rory said patiently.

"The pub," Paris declared. "My therapist is always saying I need to let loose more often. Well I'm going to squeeze a semester's worth of letting loose into one night. Let's go."

"Well… does it have to be the pub? Can't we go somewhere else? Friday's, maybe? Or the Ale House?" Rory said uneasily.

"No way, they are way too expensive. The pub is cheap. Why don't you want to go to the pub?" Paris asked.

"Well…I went there before Friday night dinner, and Logan was there with his friends. They might still be there."

"Rory, geez, get some perspective. My need for bonding and drinking overrules your discomfort level at bumping into your ex-boyfriend. Besides, you're not gonna let Mr. SexyBack dictate where you can and can not hang out, are you? He can't claim the pub as his own. That's not fair. It's common ground."

"You're right," Rory said, momentarily emboldened. "Let's go," she said decisively. "But I'm not drinking," she warned Paris.

"Fine, whatever, let's just go!" Paris said, leading the way.

* * *

"We are _so_ getting a cab," Paris said, watching Rory dance up to the bar. 

"Hello, friends," Rory slurred, plopping down on the barstool next to Paris, giggling. "I'm your Vita…meta…vega…whatsit girl. Are you tired, run down, listless? Do you pop out at parties? Are you unpoopular? The answer to all your problems is in this bittle lottle," she said, tapping her drink.

Paris wobbily leaned forward and squinted at Rory's drink. "That's not a bottle, it's a glass."

"Oh, come on, use your imagination, Paris," Rory chided. She thought for a minute, though her thoughts were very fuzzy. "Hey, Paris, did you ever wish your parents named you Normandy?"

"Norman who?" Paris said.

"What?" Rory said blankly.

"Who's Norman?" Paris asked.

"I don't know," Rory said.

"You said something about a Norman."

"Maybe that's the bartender's name." Rory sat up straighter and peered down the bar, waving her hand to catch the bartender's attention. "Excuse me, is your name Norman?"

"No, I'm Vince," he said in a voice that belayed experience with the drunk and disorderly.

"He said no, his name is Vince." Rory relayed to Paris. The bartender shook his head and went to the other end of the bar. "I bet he sucks," Rory pouted.

"Why?"

"Cuz he's a guy, and guys suck."

"No, Vince is good. He is the bringer of the magic potion that sets us free from our daily trials and tribulations," Paris said, gesturing with her half-empty drink.

"I thought he poured the shots," Rory said, not making the connection.

"That he does, Gilmore, that he does," Paris said, taking a swig.

"You know what sucks?" Rory said sadly.

"Men! Men suck!" Paris said emphatically.

"Yeah, that too. But what also sucks is irony."

"Lay it on me, sister."

"Logan said he loved me, you know," Rory said, looking down into her drink.

"No!" breathed Paris.

"Yeah. Yeah he loves me and so Zack proposed."

"Huh?"

"Zack saw Logan say he loved me and he proposed to Lane. So now Lane and Zack are getting married and Logan and I broke up. Stupid boy."

"Yeah, stupid boy," Paris agreed. "They're all so stupid and… and stupid-y, ya know? Like Doyle. We were sleeping together, right? And then I make some very minimal suggestions regarding foreplay and he gets up and says I can't take this anymore, Paris. You're so demanding, Paris. Let me do my thing, Paris. Oh he can do his thing. He can do his thing to other women, I don't care a snit."

"Yeah, you tell him."

"I mean, can't he take some constructive criticism? It never bothered him before."

Rory considered it. "Of course, it was probably never about his lovemaking before."

"True, but that shouldn't have anything to do with it."

"It shouldn't, but it does."

"Yeah."

"Boys suck."

"Yeah."

* * *

Rory woke up with a raging headache. "Ohh…I need tacos," she moaned to herself. 

"Wha?" Paris said blearily.

Rory sat up and rubbed her face, looking around the room. Apparently she and Paris just barely made it out of the cab and stumbled into the common room. Paris was sprawled out over the sofa, and Rory was left with the armchair. "Tacos," she repeated. "Hangover food."

"Who the hell eats tacos at 8 in the morning?" Paris said crankily. She sat up too. "I'm making tea."

"Coffee," Rory suggested, barely able to string together a sentence. "Coffee. And aspirin."

"Yes. Yes, coffee and aspirin," Paris agreed. She started the coffeemaker and they went to their respective bathrooms to shower and brush the fuzzy feeling off of their tongues.

Twenty minutes later, they met back up in the kitchen. "Nectar of the gods," Rory breathed, clutching her latte mug. Paris rolled her eyes.

"So, we didn't do any Coyote Ugly impressions last night, did we?" Paris asked cautiously.

Rory giggled, then held her head from the movement. "Oh, we did no such thing," she said.

"Good," Paris said.

"_You_, on the other hand," Rory said, her eyes shining with laughter, "got up on your barstool and sang 'Pour Some Sugar on Me' to the 1:30 last call crowd."

"Dear Lord," Paris said, suddenly remembering. "Oh well," she said, shrugging. "I was drunk, I had an excuse."

"Yeah," Rory agreed, knowing better than to continue teasing Paris.

"Although I'm surprised you remembered, seeing as how you were drunker than me," Paris said, turning the spotlight back on Rory.

"And here it comes," Rory said to herself.

"Here what comes? I'm just curious as to why you were drinking. I mean, usually, you're not the drinking sort of girl. There has to be something going on with you to make you get that way, and as much as I'm all for bonding and all that crap, I don't think that you were truly that upset over me and Doyle."

"I just… I just felt like it, ok, Paris?" Rory said tiredly. She didn't have the energy for an interrogation.

"I'm not buying that. As your best friend, Rory, you're obligated to tell me these things, so spill. Besides, I can't have any negative karma around me during exam week, so you have to tell me or else I'll fail my exams. You don't want me to fail my exams, do you?" Paris accused.

"No, Paris, of course not," Rory sighed. Paris looked at her expectantly. "Ok, fine, so perhaps your breakup with Doyle brought back residual feelings from my very own breakup, but I'm fine. Honestly."

"No, you're not, because you wouldn't have drunk so heavily if you were fine."

Rory downed the rest of her coffee and willed the coffeemaker to hurry up so she could have a refill. "Ok, well, maybe I'm not completely fine, but I will be."

"Well what's the problem them?" Paris asked.

Rory stared into her empty cup. "I think I still love him," she said quietly.

"What?" Paris said, unable to hear.

"I said I think I still love him," Rory said miserably.

"What do you mean, you still love him? You broke up weeks ago, Rory. The boy sent you all manner of gifts and favors, but you resisted every attempt at reconciliation. And by the way, I commend you on your dedication. But it's time to move on," Paris said practically.

"I know, Paris, I know it's time to move on, but I can't, ok?" Rory said, frustrated. "I miss him, and I can't help it. I know it's better this way, that I broke things off before I got too emotionally involved so that it wouldn't hurt when he inevitably dropped me for someone new, but the thing is…" Rory stopped. "The thing is, I guess I didn't realize how emotionally involved I already was."

"Hm." Paris thought for a moment, pacing around the kitchen.

"Could you stop that? You're making me dizzy," Rory complained, putting her face in her hands to shut out the movement.

"Sorry," Paris said, standing still. "Well, the way I see it, you've got two options."

"Oh yeah?" Rory said warily.

"Yeah. One: you can get over it and leave yourself free to meet someone more dependable."

Rory rolled her eyes. "And two?"

"Two: get him back."

* * *

"Thank God exams are over. I can put all that stress behind me now." 

"Finn, you didn't even go to two of your exams. What the hell did you have to be so stressed about?" Logan said with a grin.

"The three I actually took! See, I couldn't remember which professor I slept with, so I had to go to all three female-taught classes. I couldn't remember which one would give me the automatic A," Finn explained rationally.

"So wait a minute," Colin piped up. "You skipped the exams given by the male professors?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Well after all the trauma I went through concerning my first three, I didn't have the energy to make it to the last two," Finn said dramatically.

Logan shook his head at Finn's logic. "Well I, for one, am glad exams are over. See, _I_ didn't sleep with any of my teachers, so I actually had to _take_ them all."

"Oh please. I know for a fact that you slept with some of them," Colin jibed.

"T.A.'s don't count. Everyone knows that," Logan said, winking.

"So, are we going to the end-of-term party in Branford?" Colin asked.

"I'm sorry, did you just _ask_ if we were going to a party? Of course we're bloody going!" Finn said.

"Good. Now… who are we going _with_?" Colin asked.

"I claim Stephanie," Finn said.

"Why's that?" Colin asked.

"Because she's a doll and won't care if I go home with someone else," Finn said.

"Ah," Colin said in understanding. "Smart choice. Too bad she's the only one of our friends who's that enlightened. Whatever happened to Josie?"

"The lesbian?" Logan answered.

"Oh yeah. Maybe I'll call Amy. She's still straight, right?" Colin asked.

"Far as I know; she slept with Finn last week," Logan said with a smirk.

"Yeah, and she better be straight, otherwise I'll have one more thing to add to my already long list of therapy subjects," Finn added.

"Geez!" Colin exclaimed. "Is it really that bad? I mean, have we seriously dated all the girls from Yale? Must we steal Harvard girls from the enemy?"

"I doubt you'll have to resort to that," Logan said wryly.

"God I hope so," Colin said. His eyes lit up. "Who are you gonna take? And does she have a sister? Or a cousin, I'll take a cousin."

"Actually, I thought I'd go alone… I might make an appearance and then come back to pack."

"Pack? Pack?" Finn shrieked. "This I can not abide. Why spend the evening tossing your things into poxy little boxes when you could be doing Jell-O shots with the disenfranchised youth of America?"

"That's it," declared Colin. "Which Swedish twin did you date last year?" he asked Logan.

Logan thought back. "Elsa."

"Right. Ok, so I'll take Elsa and you take Brigetta," Colin said, settling the matter.

"How is my sleeping with Elsa any different than Finn sleeping with Amy?" Logan asked, confused.

"Because," Colin said simply, "Amy was last week, and Elsa was last year. You've both slept with enough people since then that I am sufficiently un-weirded out."

Logan shook his head. "Ok, but I'm not staying long…"

* * *

"Rory!" Marty called across the quad. 

"Hey, Marty!" Rory cried, jogging the last few steps to meet him and launching herself into his arms.

Marty blushed. "Hey, wow, it's good to see you too," he said, hugging her awkwardly and then stepping back. "You do realize that you saw me like two hours ago, right?"

"Yeah, but this time it's different," Rory explained.

"How so?" Marty asked, falling into step beside her as they walked back to her room.

"Because it's so… so final now. Today's the last day I'll be on campus. I'm taking all my stuff home tonight and I won't return until fall. It's our last day as sophomores, Marty!"

"And thank God for that," Marty said. "That means I've finally declared and get to take classes that actually relate to my major."

"Yeah, but I'm talking about another chapter of our lives being over," Rory said dramatically. "It's gonna be a whole summer before I see these hallowed halls again."

"Well you could always take summer classes," Marty joked.

Rory backtracked. "Yeah, well, maybe a few months of not-school won't kill me." She grinned with Marty. "What are your summer plans?"

"Well, the life of the underprivileged Ivy Leaguer never rests. I'm working for my dad this summer. And you?"

"I think I'm gonna play it by ear. Mom has a lot of things planned, some Stars Hollow traditions that I missed last year by running away to Europe with Grandma." Rory thought for a moment. "You know, I've spent at least part of the last two summers in Europe, which is highly unusual for a girl who for the majority of her life never traveled more than two states away. Hm. Well, anyway, as for the rest of the summer…" Rory shrugged. "Who knows?"

"Well, you know, if you don't have anything better to do," Marty said, looking at his feet as they walked, "you always have a standing invitation to come visit me." He looked up to gauge her reaction. "I mean, it will probably be boring, but you could come if you want to," he finished quickly.

"Aw, Marty, I'd love to! Maybe Mom and I could plan a road trip and you could take a few days off or something. Or maybe a weekend," Rory said.

"Yeah, yeah, that would be fun," Marty said, relieved and a little bit hopeful.

"And I assume that invitation extends to Paris too, right?" she said innocently. Marty just looked at her, not sure if she was kidding, and in case she wasn't, tried to think of a polite way to pre-un-invite Paris. His confusion was relieved when Rory laughed. "Kidding, I'm totally kidding!" she guffawed. "You should have seen the look on your face!"

"You know, I wanna believe that you would have felt the slightest bit guilty if I'd had a heart attack just then," Marty said as she unlocked her door.

"Of course I would have," Rory said. "And I would have read a very nice poem at your funeral."

"Thanks," he said dryly as he shut the door behind them.

Rory grinned. She walked in and noticed the stacks of boxes piling up outside Paris' door. "Anyone home?" she called.

Paris poked her head out of her room. "Yeah. Listen, what are you planning to do tonight?" she asked with her usual brevity.

Rory looked at Marty who shrugged. "Nothing in particular. I was planning on taking my last carload of stuff home tonight. What did you have in mind?"

"Well, the year is over, and I'm leaving tomorrow, and I thought we needed some kind of cathartic experience," Paris said.

"What did you have in mind?" Marty asked.

Paris looked at him, just now noticing he was in the room too. "Well, there's this party in Branford, I'm not sure which floor…hell, if it's a good party, it will be the entire building. Anyway, I think we should go," she finished. "You can come with us, if you want," she reluctantly tossed in Marty's direction.

"Thanks, Paris, that means the world to me," Marty said sarcastically, putting his hand over his heart. Rory rolled her eyes and pulled his hand down.

"Sure, why not? A little revelry never hurt anyone. Besides, it will be our last chance to bond with anyone who's graduating! Aw, man, I just thought about it, some of our friends are graduating!" Rory said. "Well, not friends per se, but acquaintances! Very almost-close acquaintances! A handful of people in my lit class and some friends from the paper…and that kid in my science class! Aw geez, it's gonna be so sad."

"Is she always this sentimental?" Marty asked Paris.

"Rarely. So, yes? We're going?" Paris said, tapping her foot impatiently.

"Yes, let's!" Rory exclaimed.

* * *

The trio followed the sound of a thumping bass into the first room of the party, which had already spilled out to the entire first floor. 

"You guys want a beer?" Marty asked, raising his voice to be heard over the thumping.

"Sure," Paris shouted back.

"Me too, thanks, Marty," Rory added.

"Ok, I'll be right back," he said, off in search of the keg.

Rory and Paris looked around the room, realizing that they didn't know a single soul. That is, until Rory heard an unidentifiable voice say, 'Logan, buddy, you owe me twenty bucks!'

"Oh geez, oh geez," Rory said, one paper bag shy of hyperventilating.

"What?" Paris said.

"I think he's here."

"Who's here?"

"You know who! Logan!"

"Well of course he's here. It's a party. That's what he does," Paris said dismissively.

"That's not all he does," Rory said in his defense.

Paris raised an eyebrow. "So, what, are you going to talk to him?"

"I haven't decided yet," Rory said nervously, wringing her fingers.

"Come on, Rory. We've been over this. Two options: get over him, or go get him. It's very simple."

"It's not that simple. I need to carefully weigh the pros and cons of both choices."

"Well, you better do your list-making fast, because everyone's moving out this weekend, and now might be your only shot at reconciliation," Paris said.

Rory was momentarily emboldened. "You know what? You're right!"

Paris snorted. "Of course I'm right. I'm always right."

Marty approached them, carefully balancing three drinks in his hands. "Here you go, guys."

"Thanks. Well, I'm off to mingle," Paris said, with one last challenging look at Rory. Feeling she made her point well enough, she walked away.

"Ok," Rory said in a tone that let Paris know she got it. She turned her attention to Marty. "Thanks," she said, accepting the drink. She took a sip.

"So, you see anybody you know?" Marty asked, looking around the room.

"I'm not sure yet…" she said, scanning the crowd. Her stomach jumped as she saw a cluster of people, hearing a telltale Australian accent from somewhere in the crowd.

"Um, there's a girl from my psych class that I should probably say hello to…she's graduating," Rory said quickly. "Um… hold my drink?" she asked.

"Sure," Marty said, looking at her strangely, accepting her cup.

"Ok, thanks," Rory said, flashing him a smile. She wiped her hands slowly on her jeans, not able to tell if it was water off the cup or sweat from her hands.

Rory tried to follow Finn's voice, for where Finn was, Colin surely was, and where Colin and Finn were, surely there was a Logan. Rory silently cursed the inordinate amount of tall people at this party, for they prevented her from seeing anything. Hands on hips, she stood on tiptoe, and there they were. The crowd shifted enough for her to see the group across the room. Rory summoned up her courage and took a tentative step into the throng, but stopped dead in her tracks when she saw Logan. She felt a lump forming in the pit of her stomach as she saw Logan with his arm around some perfectly tan and blonde girl, whispering something in her ear to make her laugh. Logan smirked and pulled away from her ear to take a sip of his drink, and it was then that his aimless gaze landed on Rory. She was rooted to the spot, all of a sudden forgetting how to walk. She felt the heat creep into her cheeks as Logan's eyes met hers. Only when his smile faltered did she realize that she was standing still. Rory blinked back the tears that burned in her eyes and suddenly turned to flee, bumping into Marty in her hurry to find the nearest exit.

"What's up? Are you ok?" Marty asked, concerned. He set down both drinks on the nearest surface.

"I'm fine… it was just…" Rory struggled to breathe. "It wasn't who I thought… it was someone else," she said sadly.

"Oh," Marty said, not sure what was wrong with her.

"I'm not feeling so great…can we go?" Rory said.

"Sure, no problem, come on," Marty said, frowning and putting his arm around her shoulders.

Rory sighed and threw her arm around his waist, squeezing it thankfully. "Thanks, Marty."

"It's ok. I didn't really see anybody I wanted to talk to anyway," Marty said comfortingly as they walked out the door.

* * *

"Rory," Logan said softly to himself the minute she turned around to go. 

"What?" the girl said.

Colin and Finn looked at each other.

"Uh, nothing, listen, Brigetta, if you'll excuse me for just one brief second," Logan said, releasing her from his grip and following Rory with his eyes. He didn't take more than two steps before he saw Rory was with Marty. His eyes darkened when he saw them walk out the door with their arms around each other.

Colin turned to see what Logan was looking at and he sighed in recognition. "Actually, ladies, if you would be so kind as to excuse us, we need a word." He made significant eye contact with Stephanie who rolled her eyes and led the Swedish twins to another group.

"What was that all about?" Colin asked once they left.

"And why did we have to send the birds away?" Finn complained. Colin mouthed 'Rory.' "Ah."

"I don't know, she… she was just standing there," Logan said.

"Ok, and that is significant how?" Colin said impatiently.

"We looked at each other, and it was just… I don't know," Logan said, frustratedly running a hand through his hair. "It was just a really weird moment, is all." He sighed. "And she left with Marty. That's gotta be significant, right? I mean, she always said she was a girlfriend girl. Maybe she's with him now. It just… it didn't look like they were together. She wouldn't have approached me then, right?" Logan said, looking to his friends for the answers.

Finn sized him up. "I know it's tough, mate, but you've got to let her go. She let you go, didn't she? Look, tell ya what: come home with me this summer. I've got at least a dozen women who would give their left nuts to sleep with you. I'm being figurative, naturally. Australian women don't have nuts," he said helpfully.

"That's not it! Look, guys, I've tried that, ok? Tonight is a perfect case in point. The lovely Brigetta is beautiful enough to tempt any man, but I had to force myself to go through the motions. It's just not enough anymore, and the whole thing sucks. It sucks up one side and down the other. All the easy lays in the world aren't gonna fix my problem."

"And what exactly is your problem?" Colin pressed.

"Rory," Logan said simply. "I miss her. I can't help it and I don't know what to do about it and it pisses me off. I've never missed a girl before. I've tried sending her flowers, chocolates, even had the coffee guy follow her around for a day, but nothing works."

"Ok, well there's a simple solution for that. Just try dating somebody else if the one night stands aren't living up to their former glory," Colin said.

"No, you don't understand. Just one minute with Rory is better than a year with any of the girls we know. I gotta do something to get her back."

"Hm. Well, maybe you're going about this the wrong way," Finn said.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean you've spent the whole semester doing what you think will get her back. But you need to do something to actually get her back," Finn said.

"Well thank you Captain Obvious," Logan said dryly.

Colin nodded in agreement. "Look, ask yourself this: who knows Rory best? Who would know how to get her back? Because whatever you're doing obviously isn't working. If you really want her back, then go get her… on her terms."

Logan thought for a moment, a light bulb flickering to life in his head. "Thanks, man," he said, clapping a hand on his shoulder. "You're absolutely right. Wish me luck." With that, Logan strode out of the party.

"Wait, Huntz, where you goin'? Huntz?" He called after him to no avail.

"Well, I say good luck to the crazy bastard." Finn said.

Colin turned to Finn. "You know, we need to find a Rory for ourselves."

Finn nodded sagely. "Quite. Where does one start?"

"I dunno. The paper?" Colin offered.

"Nah, too much thinking required. We might get recruited to do actual work." They shuddered. "The library?"

"I don't like the smell of the old books. Creeps me out." They both thought for a grand total of twenty seconds until Colin found a solution. "How about those Indian chicks in the corner?"

Finn followed his eyes. "Excellent idea, mate. Let's go get 'em." They shook hands and headed off to new conquests.

* * *

Oh, I'm such a bitch! You thought this was the last chapter. And it was! The first half of it! In my infinite niceness, rather than overload your senses with too much happening in one chapter, I decided to play Solomon and split this baby into two chapters. Easier on the eyes and much more plot-sensical. (And, I mean, come on. You don't want to read a file the size of three chapters, do ya? Dontcha think 25 pages is a bit much?) 

But don't freak, I've already written the next chapter. And mostly just because I can, I'm gonna update on a supply and demand system. You guys supply a significant amount of reviews showing you want – no, NEED – this update ASAP, I'll post it within three days. (Wow, this sounds like a fairy tale. Or a Disney movie. Must kiss before sunset on the third day, or Ariel turns into a sea squiggly.) But if there are no reviews, that means y'all don't care, right? So I can take my sweet time, right? (That's what I thought.) And, as always, Gilmore-isms are on my profile for your viewing pleasures. Ta ta!


	19. Let's Go

CHAPTER 19: LET'S GO

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination. 

**Author's Note**: Holy shit! That was a lot of reviews! Thanks, you guys. Reading your reviews absolutely makes my day. And not just the ones where you say how great I am, either. ;) I like hearing your Gilmore-like ramblings and opinions about the characters and their actions. Yeah, I wish I was a real Gilmore writer, because then season 6 wouldn't have sucked so bad. Come on, we all love the show, but they all acted out of character on multiple occasions. Hopefully they will get it back on track this year. Anyway, I shall miss this story, and I shall miss my dear reviewers! It's been a great ride, thanks.

And now, the final chapter…

* * *

Rory slammed her car door in the Gilmore driveway and breezed into the house, going straight into her bedroom and shutting the door, storming right past a very surprised Luke and Lorelai. 

"What the hell was that?" Luke asked, pausing mid-stir.

"I dunno, but I'm gonna find out," Lorelai said, patting his arm. "Stay in the kitchen, it smells great. I'll be back in a minute."

"Are you sure you don't want me to go?" Luke said uncomfortably. "We can do this another time," he said, gesturing to the elaborate dinner he was cooking.

"No, no, it's fine. Tell ya what; if she gets rowdy, I'll call you in and we can go all good cop/bad cop on her. I knew someday those handcuffs would come in handy," she said with a wink.

Luke groaned. "You know, you keep talking like that, and you're gonna start believing there actually are handcuffs."

"Oh, there are handcuffs alright. And they're pink. And fuzzy. And possibly leopard print."

"And entirely imaginary," Luke admonished.

"Perhaps," Lorelai allowed. "Or maybe you're just hiding them next to the edible underwear in the deep dark drawer in your apartment where you keep all things kinky."

"You've been to my apartment. You've seen my drawers." Luke held up a hand. "Please, don't go anywhere dirty with that."

Lorelai pouted. "But it was a perfect opening! I could have tied it into the edible underwear bit!"

"Don't you have a hysterical daughter to tend to?" Luke said, hoping to distract her.

"Right! But this conversation isn't over, my friend. Not by a long shot. Someday I'm gonna find that drawer, and when I do…"

"Please don't finish that sentence," Luke pleaded.

"Fine," Lorelai said, letting it go for the moment. "I'll be back."

"Fantastic," Luke muttered under his breath, returning to his stirring with a half-grin at Lorelai that belied his gruffness.

Lorelai knocked softly on Rory's door. "Sweetie?"

"Yeah?" Rory said from the other side.

"Can I come in?"

"Sure."

Lorelai slowly opened the door to find Rory sitting on her bed, staring at the now-empty French memo board leaning against her desk.

"Stupid fortune. Stupid fortune can kiss my ass," she said, her chin cupped in her hands with her elbows resting on her knees.

"Are we talking 'wheel of' or the cookie variety?" Lorelai asked, shutting the door behind her.

Rory didn't answer her, but continued to ramble. "It was stupid, it was stupid to think that months after our breakup that he'd be pining for me. I should have known better. I don't know why I'm surprised; it's exactly why I told him we should break up. Him with a different girl on his arm each night."

"So, killer party, huh?" Lorelai said dryly, noticing Rory's agitated state. "Wanna tell Mommy what happened?"

Rory flopped face down onto her pillow and mumbled into it.

"Aw, hon, I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to give me more than 'Eleven Andy Sober Me.' Little Orphan Annie couldn't decode that one."

"No," Rory whined, pulling her face out of the pillow. "I love him, and he's over me!"

"Aw, we didn't even get a chance to MadGab. Oh well. Now it makes more sense. Well… almost. What brought this on?"

"Logan! He's back to his playboy ways and I can't stand it."

"How do you know?" Lorelai said, moving to sit beside her and stroking Rory's hair.

"Because I've seen him twice in one week and he was with a different girl each time," she sniffled.

Lorelai made a mental note to hurt the boy who hurt her baby. "Well, maybe they were friends," she rationalized.

Rory snorted. "Oh please. Who's naïve now, Mom? I mean, granted, I didn't see any damning evidence, but he was most definitely flirting with the second girl. And I hate that I care, but I do."

Lorelai absorbed her words, just letting Rory vent.

Rory continued. "He's just doing exactly what I figured he'd do, and acting exactly the way I said he would, so I don't know why I'm surprised. I mean, I'm not. I'm not surprised."

"No, you're hurt," Lorelai said in a soothing tone.

Rory sat up. "But I have no right to be hurt. I mean, I broke up with him for his hypothetical behavior. How stupid can I be? I really liked him, Mom. I really really liked him.

"I know, honey," Lorelai said, smoothing her hair. "I know."

* * *

"So? What's the matter with her?" Luke said when Lorelai returned to the kitchen Rory-less. 

"Shh, she'll hear you!" Lorelai said, looking back at Rory's closed door. She moved the conversation onto the front porch.

"Sorry! But what's the matter with her? Is everything ok?" Luke repeated.

"She's just having a rough night," Lorelai said sadly, sitting on the porch steps.

"What's goin' on?" Luke said, sitting beside her.

"Well it was somewhat muddled, but from what I could tell, she saw Logan with another girl."

"That punk! I'm gonna kill him. I'm gonna march over there and kick his skinny butt, and then when I'm done kicking his butt, I'm gonna-"

"Luke, Luke, calm down!" Lorelai said, part touched that he got all worked up, part exasperated at his typical male reaction. "You're not gonna _do_ anything. They broke up, remember?"

Luke looked confused. "I don't remember that. When did that happen? And if they're broken up…then…"

Lorelai grinned. "Oh, honey. Ye of little powers of observance. They broke up a few months ago, I wanna say around March. Rory was actually the one doing the breaking up."

"Because he cheated on her?" Luke asked, ready to be angry again. "Were they really engaged? Because if so, heads will roll, starting with his, and then his dad's, and then-"

"No! Geez! Because I guess she thought they were going too fast. I think she was falling for him and was worried that she'd get all emotionally attached and he wouldn't and he would go back to being a playboy," Lorelai explained.

"I don't get it," Luke said bluntly and honestly. "She's upset because he's dating someone else two months after they broke up?"

"I think she's upset because she's not over him and she was hoping he wasn't over her either, though obviously he's moved on."

"Oh," Luke said, understanding. "So what do we do?"

Lorelai smiled. "We don't do anything."

"But she's hurt! There's gotta be a way to fix this."

"Aw, sweetie, I love that you care, but some things you just can't fix."

Luke thought for a moment. "Should I make her pie?"

Lorelai grinned and looped her arm through his, leaning her head on his shoulder. What a beautiful man. "Yeah, I think a pie would help. And maybe some cheesecake."

Luke started to nod until he remembered something. "Rory doesn't like cheesecake."

"I know. The cheesecake is for me."

Luke narrowed his eyes. "And just why exactly do you deserve a cheesecake?"

Lorelai grinned mischievously. Without saying a word, she crawled onto Luke's lap and gave him a passionate kiss.

"Oh, right," Luke said, his voice husky. "What flavor?"

Lorelai giggled and kissed him again.

* * *

Logan took a deep breath and knocked on the door, praying that the person on the other side would be in a receptive mood. Mostly he was just praying he wasn't about to get his ass kicked. 

"Taylor, I swear to God, if you've put a flower box out there again…" The door swung open. Luke looked at Logan in surprise. "What do you want?"

Logan took a deep breath. "Hey, um, the guy downstairs…um… Cesar… he said it was ok if I came on up. So here I am."

Luke looked him up and down and reluctantly opened the door wide enough for Logan to enter his apartment.

"Hey, nice place," Logan offered. "Must be really convenient."

Luke just gave him a look. "Let's cut the small talk and why don't we get to the part where the guy who broke Rory's heart tells me what in God's name he's doing here."

"Right," Logan said, switching gears. "Firstly, let's just clarify that Rory broke up with me, actually, she dumped my ass," he said with a slight grin.

"Ok," Luke said slowly, still standing there with his arms folded across his chest. He couldn't exactly deny that.

"Yet despite that, I'm standing here asking for your help."

Luke raised an eyebrow. "My help? What could I possibly do to help you?"

Logan walked over to the kitchen table and sat down, gesturing for Luke to sit with him. Luke rolled his eyes at the kid's arrogance, but let it pass.

"Well, see, I've come to find out over the months that Rory is not the kind of girl you can easily get over," Logan started. "She's special."

"Damn right she's special," Luke growled.

"I know! So you can understand why a guy like me, a guy who's never really depended on a girl or, I'll be frank, wanted to see the same girl twice, is completely stuck on her and unable to move on."

"Ok," Luke said, accepting his words, though somewhere in the back of his mind all he could think about was Rory crying over him and Logan being with someone else.

"Alright," Logan said, sighing with relief that Luke let him get this far. "So here's the thing. I still love her. I'll admit, I tried to get over her. I partied hard over spring break, and tried to get back into my usual lifestyle for the rest of the semester, but… well… the thrill was gone, if you know what I mean."

Luke actually didn't know what the hell he meant, but he nodded anyway.

"So I've decided that if these past few months sucked so bad, I can only imagine the future sucking even more if I don't at least try to do something to get her back."

Luke nodded again. "So… what are you going to do?"

"Well, that's where you come in," Logan said. "See, when we first broke up, I figured she was just being insecure or something. I know my parents had a lot to do with it, and I know she spoke to my dad specifically about things, but she also went on and on about how different we were. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is that I thought I could convince her otherwise. And not to sound conceited, but I've always considered my powers of persuasion one of my strengths. Charm is a family trait," Logan said wryly. "So I tried to do whatever I could think of to get her back for the first week or two. Flowers, candy, I even had the coffee guy follow her around for a day, which I thought for sure would be a worthwhile gesture. But no matter what I did, she gave me nothing. I gotta say, that's pretty bruising to my ego, so I gave up."

"So where's the part where I come in?" Luke asked.

"You've got to tell me what to do. I tried everything I could think of, and nothing worked, but you know her, you know what I could do that would actually give me a shot."

"I don't understand. Why didn't you just go to Lorelai? She knows Rory way better than I do."

"I guess I was banking on our rather brief conversation during that movie night we had here. I figured that Lorelai's number one priority would be protect Rory at all costs, especially from big bad college guys like myself," Logan said. "I'd get turned down flat. But you…" Logan paused. "You know how I really feel about her."

Luke thought back to that night when Logan confided in him that he loved Rory, but wasn't going to tell her because he was worried she'd freak out. He had to give the kid credit, he was a persistent little bugger.

"You really love her, huh?" Luke said.

"I really do," Logan replied honestly.

"Huh." Luke had a brief mental debate. On the one hand, Lorelai might kill him for helping the so-called enemy, but on the other hand, if what really mattered was Rory's happiness, it seemed like this guy was what would make her happy. And if Logan made Rory happy… Luke made up his mind. "Well, all I know to do is to stop with the gifts. Rory's never been a material person, so that crap doesn't work with her. Um…I guess I'd just tell her how you feel. I mean, that's what girls seem to want, is to hear you talk about your feelings. And if you've got to make grand gestures, do something more personal, something tailored to her personality. The kid has a lotta quirks, and I'm sure you've got to know at least some of them."

Logan thought about what Luke said. "Yes, yes I believe you're right. Thanks, Luke," Logan said, offering his hand. Luke shook it. "You've given me a lot to think about, and I really appreciate it."

"No problem," Luke said, standing up.

Logan stood as well. "I won't let her down," he said significantly.

"Good," Luke said with a hint of a smile.

"Thanks. I'll see you around," Logan said with a hopeful wink.

"Yeah, ok," Luke said dryly. "See ya."

* * *

Rory moped around the house. She supposed she could go visit her mom at the inn, but she was just not in a mood to deal with Michel or to be fussed over by Sookie. Maybe she'd go down to the bookstore, see if she could work a little and get store credit. But the first order of business was lunch. Did she feel like ordering pizza or Chinese? Or would she be evil and order Indian food to stink up the house so Lorelai would return to curry heaven? Rory walked over to the menu drawer but was interrupted by the ringing of the doorbell. 

She opened the door to see the Chinese delivery guy standing there with two full bags of food.

"Um... hi. Can I help you?" Rory asked, confused.

"Here's your order, ma'am," he said, holding out the two bags.

"I don't understand, there must be some mistake." Rory thought hard. She didn't actually call them yet, did she?

"No mistake, this is your food," he insisted, holding out the bags.

"Ok…" Maybe she was going crazy. "Let me just find my purse…"

"No, it's been paid for already," he said.

"What?" Rory said, truly confused.

"Tip too. Here you go," he said, finally thrusting the bags in her hands.

"Um, thanks," she said.

"Oh, and here," he said, reaching into his pocket as an afterthought. "Very special fortune cookie for you," he winked, dropping it in the top of the bag. "Goodbye!"

"Bye!" Rory called after him, shutting the front door with her foot. This was weird, very weird. She took the bags into the kitchen and began unloading the food. She pulled out her cell phone and dialed a number.

"_Independence Inn, Michel speaking_," he drawled.

"Hey, Michel. Is my mom around?"

"_I do not know, she is not at the front desk_," Michel said, disinterestedly.

Rory sighed in frustration. "Well can you find her please?" she said sweetly.

"_Oh, of course_," Michel said. "_I am but a dog, sent to fetch things. Fetch my mail, Michel. Fetch my snotty stinky children, Michel. And now, fetch my mother_," he ranted.

"Thank you, Michel," Rory said, undaunted by his sarcasm.

"_Here she is_," Michel said. "_It is your spawn_," he said, disdain dripping from his voice as he handed the phone to Lorelai.

"_Thank you, Michel. Hey babe, what's up?_" Lorelai said.

"Hey, Mom? Did you send Chinese food?"

"_Not that I remember. Why?_"

Rory looked at the table. "Uh, it's just that I have the entire seafood and appetizer menu sitting on our kitchen table, and I most definitely did not order it."

"_Ooh, intrigue! The take-out gods must look upon you favorably._"

"I guess…ok, well, if you didn't order it, then I have no idea who did. Should I eat it?" Rory asked apprehensively.

"_Rory, Rory, Rory. Of course you eat it. Have I taught you nothing? Besides, do you really think someone would send you poisoned Chinese food? Have you pissed off any other food group?_"

Rory rolled her eyes. "Not that I can think of. I'll just see if there's a note in it or something. I'll call you later."

"_Ok, you better, because you know how I can't stand unsolved delivery mysteries._"

"I don't recall you ever encountering another unsolved delivery mystery."

"_No, but that doesn't mean I don't know that I don't like them._"

"There were way too many negatives in that sentence, but I'll let it slide."

"_Thanks, hon. Oh – crap. Gotta go. Michel is holding an upside-down child by their ankles and shaking them vigorously._"

"I know an emergency when I hear one. Talk to you later."

"_Bye, sweets._"

Rory shook her head and returned to examining the food. She remembered the takeout guy telling her that it was a special fortune cookie. Maybe he was just trying to be cute, or maybe the cookie would tell her where the food came from. She wracked her brain to think of who it could be. Maybe Marty, since he was there when she got her fortune. No, Marty didn't have the funds to do something like this. Paris? No, she only fleetingly glanced at the fortune. And Lorelai just said she didn't send it. That was everyone who knew about the all-important fortune, the fortune that was now torn to shreds and resting in the bottom of her wastebasket, underneath layers of tissues, gum wrappers, and dried-out pens. She decided to bite the bullet and opened the plastic before cracking open the cookie.

"A sort-of-tall, not-very-dark, but definitely handsome man awaits you in the near future," she read aloud. What the hell? She flipped over the fortune to read the back. "Your lucky numbers are 12, 30, 5, and 14." Rory's heart leapt into her throat as she looked at the microwave clock. Sure enough, it was just after 12:30, and today was the 14th. "Chinese word: opportunity." Rory looked around. Opportunity? She thought quickly what all those things have to do with each other. Just as her mind flashed the cliché 'opportunity comes knocking,' there was a knock on the kitchen door that made her jump. She opened the door to see Logan standing there.

"Hey," he said simply.

"Hey," she said, looking back down at the fortune in her hands. "Definitely, huh? Cocky much?" she said with a half-grin.

Logan chuckled. "I had a feeling you'd eat the cookie first."

There was a silence as Rory considered all her options.

"I know you can pack away an entire menu by yourself, but may I come in?" Logan asked as she stood there with the door open.

"Um, sure," she said, standing aside and letting him in. She shut the door and stood in front of it, crossing her arms over her chest.

Logan sighed, not sure where to begin, but knowing what he wanted to say most. "I miss you."

Rory started to interject when he stepped closer to her, putting a finger on her lips. "I miss you, Ace."

Rory felt herself melting, but refused to get lost in his eyes and stepped back, letting his finger drop. "No, Logan, we can't do this. I'm not going to let lingering attraction cloud my judgment."

"Well, you see, I thought you might say that, so I had a chat with Luke," Logan said easily, going over to the table and setting out the food.

"With Luke?" Rory asked, watching as he sniffed a box, then opened it, setting it down on the table.

"Yeah he gave me some great advice," Logan said casually, laying out the chopsticks.

Rory narrowed her eyes. "And what advice was that?"

"He told me to tell you how I feel. That all the flowers in the world won't mean a thing to you. They won't show you how I feel. But this…" Logan gestured to the food, letting it speak for itself. "Well, I'm here to show you, really."

Rory tried to quell the butterflies in her stomach. "So, what, are you gonna make me an offer I can't refuse?"

"You better believe it," Logan said sexily.

Rory recognized the tone, and wrote it off as standard procedures for seduction. "Save it for one of your skinny bitch sexpots. I don't want to hold you back from conquering the entire Eastern Seaboard of eligible females," she said, unusually nasty. She was still hurting from seeing him with other women.

Logan stood up straight and looked at Rory from across the table. "Ace, you know no one can hold a candle to you," he said, quietly.

"Sure, more flattery. That'll work. How about we just both know that I know you're not gonna want me in six months, so what does it matter?"

"Ace, the very fact that I'm here should speak to that. If I still want you after getting ego-bruisingly dumped and ignored for over two months, what makes you think that more time will change my feelings?"

Rory searched his face to see if he was playing her, but all she found was sincerity. She expected this to just be about getting what he couldn't have, that perhaps he just wanted her because she had the audacity to reject him. But apparently he meant it.

"We're so different, though," she protested. "I mean, I over-analyze everything, with my pros and cons lists, and you, you jump off buildings for the hell of it without a second thought. I'm practical, and you're impulsive."

"Yeah, but don't you think that makes us even more right for each other?" Logan insisted. Rory looked at him like he was crazy. "You keep me grounded, and I'd like to think that I encourage you to take much-needed risks."

Rory took a moment to truly look at him, this boy who was standing before her so earnestly. Here was a guy who probably intimidated many and could work his charm on the rest, and he was standing in her kitchen trying to convince her why they should be together.

She began to feel bad about how she had treated him, though it was all done out of logic. "Why, Logan?" she asked honestly. This was the one burning question in her mind. "Why in the world do you want me? I mean, I'm not sexy like all those other girls. I'm boring compared to them, so why would you want to throw away all that excitement for someone like me? I'm a girlfriend girl, through and through, and that is guaranteed to bore you at some point. You're young, and you've only got a year left now to do as you please, so why would you spend your last year of quasi-freedom chained to someone like me?" Rory looked him straight in the eyes. "Seriously; it's not like I have self-esteem issues. I know who I am, and I'm comfortable with that. I just don't know if who I am is who you truly want."

Logan stepped around the table. "I see." He took a step closer. "Well, I could give you a long, long list of reasons why you're a great person, and why any man would be lucky to call you his own. But I think you already know all those. See, I think the real problem is that you don't know how much you affect me, Ace. And I don't think you realize how sexy you are," he said, running a finger up and down her bare arm.

Rory shivered and half-heartedly knocked his hand away. "Oh please," she scoffed, taking another step back until she was forced to lean on the counter.

"Oh, but you are, Ace," Logan said, putting his hands on either side of her, resting them on the countertop. "Plenty of girls can pull off sexy, but most of them can only do obvious sexy, like stripper-sexy or husband-catching sexy. But you, well, let's just say I find you sexy at the oddest times."

"Oh yeah? Like when?" Rory said, her breath quickening.

Logan smirked. "Like when you're talking to my friends and you laugh. I love your laugh. And when you're across the room and I catch your eye and you give me a smile that I know is just for me. And when you wake up in the morning and make those little noises that mean you're still trying to sneak back to sleep until I wave coffee in your face. You're sexy when you're studying and chewing on your pen cap. You're sexy when you're being all Ace Reporter-y, determined to get your scoop. But most of all," Logan said, leaning so close that his lips hovered over hers, "you're sexiest when you kiss me."

Rory looked up at him through half-lidded eyes. Damn him. He forced her to be the one to close the infinitesimal distance between their lips. She kissed him tentatively at first, then hungrily, making up for three months of not kissing him at all. She felt Logan smile against her lips as they broke away. He peppered her face with small kisses along her jaw, on her cheeks, and on her nose, ending them with a tender kiss on the lips.

"So you believe me now?" he said, nuzzling her neck.

"What do you mean, believe you?" Rory said, closing her eyes and reveling in the sensation.

Logan pulled away and looked at her. "I mean I love you, Ace. Despite both our best efforts, I have fallen hopelessly in love with you, and I just don't see that ending anytime soon."

"Oh, that," Rory teased, finally letting go of all her doubt.

"Yes, that," Logan said. "So do you have something to tell me?" he prodded.

"Well," Rory said, tilting her head to the side and pretending to think, "I had lunch at Hector's yesterday. The taco was good, but the cheese dip was a little on the spicy side, and-"

"Ace!" Logan whined. "Come on, you're killing me here."

Rory grinned. "I guess I love you too."

"You guess or you know?"

"I know," Rory said seriously. She shrieked as Logan picked her up and twirled her around, giving her an exuberant kiss.

"Excellent! Alright, let's go," he said, grabbing her hand and pulling her out into the hall.

"Go? Go where?"

"Didn't you say you wanted to go backpacking across Europe this summer?" Logan said innocently.

"Backpacking?" Rory said with a raised eyebrow, not recalling saying anything about that.

"Well, perhaps instead we'll travel in style," he allowed, going into her room and searching through her top drawer until he found her passport, dropping it into her nearby purse.

"What kind of style?" Rory said, giving him a smirk of her own.

Logan stopped and reached in his pocket. "Honeymoon style," he said quietly, a mischievous gleam in his eye as he pulled out a small velvet box. He opened the box to reveal the wedding set. Rory gasped as Logan slipped the rings back onto her finger.

"Is this another pretend honeymoon or are you forgetting to ask me a very important question?" Rory said, her eyes darting back and forth between Logan and her hand, not sure how she wanted him to answer.

"Come on, you don't have much time to pack," Logan said evasively, walking backwards, hands in pockets. "Is that what you're wearing?" he teased.

"Logan…" Rory said, trailing after him, trying to give him a stern look; the only problem was, his wide smile was infectious. Oh, what the hell. Rory sighed. "I'll get my purse."

Logan grinned. "Atta girl," he said, slipping an arm around her and giving her a quick kiss. He grabbed her hand and pulled her out the door and down the porch steps. "Come on. We're gonna go anywhere and everywhere. You name it, we'll go there."

Rory laughed freely. "You know, I've always wanted to go to Fez…"

* * *

THE END

* * *


	20. Gilmoreisms

GILMORE-ISMS

* * *

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing but my imagination.

**Author's Note:** Here's your reference guide to all the Gilmore-isms in the story.

* * *

**Chapter 1**

"_How about a Carol Burnett?"_

Carol Burnett, a comedienne whose many accomplishments include her own variety show (and who was also seen recently on ABC's Disney tv-movie version of "Once Upon a Mattress") had a trademark move in which she pulls on one ear.

* * *

**Chapter 2**

"_Look, I'm not Cliff Clavin here, ok?"_

Cliff Clavin was the name of John Ratzenberger's character on "Cheers," a popular TV show in the 1980s. Cliff Clavin was a mailman.

* * *

**Chapter 3**

"_Let's start with Captain Picard," she said with a mischievous gleam in her eye. "Do you, um, need to wear your Star Trek shirt for this?"_

This is a dual reference. Patrick Stewart is a classically trained actor who once upon a time performed with the Royal Shakespeare Company, but is best known for his film and television roles. One of his most popular roles is as Captain Jean-Luc Picard of the Starship Enterprise on the television series "Star Trek: The Next Generation" (and its ensuing movies). The second half of the reference is about Luke's childhood obsession with Star Trek. Apparently he once wore a Star Trek shirt every day for a year.

"_Patience, young Skywalker," chided Logan. "Here's the limo now – watch your head."_

A reference to Luke Skywalker, the main character in the original Star Wars trilogy, when he was going through training to become a Jedi knight.

"_Hello, possums!" Finn proclaimed._

"_Oh no, it's Dame Edna's ugly stepsister," Logan moaned._

"_He seems more like a Sir Les Patterson, I think," Rory offered._

"_Well as long as I'm not a bloody friend of Kenny, I'll take it," Finn said._

Dame Edna Everage is a character created by Barry Humphries. Dame Edna is a jet-setting Australian widow who has hosted her own talk show and is a frequent performer on Broadway, injecting her own particular brand of humor and her strong opinions in all she meets. 'Hello, possums!' is her affectionate greeting, and Sir Les Patterson is a regular guest on her shows, debauched as he may be. Kenny is the name of one of her sons who is quite possibly homosexual.

"_Oh my God," interrupted Colin, "we're in fucking Mayberry. Look, an honest-to-God old-fashioned soda shop! And look, the guy inside looks like he belongs in a freakin' barbershop quartet."_

Mayberry, North Carolina is the name of the fictitious idyllic town in which "The Andy Griffith Show" is set.

"_You know, those curtains would make a hell of a dress," Logan replied as they sat down._

"_I am offended. I always thought I was more of a Melanie than a Scarlett," she said._

"_Oh, I believe you have an inner Scarlett," Logan intimated, "you just need to let her out more often."_

These are all references to "Gone with the Wind," a movie based on Margaret Mitchell's novel about the change in the South around the Civil War. Scarlett O'Hara was the main character, who was rather conniving and selfish, and used her womanly wiles and sharp brain to get what she wanted out of life. Melanie was the soft-spoken sweet antithesis to Scarlett. The curtain reference is about when Scarlett, needing money but wanting to appear rich, fashioned a new gown out of the curtains hanging in her house.

"_Master and Commander, babe," Logan said with a grin. He took a sip of coffee. "This is really good," he said, smirking._

Once again, a dual reference. "Master and Commander" was a movie starring Russell Crowe in the main role, and when Rory and Logan first meet – well, when they meet for the second time – they argue, and Logan thinks that he wins and asks Rory to call him Master and Commander.

"_Not really, man, no," Logan replied. "So don't worry, Chachi; Joanie's all yours," he said with a smirk._

Joanie and Chachi are high school sweethearts on the tv show "Happy Days," and they got their own short-lived spinoff called "Joanie Loves Chachi."

* * *

**Chapter 4**

"_Yes," she said slowly, "I also know that gum on the street is not free candy and a peep show is not letting you look at presents before Christmas, but that's not the point." _

"_Huh?" Luke said, raising an eyebrow._

"_Ok," Lorelai said authoritatively, "Elf is officially added to our Christmas Movie Marathon," Lorelai said._

In the Christmas movie "Elf," Will Farrell plays a Buddy, a human who was raised as an elf in the North Pole and goes to New York City to find his real dad. Buddy is naïve about the ways of the city, so Santa has to give him some pointers.

"_Anyway," Lorelai said, getting back to the matter at hand, "everyone has special talents. Milli Vanilli could lip synch, the Supernanny can make children behave, and I can predict snow," she said triumphantly._

Milli Vanilli was a rock group that was widely mocked for lip synching their songs. The Supernanny has her own ABC tv show. She is an English girl who goes to average American homes where parents feel that their kids are out of control and teaches the children to behave and listen to their parents.

"_Ladies and gentlemen, my mother, the Punxsutawney Phil of snow," Rory said._

Punxsutawney Phil is the official groundhog who gives the weather prediction on Groundhog's Day.

"_Oh, please!" Rory said. "He nearly brained him with the Bop-It."_

A dual reference; the Bop-It is a toy that is for two people to play, and the Bop-It tells you a task to perform and you do it. The tasks speed up until the first person makes a mistake and loses the game. Rory and Lorelai pull out the Bop-It to resuscitate un-fun evenings, and had to use it on Luke and Dean when they were practically fighting on a double date.

"_You know we're going to have to show him Neil Young in a tux again, right?" Rory said._

Dual reference: Neil Young was a singer-songwriter who established a solo reputation as well as one with Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young. Rory also showed Dean a video featuring Neil Young in a tuxedo in order to convince him that it would be cool to wear one.

_P.S. This is for your inner Scarlett. _

Another reference to Scarlett O'Hara, the main character from "Gone with the Wind."

_Rory's pulse raced. She dropped the card and slowly unwrapped the present, finding a blue Tiffany box. She opened the box and gasped. Inside was a pair of gorgeous diamond chandelier earrings. Rory heard Dean coming back through the common room and shoved the box and envelope in her coat pocket._

Tiffany and Co. is perhaps the most famous jeweler's in the world. Their trademark boxes are always a specific shade of blue tied with a white ribbon.

"_Yeah, apparently this is a Vera Wang," Rory said loftily._

Vera Wang is a world-famous designer.

"_The last of the blond bombshells?" Lorelai offered._

"The Last of the Blonde Bombshells" was a movie starring Judi Dench, Ian Holm, Leslie Caron, Olympia Dukakis, and Joan Sims. Lorelai changed it to "blond," the male version of blonde to fit Logan.

"_Yes, well, I tried to fashion one out of Luke's curtains, but it proved too difficult, so this had to do."_

Another reference to the ingenuity of Scarlett O'Hara.

"_What? I said nothing!" Stephanie protested. "Well if you're going to yell at me anyway: you liiiiike her. You think she's seeexy, you wanna kiiiss her, hug her and daaate her," said Stephanie in a singsong voice._

Stephanie is mimicking a cute scene from "Miss Congeniality," starring Sandra Bullock in which she teases her partner.

"_Come on," Logan said. "He's been dyin' to do West Side Story again. The knife fights are the best. And the world doesn't seem quite so bad when he sings 'I Feel Pretty.'"_

"West Side Story" is a musical version of the classic Romeo and Juliet tale set in the 1960s New York City world of gangs.

* * *

**Chapter 5**

"_Hey!" Rory said, pulling away. "Stay away from the hair. It took Stephanie and me two hours to turn me into Myrna Loy. It was not easy, let me tell you," Rory said, checking her 1930's-inspired tresses. _

Myrna Loy was a popular actress in the golden days of Hollywood. One of her most famous roles was as Nora Charles in "The Thin Man" movies. Nick and Nora Charles are wealthy socialites who just so happen to also be able to solve murders. Nick used to be a detective, but quit after marrying Nora, but somehow they still manage to always be on the trail of the murderer of whichever Thin Man was featured in that particular movie.

"_Why, Asta! We've been looking all over for you! Found any clues?" Rory said, sharing a grin with Logan. 'Asta' just barked. _

"Asta" is the name of Nick and Nora Charles' dog in the "Thin Man" novels and movies.

"_Sherlock Holmes, I presume?" Logan said, sticking out his hand. _

_Colin merely chewed on his pipe and whipped out a magnifying glass to inspect Logan's hand. He swept out his tweed coat. "Clean fingernails, soft hands; you've never done a day of work in your life, have you, Nick?" he said with a ridiculous English accent. _

_Logan laughed. "Good deduction, my man. You see I have my Nora," Logan paused as Rory gave a slow nod of acknowledgement, "but where's your Doctor Watson?" _

Sherlock Holmes is one of the most famous detectives in history. Sir Arthur Conan Doyle first wrote novels featuring this character, and since then Holmes has been seen in many reincarnations, including radio, film, and television. Holmes is often accompanied by a Doctor Watson when solving his crimes.

"_Magnum, P.I., at your service," Robert said._

"Magnum, P.I." was the name of a popular tv detective of the 1980s played by Tom Selleck.

"_Yeah; Jim and Gary were pulling up. They went with Simon and Simon. I'm also fairly sure I saw Jonah, who, by the way, might be very chemically altered," Robert said. _

"_What makes you say that?" Rory asked, tilting her head. _

"_He came as Miss Marple," Robert deadpanned. Everyone laughed. _

"Simon & Simon" was a tv show about two brothers who ran a private detective agency, played by Gerald McRaney and Jameson Parker. Miss Marple is one of Agatha Christie's creations; she is a spinster detective.

"_Ah, Inspector Clouseau, glad you could make it," Logan said. _

"_Yes. I regret Kato could not accompany me. I told him we did not have enough hrooom," Finn said in his best Peter Sellers' impression. _

Inspector Clouseau is a character played by Peter Sellers in the Blake Edwards films about the Pink Panther. Clouseau is a rather bumbling detective with a ridiculous accent and a houseman called Kato who attacks him at random in order to hone his skills. (Perfect for Finn, n'est-ce pas?)

"_Well," he said, squinting at the card, "it says something about everything coming up roses and a toolbox, but every damn house here has a garden!" Finn whined. _

_Rory thought for a moment. "Of course! Kirk's love of musicals rears its ugly head. Go to Gypsy's; she fixes cars, and I guess look inside her toolbox," she explained. _

The clue refers to "Gypsy," a musical about a stage mother whose dream for her children overtakes her life. One of the main numbers is "Everything's Coming Up Roses."

"_I thought you meant like – you know, the traditional kind of carrying, like over-the-threshold kind, like the Clark Gable in Gone with the Wind up-the-staircase kind!" Rory protested, finally stopping her struggle. _

"_Well, I am doing the Clark Gable kind of carrying; it's just the It Happened One Night kind of carrying," he said reasonably. _

Clark Gable as Rhett Butler, in a memorable scene from "Gone with the Wind," sweeps Scarlett off her feet and carries her struggling up the staircase to ravish her. In "It Happened One Night" (a movie that you all must rush out to see), Clark Gable plays a reporter, Peter Warne, who travels with a spoiled heiress to get a good story as she runs away from her father.

"_Is Emeril taken? 'Cause suddenly I feel very single. Or what about the Naked Chef? Jamie what's-his-face. He's closer to my age," Rory said, setting her chin in her hand. _

"_Aw, honey, it's Jamie Oliver, but you already have one Naked Guy in your life," Lorelai said, stroking Rory's back. _

Emeril is a chef known for his trademark exclamation of "bam!" Jamie Oliver is a British chef who is also called The Naked Chef.

"_What are you, Dr. Phil?" Logan said derisively. "You're full of crap." _

Dr. Phil McGraw is a psychologist who was first featured on Oprah and then got his own talk show where he dispenses his Texan straight-talking advice.

"_Oh please," Colin scoffed. "Logan Huntzberger, man's man, man about town, having a serious girlfriend? Now is the time to play, man, before real life starts. You only have another year to live it up before you gotta be responsible."_

The "man's man, man about town" is a reference to the movie "Down With Love" starring Ewan MacGregor and Renee Zellweger, where MacGregor plays a cad who plays the field and Zellweger hatches a plan to make him commit.

* * *

**Chapter 6**

_"What's with you?" Paris asked, busy at her craft station. "You've been in a very Daria mood lately."_

Daria Morgendorffer is an animated character who had her own show on MTV which was a spinoff from Beavis and Butt-head. She has great contempt for the shallow and superficial world, as personified by her sister, Quinn. She is very cynical and sarcastic.

_"You've been Bingleyed," Paris said authoritatively._

_"Excuse me?" Rory said, eyebrows raised._

_"You're Jane, and Huntzberger is Bingley. He's dropped you like a hot potato for no apparent reason, am I right?"_

Paris is making an analogy to Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen. The heroine of the novel is Elizabeth Bennett, and she has four sisters, the eldest of which is Jane. Jane's love interest is Mr. Bingley, an amiable fellow who is very much in love with her, but his friend Mr. Darcy convinces him to abort his intentions toward Jane due to her unsuitable family and position in society. Of course, Mr. Darcy eventually realizes he is in the wrong about that decision... not long after he realizes he's in love with Elizabeth. If you have not read this book, read it! Or if you want a faithful adaptation, watch the miniseries version with Colin Firth as Mr. Darcy. This is still my favorite version, although the recent Hollywood adaptation starring Keira Knightley as Elizabeth was well done. You can watch the old version starring Katharine Hepburn, but be aware that there are many discrepancies. Or, if Bollywood is your thing, you can watch Bride and Prejudice, where our very own Alexis Bledel has a small role as Darcy's little sister!

_"Yeah, except he changed the theme. What once was the Chinese New Year, to honor his fascination after seeing Memoirs of a Geisha, changed to neo-Bohemian squalor, then Narnia, briefly back to a night at Hogwarts, then to King Kong," Robert replied._

_"So what's the final verdict?" Logan asked with a grin._

_"Well, we convinced him to abandon the whole gay cowboy theme and finally he agreed to a general Hollywood theme, as long as the stars/roles are recognizable."_

The neo-Bohemian squalor theme refers to the movie version of the musical Rent, Narnia obviously from the Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe, and a night at Hogwarts to Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. The gay cowboy theme came from Brokeback Mountain.

_"Ach, who knows. She figures if Demi can do it, so can Patty," Lorelai said. "So what do you think? Poofy enough?" she asked, holding up a mirror._

A reference to the May-December romance between Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore.

_"Ok," Lorelai said. She stepped back and looked at Rory. "Just, please, Golightly on him, ok?" she said with a straight face._

Rory is going to the party as Holly Golightly from "Breakfast at Tiffany's," one of Audrey Hepburn's most famous roles. It is based on a novella by Truman Capote.

_"Yes. A-hem. I guess it's time to... haul out the Hol-ly! Put up the tree be-fore my," clap, "spirit falls again!" she sang._

Another reference to Holly Golightly.

_"Cut the Mame before I maim you!" Rory threatened._

The excerpt that Lorelai just sang was from "We Need A Little Christmas" from the musical "Mame."

_"I hope you'll be Peppard with compliments! Bye!" Lorelai said in one breath before making a fast exit._

Audrey Hepburn's costar in Breakfast at Tiffany's was George Peppard.

_"Indy, Marilyn," she said icily. Logan, ignoring her tone, grinned and tipped his hat. He had a wide brown fedora perched on his head, and he wore a loose white shirt with the top few buttons unbuttoned along with some khaki slacks. Over the shirt, he wore a brown leather jacket, and he also wore a holster that held a fake gun and a very real whip. His date was a skinnier version of Marilyn Monroe._

Logan is dressed up as Indiana Jones. Let us take a moment to think about the sexiness that was Harrison Ford pre-Calista.

_"Right, Larissa. This is Larissa," he said. "So," he said to Robert, trying to mask his jealousy, "you're the Duke, eh?"_

John Wayne, western movie star extraordinaire, was nicknamed The Duke. There are many theories as to how he got that nickname, but Wayne himself said he was named after a dog. Which, by the way, do you think Spielburg and Co. stole that idea for the third Indiana Jones movie when they explain that he's really Henry Jones Junior, which is why Sean Connery's character keeps calling him Junior, and that Indiana was their dog? Hmm.

_"Of course I am, darling," slurred Finn. "I'm fucking Johnny Weissmuller, can't you see the resemblance?" he asked, striking a muscle pose._

Johnny Weissmuller is the man most people associate with the screen presence of Tarzan. He was actually an Olympic gold medalist in swimming before winning the role of playing Tarzan to Maureen O'Sullivan's Jane. His Tarzan movies were released throughout the 1930s and 1940s.

_"Um, you know what?" Rory said. "I think Jane sees Cheetah. Jane go now," she said with a grin._

Cheetah was the name of Tarzan's chimpanzee friend.

_"Hey, Billie Jean is not my girl," Logan said._

Logan is quoting a line from the Michael Jackson song "Billie Jean."

_"Aah! Kill my buzz, why don't ya?" Robert said indignantly._

Ok, so this isn't exactly a pop culture reference, but I was watching a Dawson's Creek Season 3 DVD when writing this chapter, and for anyone who remembers or cares, it was the season where Pacey and Joey get together, and in one episode the group goes to Dawson's Aunt Gwen's house for spring break and she recalls meeting Pacey as a child. He was chasing Joey around the yard, and when Aunt Gwen went to stop him, he said "hey lady, kill my buzz, why don't ya?" and so I had to use it. The end.

_"I heard you, but I don't quite follow," he said. Realization dawned on his face. "Was that one of your GRE words-of-the day?" he teased, smirking. Rory just glared at him._

For those who don't have to freak out about this test, the GRE stands for the Graduate Record Examination, which is basically the SAT for grad school.

_"Man, that was a real Letterman/O'Reilly moment you guys were having," Colin said, coming up to Logan._

Colin is referring to the much publicized impromptu debate when Bill O'Reilly was a guest on Letterman, and boy, did they get into it!

* * *

**Chapter 7**

"_Well, I find it rancid. Can't you get in touch with your inner Deepak Chopra somewhere else?" Rory complained. _

Deepak Chopra is a famous holistic healer.

_Lorelai pulled up next to Rory in the Gilmore driveway. She got out to hug Rory and ended up giving her the two-pat distance hug. "Love your new perfume. Eau de Pepé Le Pew?" _

Pepé Le Pew is a Warner Brothers cartoon character. He is an amorous skunk, whose stench prevents him from successfully wooing his intended.

"_Oh, I fired Sophie. She was incompetent," Emily said flippantly, closing the door behind them and taking their coats. _

"_So it wasn't Sophie's Choice to leave?" Lorelai said in mock seriousness. _

Sophie's Choice was a movie starring Meryl Streep.

"_Yes, she did!" Lorelai said emphatically. "They were carelessly flung away, like Zsa Zsa Gabor's latest husband." _

Zsa Zsa Gabor holds the prestigious rank of being the celebrity who was married the most times.

"_Yeah?" Emily said, drawing out the word. "It's so refreshing to know that people feel comfortable enough to use slang in any given situation these days. I cannot tell you how thrilled I am that we are such a casual society. Tell you what, why don't I go change into some hip huggers and we'll listen to Eminem while we have our drinks, hm?" _

Eminem, real name Marshall Mathers, is a rapper.

"_I can imagine. How about your love life? Does Annette still have her Frankie?" Emily asked cheekily. _

Annette Funicello, the most famous of the Mousketeers, made a series of beach movies with Frankie Avalon, a teen heartthrob at the time. (You probably would recognize him as the angel in the number "Beauty School Dropout" from "Grease.")

"_Hey, so, That 70s Show is gonna end this year, pretty sad, huh?" Lorelai said, blurting out the first thing that came to her mind. "Yeah," Lorelai said, gaining momentum. "That show, you know, with the kids in the 1970s and they… um… live in the 1970s, and I think they smoke pot sometimes but it's still really sad that it's over, you know? Because two of the main characters left, and, come on, was the show really gonna survive without Eric and Kelso?" Lorelai said sensibly. _

"That 70s Show" is one of Fox's greatest hits, and until recently starred Topher Grace and Ashton Kutcher in two of the main roles.

"_Hey," Lorelai said defensively, "I could have gone on a rant about Howard Stern moving to satellite radio. Before you know it, two strippers and a midget would have wormed their way into the subject matter. Did you really want that to happen?" _

Lorelai is referring to the moving of the shock jock to Sirius. Howard Stern's shows always push the envelope of taste and raunchiness.

"_Yes, a monologue. Maybe something like… ooh! Like Lester Bangs, Almost Famous." She started ranting in what was meant to be a man's voice. "You see this? This is fatuous, pseudo blubber! You know...which is fine, but...to foist it off as art -- Or The Doors? Jim Morrison? He's a drunken buffoon posing a poet. Aw. Give me the Guess Who. Come on. They got the courage to be drunken buffoons, which makes them poetic!" _

Lorelai is quoting a monologue from "Almost Famous," a movie based on Cameron Crowe's days as a journalist for Rolling Stone Magazine.

"_I've got a job to do, too," Lorelai said in her best Bogart, imploring to Rory/Ilsa. "Where I'm going, you can't follow. What I've got to do, you can't be any part of. Ilsa, I'm no good at being noble, but it doesn't take much to see that the problems of three little people don't amount to a hill of beans in this crazy world." _

Lorelai is now doing the famous last scene from " Casablanca," where Rick, the hero, sends the love of his life, Ilsa, away with another man.

"_Wait, wait, come on, I gotta do one girl one! Ok ok. Save the best for last: Who am I?" Lorelai said, preparing Rory. "My aunt died of influenza, so they said. But it's my belief they done the old woman in. Yes, Lord love you! Why should she die of influenza when she come through diphtheria right enough the year before?" _

Lorelai is impersonating Eliza Doolittle from "My Fair Lady." This is the scene where Eliza is trying to sound posh, but failing miserably.

"_We are clear! Very clear! Brita clear!" Rory said emphatically. _

Rory is referring to a Brita filter, which probably every single one of you out there has.

"_I had a farm in Africa...I had a farm in Africa at the foot of the Ngong Hills. I had a farm in Africa..." Lorelai said dreamily. _

Lorelai is now doing her best Meryl Streep from "Out of Africa," a movie where Streep uses a Dutch accent. "Out of Africa" also stars Robert Redford as her love interest. By the way, everyone should see this movie. Just don't forget the tissues. John Barry's soundtrack alone is enough to make you cry!

"_Well, I can't seem to remember it. What was the name, Richard? Evil?" _

"_Oh, I don't know, Emily, I'll have to check after dinner," Richard said distractedly. _

"_Wicked?" Rory asked excitedly. _

"Wicked" is a musical based on the book of the same name by Gregory Maguire. It tells the story of the unlikely friendship between Ephalba (who we later know as the Wicked Witch of the West) and Glinda. Idina Menzel, who originated the role of Maureen in "Rent" on Broadway, won the Tony Award for her portrayal of Ephalba in "Wicked."

_Lorelai surveyed her. "Hmm: all black, very pointy shoes, purse that can only hold the extremely portable Dorothy Parker and half a lipstick… yep, very New York-y." _

An insider Gilmore reference: When Dean takes Rory to her first dance at Chilton, he comments on how heavy her purse is, and she explains that she always carries a book, and this time it's the portable Dorothy Parker.

"_Aw, honey, don't you know? Yente's gonna make you marry the butcher," Lorelai said, stroking her hair. _

Yente is the matchmaker in "Fiddler on the Roof," and made a match for Tzeitel, the eldest daughter, to marry the butcher, though she really wanted to marry someone else.

"_Um… Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice!" Lorelai exclaimed. She went silent. _

"Beetlejuice" was a Tim Burton film starring Michael Keaton as the title character. In order to summon the help of the main character, one must repeat his name three times.

"_Hush honey, never interrupt Mommy's Harry Belafonte. 'Shake, shake, shake Señora, shake it all the time…'" _

Harry Belafonte is a Jamaican-American calypso singer, probably most famous for his "Banana Boat Song," which Rory quotes. In the movie "Beetlejuice," the above song is sung at the end of the movie.

"_Come on, I'm Billy Idol over here!" pleaded Lorelai. _

Billy Idol, a rock singer from the 1980s, sang a song called "Dancing with Myself."

* * *

**Chapter 8**

"_I hear the new Ephalba is fantastic," he said. Still, Rory said nothing. _

Ephalba is the name of the main character in the book/musical "Wicked."

_Logan was running out of ideas, and was frankly miffed that Rory was not going to submit to his charm. "So, are you gonna Marcel Marceau your way through the evening, or what?" _

Marcel Marceau is the name of the most famous mime of all time.

"_Not necessarily," Rory said, flipping down the visor and adjusting her hair. "I could communicate by whistle." _

"_Yeah, I don't think the Harpo approach is really gonna work for me," he said dryly. _

Harpo is one of the Marx Brothers, and he never says a word – only blows a whistle!

"_Hey, I'm flying high, defying gravity!" Rory quipped from her seat. _

That's a line from "Defying Gravity," Ephalba's solo Act I finale.

"_Now it would take some serious drinking to get me footloose and fancy free," Finn said, making a face. _

"_Whaddya say, Ace?" Logan asked. _

"_Let's hear it for the boy," she responded dryly. _

References to "Footloose," that great '80s movie starring Kevin Bacon. One of the hit songs from that musical was "Let's Hear It for the Boy."

"_Hey," she said defensively, "I stayed up pretty late last night. It was movie night at the Gilmore house, which meant movies until 3 a.m. complete with every kind of junk food imaginable. If Pinky and the Brain over here wanna go conquer the world, be my guest, but I'm down for the count." _

Pinky and the Brain are two characters from the Warner Brothers cartoon show "Animaniacs" who had their own short-lived spinoff. They are lab mice, and Brain is obviously the smart one who always comes up with schemes to take over the world, and Pinky is his dim-witted accomplice. Everyone say it with me: "Are you pondering what I'm pondering, Pinky?" "I think so, Brain, but if Jimmy cracks corn, and nobody cares, then why does he still do it?"

"_Right, well, two out of three ain't bad," Rory said wryly. _

I know, I know, a clichéd reference to the Meatloaf song. So sue me.

"_Ha! Bloody brilliant!" Finn crowed. "When we get back, you call her and tell her I want to play MASH. She can be the Korean peasant, and I'll be the dashing young doctor who sweeps her off her feet despite the fact that we speak different languages," Finn said, getting lost in his fantasy. _

Finn is living in the dreamworld of MASH, a TV show based on the movie of the same name. It's about a group of doctors stationed in Korea during the Korean war, and was alternately a comedy or drama depending on the storyline. Random factoids: did you know that the TV show ran longer than the actual war did? And did you know that the series finale was, like, the most watched TV thing ever? Or maybe it was until that point in time. I should Google that.

"_My next little bottle here," Finn said, choosing a new bottle from the minibar. He took a sip. "Ugh! It's rubbish. Good thing you passed on the offer. Bloody disgusting," he said, setting it down. "Right: what's up first? Oompa Loompas or Stellaaaa!" he asked, flopping down on one of the beds. Colin grabbed a bottle for himself and settled on the other bed. _

Oompa Loompas are the names of the workers in Willy Wonka's chocolate factory, and "Stella!" is the classic cry uttered by Marlon Brando's brutish character in "A Streetcar Named Desire." I'm telling you, you have got to watch that movie!

* * *

**Chapter 9**

"_Yes, well, I realized that the first step was to send Colin and Finn home. I mean, the day was much more pleasant without Dumb and Dumber, right?" Logan said. _

"Dumb and Dumber" is a hilarious movie starring Jeff Daniels and Jim Carrey which prompted an entire generation of guys to threaten their prom dates with the possibility of wearing orange or powder blue tuxedos. The title is self-explanatory.

"_It was," Rory agreed. "I have a hard time seeing Finn give the Inside CNN tour its proper respect. We would have been one bomb scene from Meet the Parents away from getting kicked out." _

In "Meet the Parents," Ben Stiller is the main character, and at the end of an extremely stressful and frustrating visit to his would-be fiancée's house he is taking a flight home and has a bit of a run-in with the airport staff when they inform him that his bag is too big to be considered a carry-on. His meltdown is perhaps the funniest part of the whole movie.

"_No, I don't know. Suddenly you're going all Harrison Ford on me; do you plan on rescuing any wayward hikers while we're in this thing? And by the way, didn't you sink a yacht?" Rory countered. _

Rory is referring to Harrison Ford's love of flying planes, and specifically an incident where he was flying his helicopter and rescued a hiker stranded on a mountain.

"_Well, don't you need a bomber jacket? I mean, the sunglasses I could forgive, but the jacket completes the Cruise image," Rory teased. _

Rory is describing Tom Cruise's character from "Top Gun."

"_Tell me something: out of all the restaurants in New York that you could have chosen from, with Zagat's help, mind you, you're taking me to Luke's?" Rory asked incredulously. _

The Zagat Guide is a well-known guide to restaurants, and many restaurants proudly display their Zagat ratings.

"_My mother's lawn," she clarified. "My house here in Stars Hollow. Oh yeah, and you can't hire somebody to do your dirty work, ohhhh no. You have to physically mow it yourself for…a month. Without John Deere's help." _

"John Deere" is a brand name of industrial machinery, often used in agriculture, construction, and, you guessed it, lawn and grounds care. (Of course, when most people think John Deere, the immediate image is of a tractor. But Rory means a riding lawn mower.)

"_Hey Beavis, where's Butthead?" Logan said, distracting Colin from his line of questioning. _

Ah, Beavis and Butt-head, the MTV show about two degenerate cartoon characters known for their characteristic laugh. Huh huh huh.

* * *

**Chapter 10**

"_Ok, ok," Logan said. "So we promise not to get physical?" _

"_By Olivia Newton-John, I think he's got it!" Rory said._

"Let's Get Physical" is one of Olivia Newton-John's greatest hits.

"_Yeah, it's like he's joined some new commitment religion," Rory commented. _

"_Oh, I heard about that one. Madonna's going to join it and Gwyneth is going to name her next baby after it," Lorelai said loftily. _

"_Yes, and what is up with celebrity baby names? Apple, Coco, what's wrong with these people?" Rory asked. _

"_Do I look like Robin Leach to you? I got nothin'," Lorelai said. "So let me get this straight; you've been sleeping there every night this week?"_

Lotsa references! Ok: They're referring to Madonna joining Kabbalah, a trendy religion-of-the-moment as far as celebrities are concerned, and Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin named their first child "Apple." Courtney Cox and David Arquette named their daughter " Coco." Yes, as in Chanel. And finally, Robin Leach was the host of a television show called "Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous."

"_Ugh, no way, at least go to Wal-Mart; K-Mart sucks," Lorelai said. _

"_Ok, Rain Man," Rory said dryly. "Hey, did I ever tell you? I ran into Dean at the concert. He asked if I was going to the winter carnival this weekend. I told him I was, and I think we might have agreed to hang out."_

Lorelai is quoting Dustin Hoffman in the 1980s drama " Rain Man." Good movie, often quoted, important in pop culture. Watch it with a box of tissues.

"_867-5309," Lane replied, going to wait on another table. _

_Finn began frantically pushing numbers into his cell phone. "Hold on, I think I need that again." _

_Rory giggled. "Finn, you can stop. That's Jenny's number," she explained._

Great 1980s song by Tommy Tutone. You know you love it. You also know you'll be humming it in your sleep tonight.

_Lorelai reconsidered. "On second though, you kids go, I have to talk to Luke. Just remember, if you need anything, who you gonna call?" she asked, pointing to herself. _

"_Ghostbusters?" Rory offered._

Tagline from the Ghosbusters movies!

"_Bye," Colin said with a grin. "Come on, Finn, let's find you a nice girl, preferably one who doesn't speak English. Wanna go to Europe? We can find you a nice milkmaid…" he trailed off as they exited the diner._

Gilmore universe reference: remember when Colin brought back the milkmaid in Season 6? Funny funny funny!

"_Same bat-time, same bat-channel," Lorelai said. She watched with a smile as Kirk left. Luke finally appeared from the kitchen._

What they used to say at the end of every episode of the Batman tv series.

"_You will skip class today," Logan said, waving his hand over Rory's face. _

"_You know, Jedi mind tricks only work on the weak of mind," Rory said, elbowing Logan in bed._

Logan is attempting a Ben Kenobi from the first Star Wars movie. Obviously, Jedi mind tricks don't work on Rory.

"_What's up with you? You look very smug. Are you and Huntzberger still all Rock Hudson and Doris Day?"_

Rock Hudson and Doris Day made a series of light-hearted romantic comedies in the 1950s, pretty much pure as they could be. Possibly because Rock Hudson was gay in real life.

_She was a miracle worker! What was it Paris said the other day? Oh yes, she was Annette Bening._

Sort of a Gilmore-universe reference. Annette Bening tamed the playboy Warren Beatty, and Paris compared it to Rory taming Logan.

* * *

**Chapter 11**

"_Wow. Lovely little Blair Witch thing you've got going on," Paris remarked callously. "Tissue?" she offered._

Paris is referring to the movie "The Blair Witch Project" in which there were many close-ups of a terrified girl with snot hanging out of her nose.

"_It is a puzzlement," Paris said._

Paris is quoting the King of Siam from "The King and I," a Rodgers and Hammerstein musical. The film version starred Yul Brynner and Deborah Kerr.

"_It's all Charlie Brown teacher talk to me," Paris said, not acknowledging his presence._

In every Peanuts television special, every time the teacher talks, all you hear is indiscriminate noise, and I bet your best friend can do an impression for you. :)

"_You heard me. You lull Rory into a false sense of security, gain her trust, only to be screwing around behind her back this whole time? You disgust me, and you're damn lucky if she doesn't pull a Lorena Bobbitt on your ass," Paris said._

Ah yes, Lorena Bobbitt: the famous case where she cut off his you-know-what because you-know-why. And that's all I have to say about that. (Like the subtle "Forrest Gump" reference there? I thought you would.)

"_Hey Bill, where's Ted?" Rory asked. _

"_Off having an excellent adventure without me, I suspect," Colin replied easily, stopping and looking around._

Of course, this is another famous duo reference starring Colin and Finn as Bill and Ted from "Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventures."

"_I don't know what Hermione's talking about, Professor Trelawney knows her stuff," Rory joked._

Finally, a Harry Potter reference:) Professor Trelawney is a Hogwarts teacher who teaches Divination, and though she is for real on occasion (one very important occasion as you well know if you've read all the books), for most of the time she comes off as a crackpot, and Hermione seriously doubts her validity.

"_Happy talking talking happy talk…" Lorelai sang, complete with hand puppets. _

"_Don't you know when to cut her off from the fruity drinks?" Luke said, taking a cup of Miss Patty's punch out of Lorelai's hand and dropping it in the trash can. The server at the punch table just shrugged._

"_No! No cutting off! I'm thisclose to Bali H'ai," Lorelai whined._

"_Ok, Bloody Mary, time to go home," Luke said, taking her arm and leading her away._

Lorelai is doing a Bloody Mary impression from the movie musical "South Pacific." Did anybody else think they used too much tinting in that movie? I mean, it's exotic, we get it, the screen doesn't need to go all red and fuzzy.

"_I'm coming to join you, Elizabeth!" Lorelai said in a gravelly voice._

"_Geez," Luke said, rolling his eyes. "You're not gonna have a heart attack. Where's your car?"_

A Redd Foxx impression! Woo hoo! As Fred Sanford on "Sanford & Son," Foxx often clutches his heart dramatically and sways about the room, shouting "I'm comin' to join you, Elizabeth! It's the Big One!" to which his son either grunts in disgust or ignores him.

"_Awwwwwww…." Lorelai said, petting the hood. "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, we still love you," she cooed._

"Chitty Chitty Bang Bang," a cute kids movie starring Dick Van Dyke that is now a Broadway musical.

"_Stay cool, boy," Finn said._

"_Um, Finn, now's not the time, unless you wanna involve a real life Officer Krupke," Rory said, slipping off the bench._

Yes, yes, I know, more "West Side Story" references. What can I say? They work.

"_Lead the way, Jeeves," she said, placing her hand in his, resigned to her fate._

Jeeves as in P.G. Wodehouse's character from the Jeeves and Wooster series of books (which were also well-characterized in the Masterpiece Theater tv mini-series starring Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie, better known for his current role on "House").

"_Yeah, right, and Spicoli's a Mensa candidate," Rory said rolling her eyes. She grinned as they hurried to her house. _

That's right, Spicoli, Sean Penn's stoner creation from Cameron Crowe's "Fast Times at Ridgemont High," directed by Amy Heckerling... recognize that name? Oh yeah, she directed another little movie...called "Clueless!"

* * *

**Chapter 12**

"_You know, Rick Steves says there's nothing like a little premarital travel to test your relationship," Logan said, leaning his seat back. It was 11:00 Eastern Time, and they were somewhere over the ocean at that point._

Rick Steves is a travel guide; he has a book series and television show about his Travels in Europe, and you might remember that when Rory and Lorelai were planning their backpacking trip, one of the books that the Gilmores were disgusted by was "Europe Through the Back Door," one of Steves' most popular guides.

"_A joke?" Rory asked. _

"_Yeah. So Gore Vidal, Gabriel Garcia Marquez, and Norman Mailer all walk into a bar," Logan said._

All important authors; let's assume that Logan's joke was going to be bad. Really bad.

"_Yeah, especially those choose-your-own-adventure books. Did you ever read those when you were a kid?" Rory asked._

There is a series of books called Choose Your Own Adventure. They are a story-based game book and started in 1979 and the series includes 184 books. The last one was published in 1998, and they are now out of print.

"_Is that your way of saying you wanna hit the Eurostar and country hop?" Logan said._

The Eurostar is a high-speed passenger train that transports you between major European cities.

"_Absolutely," Rory said. "Although I feel like Maurice Chevalier should be singing in the background," Rory said. _

"_How's that?" Logan asked. "I just feel very Gigi at the moment… the movie, not the sister," Rory clarified. _

"_Ah. Well, I have to say I agree with my man Maurice… thank heaven for little girls. They do grow up in the most delightful way!" Logan said with a smirk. They left the department store and Logan led her to the hotel._

Gigi is a movie musical in which Leslie Caron, as Gigi, transforms from a cheeky girl to a beautiful young woman, and a man who was her friend when she was a child now sees her as a woman and starts to buy things for her and cultivate her to be his mistress. All of this goes on while Maurice Chevalier observes the happenings, and one of the most famous songs from that movie is "Thank Heaven For Little Girls," which sounds pedo, but really isn't.

_It was turning into a real Tom Hanks/Meg Ryan moment, and he wasn't sure he was comfortable with that._

Just another way of saying it's a rather Nora Ephron moment. Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan made a series of romantic comedies in the 1980s-90s.

"_Oh yeah," Rory said. "I'm sleepy, so sleepy," she said mischievously, giving him big pouty eyes. "Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?" she asked innocently._

Rory is quoting from the song "Lady Marmalade," first recorded by Patti LaBelle and then re-recorded by Christina Aguilera, Pink, Mya, and Lil' Kim for the film "Moulin Rouge." The song is about a… shall we say… lady of the night in New Orleans, and one of her guests.

* * *

Translations for Chapter 12:

"Chauffeur, vous pouvez arrêter ici." Driver, you can stop here.

"Puis-je vous aider?" asked the woman behind the counter. May I help you?

"En fait, vous pouvez," Logan said, an idea slowly forming in his head. Actually, you can...

"Bonjour madame, comment ça va?" Hello, ma'am. How are you?

"Comme ci, comme ça. C'est aujourd'hui froid," the middle-aged woman replied. So-so. It's cold today.

"Ah, mais c'est l'hiver!" Logan pointed out. Ah, but it's winter!

"Cela est vrai," she laughed. "Et vous, comment ça va?" she asked, gesturing to the pair. That's true. And you, how are you?

"Ah, nous sommes dans l'amour!" Logan said playfully, hugging Rory. She offered a sweet smile. Ah, we are in love!

"Bien, bien! Que peux-je faire pour vous?" she asked. Good, fine! What can I do for you?

"Nous aimerions une pièce, s'il vous plaît," Logan requested, flashing the famous Huntzberger smile. We'd like a room, please.

"Bien, j'ai seulement la suite de lune de miel disponible," she said. Ok, I only have the honeymoon suite available.

"Cela serait parfait. Merci," Logan said. That would be perfect.

"Et ici la clef," she said, handing over the key and getting the paperwork ready. And here's the key.

"Merci beaucoup," Logan said. Thank you very much.

"Sortez-vous sur la ville?" the woman asked from behind the counter. Are you going out in the city?

"Oui, nous allons aux musées," Logan said, pausing to answer her. Yes, we're going to the museums.

"Bon. Amusez-vous, Monsieur Huntzberger," she said. Good. Have fun, Mr. Huntzberger.

"Merci. Au revoir," Logan said. Thank you. Goodbye.

Rory rolled her eyes. "Ferme ta bouche," she said loftily. Shut up. (Shut your mouth, really.)

"Voulez-vous danser?" he asked. Do you want to dance?

"Vous êtes belle," he persisted. You are beautiful.

"Je suis (I am)… ugh, what's the word for married? J'ai un homme, (I have a man) um… crap, that's not right," Rory said, trying to communicate.

"Excusez-moi, mais j'aimerais danser avec ma femme," Logan said, a hint of steel in his voice. Excuse me, but I'd like to dance with my wife.

"Votre femme?" the man said in surprise."Désolé," he said. Your wife? Sorry!

* * *

**Chapter 13**

"_John Cleese. Ministry of Silly Walks," Rory explained._

Rory is referring to a popular Monty Python sketch where John Cleese, as the Minister of Silly Walks which features the long-legged Python explaining his department's woes and demonstrating his own Silly Walk.

"_Because that's perhaps an even bigger deal than what we've just done, and we've only just begun -" _

"_Hey, Karen, I know," Logan said with a smirk, catching her unintentional reference. "I didn't say those either."_

Logan created a reference to a popular Carpenters song: "We've Only Just Begun." He teased Rory for the role of Karen Carpenter.

"_No. I'm taking a very important quiz; I'm about to find out if I'm a Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, or Miranda."_

Rory's quiz, no doubt from a Cosmo-like magazine, is a personality test to see which Sex in the City gal she's most like. Who out there agrees with my Miranda theory?

"_Yeah, you know, that way if I ever have the urge to be Esther Williams, bada-bing-bada-boom! Don't you want to turn me into a Million Dollar Mermaid?"_

Lorelai wants to be Esther Williams, movie star of the 40s and 50s who was famous for her movies that inevitably landed the bathing beauty in a swimming pool, either alone or surrounded by a bevy of females doing synchronized swimming for a very Busby Berkeley effect. Million Dollar Mermaid was probably her biggest movie.

"_I already gave you a skating rink. That ought to fill my quota of crazy home improvement requests. I'm already pulling full time Vila duty."_

Luke is comparing himself to Bob Vila, home improvement go-to guy.

"I know," Lorelai said, "and as sexy as your Bob Vila routine is, and as thankful as I am that you are more Vila than Taylor - "

" Elizabeth?"

"Tim."

Obviously Lorelai does not mean to compare Luke to Elizabeth Taylor, but rather to fictitious Tim Taylor, Tim Allen's character on the TV show "Home Improvement" (which, incidentally, featured many guest appearances by Bob Vila).

"_I'll bet," Lorelai said dryly. She tried to get her mind out of the gutter. "So, did you see Gene Kelly?"_

Lorelai is referring to one of Gene Kelly's most famous roles as Jerry Mulligan in "An American in Paris," where he played an ex-GI who wanted to become an artist and stayed behind after the war, eventually meeting and falling in love with Leslie Caron so they could do a 17 minute ballet and live happily ever after.

"_I know, but he's the only American in Paris I know. Ooh, except Sabrina!"_

"_Which one? Audrey Hepburn or Julia Ormond?" _

"Sabrina" was first made in 1954 starring Audrey Hepburn as the title role and Humphrey Bogart and William Holden as her love interests and was remade in 1995 with Julia Ormond as Sabrina Fairchild and starred Harrison Ford and Greg Kinnear as her love interests. Both are fantabulous movies, although for the first time in my life I actually prefer the remake. (The same does not hold true for Born Yesterday because Judy Holliday is too perfect.)

_Lorelai just looked at her. "Did Davey just discover Alice in Wonderland?" she asked._

Sookie is experiencing that phenomenon which is bound to happen to all children: Davey has a favorite movie that he has to watch over and over a billion times a day. Davey chose "Alice in Wonderland," a 1950s Disney movie adaptation of the Lewis Carroll books, causing Sookie to be able to sing "The Unbirthday Song" in her sleep.

* * *

**Chapter 14**

"_Yeah, you know, alcohol. The great social lubricant. Makes white people dance and what not," Colin said dryly. _

The "makes white people dance" reference is to a song by Brad Paisley called "Alcohol." I know, the world has ended, I've used a country song reference.

"_Give me two piña coladas; I need one for each hand," Rory said with a smirk. _

And another country song reference! What can I say? I'm feeling southern today. This is the first line of the chorus from the Garth Brooks song "Two Piña Coladas." Hey, at least I didn't reference the "American Honkey Tonk Bar Association." Ok, time to change the radio station.

"_Shut up! Did you guys elope?" Stephanie asked. "I can't believe it. There went the line. I mean, it was an unbe-fuckin-lievably long line, and you just demolished it. Unless this was like a Britney Spears wedding? Cuz then it won't really count." _

"_Or a Ross and Rachel," Colin said. _

"_No," Finn said in a rare moment of clarity, "Ross and Rachel were drunk. Ross didn't go out and buy a freaking ring. Well, not til another season, anyway, and that's another story entirely. I can't believe you didn't tell us! This is so uncool. I was hoping to be a best man, man." _

Ok, so everyone remember Britney Spears' brief and annulled marriage to her friend? This was before the K-Fed debacle. Also, the Ross and Rachel reference is of course to "Friends" when Ross and Rachel got drunk and got married in Vegas, and a few seasons later when Rachel had just had her baby, Ross was going to propose, but as in all good sitcoms it got screwed up when Joey found the ring and more fun ensued.

"_Allow me to translate," Rory said. "The wedding was more of a J-Lo affair." _

Remember Bennifer? The first one? That's right, the one that didn't happen despite a ridiculously expensive pink diamond engagement ring.

"_Hey, you try being forced to sing "Baby Face" sans the "baby"s at your dad's girlfriend's baby shower and tell me you wouldn't be scarred for life." _

This is a reference to episode 3.06, "Take the Deviled Eggs." Remember Sherry's awful baby shower?

"_Yeah, and that's Donald Trump's real hair," Lorelai scoffed. _

"_Ok, fine, so there is a distinct possibility that I need to do laundry," Rory admitted. _

"_Ha ha! I knew it," Lorelai crowed. "You caved so easily. I didn't even get to do my Omarosa impression," she pouted. _

Ok, so you all have seen the weirdness that is Donald Trump's hairstyle, right? And Omarosa was one of the more famous contestants on the first "Apprentice."

"_Yeah, check out my frosting," Rory said._

This is a reference to the movie "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" where Kate Hudson's character helps out Matthew McConaughey's advertising firm with a diamond slogan labeling diamonds as "frosting."

* * *

**Chapter 15**

_Lorelai leaned in conspiratorially. "Honey, I'm gonna let you in on a little secret courtesy of Nia Vardalos: The man may be the head of the family, but the woman is the neck, and she can turn the head any way she wants."_

A quote from "My Big Fat Greek Wedding."

"_Well grandpa called the other day to ask about a book, and Logan answered my phone, which was mistake number one, and they got to talking about something… what? Oh, Logan says they were talking about Scotch - "_

"_Tape?"_

"_Beverage."_

"_Ah. Cuz, you know, I was having SNL flashbacks. Plaid everywhere."_

Lorelai is referring to the classic SNL sketch "Scotch Boutique," featuring Gilda Radner working in a store that sells nothing but Scotch tape.

"_Well, halleluiah! Lead me to Martiniland," Lorelai said._

"_Martiniland?" Emily said with a raised eyebrow._

"_Yes, it's right next to Margaritaville," Lorelai replied._

Ah, yes, Margaritaville. A Jimmy Buffett song that you all should know by heart... and a place we should visit often.

"_Are you kidding me? Naked City! Who wouldn't want to live in the Sun Aura Nudist Resort? The place has a giant lady's leg sundial."_

There is an actual place called Sun Aura Nudist Resort, and yes, they do have a giant lady's leg sundial. You know you want to Google it.

"_Are you kidding me? Pâté, French for 'dog food'?" Lorelai said, astounded. "We need to re-educate him."_

"_Re-educate in the Chinese Cultural Revolution sense?" Rory asked._

First of all, pâté isn't really French for 'dog food.' Second of all, in the 1950s during the Chinese Cultural Revolution, an ideological movement led by Mao Zedong, masses of people were sent to the countryside in forced labor camps to be 're-educated'. (Who knew fan fiction could lead to a history lesson?)

"_Make sure to tell him about the Rory curtain. Bye!" Lorelai said, driving away._

You remember the Rory curtain, right? When Rory noticed some little kids gawking over a Showgirls VHS case at the video store in Stars Hollow, she suggested that the box be moved to a higher shelf. As a result, Taylor took every movie that could possibly be construed as inappropriate and put it behind a curtain, naming it the 'Rory curtain.' (And let's not forget how Jess helped her get Taylor back... gotta love him.)

"_Yeah, well, I'm no Phoebe Buffay, but I can certainly try." Rory said, straddling his back and beginning to rub his shoulders. "Besides, you're my lobster," she said._

Reference to Lisa Kudrow's character on "Friends." As for the lobster:

**Phoebe:** Hang in there, it's gonna happen.  
**Ross:** What? Okay, now how do you know that?  
**Phoebe:** Because she's your lobster.  
**Chandler:** Oh, she's goin' somewhere.  
**Phoebe:** Come on, you guys. It's a known fact that lobsters fall in love and mate for life. You know what? You can actually see old lobster couples walkin' around their tank, you know, holding claws like...

* * *

**Chapter 16**

"_Oh," Rory said, touching the scarf wrapped whimsically around her throat. "I was feeling very Mary Tyler Moore this morning."_

"_Ah. Looks like you'll make it after all," Lorelai quipped._

The scarf really is a very Mary Tyler Moore look, and Lorelai was quoting a line from the theme song to the Mary Tyler Moore Show.

"_Yuh huh!" Rory insisted. "What, am I gonna have to pull a Laverne DeFazio?" she said, cocking her head to one side._

Laverne as in "Laverne and Shirley," a great comedy from the 70s. Laverne had an "L" embroidered on every shirt she owned.

_Logan frowned and took her hand, following her into the crowd. He rubbed his backside, muttering to himself. "That was my own personal butt…"_

"_Come on, Donkey," Rory said, rolling her eyes._

Logan quoted Donkey from Shrek!

"_Well I don't know," Brian said defensively. "I mean, if we are keeping with the Lewis Carroll theme here, she could go for authenticity and we'd all be tripping before the tea party even starts."_

Lewis Carroll, the author of all the Alice books, was rumored to be... how shall we say... chemically altered when he wrote of her journeys in Wonderland.

"_Oh, I didn't buy it. Mother made it for me for our high school production of Harvey."_

Harvey was first a play, then a movie starring Jimmy Stewart as Elwood P. Dowd, a man who had an invisible rabbit... well, actually, a pooka, for a best friend. It's a quiet, good-natured film, but there are some unforgettable lines in it!

"_Perhaps you should tell it again to those people," Paris said, pointing. "We need a representative sampling of the party population to gauge the success of the joke."_

"_What is this, the Aristocrats?" Colin snorted._

A reference to the recent movie, "The Aristocrats," where comics tell the same joke over and over again, and it is received differently by different audiences. Of course, the joke changes in raunch factor...

"_I love that movie!" cried Lulu, passing by. "Everybody wants to be a cat…" she sang as she walked._

And Lulu thinks they said "Aristocats," a Disney animated movie about cats.

"_I've been really tryin , baby…tryin to hold back these feelings for so long. And if you feel, like I feel baby, come on, oh come on…let's get it on," they sang._

"Let's Get It On," by Marvin Gaye. You know you know it.

"_Aw, come on, why not?" he cajoled. "There's a wide variety of selections. For example, we could sing Cruisin', I've Had the Time of My Life, Something Stupid, A Whole New World…Hell, let's go High School Musical on this crowd. It'll be the Start of Something New."_

"_Hmm. How do you feel about the Sounds of Silence?" Rory said sweetly._

All those are famous duets, and High School Musical was a recent smash hit on the Disney Channel... and in pre-teen DVD players everywhere. "The Start of Something New" is a song from it. Rory's comeback, and the "Sounds of Silence" is a Simon and Garfunkel song.

"_You kids go talk in your room, but when there's a quiet moment, you got some 'splainin to do!" Lorelai said quietly, pushing Logan and Rory through her bedroom door and shutting it behind them._

Lorelai is using Ricky Ricardo's favorite famous expression: Luuuuuucy, you got some 'splainin' to do!

* * *

**Chapter 17**

"_Oh, he went out the back door… I guess you didn't see him. He was having another one of his nightmares. When I woke him up he shouted, 'I want the purple carrots' and then 'on with their heads… on, dammit!'" _

Ok, so the purple carrots are completely random, but as for the second part, I believe Kirk was having Queen of Hearts nightmares where she was shouting 'off with their heads!'

"_A lockbox?" Lorelai said, a gleam in her eye. _

Ok, think way back to SNL Presidential debates between Gore and Bush in 2000. Will Ferrell as Bush and Darrell Hammond as **Gore**: "I happen to agree with Governor Bush on that, and I commend him for it. But let me add something in my plan. The "lock-box" would also be camouflaged. Now, to all outward appearances, it would be a leather-bound edition of The Count of Monte Cristo, by Alexander Dumas. But it wouldn't be. It would be the "lock-box". **Jim****Lehrer**: We are almost out of time, so I will instead ask each candidate to sum up, in a single word, the best argument for his candidacy. Governor Bush? **George W. Bush**: Strategery. **Jim Lehrer**: stunned Vice-President Gore. **Al Gore**: "Lock-box". **Jim Lehrer**: This concludes the first debate. Thank you."

_Rory winced and sat down next to Lorelai. "Well, we brought the rings out of retirement for one night to play a trick on Colin and Steph and Finn at the pub. We got them pretty good and then just had a normal rest of the evening. I had no idea that a son of a son of-"_

"_A sailor?" Lorelai offered. Rory glared at her. "I'm sorry, was that not an insert-Jimmy-Buffett-reference-here moment?" _

Obviously, the name of a Jimmy Buffett song.

"_Seriously, come on, give it a try. Many a decision has been made based on what the all-knowing Magic 8 Ball says. Shall I wear the shirt with the rhinestone penis? Do I want to buy that Kenny G album? Should I marry Max?" _

More of a Gilmore universe reference. Remember when Rory said to Logan that he needed to remind her to tell him about the time her mother wore a shirt with a rhinestone penis to dinner. Also, for those who don't spend much time in elevators, Kenny G plays saxophone. Guaranteed to put you to sleep in 15 minutes or less.

"_Hey, don't look at me. I recall you and Finn wanting to finish a re-enactment of… let's see, what was it now… Last Tango in Paris?" Logan said innocently. "I'll have the omelet and a cup of coffee, thanks," he said to the waiter. _

Last Tango in Paris. A very erotic film starring a middle-aged Marlon Brando and some French chick who was never in anything else again. Well, nothing in English, anyway.

_Logan laughed. "Don't worry, I am. I think you were actually re-enacting Pirates of the Caribbean. Finn was both Jack Sparrow and Will Turner and you got to be Elizabeth and… um… Davy Jones, I think." _

Ok, well, you know this reference, but I just threw it in so you go see the movie. Lots of swashbuckling. Great fun.

"_Um, Luke's, I think. Today is Moroccan Tribute to Casablanca Day at Al's, and I think last time his couscous gave me diarrhea." _

For those who don't know, Casablanca (yes, like the movie) is a city in Morocco.

"_Ok, too much information, CIA-Leaker-Guy." _

And Lorelai said this because we still don't know who leaked. The end.

"_Hear me out, Rory," Mitchum said, putting up a hand to quiet her. " Logan has a certain lifestyle that he will need to maintain. None of us choose it, necessarily. It's just the way the business works. And a part of that lifestyle is a supportive wife. This may sound too Donna Reed to you, but if you were to marry Logan someday, your role would be a supporting one. You would not be able to go off and cover the Middle East for CNN because you'd already be busy hosting networking functions and logging time on charity boards." _

Donna Reed, as in the impossibly perfect housewife of television in the 1950s. Also, Rory dressed up as Donna Reed in the early years.

"_Yours and mine, not mine and his," Rory said dryly. "Apparently I need to choose between becoming Christiane Amanpour and your trophy wife." _

Christiane Amanpour is CNN's chief international correspondent… and also Rory's professional idol.

"_No, Logan," Rory said, shaking off his hands and folding hers across her chest. "You're the risk taker. I play it safe. You're a Lamborghini and I'm a Volvo. Your idea of a thrill is to go skydiving while mine is to find an original signed edition of The Fountainhead. We're too different, and this is never going to work. Your parents are right; I'm not the right girl for you. I'm not a cheap fling sort of girl, but I'm not going to be a society wife, either. So the way I see it, we're getting in too deep to be just having fun, and if we're not going to get married in the end, then it's just not worth it to continue. Now I know you may have random excuses but can you really prove me wrong?" _

Lamborghini insanely fast and insanely expensive car. Volvo safest make of cars. Oh yeah, and The Fountainhead, one of Rory's favorite books, though Jess thought Ayn Rand was nuts.

* * *

**Chapter 18**

"_God, I hope so," Colin said. "So, guess who else we saw in the parking lot?" _

"_Suri Cruise?" Logan offered._

"_Yeah, and she was chillin' with Bigfoot and Loch Ness," Colin scoffed. "No, actually, we saw Rory Gilmore."_

Ah yes, the ever-present mystery surrounding the TomKat spawn. So a handful of celebrities have seen her…but does she exist? Hm? Where are the pictures, people? (Ok so personally I don't think it's a conspiracy or that the kid is a freak, but it's way more fun to pretend.)

"_Don't worry, that won't be a problem," Paris said, stamping into the common area and slamming some glue down on her craft table._

"_Whoa, hey, don't take it out on Elmer," Rory said, concerned the glue would explode with the force._

Elmer, as in Elmer's Glue, the white stuff everyone uses.

"_Rory, geez, get some perspective. My need for bonding and drinking overrules your discomfort level at bumping into your ex-boyfriend. Besides, you're not gonna let Mr. SexyBack dictate where you can and can not hang out, are you? He can't claim the pub as his own. That's not fair. It's common ground."_

SexyBack like Justin Timberlake. You think he's bringing it? (And since when did the initials "JT" automatically stand for Justin Timberlake? I thought it was James Taylor! The man has a freaking album named JT!)

"_Hello, friends," Rory slurred, plopping down on the barstool next to Paris, giggling. "I'm your Vita…meta…vega…whatsit girl. Are you tired, run down, listless? Do you pop out at parties? Are you unpoopular? The answer to all your problems is in this bittle lottle," she said, tapping her drink._

Drunk Rory is doing her Lucy Ricardo impression from I Love Lucy's first season episode "Lucy Does a Television Commercial." You all know the Vitameatavegamin routine, right? Yes, with Vitameatavegamin, you can spoon your way to good health.

"_Oh, come on, use your imagination, Paris," Rory chided. She thought for a minute, though her thoughts were very fuzzy. "Hey, Paris, did you ever wish your parents named you Normandy?"_

Normandy, another famous French place. Doesn't make for a really great name, though. (My apologies to anyone named Normandy.)

"_So, we didn't do any Coyote Ugly impressions last night, did we?" Paris asked cautiously._

Coyote Ugly, the famous bar/movie where there is much dancing on the bar.

"_You, on the other hand," Rory said, her eyes shining with laughter, "got up on your barstool and sang 'Pour Some Sugar on Me' to the 1:30 last call crowd."_

Ah yes, a classic rock song by Def Leppard. And we don't mean Last Call as in Carson Daly, though come to think of it, that works too. Last call usually happens at 1:30 a.m. and is your last chance to order a drink because the bar closes at 2.

* * *

**Chapter 19**

"_Are we talking 'wheel of' or the cookie variety?" Lorelai asked, shutting the door behind her._

Wheel of Fortune, the game show hosted by Pat Sajak and assisted by the lovely Vanna White, who officially has the easiest job in the history of the world. (And does anybody else have this problem: when you hum the theme song in your head, does it eventually turn into Ghostbusters?)

"_Aw, hon, I'm sorry, but you're gonna have to give me more than 'Eleven Andy Sober Me.' Little Orphan Annie couldn't decode that one."_

Little Orphan Annie started out as a comic strip and then became a radio show. She was an orphan who fought Nazis, uncovered crooked politicians, and dodged gangster's bullets. Ovaltine was one of the sponsors of the radio show, and if you sent in a seal from a jar, you could become a member of her club, and as a reward you were sent a decoder. (Anybody see A Christmas Story?)

"_Aw, we didn't even get a chance to MadGab. Oh well. Now it makes more sense. Well… almost. What brought this on?"_

MadGab, a board game that has cards with nonsensical phrases written on one side, and one person reads them until the nonsensical words come out of your mouth like the phrases they're really meant to be. The goal is to figure out what you're saying. Like "dew ache who gulls urge" or "ask rude arrive her." Say that out loud. See what I mean?


End file.
